Kankakee Valley Post, Volume 10, Number 22, DeMotte, Jasper County, 18 April 1940 — LIFE'S LITTLE JESTS [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

LIFE'S LITTLE JESTS

Not His Teacher —Now, Tommy, if you have ten cents in one pocket, and twelve cents in the other, what have yop? Tommy—The wrong trousers. Her Job Stout Employer—Miss Broun, I'm afraid I'll have to—er—reduce- . * Typist—-Oh, Mr. Smith, I wasn't in earnest when I said I didn't like fat men. A Scotsman we know has the very latest thing in golf socks. There are eighteen holes in one. Interference Judge-d-Can't this case be settled out of court? Pat —That is what we waz tryin’ to do. yer honor, when the police interfered. ■ • Less and Less Mistress (hearing crash from kitchen) More dft/ds, Mary? Maid — .Vo, mum -less.’ Easily Identified With a worried look on her face, the shopper tackled the shopwalker. “I was to have met my husband here two hours ago,” she explained. “I wonder if you've seen him about here?” “Possibly, madam,” said the shopwalker politely. “Was there —er—anything distinctive about him?” “Well,” replied the lady slowly, “I should imagine he's purple by now.” Found It Good “Jack Admires everything about me. My hair, my eyes, my hands, my teeth, my “Well, don't you admire anything about him?” “Why, yes—his taste.” Fair Warning Marilyn—Joanne, don’t drink out of that faucet. You might get the same thing I got. Joanne-i-What did you get? Marilyn—Water.