Kankakee Valley Post, Volume 2, Number 28, DeMotte, Jasper County, 2 February 1933 — The Household [ARTICLE]

The Household

By LYDIA LE BARON WALKER

If you would spare yourself much trouble of mind during this New Year don’t hunt for hurts. Probably many of you are saying, “What a strange idea! Who would hunt for hurts?” But strange as it may seem, many of us do. For example, when you were out last evening one of the company said something which bothered you. What did she mean? There was an interpretation which could be put upon the words which would be disparaging. Had the woman meant what she said to be taken so, or not? If she did, she certainly was unkind, really rather horrid. And you mull over the sentence until it seems as though

there could be no other intention, nor any other possible construction of the sentence than the unkind one. Mental Strife Such thoughts stir up strife in your mind. You begin to dissect the woman’s life, as you know it, and all the disagreeable ways she has, and all the odd things she has ever said, until her character is pretty disagreeable all around. You are upset and bothered. You have been hunting for trouble. It is quite likely that the woman had no slurring thought in her mind toward you. She may be entirely unaware of how hurt you are, and when next you see her, she feels there is a restraint in you, a reserve toward her which rankles. And she, not thinking for a moment that she brought this feeling of yours forth, begins to see you in an unexpected light. She commences to think of your “off side," and to find your faults. Now it is she who is hunting for trouble. One sure way not to hunt for trouble is always to pu the best construction on what persons say. Some people have an unfortunate way of saying the wrong thing, without really meaning any harm. They have not learned to express themselves graciously. It is regrettable that they do not know this is their handicap, and how many enemies it can make for them. Believing the Best There are persons who write in a brusque way, and others who have an abrupt manner over the telephone. If you are hunting for hurts you will be annoyed by the tone of the letters, or by the curtness of the telephone call. Let these persons have the benefit of the doubt. When there is any ques tion in your mind believe the best. If it is their manner, they did not intend anything unkind. It is they who will suffer in the long run by failing

to cultivate a happy manner of speaking, or a friendly style of writing. It is not you who should bother. Rely upon your best thoughts of these persons instead of hunting for hurts in their unfortunate manners. ©, Bell Syndicate.--WNU Service.