Jasper Weekly Courier, Volume 55, Number 27, Jasper, Dubois County, 25 April 1913 — Page 4

JASPER COURIER

JASFJKK, DÜil.llS COUNTS', INDIANA 'tfitvrtU ttia PoatoiHcw at Jasper, lad tr trasmtsaloii tncougli tbe m&fl as sec oad alasi matter. Hnbwrintfcn 1.60 P3r Year. Thii papei is m-jiled iegularly to it ubicribtri until a Jefinite order to discontinue m received and all arrears paid in full; unlees in tlie discretion of the publiflhei a different course should be deemed advisable. FRIDAY, APRIL 25, 1913. Poor He Gox. Postmasters-Cold Feet, The Washington correspondent of the Indianapolis Sun had the following write-up of our dearly beloved billiecox in their issue of Sunday April 20, 1913. It speaks for it3elf in showing up the egoitical ignorance of the party who misrepresents the 3d district at a salary df over $8000 per year There are a number of Indiana congressmen who should worry, for these be parlous days for them. There are a large number of fair-to-middlin' postofhees in this state, and about ten candi dates for each and every one of them. Now, there is Billy Cox, down in the third district, as an instance. Early last fall, Billy decided that he would select the men for the various offices in his district before congress met m in December, and thus relieve him self during the session of all problems that might interfere with his close attention to being a statesman. It was a great scheme, quoth Billy, and he started on his way with a glad some heart. He hadn't gone far however, ere he discovered that he had troubles and the gladsomeness faded from Ws warm heart. He found oodles of candidates for each postoffice and each one had an argument in his own favor that no on ressman with a hope of a f.iw.j would dare thrust aside u . mptorily. Things deve'oped fast for Billy and he contracted a frigid affliction of the fret that was not superinduced by weather conditions He succeeded in fixing on three or four candidates for as many postoffices and then his chilblains became so aggravated that he decided that only a quick hike to Washington would relieve them. He hiked and hiked fast. Since then the small army of candidates for the remaining offices in the third district have been gnashing their teeth and throwing fits so plentifully that Billy finds it quite impossible to listen, with patience, to anyone who attempts to sing "Home, Sweet Home," for he can't see anything sweet about it The last session of congress in its dying moments passed a bill prohibiting the killing of migratory birds. Bird lovers and sportsmen from all sections of the country strongly advocated the adoption of this law for the reason that, it would put an end to the slaughter of wild ducks, especially, while they were in flight towaid nesting grounds and after many of them had mated for the season, It was shown that many ducks were killed on northern flight that contained eggs, thus proving that mating had even taken place in the south and before the flight be gins. During the debate on the bill, that lournai ot merry quip and jest, the Congressional Re cord, tells us that our own and only Congressman Billy Cox entered into the discussion with all his ' 4 welUknown eloquence and logic," He protested against the passage of the prohibitory bill because some rich 'men hunt in automobiles' and those who have no automobiles can not go "on pleasure jaunts and trips, slaying, slaughtering and killing game."' While the Congression al Record does not point out the humor of the thing, the reader will at once note that slaying slaughtering and killing is some fuhnv as a nhrase all by itself, A number of sportmeri's journals DtV maüe me discovery ana they are having a lot of fun at OMr Klllv's XDenie. One JOUr - wUeven suggests that Billy in-

"Slaughtering, Slaying and Killing."

tended to convey the' idea that,

after a bird had been slayed, slaughtered and killed1' that it must of necessity, be quite dead, and probably he did. John Birke came home yester day from Louisville where he was on a business trip. John says he is a candidate for United States Senator; butbetween you and me and the gate post he will be satisfied if he lands feet fore most in the County Recorders of fice next year and John will make an excellent Recorder. A Jasper needs one about as bad as a dirt wagon needs six wheels. The whole idea in a nutshell is some saloon men want- to freeze out opposition. With a city charter the Saloon, license will be raised to $500.00 instead of the $300.00 at nresent. This scheme would be all right if all 13 saloons stuck as it would raise !

City

Charter

$2600.00 more every yer. But ! Foster-Milburn Co., Props., Bufthat is not the idea, but to put ;falo, N. Y.

about seven saloons out df business, the other six will pay $500. or $3000.00 a year, whereas at tili t ft r s f r " present trie town gees yuu.uu So the ordinary taxpayer will have to dig down in his jeans to raise the extra $900.00 the town looses by becoming a city. Go after it. A vile housefly after ' having tramped through the sfmitum of a tuberculosis victimts comfortably for a momefit'on the butter plate, sips from tfie glass of milk afterwards drawing its filthy anatomy over the meat platter. The nasty beäst was born in a manure ) tie, carries six million disease germs along with it and is a filthy impudent beastSwat the fly, especially when he lights on your nose. Begin early by removing his breeding places. When one stands before the open door of eternity his desire to scoff at religion vanishes. We admit there are bad men in the church, but even these black sheep in the flock might be bdacker if they were outside. No young man, or old one either should condemn the noble effort the army of Christian men and women are making towards bet tering the condition of things, and whether we attend church or not, but few of us would desire to live in a community where there is no church. Some Answers. To Questions at a recent examination of the Senior Glass of the J. H. 5. r The Salic law is that you must take everything with a grain of salt" 4 4 Julius Caesar was reknown for his great strength. He threw a bridge across the Rhine " 'The zodiac is the zoo of the sky, where lions, goats and other animals go alter they are dead." The Pharisees were people who liked to show off their goodness by praying to synonyms " An abstract noun is some thing you can't see when you ! are looking at it Algebraic symbols are used when you do not know what you . are talking about." Some Seniors plan their prepara tion Upon a plane of high persistence. But most of them fall in along The line of least resistence. By the Freshmen Tho 'Black SheepWhat," asked the man who had returned to his native town after an absence of many years, "became of Ed Ferguson?" "Ed? Oh, he's doin fine. Got the best livery stable anywhere around here and runs the depot hack.'" 'Let's seel He had a younger brother, hadn't he?" "Yes Lern. He never amounted i to much. Wrote poetry and painted ; oictures. I guess the family land of downed him. At least he went away several yet ago, and I dunnö what ever became of him. unica0 Tribi "Do It Now" Subscribe for the Jasper Weekly Courier, E'on't put off for tomorrow what you can do today. An exchange suys: We feel snrrv for t.hp mnn whn Hops not1

,reaa his home paper. He is no,"

better than a man without a coun try. He is like a homeless ipi-iot t.üat Tiqo nn roonlnv .'nnfifnro graZes promiscously on weeds and thistle. No matter what otner paper he may read, the Ll - raiWif fnrwavA fiHwn t n'iwnvn insists on having his home paper

DAYS Of DIZZtHESS. Come Co Hundreds of Jasper People. There are days of dizziness; Spells of headache, languor, backache; Sometimes rheumatic pains; Often urinary disorders. boan's Kidney Pills are especially for kidney ills. Endorsed in Jasper by grateful friends and neighbors . Charles Borho, Main St., Jasper, Ind , says: "I had dizzy spells and headaches and in the morning I could hardly get around- I had terrible attacks of backache and my kidneys were badly disordered Doan's Kidney Pills, which I got at the Flick & Pfau Pharmacy cured me." "When Your Back is LameRemember the Name." Don't simply ask for a kidney remedy ask distinctly for Doan's Kid

ney Pills, the same that Mr. Jtforho had the remedy backed by home testimony . 50c all stores. For sale bv ail dealers. Price o cents. Foster Milburn Co., Buffalo, New Yodv, sole agents for the ivited States. Remember the name Doan's iiud take no other. T elegrapherr8 Crump Än interesting feature of telegrapher's cramp is that certain letters are nearly always the stumbling block. The most frequent are 0 and Y that is, the code signals used for these letters. When a Bender begins to be "conscious'' about so common a letter as Ö his case soon becomes hopeless. Another form of cramp attacks the receiver of the message. It takes the form of inability to write fast enough to take down a message quickly transmitted. This is easily understood when it is remembered that a receiver often has to write continuously to code dictation, so to Bpeak, for hours at a time. The etrain involved is enormous au leads fairly commonly to what practically ;i form of nervous hrr?ak down. I) ipdee Advertiser. His Blunder. "Have voti stopped to think' ho began and then hesitated. "Well" she urged, '"go on. What were you going to say?" "I bog your pardon he replied T was about o ask voii whether you IwA ever stopped to think about something, hut I might have known that you never did. "And you mean to insinuate that I never think ? she demanded. "Oh, no, no, not at all," he made haste to assure her. c only mean that women don't have to stop talking to think, for we all know that they do think sometimes." And Tet he wonders why she hates him. Cleveland Leader. THE NICKEL SHOP. have 5 cents. Hair Out 15c Baths 15c. Everything Sanitary. I invite all my old friends and many new ones to call and see me E. A. SUMMERSCorner 4th and Jackson Sts. be careful to get the genuine BLAck-raugHT Liver Medicine The reputation of this old, reliable medicine, for constipation, indigestion and liver trouble, is firmly established. It does not imitate other medicines. It is better than others, or it would not be the fa- , vorite liver powder, with a larger sale than all others combined. SOLD IN TOWN F2 We know of a number of families who ate regular readers of the Courier tut ! are not sub&ribers, they borrow the pa- ' Per rom their neighbor. Wo are glad to know taat tne Uourier is thüs appreciated, but why not subscribe? The prieeis small and' we would appreciate hsmng these namea ou our mailing lilt. .' hyin these ngM6! oa our M

I It is a very serious matter to ask 9 j for one medicine and have the I : "wrong one given you. For this PI reason we urge you in buying to j

1

o o ? Prudence ana 9 JZohed O ' o Ko-S-oAo-S-of ooo aooj.o4-o.

By M. QUAD. Copyright, 1909. by T. C. McClure. Prudence Smith and Zabed Winters met at spelling school and were impressed with each other. Zabed would have married her if the Widow Penrose hadn't mixed in. She wanted the young man for herself, and in awesome whispers she imparted the information that Prudence Smith was knockloieed and woulct njlwj&be able to stand at a washtub qijpib. up and down the cellar stairs. The young man iwls at once impressed. He ceased to spark Prudence on Sunday nights and assure her that he longed to jump over precipices for her sake, and of course she resented it She went about withher chin in the air and asked for no explanations, and so relations were strained for many long months. Then Zabed's mother found out what was the matter with him and set him right. The widow had lied. Zabed made it up with the girl. Tbe doves came back again and turtted, a new date was set for the marriage, and Farmer Smith reached out his horny hand for a shake and said: "Zabed, gol dura your buttons,, you're gittin' tho real thing, and you orter be the happiest man in Woodchuck co.unty." Zabed was for about two weeks. Then Deacon Gray, who was a widower and wanted Prudence for his second wlfft ffnvn nn crmm l'nfnrmnfi'An. nhmif

Zabed. When he had sworn her to tbe,L,lck and Chicago, on following most awful secrecy he confessed that SCneCillles:

th vnnn? mnn hart .1 livft frnr in his stomach and would probably go mad within two years and cut thethroat of his wife if be' had. one. The frog had jumped, down Zabed's throat one day when he was drinking Jxoin the horse pond, and, though thousands of in ducements had been held out to him, nothing could prevail unon him to jump out. "Well, where is the young girl, no matter how her heart tunks with, love, who is going to marry a young man with a live and gmwing frog In his stomach? She can't be found. She wasn't found in this case. Prudence Smith cooled off on Zabed Winters, and he went about with hist. chin in the air and' was too'proud to -ask for an explanation. It was a'-year before one came. Then a 'lightningod man stayed overnight at Smith's, nd ater snpper he got to talking abqut rogs. Seeing he. was posted on tha suhjer Prudence made 'bold to ask nim if he had ever heard of a frog taking up inside quarters," and he answered that such a thing was absolutely impossible and beyond belief. Zabed Winters had probably swallowed a amall üwh and the fish might be growiacbut it left alone he could in time-itbe fished for and caught. That settled the frog question, and Zabed was invited to come around and make up. He got hustle on him, and the- turtledoves Bang, soft and low, a new date wastappointed, and Farmer Smith stopped chopping wood long enough to extend a hand arid say: "Zabed, you gol durned idioV don't you know when you've got A good thing? Don't fool around any more. Zabed didn't want to, but before it had been decided which minister! should marry them old Mrs. Snyder j struck his trail. She was .too old to! marry, but not too old to utter a warn- j ing for the benefit of a young man j who had put in a day hoeing her garden and refused to take pay for it r She told him right straight out that' Prudence Smith snored like a steam engine, that she had six toes on her right foot and only four on her left,, that she had had St. Vitus dance when , a baby and that it was sure t&ome back on her some day. It migSEot be ; a year after marriage thatZabed would come up from the cornfield some afternoon and. find her dancing all around the dooryard and kicking as high as a fence. That -settled ZabecL He wanted Prudence, but he didn't want a dancing dervish. More coldness, more Ptralned relations. .It was a full year bofore old Mrs. Snyder was proved a liar, and It took three months longer to make up and set another within a fortnight of the date when a tin peddler came along and bought a sheepskin of Zabed and then told iiim tnau jL-ruaence ömun was uem iu tu right ear, nearsighted in both eyes and ! would be tongue tied before she was J i two years older. Zabed hadn't noticed i the deafness or blindness, but he believea in un peaaiers ana at uut-e frigid. Result, another year lost Fate was still in the game, .however, and when- everybody, including the two principals, had made up their minds that there would he no marriage she came loafing around, to do her duty. Farmer Smith and his daughter were in the village one day nyin calico and brown sugar when Zabed Winters appeared. He had eggs to sell for hickory shirting. The levers were brought face to face, but they didn't speak. They thought of frogs and St Vitus' dance and six toed feet and were turning away when FStther Smith reached out one hand for -his daughter and the otaer for Zabed and said: "Say, are you two gol durned idiots?" "Urn!" repUed Prudence. "Um!" rephed Zabed. Tf you wasn't you'd come along with me to the preacher and gitm ried and hev this tarnoshun thinaet tied to once and fur good nnd all. Prudence looked at Zabed. Zabed looked at Trudence, Then they smiled and edgfd. npaew - l? ach other, ant ta htm Utmümf

Get no Gents Value Fop Every Dollar you Spend. A dollar is worth 100 cents value in everything you buy, but do you always' get "value received!" You can give or take from the value of a dollar by the way in which you spend it. Your pleasures in life, your standing and influence in the community depend largely upon tbe value you place on every dollar you own and the value you get on every dollar you spend. Dollars spent unwisely lose their full purchasing power and value to you, careful spending and systematic saving will enable you to secure 'Value received and future independence. You will secure full value for every dollar you spend by reading the advertisements in THE COURIER closely and constantly every week. The COURIER' advertisements will tell you of the best purchasing oppoitunities and direct you to the most reliable stores in Jasper.

The Courier advertisers are let ting down the price bars into the Held of bargains. M:non Route . Effective March 4th, 1012, Monon Route will establish new train service between French i v.uu raL i.V. preneu J,1CK Ar. .UU.A.I. 10.03 PM Lv. West Bauen Ar. ti.55 AM 10.27.PM Lv. Paoli L f. ü. 33 AM 10,40 PM Lv. Orleans Lv. 5.05 AM 11.10 PM Lv, Bedford Lv. 5.35 A 12.01 AM Lv. Bloomington Lv! 4 22 AM 3,00 AM Lv. LaFavetie Lv. 1 43 AM 6.40 AF Ar. 63rd St Chicago Lv 10,30PM 6.4-5 AM Ar. 47th St Chicago Lv 10.25PM 7,00 AM Ar. Dearborn Sta " Lv 10.15PM This train will afford excellent service between-all Southean Indiana points, Chicago, 111 and n termediate stations. Equigment of new train consist of electrically lighted Pullman drawing room compartment sleeping cars and first-class coaches- Southern Ry. trains leaving Evansville 6.20 PM, Cannelton 5.45 PM, Rockport 5-45PM Louisville 4.30 PM will make connections with this new and improved service. J. C. Beam, Jr . AGPA, St. Louis THE BEST REMEDY For aifi forma of Hill fflATISM -7 y Ln'mbaga, SciaHwt, Gout, NeuraJAsthma "6 -DROPS" STOP THE PAIN Gives Quiok Relief It stops the ache3 and cains, re- M lieves swollen joints and muscles Eg ,acts n-lmost like masric. Destroys the excess uric acid and ia Quick, safe and sure in its results. No other remedy like it. Sample free on request. SOLD BY DRUGGISTS One Dollar per bottle, or sent pre paid, upon receipt ox price if not obtainable in your locality. LNSCN RHEUMATIC CÜÄi m Lake Strtel C&caQQ Pi-vi ik m -j i m fm M I mt Bit I ft j Sgg PREVENTION Wbite Diarrhoea Can be Prevented and Cured After years of experiments we have discovered a sure cure or money bacic. . . 25c. Package. 6 Packages, $1.00 Prevention is not a cure-all. It on ty prevents and cures White Diarrhoea in baby chicks and Cholera in older fowls.'' One ounce of prevention is worth tonB of cure. In tajblet orm. PREVENTION CO. Box 1127 Atlantic City, N Y. AGXXT3 YTANTJCD.

Im B RADE MARK

fy Bast Remedy for Constipation, Sick HaadachsH Sou? Stomach. Balchinc and "IS

Ä Livar Troubles. 25c Per

Box at Pruggtsts

lECZSMA, ACNE, PILES, PIMPLES, SCALDS, W E SURKS, WOUNDS, SALT RHEUM, WH3 ft R WORM, Etc., tiNkkfy ktM ky uriftfl tte B "5-DROPS" SALVE W M Z5 Per lex at Druggists ft

Should Keep Name In Paper. . No business man in any town

should allow a newspaper pub lished m his town to cro without his name mentioned snmewhere in its columns. This applies to all kinds of business general store, dry goods stores, grocers, furniture dealers, nrofess'onal men, and in fact all classes of business men- This does not mean that you should have a whole or a half or even a Quarter page ad, in every issue of the paper but your name and busi ness should be mentioned if vou do not use more than a two line space- A stranger picking up a newspaner should be able to tell just what business is represented in a town by lookinfe at the business mentioned in the naner. This is the best possible town advertising. The man who does not advertise Iiis business does an injustice to himself and his town. He is the man who expects the paper to do most of the boosting for Iiis. to wn The man who insists on sharing the business that comes to a town but refuses to advertise his business is not doing his share of this boosting. The life of any town depends upon the live, wide awake and liberal business men. m it. m mi mm The Hoir e Telephone Co' has the largest lit t of subscribers and will give you the best service You can talk to your friends, order your merchandise and make your appointment by the Home 'phone. DUBOIS CG TELEPHONE CO Arilin f 1 mdal Award to I.W.HARPER KENTUCKY WHISKEY ewOricBM IAAS co awarded at Änd"Wbrlüc Fair Chicago for Sale by All Lead'ngDealjrs AM LTICKLED? 99 "Well, I Ruess I am. Did you seethe Fruit hanging from the trees in my Orchard? After buying scab trees for years, someone told me to buy of McCorraick at Monroe, Mich. I d.d &o and tho trees and fruit speak for themselves. Dbn't be pessimistic, plant McCor mick's trees and have a. sood incomes in your old age." McCormlck's Trees arc the result of years of experience, high-frrade soil and modern methods. Get V-helr Free Catalog and "Tree Talk." Trees, Shrubs, Plants, Vines Roses, etc. Mccormick nursery co. l24EUn Street, Monroe, Mich. Salesmen Wanted. i. F. HU H. I Corner Ttli & Jackson Sts HOME 'PHONE. Wm. A. Wilson General Insurance, and Loans. Farm r Loans at 5 per cent. Jasper, Ind. INK! INK! INK! Best Black Writing Ink. lc; per ounca. School children who brio ordinary writing ink bottlöi cü them" filled for one cent.Bmx Exj IJöjlxx v. Id Fftpers tht Courier offio? 5o par packact oikC

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