Jasper Weekly Courier, Volume 54, Number 31, Jasper, Dubois County, 10 May 1912 — Page 8

TL FabrIf7Ac"ctrcfol manner of m-kin Oniide an out;, tM fjtmt-lity of ntyle and all otter point, of construction in "Viktaf and "Viking System" Clothes

instant favor witt tnoic who are looking for .tyle and icnric.

- t J. J- ,aCturCl tv Becker, Mayer & Co., Chi'cagoi

fermort maker, of CIÜ.W., Boy." and "Young Men. Clotlnntf. W guarantee tkem in every retpect. TLfc iakcli tell.

THEOWLY WAY. To conduct ecsucssf uy any business enter prise is to have adequate telephone facilities furnished by the Cumberland Telephone & Telegraph Company. Service unexcelled ; long distance connections to every important city and town in the United States, prompt, courteous, efficient service. Call our manager for information, ect.

Cumberland Telephone & Telegraph Co. Incorporated.

Prank, Fearless and Free,

Jasper Courier.

An Jbdepteflent Democratic JiTewBpaper that aayB wHafft pleases without asking your permission.

The Ben 91 Doane Job Printorium is nexcelled-or Tine Commercial printiDg. ' '- JASPEE, IND.

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Äarcartlc.

There is a certain Wirmington business man, of a rather iraggish disposition, who contends that- his vife has no imagination. At dinner one night he chanced to mention i tragic circumstance he had read in the evening paper on his -way home. A passenger on a transatlantic steamer had fallen overboard in midocean, and he had never been seen again. "Was he drowned?" asked his wife. "Of course not," answered the irrepressible hubby, "but he sprained his ankle, I ' believe." Argonaut. 4 Just Her Habit. - A widower was being married' for the fourth -time recently. During the ceremony one of the guests is gurprised to hear violent sobs proceeding from a woman in a corner of the church. "Who is that lady who is crying bo bitterly?" he asks of the 'bystanders. "Oh, it's only Martha, our cook," answers one of the bridegroom's children. "She always blubbers when papa gets married!" LouQor Mail. v Ought to Ce Thankful. "Doctor," growled the patien! "it seems to me that -t.uOO i a hi charge for that operation oLipe.. It didnt take vou over half ü min ute." " ' "My dear sir," replied the fa momspecialist, "in learning to porfonr that operation in half a minute have spoiled over eleven pet ks o inch eyes as yours." S.ii ver.- Ma izine. fTo Meant Well.

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A Favorite t Court.

"At the reception today his majesty honored me by graciously singling mi out to speak to me in person! His majesty tapped me 011 the cheek and said, "Are you here, too, you old numskull?" You can Imagine, Adelheld, how envious all the other were! Si mplicissimus (Munich). Sht Ftlt For Him. He had sat looking absentminddly out of the train window for two hours, whistling the tama tune and not on the key. The passengers had hecome well nigh districted.

A well known actress sat behind

;the young man. Finally there came

a -moment when the whistler paused for breath, and in that moment the quick witted actress leaned over and said: "I know just how it is. I never could whistle either." Ladieti Home Journal.

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Birold Will you take xuy seat, lady) -Ally Sloper.

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The asoner on the Pullman car took in the situation. at a glance and did exactly what the train robber told them to do. At the points of his guns he relieved them of their valuables. But af .the sight of one woman he paused with a start. "Who "re von, woman?" he demanded. "I," she rjunvered, "am Miss Fay de Fluflie, the well known actress. Here are mv jewels. Take them all!" The hold 'p held up his head proudly. iCNo' lie replied; rT may he 1

robber, bni I no press acronf

Keen vo;ir wealth!1

Plain Dealer.

The Marve's 0' Gcicr.cc.

Amateur Hypnotist See, I make the passes one two three. Now try to B tep back. You, can't do It! Plck-Me-

Nearly Througn. A stranger entered a church in the middle of the sermon and seated himself in the back pew. After awhile he began to fidget. Leaning over to the white haired man at his aide, evidently an old member of the congregation, he whispered: "How long has he been preaching?" "Thirty or forty years, I think' the old man answered. cl don't know exactly." 'TU stay then," decided the stranger. "He must be nearly done' Everybody's Mgxrgsn-.

Woman's Rights. "Madam, do you believe in wom

an's rights?" asked the man standing in the car. I do," she replied shortly.

"Excuse me, he went on. 'T am

but an ignorant male seeking light.

May I ask if you construe these fights to include the privilege of ipreading your really becoming akirta over three seats ?" Thereupon she condensed herself, he took a seat, and conversation flagged. Philadelphia Ledger. For Hlnu

Promotes Digestion.CheeirFurness andEestContains neither Opium3forphiie norfifjraL IS ox Narcotic,

A perfect Remedy f or Coasting lion, Sour Stomach, Diarrhoea Worms Convulsions Jcveristu ness and Loss OF SLEEP. wHMMMS lSBw-w-wwaw. Facsimile Signature of NEW YORK.

Always Bought

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Thirty Years CASTOR I A TMS CMT-Ww NMNIir. NCW YR IT.'

"And how's buslneß, Mr. CnvT

"Oh, thkgs are looking Uttfe g-fscfnl." Tatler.

AnOId Story. Dnce when Eudyard Kiplinjr

a boy he ran out on the yardarm of a ship. "Mr. Kipling," yelled a sailor, your boy is on a yardarm, and if he lets go he'll drown !" A&, responded Mr. Kipling, with a yawn, "but he won't let go P' This incident also happened to John Burns, Horace Walpole, Napoleon Bonaparte, Dick Turpir Jnlina Caesar and the Kaia McTooki. Presently it will ''happtn" again. London Aiunrera. Exaiperailnj. Prom the dark kitchen there emanated a series of thumps and angry exclamations. Jones wai lookuig for the cat. "Pa!" called the torn ftor the stairway. "Go to bed and let me alonaP blurted Jones. "I've just barked my shins." "Pa!" insisted Tommy after a moment's silence. "Well, what is it ? Didn't I tell you to keep quiet ?" "I I didn't hear your shim bark." And the next moment Tommy was being pursued by an angry sire with 1 hard hairbrush. Chicago Newa.

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LAMPERT & BOCKELMAN

General Merchandise.

Shoes and Clothing, Goods, Notions, Staple Fancy Groceries.

Dry and

Country Produce Wanted! Give he a Call. Both Phones. Free Delivery. West Sixth Street.

JASPER, - IND.

o Way's Unf ort unat DslayHe was five yeai3 old. On thia articular day mother had dressed im with unusual care and was rery

much displeased to have bim come in with clothing dirty and torn. She had so often told him h must take his own part in the boys' scraps fight should the occasion demand it. This he would not do. And now she intended to punish him. Bob became very indignant and aid, "Well, mamma, I just told the boy I wasn't ready to fight,- and when I got ready he waa aettin' on Delineator.

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THE OLD EXCUSES

"There's no hurry," "I can wait a. little longer for my insurance" have left many a family to face a bitter fight with pov-1 erty and privation. If there is one thing that should receive the first consideration of married N men, it is LIFE INSURANCE. : Now is the time to apply for; a ,',K)licy. ArchlC. Doane Jasper : Indiana!

Jasper Roller Mills

ESTABLlSHEM4r

Mak the Celebrated P ATOKA IjILY FLOUB j Best Grade in tne State ef Indiana, They Also Want 1 our WHEAT ' ' And Day the Highest Market Price in Cash Flour and Shin Stuff for Sale at all times.

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AuEGKERT