Jasper Weekly Courier, Volume 54, Number 1, Jasper, Dubois County, 13 October 1911 — Page 8

At th Flood. Uoflrinp of ft ruunjr rivor t tho headwaters of tho Euphrates, with g falling barometor and indications of n flood in the valley, tho Pithecanthropus changed his mind nnd frankly admitted it to Noah. HU manner was that of a chastened and softened ponon. "'You monkeyed too long," said the patriarch. "Wo gave yo,u a chnnro lo come in with us, and you wouldn't take iL Now wo havo arranged for nil tho stock wo caro about trying to float." The general liquidation which fol. lowod hnd tho usual effect upon all but the insiders. Puck.

Redeeming Time. Dean Swift, when ho claimed the degree öl A. B., was o deficient as t obtain it m)r by "special favor," a Unn itscO : iK t ite lack of merit. Of this difegrnco he was ho aahamed that ho resolved to study eight hours a dny, and ho continued this j industry for seven years, with what I improvement is sufficiently known, j This part of hia hiatory deeorves to . bo remembered. It may, fays a : oommontor, afford useful odmoniLon to young men wlro, having lct I one part of life in idleness and I pleasure, are tompted to throw away

tho remainder of it.

Tkc Fabric,' tlie careful manner oraKn (Injuk MTout)?ti

ntüiV ef etyle aad aU other points ot comtrucuon m

Vikino'" and "Vikinfi' Svstem" ClÖt&S

" JV K fi'iartant W wft'tloM wloVe looking for tylc aad acrvlce. ,"ViUr brand arc manufactured by Becker, Mayer 'Co., C!ui, foremorf br of CMrenYBoy aad Young Mens Clothing. oaraatcc tbemjn fvcjapect.Tbe labels tell. .y.&am

: i. P.Waper j

1 elegrapher'a Cramp. An interesting feature of tcleg-

j rapher's cramp is that certain lcttors are nearly always the stumbling ; block. Tho most frequent are C land Y that is, tho code signals 'used for these letters. When a fender begins tö bo "conscious" about so common n letter as 0 his case soon becomes hopeless. Another form of cramp attacks tho receiver of tho message. It takes tho form of inaliüiy to write fust , enough to take down a message

quickly transmitted. Tins is easily understood when it is remembered that a receiver often has to write continuously to code dictation, so to speak, for hours nt a time, Thn strain involved is enormous and leads fairly commonly to what is practically a form of nervous breakdown. Dundee Advertiser.

WAGONS and

AREIAG-ES, i

-And Sealer In-

Agricultural Implement! and Fertilize.

General Repairing & Horse Shoeing 3

SÄ

North Main Street.

Jasper,

Ind.

Prize Offers from. Leading Manufacturers Book on patents. "Hints toinventors." "Inventions needed:" "Why some inventors Jail." Send rough; sketch; :or;rrtodel Jor search-of Patent Officeecords. Our Mr. Greeley'was formerly. Acting Commissioner of Patents, and as such hadjull charged the U. S. Patent Office,

GSEMT&M9INTIRE PATENTATTORNEYS

Washington;. X. Cw

THE ONLY WAY. To conduct successfully'any business enter prise is to have adequate telephone facilities furnished by the Cumberland Telephone & Telegraph Company. Service unexcelled ; long distance connections to every important city and town in the United States, prompt, courteous, efficient service. Call our manager for information, ect. CtiniborlniuIrclcpIioiicITolcgrnithCo S If Incorporated.

Fair, Fir-ank, Fearless and Free."', Jasper Courier. f ' An Independent Democratic Newepaper-that BiiyB J . t what it pleases -without asking your permiwion.-lSco' .0 , itx A $nf The Ben Ed Doano Job Prlntoriom is nwcolled for Fine Commercing printing. ' JASPER, INI).

It Was New to the Oishop. At an umisnnHv large dinner party, v.iiore the guest of honor' -was an English biahop, the butler, an elderly man, wu3 obliged to bring in from a friend's lon?e an inexperienced lad to ho'.;) Kim in the dining room. Tie -awkward helper annoyed tli" butler leyond onduranpa ith nüonfinos j'.s : h3 duties. Ue toajiatitu interminably until the butler, worn out and nervous, Raid ironically: "All you will noed to do is to stand belaid the bMiop's chair, and whonovcr hi lr.jj.hip puts down his glass yon hum reach over and wipe hie m.juIIi villi a napkin." That silenced his assistant. But the young man actually took tho order seriously, and as Foon as dinner began he stationed himself behind the bishop, waited till his lordship had drunk and put down his glass, and then, 03 deliberately as his nervousness wouldrmit, he opened out a largo napkin and wiped the dignified old gentleman's mouth 1

Pure Milk. "Ilnvo vou thrown tho cow into

! tho antiseptic tank?"

fYes." "Have you washed tho can with carbolic acid solution?" "I have." ITave you plunged into the genn destroying bath yourself?" "Certainly!" "All right. Qo ahead, now, ana tal-.tho cow into the airtight glas cage, but keep on tho lookout that no stray bacteria get into the milk." Bohemian. Grubworm ftftcea. An odd form of animal contest used to bo practiced by office clerks in London some years ago. It was known as grub racing, and nearly eveiy younger clerk had his stable of racers. These worms were bred in nuts or apples and carefully stabled between tw-i walnut shells. They were selected by placing them In the center of a piece of paper, and the ono that proved most adept in making a speedy bee line to the edgo of the paper was matched against the pick of a rival stable Some of the fastest could not bo induced -to travel in a straight line. In racing parlance, they bolted and were bad betting propositions. But when two camo together that showed a disposition to run straight and true tho betting on the result was lively enough to stir up the antigambling enthusiasts. New York Tribune.. Foozle Again.

prail p 1 PTfj jfl 1 1

UHO I UHiK

QTiiiiHnma

PiSTOfifil

ANtgclaWcPrcparalionror Assimilating UttFoodandBcßulating ihcStoaiacks andBowcls of

Generally.

r (lhsm

Promotes Digcslioit.CIieerrur-

nessandiest.eoiuains nelllter Onfüm.jrorplüio norJIincraL

A pcrfecl Remedy fo r Conslipanon, Sour SlomaclLDiarrhocA

AVorms .Convulsions .Fcverishr

juiss ond Loss of Sleet.

TacSlmiks Signature op NEW VORK.

Exact ocwf.orwK&aaiÄ)

For Infitntg and Children.

The Kind You Have Always Bough!

Bears the

Signature

JLf

Id Use

For Over

Thirty Years

OASTORIA TMt&rirrawii tomnni. rat Tens rrr.

Caddie to Foozle (who has slowly hacked his way to tho flrst hole) Wall fe be gon' the wholo round? Koozle Yes, oi course. Wy? Cadd'leOnly they'll '.IxVranttn the 13 tonwrrow. ' It'a meilfil'day. Tat-

Cuie For Suspicion.

Doleful Donald Some of my brightest thoughts come to mo when I am asleep. Thirsty Gits Troubled with lnsoa sla, ain't you? New York. MalL

The Disturbing Telephone. "The telcphono has destroyed all tho privacy of society' said tho society girl. "It breaks in on every, thing. Nothing is sacred to it. You may be saying your prayera. The telephone. Or in tho midst of your bath. The telephone. Or doing up your back hair or, worso of all, a delightful man may bo making love to you, when k-lin, k-ling, klingl The telephone breaks off the thread of Ids theme and ho failfto resume it." New York Preaa.

A Bad Story.

"Oh, no; I can never trust my husband again. I feel convinced he 1 rarrylng on with tho cook." "What makes you think that?" "Last night be klsfled me In the lark." Fliecende Blatter.

The Truthful Child.

A zneaturlnff worm Went out ono day To measure uTatt Of pUM. II measured a eklrt For A b!r llttlo boy, And uw.btff lltU bor

Auntie (upon her return, to somewhat pessimistic nophow) Did Tommy play with you while I was out, darling? He didn't mako you cry? Is'ephow Ho mndo mo cry a little bit. i Tommy Oh, Philip, I adayouUUjii mrly all the tlrao.Bwtkjr-wm Mi - :

LAMPERT & BOGKELMAN

General Merchandise.

Shoes and Clothing, Dry Goods, Notions, Staple and Fancy Groceries. Gauntry Produce TSTantEd! BivE us a Call.

Both Phones. Free Delivery. f West Sixth Street.

JASPER,

INQ

THE OLD EXCUSES, "There's no hurry," "I can wait a little longer for my insurance" have left many a family to face a bitter fight with poverty and privation. If there is one thing that should receive, the first consideration öf married men, it is LIFE INSURANCE. Now is the time to apply for a policy. ArchC. Doane Jasper Indiana

Jasper Roller Mills-

ESTABLISHED?

C,Vvr

Make the Celebrated PATOKA LILY FliOtJfl Best Gkade in tne State of Indiana, C hey Also Want If our WHEAT"

lad Dav the Higheit Market Price in Cm

Slour and ShiDBiufffir falt at all time.