Jasper Weekly Courier, Volume 43, Number 46, Jasper, Dubois County, 19 July 1901 — Page 1

"WeeKly QTmifirf. VOL. 43 JASPER. INDIANA. FRIDAY. JULY 19, 1901. NO. 46

BttMiiyan kvkry hup y at jasnmiMlKli ArJAS

PBB, UUBOIICOUWTY, INDIANA, BY CLEMENT DOANE. OFFICE. IbCoubjcb Builoinq Oik Wwn St x i h Brain. PRICE Of HITB8CBIPTION I't f MTf St Numbers, Postpaid, 9 1.60, s!i wtei t in- in pioporttoa. K AT KS UK ADV K RT 81 NO. I nr ltral advertisements legal rales; io lines gl .00 for iirnt linrrtlnii ; flftr each wbasqusnl iMsruon. I ,i resrly advertiaemenUi liliernl contracts will In- made to regular iilvcr UOMMEBC1 l. AND JOB WORK Of all Kinds Promptly ami Neatly si . ited at USBJUL 1'kk kh, We invits i iis't i iii iiml business. PROFESSIONAL CARDS. K, M. MII.HCRN. M A. BWBBNST. MIliBUBS & SWEENEY. At torneys at Law, JASPER, INDIANA. will praetlea tot Coarti t iutifi ni Jioinina Contta. rurticulur att tloa u M '' "li' tMiim. tf-Ot WCB -! s.. oppoult! tli i halt i i 1 1 .otiik. I M.S. Vi. M t W. Ill NTKK. COX&HUITBR. - Attorneys at Is aW IMD ivhi .tvi I 11 M . . . ........ a

u .1; j.t 1 1 1 1 . - .11 1 -iiurii 111 unuoia nu ..vv. . - j j - ilHoinijtKwnnti, 1 -!iitinH ana i'riiiute'cia-g There are oiie- practitioners

.'Ü-Lh-iim .,.i.t.,.s.,.rlnf nrnminenee who hold thnt Jih-o-

1 & w . . 1 1 ii) lor. it .r Tryior. . . - i HA 1 LOK & THAI I Arn, I Attorneys at Law, JASPER. INDIANA. win prscttee la the CoatM f iuiiiii ef . , Ii IHK ni nii.. . iffli . ,, ,-r leiliols County Mutt' lltum fim, 2. MB : 10 11 h i-iihit. II. M. hh.VV FISHER & KEAN, Ättarneya at Law, J AS PBB, INDIANA Will praettoe la tbs Ooarta of Dnbola and COUtltlM. ! I it 1 tit t .-ii t ion glTM 1 1 1 l.lli.'ll t Ol l-tlltl Hill il I t um. oillre 111 piivil BalldlSS, 'VIT hriiK-ti n-. w -t I'UtrHiii )-. Barak i.ioo BRUNO BUETTNER, Attorney at Law, And Notary Public. .IASIT.lt, INDIANA. W ill pructio.' in the Courts of IhiIkiI and Perry ooaatiaa, ludiaint. Jan. wh. OPERATIVE DENTIST, JASPER, - INDIANA. 88.00 scr of reeTH. ma. 00 loll, CroWV .ml Hri.l-rc irk 0M Killlnit a v; Saltr. Imtnt mmttmm Isias wllBHal irtb i work f in-.ti1.nl T""rni Kea.oii.lil Olflr. rornrr tli ami Clay tr t, MMrt of Trmav tavepB. n-tunt liiw lj DENTISTR Y 1H. it. il. MOSHV, Resident Dentist, UUNTINOIIUUO, IIMI. Tradsn bit profo-mioiiHi aawtasa to hii 1 1 " k ai.y work in thi' ili-iit. il Inn-, anil irotaiMM to kit- it iii-i etoaeai attention. U IK plate work npi'clnlly olU-itctl, an-l all work warranted. Apr. 1, 'tt. Money to Loan Bt 5 Per Cent. Wm, A. Wilson, JASPZR. INDIANA, ". 12, BWy, L17KRY AND Sill STABLE. FEED. VOLLMER, MMN STRKKT, JllBOrt 1 11(1 Always have ti e best turnout-, of BBf variety for i iiMtoiner ; partieiihirly eom-ni'-rnal travelera. Courteous and careW Iriverato all parta of DuIkmk and adj 'ining eoiintiea. Horse hoarded and ulil on cheap terms. Oct U, ISHN.-ly

W HTM flOI MMN VY I . U. OULU IV1 IN.

OOBDQCTSO Bl mks. M. l.. BOBBS. ALCOHOL FROM A PHYSICIAN'S STANDPOINT.

A Talk Given in Trinily Church South niUfwd ,n,m Vw J ,,rk' ,n, voung men indicate plainly a lark l,H' n.Vxt IIour .'lam. but It U BodtvilUitnHiü onvf ,ati in with i high official of,;, pical training. motSi.2Tfl T i'"1 "ff" n B Bend, by J. w. M.H.g.n. M. D. tfae Krie railroad be learned that 1 elaim to hate no tradea.r f. 0 th'-m to do .t. Conpin considering the Question ol el- the Indianapolis Southern project is jn tne8e b tim(.s w.ien t(l(rfl ia a luentljr, the stories ot in organ is oobol from the stand point ol the looked udoo with such disfavor that ,i...., ., , ' i. -v oro jon lo try to defeat Henderson, ara

. I. ..... 1 I . t I . t j.iijnt' i.iii, nun ickaun to.: Ml' .Uli Ol one recalls the uream ol .1- III'! lJ .

um v.u iinf .icui imuiK f. uvu i" iiimmiii. i uc i.nc invi.ii i.- j (?o when the OflOM WBB coinfie caw in his vision I mighty image, reported to have -aid that fie had Injtted. Evil associates lead to had part line gold, part potter' clay, recently talked to President Caa-'u-uij. ' while it is not claimed

do i see in me iiiesuo,i oi eiconot, soinetl.ini' ol L'ooiJ, much l evil ; it is part fine g'ild, part liter's day. i-eiy ii.-i'ii ii may jirovc a ministering angel to lift a man up; imKieelvuaed. it will aseurrdl v -Drove a devil to dra him down mm A question so lompiex as this ia natuiallv consideied by different in

dividuals from widely divergent men, and this is said to have been points of view. There are ardent the reason for failures) heretofore to admirers who Bee in it nothing but finance the project. The opposigood; it ll good when you are sick, of the Pennsylvania would make good when you are well; good when the scheme too risky to be you're -ad, good when you're hap- bonded, is the story in a nut-hell, py ; good when you are home, and Should the road be built, the Penfill you are going away from home, sylvania is preparing to compete in have it with you in case of the every way in its power, and thiemergency that is considered all too will make inveetors wary Indi-

Irequently to have arisen. On the other hand there are those who see I . . 1 B m in it notiiing whatever 01 good; 10 these it is evil entirely. Siirnewhere between t'iese two ex- ' " trpmps tjind the nuiiorifv of nlivj-i hoi has no place of value in the materia medica, but these are jn the hWIiUd linnritv and kv no m,.fin rcnri'Mpnt tin- euii-en-11s of oninion jamong physicians in general. Neither does this view represent the ti.ni'li i nwu of ninwt i Ii v-.ii 1I1 ui sfw of j.-ji v.u........- v. ....... .... ..I.W...-, -. o I'hp cause of ternoera.ice rest - un - v "" ' w g- g on a foundation so broad, upon indisputable I hat it needs no apol ogy from any one. It has no cause to fear the truth, or the mostsearch ing scrutiny. PIim .1111J of t .miner. jm . .1 . r ance is not advanced oy lntemper- ... . .... ance in statement. 1 ne reiormation of the race must come about not so much ttirougn tue emotions

. . 1 .1 . .1 . .1 -11 .t : i.- ... . . 1. . . .

as irirouKii tue uiiruen, tut in,(MM, ,,f ...-j fliri,i

tne conscience, r rum wi ...., .. ,enced to twenty years in the Nethen from without, must this change penitentiary, is, after serving till . l.lui'A U I'lM it lliW-l I f III-. . ..

TT. . ... . . night to banish irom an the land every form i aiconoi, intemperance riii . in various forms would continue tomorrow oecause m tue tuirainm iedency towards intemperance that exists deep in many natures. I nwisely used alcohol h a means f destruction, of death; scientific - ally used, it h a valuable stimulant, and under certain conditions a food food more e.-isilv SMliaiilstsd. l .f . i :.. i . .

j 1 i ne nisi iiiiviTaoic im-imJ in me worm . . more readily converted into energy, mn Umso aaflering from Dyspepsie end R,lorlo7w, than any other of which we have Uver oom plaint. More than seventyknowledge; for the vital forces may gve pereeat, oi the i people ija ths Unittd M , r . i i . i .1 . .i Stats are allhrted w l th these t w o ill-- -'n''-, be at such alow ebb that there is ,.aiIt.H anil thl.ir : m-h as -,u Hid, Leither time BOT the ability to elab- dtoiiiach, fii k neadaebe, habitual OOS-jOood, orate by th- process of digestion or- Uvsaess, palpitsttoo of Um heart, lieartdinary food and convert it into en- ha, wuu-r-i.r.i-b ,gnawiaffand baraing J . , , .. , . pains at the pit of tin- sto-nacli, vellow ,

ergy. unuer hwm reu-, i i t u........ mJ f.., t , o ii in aiconoi, ir i nu-c in mo .....I .. .. in a form to be absorbed and COn verted into force without undergoing i, f i t ...i i . digestion, is m loo- o. wmHHim value, l o illustrate : Suppose a steamer in the river above Niagara Falls. She is well equipped with engines, boilers, and all necessary machinery; for some reason the steam has been allowed 1 'Ii ' I A A - to sink to a dangerousiy low point, and it is discovered that unless something is immediately done the current will bear her on to the rapids and inevitably tu destruction, The encines nre there, ready to reun,.. il lo Htram : the boilers are

ready to convert the water into are between 16 and 80 JTCBW and steam; the bunkers are full of coal have been sentenced to prison, ready to be transformed into en- A f-hort study wai made of the er(,yl,ut there is no lim ! Sup- laut o(X inmates receive ! up to and pose for our illustration there are in including May ol, 1901. The facts the hohl large tanks ot gas piped brought out are said t verify those ready to the furnaces; it is turned of previous investigations in a sinkon, and instantly the boilers are ing way. wrapped in a roaring, Heething It is generally recognized that the Maine. Almost immediately the family relatione of over half of the steam pressure begins to mount, inmates of our reformatory institu the engines feel the force, and slow- lions have been disturbed. One or ly the current that was bearing it to both parents are dead or they live destruction is OVefCOOe, and the apart. They youth-, have been de vessel makes her way up to safe prived of home training. The larg and plat id waters. iest proportion are notably deficient But on her way through the lakes in education. Of the ÖOh) studied,

thev do not continue to use gas uni, kt.1. nronrp nt ths risk of burning out the boilers, aud wreck - int thfl entire vessel : thev ao back . .1 I lo rofti ' LTo be continued next weea.j

The Indianapolis Southern Must Not Be

i,uin. 7a) wassail, ..... ... It BOH believed tlr it the I,,!tnspolii Sunt' era Uro) will not be built. It cannot be lina-iced the ! . , , An Inditnanoltl man has lust . . ..... I . i . . .11 .1 Ia, ifc i ll.iw tuii-i-nii 'I j.w.-.-nn. i"i a it u not conniuered . L . f Wl HI. f .1. sau, oi urn renaayivania rauroau, and tln.t ( assatt his declareil that ih- indianapolie noutbera must not in- uuiti. 11 wouui luienens inn much with the buaioess of the I. & V, and Louisville diviaiona of the ..a ehn- 1 vaiua The fennsi Ivania's attitude toward the proposed road in well understood anions financial anapous sun. McLaunn s Price. The republicans are welcome to 8 nator M uirin. Any member . 01 Congress who . 1 " -u . roh d or will vote f il II III'" Iur 'aina ship suti.-idy mil is , lh(, QOt needed by the Democrat-- Or MMt Republicans either f r that matt-r. Hanna and the ship trust have got him. and if the price STBS high they gBVB more than the goods worth, Ex. In s Dilemma. .... . ..... .. What aie the IP puiilicans going What 10 uu j. :.l v .l.. and I ith bone 1 wnen I Im ( ilii n j L.'..f 11. t Itaiti . ,ii' 11 I, .1 t t in. ' Hnnff Ihawm nan. rea tir mumm n n n n 1 v . , , 1 1 . . . 1 t , . t 1 . , . , 1 , . j ,i 1 " -' ,r"-r-"U1U .1 m U1 u,.uf u" -i un 11 Tl.. nciti' 1 im 11 1 j !""' t 1 1 i - ' 1 Ml M I I.HI) I jM mvX Qh Hartley, reputi ican treas the state of Nebraska, who mmm i. it, vii'fml of . 1 1 1 1 I i n c nl.lhl . ...- . - . v. . - . ... . p, , , OOO of the state t and sen - .tour year-- and one mouth, now rears and one mouth, now a fror mnn h.-ivino- boon leird inpil .. . 1 iin ..... at . Mnuii.,n 'Ii a-'vii 1 in- 1 - 1 1 1 1 (iovernori.f Nebraska. Duiinfl his entirfl t(,nn in j, , hp earoed u,( , ()(M, fl (Jood wages that am eAsy work, for the big repuh )kau t (.,erk jh üw n,. 00 ,,,, N. A rer (iootl Atlvici'. , . . . i . . .i . ... ., . i , Hnil disaaveeable . . ' ..i . . i la-iie in tin iiioiiin, i o.iini); up n um.hi after eating, los spirits, etc. Qo to your! dnmpst and get a bottleof Aasnsl Rower for lo Cents. I we doses w ill relieve 9oa Trv it- (iel ,ir,.,.m. priz,. A iiianae. Mrrtin Frieilnian. June Bt, tHOQeow. front the btata Board ot Charities On Education and Crime. The Secretary of the Indiana Boatd of Slate Charities presenter to the National Kducational Association at Detroit, some interesting statements regarding some of the detects ol the inmates ot the Indiana Reformatory ut Jeffereoaville. That institution receives those males who bb or Id J percent, are reported as .-it-. . . . - - . l i m illiterate zoiorooj percent, nau not reached the Ith grade in the public schools, and D-Ut 26 OT ft.2 a l J at Iii. 1.. : a I I per cent, have reached the high 'rhnnl M2 nf all noted were nativea

q. of iUit.'mlkrried, Hko you paps, won't If"

'iat V wa .-sn in llicne by aliuuM , a t.r m.,nU(.r ,ia,

i i . . , , pissed tin- i lementary school work. )u (h, (,Mtr:trV) a HiKhtlv less pro ) (rtiIlat, ,mini,,r ,al r,'!l(.ll(,i tll, ,; ,i, .i.i The itooplng inoulde, awkward ormu ,i '... j.i; .,. VI-.IIJi.il. twi ''irii ii, ' ' , lr Cellt htUt' tlieV WeT tlnemj ,;( noM shown were the loe shown were uic cause oi relation-hip lo it crmif it is Interesting to note theii 312 or 62 I .57 1 oi 7 I S pei per cent. Use liquor. cent, smoke cigarettes 109 or 81 8 per cent. n-e tobacco in some form.

th0v have not been to anv verv areatl00111171 -lendt'rs"n fav,,rs tariff re-

On the contrary it is shown that " xte.l,;l..o 1111 I liiof,- 111 o uciii -- nun are . ..aidercd helpful. Many have: been deprived of proper home inlluences. Js'i or öi.'J per cent have not attended Sunday School. Only one of the five hundred examined claimed to have b longed to the V. 11. C, A. The offenses of these p ireoni may be classified as crimes against persons and crimes against property. Tf ii i : 1 1... uaon tltot V V liijr iiunt fi I l will ct,n uia: -ii,wv. j i . . t 11 1 .u- 1 ' ,1 . mem mn turner tue iiittei cut--. .. . il ji .-... ... t 11 01 or uu'cocu umi uicic ' - , . , 1 , ft - , , ,6 . . VOUUK men. 1 ney m :k nome uaiuj B . . . . . . , , . ... I 11 I I 1 im 11 11 liliti.l.Mi In. ill .S, ... ,u-i IIa..,,..,-, (-.-. ... wan , ing and manLaUra.ning. I he lack 01 renin nts training na- aiso oeen noted. With the light we have, the great need i- f r the prevention of crime, Efforts in that direction will be most fiuitful. "An ounce of prevention is worth a pjund of cure." When the school, the church and the home shall fully understand the L ets and the urgent need for renewed effort ft OQ1 every line that niav is-n)Iv -vmei v j j i j be tnad to save the bovs and girls the ik?ure? will have a dinerent storv to tei. The followina are some of the re- - suits shown by the investigation. Statistics of last 5(X) persons received at Indiana Reformatory up to June I, 1901 : Edoi atios. Illiterate, 66 I3.2p Not reached Ith grade, 261 '.- High school only, 26 5.2 Of above iH born in Ind., 282 0, Illiterate, 7 S 13 6 l 6 Not rea bed 1th grade, 123 High self ol only, 13 Trapks. Have no trades, 406 Have trades, '.'I Km f 0YMBBT. Not employed when s 2 l- 8 crime committed, -- 50.4 49.6 248 AaaoctA nu. 419 83.8 Bl 16.2 None. Habits, Use of liquor. drink, 188 V7A l)n .,, I'o not Drink in iderately, öS. 4 Drink exce-si velv . 'Jn 4 62. 1 Drink Total 312 Cl AKKTTKS. Smoke, 374 Do not, 126 Tobacco, 74 OR Chew and -moke. Chew only, Smoke only, 313 62.6 34 6 8 62 12.4 1'se tobacco Total Do not use tobacco, 109 ;i si s 18 2 Sl'NP A Y S. !HOOL, 2 I 286 Have attended. Have t ot attended, Y. M C. Member, Not members, 07. A. 1 199 9'J.S Cl.ASSIKKW HON OK CKIMK. Crimes ag'nst pers'ns, 60 12 M Crimes ag'nstprop'tv HO 11 Kindly Yisitor " Mrs. A., whit do you suppose makes you Bttffsf so?" Mrs. A. "I don't know, I'm sure, ind I believe nothing but a noHt-mortem will ever show." k'indlv Yisitor-" You noorthine! You aro so weak you could never - - . - - . m stand that!" Tit-Bits. (I t .1.-.Sa , ii mn jt nni'np mine . 1 M 1 1 1 1 1 1 ' ' ' ' 1 1 " 1 1 iiv vi i ii v t rupt any one when they are speaking." . ... "Well. I'll have to when I'm

from Qmr Kaguter Dorm- .) UANIIIVCmW I.RTTRB

ww Vi' ash im mm Ii r Int i -. 'in ' ""' D ( 1 Jul 1"' there a.- number of republicans, some of them i mimnent, W,J V!!''1 t,,i,r,'v''"t.l,'e1eN ' , of Dave Henderson, speaker ol . , . .... . i Iii i i.i l.i.i.i I . . . t , t . i i . . . . t nioon.-hine. I'ohticians do not

knowingly butt their headi against ' While chocolate ai.d ginger ale -tone walls. If there were even a give a .iger liko effect to the halaie rt fighting Chance to beat Henderson, of the garments in which he m the ti'iit would be inad, hut a proudly decked. there isn't, the men w ho dislike him His hair is limp and languid, and most are likely to Iih found shout die parted pquare and true ing the loudest for his nomination Above the center ol his note, by acclamation, in ord r that they wfiirh turncth blue,

ujai noi i.- r i i n iii'll 111 u si. , :. ,T' , ,, .I... ..... .... . . ..... .. i..... .... ... . not ue lett out when he disiriuuiea me commiii' e 11111111.1. rerf.... 't 1,1 u 1 1. " .-villi c .-011, aim on fill uc 1,1, - 1 - - Iii ii äoiy u.jcs qui go mm otr usuepre - Mutative Baboock, but what his personal opinions are, will not affect the result, as he hat a record showing that there ll never any difficulty of his being completely controlled by the party b leSBB. That is one reason why hi- re-election wai ae--ured before the adjournment of the la-t congreea. measure aid I he bosses know his, do not care to take ... :ny chances with a new man. . ,. .. . . I As to immediate nationul issues, . r-i 1 r ..u. . .hm. . sr. nauiDwu, oi.ia., saiu : 1 ue republican-! seem to be divided on .. . 1' the oue.-tion of tariff revision and 1 the a(( m ) treaties. am q. u it mut come sooner or late. I am opposed to trusts and I believe that the only way to kill the trusts is to' pam a revenue tariff. Havemeyer says that the tardt is the mother ol trusts, and he ought to be good authority. I he charges against the collector of internal revenue at Louisville,

Ky., of having viol ited the Civil out of style. Service law. together with the epin I But, ah, alas, my i-on, sometimes ion of the Civil Service commission he feeleth very bad, and then is that the evidence sustains the when the ladies come with garments charges, have been referred to Mr. rich and glad. McKinley. As it id well known' The ladies (ill the rockers at d the that the violations of law, of which door ways and the stools, and inaist there il no doubt, were instigated by 'upon a liquid thai both elevates aud the republican bosses in Kentucky, cools. Inder ordinary circumstances Mr. And one declareth that she'd like McKinley would not deem it ad-'sorae chocolate with cream, and, visable to take any action that could when he draweth it, straightway be regarded as a rebuke tothem,i"Oh, not" the maid doth scream, but rumor says the circumstances! And then. he voweth that she in this case are no! ordinary, and hath already changed her mind, thai there is concealed therein aiand wanteth just a phosphate with plot, which involves the election of a piece of lemon rind, a successor to Senator Deboe. Ac- And, then, again the other maids cording to this rumor Mr. McKin-ldeclaie they do not know just what

ley is being urged to take advantage of these charges to remove Col lector Sapp, and to appoint in bill place J. A. Craft, a former demo crat, ami a i irt of the plot is that i ol. R. W. Knott, editor of the Louisville Post- who professes to be a democrat, but who supported Mc Kinley in lS'.XJ and in 1900. and w ho is now supporting the adminis tration policy, -s to be sent to the Senate as an administration senator by the combined votes of admin is tration democrats and republicans As the story is told in Washington t ol. Knott pledges hunselt to grt or.ough of bis kind of democrats elected to the Kentucky legi-laturt to make a majority with the repuh a ii lit a i icans aiip'd. remaps when the - j story becomes known in Kentucky, t he democrats will be able to maki it impossible for Col. Knott to earn out his part of the plot, even if Mr. McKinley agrees to become a party to it. U. A. S. Rice Caramel Pudding. vVash one scant cup of rice thor oughly and soak it in cold water for one hour, drain off all the water, put the rice int) a double boiler with a ge.ierous ip.iart of milk, one teaspoonful ot salt and one stick of ein namon and cook it until tender, then a Id two well-beaten eggs. Put two thirds of a cup of sugar into a frying pan and stir constantly until it browns ami becomes liquid; pour at once into a pudding mold, turn ing it rapidly in order to thoroughly coat it, pack in the rice, stand tht mold in a pan of hot water and bak for one-half hour. Serve with car amel BMnoe. The mold should bt l-ced in the pan that the hot water can run fr.-ely beneath it Pupil "Where is Atoms?" Teacher "You mean Athens, Johnnie. It is in Greece. " Pupil "No, I don't I mean Athens. I mean Atonn, the place people g-d blown to in bvler explo sions." Baltimore World.

The Soda I onntain Clerk. Cossider now the meek and hoot Ub MOB fountain clerk, Who draweth off Ifie inol.-tened air with nimhl tin n and jerk.

Ili garb ll always f pot left wfiite v ben lirst fie put it on. But, lo, before an bow bath paeeed Iti tpot)eeeneai bath gore. For then he hath vanilla on the boaojn Of his vest, and streak- of red raspberry make Iiis troupers seem a jest. l.n au-e he hath to lmer in the i. ..''.ii.. iin-i I .j i m in uuu the ice. to fix un funny mixtures for the one that hath the ,ir;,.0 ; p.. v.-,. ; u iuiu BinuiBO IXHHXKilWI ill the line of fancy drinks, and all the II . .1 .1 . while he watches for persuasive sorts of winks, From early morn he twisteth at the soda water spout, and turneth the ice crusher till the ice has given out. He diggeth in the ice cream and he rusheth with the glass, while his deadly hated rival buys the soda for the lass. 1 ea Verily, the soda cleik, he U .. . I. .. . 1 uuu u -01 ry iiiub, ior ue iuui niiun the way to get nine cents out of t ach Jt... dime. And he must be a hustler, that L, m rf or water, or he'll tremble at the boss. How often, oh, how often hath the soda jerker grinned at the one w no p tye'ti nickels lor a penny s worth of wind; How often, oh, how often dot ti a calm and peaceful smile go Hitting o'er his v.sag when a drink g tf thev wish and on and on their mild objection- B.OW. The weary soda fountain clerk suggesteth this and that, from plain old lemon phosphate to a dose ol anti-fat. And finally the ladies fair with one consent conclude that chocolate and cream shall be their sodafountain food. Now when he draweth all the drinks, his trouble ara not done Nay. verily, ray trusting child, they are but half begun ! For each and every maiden tl re loth straightway rise and say : "Now, girls, I'll think it I awful if you do not let me pay!" And all protest, and all object, and all their plans defend. And not one takes out her purse her lovely cash to st end. Now, finally the soda clerk suggesteth that each maid shall pay for what she drank and then beginneth the tirade. For all the ladies vow in wrathyea, they almost sob that they will his employer see, and take from him his job. And then they take their parasols, and sternly go away, and not a cent of all that bill do they take tt ps to pay. The LPntle soda fountain clerk, he falleth in a da.e, and leanath on the vichy tube, and wicked things he says. Is this not true, just a-i we have composed it, with much work? It surely is and if you doubt, go isk the soda clerk. Baltimore American. A Diy of Rest. How thankful we should he for me day's rest in seven. All we bave to do on the Sabbath is split the wood, light the lire, dress the children, feed the mule, read the paper, figure up how much we've lost during the past week and then no cheerfully to meeting. Vtlants Constitution.