Jasper Weekly Courier, Volume 27, Number 27, Jasper, Dubois County, 24 April 1885 — Page 7

.WEEKLY COyitfEK.

O. DOANOC, XMabllMlwr. jasper. INMANA THE MODEL YOUNQ MAN. ' man: femur man: A lover of truth. Ane a worOty-of-truiU young- man. Jpntiicnt, UiMtrt'WtjyeHHK whh; A'fMy hihI iwttt young man; Is haIihiikhI to I hi wn k . rAlMt HNirreUtlHK,)OUH9 MS, rf fM rt " HOi H iMXWtf Ml, ptHBtl J OUHff HMH, Nor hm vverrotuantio young wan; r "And m heftHMHiTOeir yuutiK wan. A HHeMoal, "idaJra yeunjc man) ' flo-uae-lor-aoane young man; No Hilly- "lia, lm," .. jfyorauutw olV'ak," But a shrewd, common-wnso young man. A truly ambition young man; No Immoral or vIcftHirtymiiig in an. Not h reader oft ttmU, NettUur liaaty nor rash, Hut a oalui, eqaeldaraU) young man. ' An affair, Mart young man; A noble, rottntxl young wan; . A Hr, Meady eye, That inmna ,cl will try," A nevor-wlll-fail young wan. n Alwava.fmiiul.flt.lita.ntnnft vnunv tnant Kerer-bohMit'tUMTRcu young man; No haughty, vain looks, Itut a lover of books, And a thoughtful and studious young nan. t vNereMJ0ft-the-',weed" yoHHg man; . A Goon Tt-malarlndeed young man; I ,-jt A nrs t(HHH'J'iK)" When-lnvtetl-to-go To-nlaee-of-evll young man. An ohlfcrlnf. jKillte young imb; And a kfwwnsr-riglit young man, A quiet, demure, A gentle and pure. An alwayB-respoeted young man A fiure-WRiiofml young wan. , ' And a JHt-wit.we-iHMd young man; v Is never nrorane. Nor too giedy of gain. Yet a frugal. Industrious young uiaa. A haua-good-imme young man , A free-frum-all blanieyouug man; Is nuoli In demand All over the land, Hut a ra rel y-U be-ro u nd young man. An honetlywoolng young wan; rAnd a weaH-what Ho'mlolng young man; Is faithful ami true ' Alaal Uuit so few Should be fiend like this model young man. T. 0. ChiftuAm, in LmtlwHlc CmrUr-JournaL THE COMPOTE OF APPLES. a! King Taught by His Quean How to Form a. Good Cabinet. There was once a King, but I do not know of what, for history is always so tiresome about questions and answers that I have noyur dared to inquire. The only thing that I do know is that ho was oallcd Porico, and that lie had married a certain Mari-Castana, and also that he passed hi life thinking how bo could fornt a good Cabinet of officers, and saying, whon every ono turned out worse than the last: "It is enough to make ray nose swollen!" Mari-Castana, the Quoen, was famous cook and looked upon polities with indifference. In those days there were none of those intimate relations between politics and dining, for, like oilier barbarians, the people had sever thought of a very simple thing: to fortify the heart it is enough to fortify the stomach, ibt neighbor, and half a glass k enough to Kindle a patriotic glow. His wife's indiftoronco to jralitios troubled King Perico groatly. and such discHssiong as these were quite common between th,ejr Majesties: "Do you know, wife, I think I see new wuonn vary our course" "But it is varied overv dav." "Yoh are mistaken; it has never been varied. "Was there ever suck a forsretfnl man! Anybody would think I never took any pains not to have the same course at tamo two day in succo ion!" "But, wife; 'it was of other courses I was speaking" "Why, how am I to got you others when everything in the market is as high as the clouds, and I do not know how I am to lay hold of a thing." "flow you run ont With your absurd fancy for oook'ng you mix up things in the strangest" "Ne, I don't There k no fault to he found in the things I mix:. No King, be he King of what lie may, ever eat a better mixed salad thau that you have just eaten." "Woman, listen to me and do not aooreh " "Do ypu, presume to pay that there Was anything scorched on the breakfasttable tab morning?" "I hare not said anything of the kind. But I will say this: that there Is no talking any sense with you, and I hall leave you before my nose becomes swollen." And the squabble ended by the King's going to his private room to bury himeelf in political affairs, while tho Queen hurried to the kitchen to see if the soup ceded skimming. Those altercations afforded King renoo some very lively moments. He was feeling of his nose one mo-nlngand finding it, aalio thought, a little swollen, he made up his mind .to forbid the Qttoen -formally from entering the kitefcen; but an unexpected event changed the appearance of affairs and wAeeqneuUy proved that he had been ttttetwken in hk symptoms. As the King rarely left the palaoe and Wt Queen weut ont to market verv

mornlniT, all ptitkui add rawed te their

MajMtlw naturally fell into the liaaan of the Quen: One morning, while she naa . inc iMtifmarKWi caeafHmiwr MN price of a oodRh, a ragged hW iroaened her ana reeneewUly h mni mt a peUtkm and ImwedkUely ran away. The neper oontatned thee werde: "Your lliehneas The exnoneat hi a faithful subject to your Majesty, and as a proof of it, now out of eflice, for your Majesty's perfldlotM advisers have oloarwl liim out to put in a donkey out of one of their own families. So after that he thinks it his duty to let yoer Majenty know that yeur Majesty's truaeherous Minifters are ttreparlag a great pie as a present; ami Ite says no more, for lie who has a good understanding, etc" "What impudeaee) what audacity! what iniquity!" exclaimed Queen MariCastana, angrily, on reading it "To think there should he any one in the palace who should attemntto make a ..t. f I. il A wnuu uiai is my speotauy; niaiany one should attempt to make uaatry after Uio receipt of my most noble glory. The King shall know of it directly, aild if hto Majesty doe not haHg th!e traitors the instant he, la read it, we shall know the reason why," , Aud the Queen began to run toward the nalacc, more angry at even step. Torioo!" sho caned ont to 'her husband, "read, read this paper and see whatyour perlkiiousi advisers are planning. Hang them instantly; have no mercy, or ewe l'will put corrosive sublimate In your soup iustead of salt" King Perico had his suspicions that the piu mentioned ill the paper would be loss easy of digestion than the Quoun's, and began investigations with that prudence and sagacity which affairs of state require. The result proved that the object of hk Ministers was nothing lees than his destruction. The traitors were arrested and sentenced to death. Finding no, mercy in the King, whof-e nose was for the first time in his life really swollen, the conspirators sought the Queen. On learning that they were guilUc.; of tryiug to rival her in what she did with such perfection, she interceded for them so efficaciously with her august spouse that his anger was appeased. "Well." said the King to hie wife, "since you have given them your word, I grant them their live and am content with banishine them. I must oonfeag that to you alone belong) the art of making pastry." in e iueen was so ia.pirea upon hearing this eulogy that from that day may be dated the delietens of the vol-au-vent. "Just think," said King Perico to h-msclf, "from what a deuce of a catastrophe my wife's taste for cooking lias saved me. But for that she would have wrapped the codfish up in the petition, and I should never have known what those sharjiers were about It must be granted that Providence does not act blindly. Our august spouse must be permitted to exercise the talent God lias given her, Bt how, by the mass, am I to free myself from the crowd of rogues aronnd me. The had corrupt thq good, and the corruption 8cciii3 to be spreading at such a rate that in a few years I do not see how thore can be an honest public servant I am to blame for being such a coward. But mercy! my nose iS swollen to-day in good earnest!" The King's disgust at the corruption of his officers went on increasing, and in the same rath) increased the Queen's affection for the culinary art. Now and then the King wished this love of cooking at the deuce, but as a rule he did not object and sometimes even praised it, remembering the pie and thinking that Heaven probably know what it was about in giving such a talent to the Quef a. News reached the court one day that the King of Jauja, an ally and relative of Perico, was about to pay him a visit The joy of Queen Mari-Castana wae unbounded at the opportunity to display her culinary talents to advantage. "Whatever they may say, it is we who are to entertain tlte King of Jau'a, where they eat and drink and never work," exclaimed the Queen, jumping for joy, like a child. "Sneh a judge as he must be is just what I need, to he appreciated, for my merit is not understood by common palates like my angust spouse's. I must find out what are hie Majesty's favorite dishes, eren if it costs me tune and money." Aud the. Queen, in fact, seat her own confidential attendant Gaohano, to Jauja on this important mission; but day after day went by, no Gachano returned although summoned. Another attendant wae sent and, at IaM, a third, but all remained in the eame extraordinary manner. Then there was nothing for it but to tell the King and see if he could explain the affair. "What does itmean?" said theKing. "It means that in Jauja they oat and drink and never work." "But these scamps ought to remember that I am their Qneen." "All they remembered wae that the stomach i queen of all." " r hope it will be their ruin." ' Now, my dear, don't be excited. I will give private instruction to my plenipotentiary in Jauja so that he will send me full information as to the dishee whioh my august ally prefers." King Perico wae as good as his word, and a few days later received a dienateh announcing that the farorite dwh of his Jaujian Majesty was a compote of apples. Now apples were very rare in King Period's demleiene. But a haekatfn. was inally obtained, and the Qusen looked them nn eerefnlly dwm eeUar,

net of the wayef their greats

me eniMim. The Km of Jiukat iiutarrfvid.iad iUumiaalio, heJl-Aghm aadkieeiag of And anrofKM of hand kk4ar. it mav here be remarked that 'the eenrtkrn shoved eaeh ether aside to Use Am Queen's hand, and then would Uck their ifH, to often had she a hand kt seme dainty dish or other. The eve of the great fcaaqaet to be given to hhi Janjism Majesty, the King was in his feted poederbtg over two things irst, how to form a goed Cabinet, and .eeond, how to coeoude with the King of Jauja a treaty for the extradition of edminsk, in 'whiefc it wae to be stipulated, to avoid trouble at home, that the criminals arrested should he hung and all. While be was deep in these weighty considerations, who should appear but the Queen, crying like a calf and tearing her hair out by Mamtfttk. "Oh! Perico of my soul, we are lost." "Well, what is the matter now" "O! Such a nvstortatae." "Two hundrml tbofieand demenel Tell me before I go mad!" "My apple! I found them all rotten!" "Pretty thing to come to use about! Throw them to the pig." "How wicked to sey sneh a thing." "Woman, do not "enrage me or my nose will swell " And $o Mving, the King opened the door for the (teesi, who went ont crying inconsolably, for her hope of giory had depended upon the compote of afH ples. King Perico was so much occupied with grave affaire of state that ho never once thought cf his wife's disappointment and the next day at dinner time was surfHied to see hef appear perfectly serun?. or rather, I may say, gay and. complacent Tne great banquet wae began. TheKing of Jama's eyes sparkled with Joy at the sight of the first dkh. "L am afraid your Majesty will have little appetite tor our dishes after those of Jauja," said King Periee, "since in point of rood eating Janja bears away the palm"" "Your Majesty is in error. In Jauja we suffer toniHHLs when we eat." "But man aKve. don't they say that every bod) eats and drintcs and noeody works." "Perfectly tme." "Then I don't understand" "Heavens! How dull vour Majesty is! As nobody works in Jauja. everything "Oh. I see. Your Malestv ie risrht. It never occurred to me. tor a war time 1 have been revolvieg a plan for abolishing all work m my domains, bat 1 see now, n 1 wonkl suppress woric, everything would be on its back.1' "Jnt as It is in Jauja." "Yu surprise me! lint why do you not labor to restore it there?"" "Because I do not work, nebedv works there." "Apropos of projeeto and works of .Nate, l wien your .Majesty woumi unite with me in a treaty for the extradition of criminals." "I do not find it mooavenient Will your Majesty m?ntion the terms of the treaty." --The one I lay the most upon is that any of my subjects arrested shall be executed and all." "That can not be, my friend." "And why sot?" "Why, we do not work ie Jauja." "But that would only be play." While this and similar conversation went on, the King of Jnuia eat hike a cormorant while the Queen swelled with pride, and was wild to say that she was the author of the dainties which his Majesty found so much to hisjiking. but he restrained herself until there sttould he a fitting opportunity to drop her incognita This opportunity was afbrded by the appearance at a table of a magnificent compote of apples, which brought from King Perico a cry of astonfehmeut and from the King of Jauja a cry of greediness. And opening and shntihtg his eyes, the King of Jauja deroured a platoful of the compote and prepared to devour another. "It would "that the compote does not dtflplraie your Majesty." "How could it dhwlsaw It is enough to make oe eat one's fingers! I never eat anything h delicious is my life. Is it the thing to ask if we may knew the maker, the author'" "The author," said the Qneen. faint with cmetion. ' hi We servant" "Bravo! bravo!" cried the. King of Jauja,. with, his mouth fulL "How the deuce did yeur Mnjestv ever succeed fat making any thing so dellcieup? "L wltt give your majesty, the reeeipe, so that your august spouse" "Do not take the trouble, your Majesty; nehedy works in Jaaja.? ieternmted the guest helping himself to k third plateful of, the compote, and unbuttoning his waistonni for greater ease. The banquet ended gaily, and whilst the King ef Jauja withdrew to hie apartment to rest, the Queen withdrew to hers with pride beyond that- of a Qneen. The King ef Jauja took his leave the following morning, after kissing the Queen's Imnd and lieklng hie lips over It like everybody else, and requesting for i-efreshmeHW to hfe oumey what remained ef the eomneto el apples. -'But look here," said King Perico to his wife, "how could you succeed in making that eempete after what yen told me?" "WeU, veu knew, ef anurse, bewerer rotten a huehel ef apples may be, them are alwars seme Nwt fcavn part

WhLkL mfvlMMPir enishsaJsMn IM tfit lsmAsMsV IndnAa.

it gmml corruption So I et C all tsWsssmsW inAlisBBs4 IftfcglMMI wlftli. tlml sjr I1 fcisljliimni" eaie and need theen te make the delieious compote wikdi ban jfahtndsuek a brilliant triumph for mm.r "And wnsvt no you no wan tne tteeayed pieee?" ac onee as re fase.' . "Well! ac last I heo mr way elear and I am going to try h I ant as good a hand at my woric as you at a' eem poto." "'The foltowiag day Khng Periee appeared with his nose swelled like: a tomato, and neata: aewsr his suneeui separateil the fen Sotted ones from the many corrupt ones ami made With tne sound a naert eaceihmt compete ef Minister, Generals; Seers tarhM and Judges, eta. and threw out the others as refuse. I beg all tbe leading papers to reprint this story at every Min'ttorial eris ts. and above all I would request our mighty ruiern to take'lhe grestost earn in making the compote and, be snre and net put the rotten bite in the compose nor throw out as refuse the sound pteees. TrmntUtUd from Uc sk Jr tkt Motion Jeurnef. WHIPS. A Dealer Talk About ThoiM Me AiJtHeU t a IJrii'i-r' Out St. "What k the latest thing in whips?" asked a Tribune reporter yesterday, as be entered tbe ofttee of n weH-knwn manwfsctnrer in West Thirty-third street. "Well English holly hokfo Hs own yet," replied the' maker ef seourges. "Knglish holly c yew, with a light huh. For gentleman's whip to go with a dog-cart this is a very neat thiag," holding up a whip whose stock was of native whalebeee. potfshed and mottled, witfa an ebony handle and gold mounting. That wilt eost you about $35. Here's a neat one for about tw'ee the money. Not se much gokl on. it but the handle is a species of basket work, formed of whalebone interwoven. The highest priced whips run up to $160 or f 125. They are sticks which nature has shaped to the hand, c rabbit sticks, as they are called bv the trade. This is a four-in-hand -whip, a holly stick, whh a sixteen-foot lash of horsehide." "Isn'tthis what the novelists would call tire irony of fate, to whip an animal with a Jash made from the skia of his own species?" asked the reporter. "Yes, 1 4ppoe so; hut all lashe are made of horse-hide now. Buckskia ie about played out" "How long since the old style whalebone whip went out of fashion?" "Well that's bnrtl to sav. Yen see. the change was gradual. I got the first AMiTLAW fUlaAllt. k. 1 til.. cuse. To fill" it I got every one there was in New York just three and I wouldn't pick 'em up to-day, if I saw them lying in the street, they were so big and elumsy. Malaeoa'eane and whaage w-h-a-n-g-e yes, that's right are used a good ileal" now. In them you get length and strength wkh lightA rood whin of Enclish holly or yew ceste about six dollars. Those things that you are looking at hn the ease are aglhh hunting crooks. No man who respects himself will hn seen on horseback without on a- This loop of white kid on the end is the keeper. When an Englishman rides to the hounds be has a kmg kh attached to the keeper with which he punishes tbe hounds when necessary. As there are no bounds in Broadway or in tlte park we dispense with the lash but retain the keeper. The hunting crook has altogether token tbe place of the riding whip, which is now only used by ladies. The highest priced riding whip we have made fa sixty years of business eost S55." Before going the reporter was shewn through the factory, where were whips in nil stages of preparation. In one? comer was a machine which upon turning the crank moves a weansore inn tricate than that of the fates. Thk furcovering whip. These are formed by gluing: four pieces of wood about a long strip ef whalebone., The whole is then, worked ttawn to the requisite sine and taper, after which it b put through the covering machine and comes out a full fiedged whip. A. J JWeuns. A Theater Party. was entered, into by two young men, well known m society, to peel their issues and give a theater party. It was agreed that one should get the a sate and provide, for taking the party to and from the theater, and the other was to give the supper at the Bellevue. A coin was tossed up, and the winner of the choice selected the theater tkketo as his share of the cost Thirty young; people were kvited, and one ef tbe season's brides secured to mAtrenhsa the aJah. The party met at her restuencc. and, to their amazement, were) taken to the Arch Street Opera House, where a scratch company k singing popular light opera, the price ef admission bewg a dime, reserved orchestra chairs ten cents extra. The man who had ordered the supper was furious at first, but the rot of the party took the joke in the proper war, and He seem joined ht the laugh. The performance) was voted most amusmg. The thktrtwo seats coot 96.40; ear fare, 96.1; total, fl3.lt. The supper end of tho hill aeneontoute abort fmfftftMgftJyLsY ICnAinst

mununmnnnmnnnm

PCMOMAL AMD M. Feston, reeenelf elected Ttee President of the New York Lnho Krie A Weetorn KnUway, k only thirty, one years old. 4 Colonel InfewoM was asked to mM1 the secrets ef oratory, and sohlt "Ose small words to express the idea and be sure that the Me overlaps the word at both ends." "As you grow in art" said Genu a a to a young poet 'you wHl judge the great masters of the past as I now judge the great musicians of fan mac times. At your age I used to say: 'If at tweaty-n vs I sum, I and Mosart;' a forty, 'Moaart and L Now 1 .ear Mouwt " i A hook.M soon to he published entitled "Tbe First Families of the United Status," wealth being the dotermmmg consideration. The "trouble with such a book will be the necessity for a mvision every time there U an important fall in stocks. There should be an appendix for tho Canadian exiles. Vttrrmt. Tbe smartest magaaine ey published k said to be the Musical Amwfs Jy of London. Its sum k 8 br H, inches. It has been reduced, to 'these dimensions by phototype, and the eontento includes several musical pagos. The reproduction k exquisitely done; but tbe most tiny of the type, infinitely smaller than any ever cast can only he read by the aid of a magnifying glass. "The death of Mrs. Yulee, she wife M ex-Senator Yulee, who represented Florida in the United States Senate before the war, closes a singular career," ays the Atlanta CemlUtUieH, She was of a distinguished Kentucky family, and reigned as a social beauty. Yulee, an ungainly young man, sought her hand, when she laughingly replied that, when Senator Yulee presented tbe suit, she would consent He went at once to Florid, and was forgotten by the beauty. It was not long until he won -1ms prise, and no one was more surprised than the lady herself when the Florida Senntor claimed tbe fulfillment ef her promise." Tbe oldest and happiest married couple in the State of Kentucky are Dr. and Mrs. J. G. Chinn, of Lexington. Mrs. Chinn k ninetv-ehrht years ef age and her husband ninety-four. They were married six years ago, and are as lover-like in their home attain ae married folks generally are at forty. ;Dr. Chinn k an eloquent orator, and as the last meeting of the Mex can veterans fairly eclipsed many of the youeger speakers with an address of an hour and forty minutes' dub&tion, which was afterward published ha full in several hale and hearty, asd so k hk good wife. Ckict$o Tijtm. HUMOROUS. The Literary World proposes a : word, "Hterarian," to describe a perse devoted to literary pursuits. Whether the editarian and educaiarian will favor the suggestion of the innovatarian remains to be Norrid&vfH Bermkt. Fogg "Brownington k having a hard time of it Ue lost hi leg, yon jwmin, jam m bnu ow, um avn mo has had to have hk foot amputetedt" Fenderson "So? Hope, 'twasn't the foot on the ether kg; that would be very serious." efe Trmcrift. An old lady was viewing the exposed stock of some burnt-out dry-geede store on Market street a few days ago. The hurat-edjsed bales were all strew across Lite sidewalk. Above was a sign, "Another Sacrifice." "Another sacrifice," said the old lady. "Yes, burnt offerings!" Sqk iraJtcisee Chronicle A boy took a walk with hk father en Washington street, FrovWecee, and as they were pawing the Insane Retreat the so asked: "rather, why don't we ever see any faces at the window when we walk by tbe Retreat?" ' Because, my son," replied the parent, " their heads are turned." Gott Chtr. "Nellie, let's you and I play inventor?" Sew shall ws do it Tommy?" "Why, yoUjbe the inventor and Gha and get some eookks out of tho r, and Irll be the capitalist and come along and eat them ail." Jmt what wnl I get out of it?" "Why, yeu'M get nil the fame. I'll tell mamma rt was yon' who took the eookies." Cwweye A'ems. if A newspaper man who, writes th ohtenary notices and financial articles, went into a restaurant the other dav while suffering from a severe osUL When the waiter handed him the" menu he said: "Here, you have made a mistake." The waiter looked perplexed, "Yen have put the carte before the henrse," explained the newspaper man, and the waiter immediately struck for higher wages. And no wonder! JYerrismiCH Iternid. "Now." said Wylie. "there's a horse as k a horse. Why, Jhat fellow beat Maud S. once. " Ceme, new, that won't da" -"I tell it's n fact, I was driving along one day, when I saw Maud S. ahead of me. Now, for it, I says, and gave, the hey the bit. Well, sir, 1 passed the crack trotter in half a minute." " Honest?" honest but then Maud S. wan going the other way." WeurA rsfcfrsp. WfJ olnMl t4l H 1 llMMMM 1rV ljPH AnA huirt tbe ItH ef: the Whet Tbreuffti forets of tneThH. t Into the inner coast4eueaM We traefc the erarw Wlrre; WtMoarthe ltee teugn an heard The Mrgo la hk kir. Wnh tasses of the brain we esti r The tsneas of the Was. JWI lH SiMJ HJf neWt 1rVMMW9tJ iMMMtMS nLHfllc lNP4Mi tMISMC We enesh the sttfesri- y"hm hart: 'rtah W-fintesk tHi TllliBHM noH am np asnoovft nwsTFsnww ra n nwew a sny imwo v wee mm uvsr eenu . ,

-