Jasper Weekly Courier, Volume 27, Number 13, Jasper, Dubois County, 16 January 1885 — Page 7

WEEKLY COURIER, C. IXMlSCK. I'uWWImr. JASPER. - IKPIAXA.

AN INTERCEPTED LETTER. Tmr letter at hand, aal I mvn, Tfee aww will ytm, w HuW, l( mm (Hi no rrxy ie.t ih wv. That I bavr eana-fet ttoaMur about. But art. I'm nil -" fwc Ue i.mmw: My evMaMw-a era nwrrebi ( art. DM tea up Im l He laudable tiiroe (K (riHriNr4K MVUlle fet-art. Tee aae. dear. I'va tamed twenty-seven. IVM P MMl ON t ltk it. Im iMir et ! am Ntt tn mm twenty. And I'm apoUn of 4itl im h blh. Haakw a wff when 1 apeak wf new draimea, Am! any Mie xmhimm Mttet o: Huh'T M at Una kept'Mn avtt'CMUoMx 1 receive trow tteweH wfeo don t Hop. Hwt what cnm I Jo? I'm a aaxtoM As any live woman mn I TW make l 'lift H'XU shol allMMM K Hir!o won.il fiiuch tatter atit mm) As atlo.e of !jm kind witk Him one: Dea't laugh. 1 ve jrowa deera:e. dear: Brawn. Swattfe. Joue or Ghmm even TotnfvI prefer te 04la" Cmmuhmw Devere.'I Tan reaaeaaljer tfee lonfC'feati-ed young GrTom UHMHrttt fefea lci -! -Wt, fee' fallen feeir to a 1 or tune And a IHifeedon. or ftonkJHC hh that. The yenaa- widow who was the entioa Of tke mawi. ha winter. J-iet tkink, fee JHd the UMM that 1 wanted. Ami mow fee ha take to driak. Tenaw HHnk baa eloped wkk Mis Tanner; Prank, tfee. lMk trkftrV, ta Menilc TFfl Mitowra at tae ChateiMi Sta Mttg, ntcjvmmn. f rou r, for a jmr. X m.tMn. th bair 4reer's ilauekter, Tfee fm'kW frjrtit. vh wlH neill, 'Wke mmkknI a fortutMj In lfcitoMl At tae Sereatii'a awi aaauat tuU, It t MM w4H ft SMrrlvd at Cariftma. 9e's thirty if mius l a day; Dwt eHure4 tfee calcfc of tfee '.) a, Tfee feaaIoMie vouik artist. Paul (Jnty; Ati fer I am wearlMir the wHlw, wfetie tfee fewn'' niri In my wt Are atuwn wc tfet-ir lora nimI tbeir outfita; It's Mmn to Hit oa In a 1 ww J wJU not wateXy sweetaeM Cr witfeor uiiptiK-lit-t: if all falls lH i4nip. in 4m r. with bar crMtetinat, A feaa4one wx-f rioter from Walvs. I have yeaehod. tfee end of wy fcr. And tfee eat of tav xxip: H fi late; Tfee h!H of liciMtJer I rownd me. Far tfee Ire feu burned low in the irrate. Tj'i, H T. me nHM. vary soon. ow irooa ntfffet. love: Tk nk often m k her h, m rear Of a fwtwna wafeleet by a feaebaa!. j,3rWaWa lanM? ftaWC mm tfee fact he a pAyuiaa "ft fBAr krIaaa 4n f .. arfa"Wi XS rf tHaan m Vflrfwljawa Jfajaaaar tWln TVOMISSLG DOCUMENTS. A. PmrIoind Marriage Certifloate aod h Stotoa Reoord. Ob a f4ory Satttrday afteraoon ia Jaaaary. 1829, the parah clerk at Moffat, m Dmfrks.hire, Scotland, was JigkUag the ltw in the vttry and the kkk to warm the httildiag: for the next day's services, when he observed that a vere. 4 ranker had entered and was attentively examining the large, okl-fashloned jHripk and preeentor k-ik. The stranger wore a low-erowned, broiUritttined hat, antl a large traveling Ctoaic wiut tnree or ionrinn)eneecape!. The high, fur-lined collar of the cloak wm np, so that little of the Granger's face conkl he seen. When he saw- the clerk He spoKe to him jHHitely, .ayiBg ke was on a jottrnej', ami, having to bait and rest his Itotvcs;, tlraught he wenld walk round ami what waf of intre4t. ObrTing the church tlooraiar, ke kad entered. He aked ttie clerk the name of the minister, the ex tent of the ran. and other quotum--. 1 ..I I ...! .. . tke iHtildinsr. Pointiag to an oicii door, he said he suppoWd thti vestrv was beyond. The clerk replied that it was, ami invited kirn to enter. "It is ehilly." lie said; "1 don't wonder at your making np such a rearing He stood with hie hack to the fire in tke vestry, and g.uted at tke room. "My word," ke sakl, rubbing his hands'. 4iow very eohl it is." Tken glancing .sideways with a smile at tke ckrk, be said: "I k.tye a flask J. prime French brandy in my ocket, ami. if it would not be sacrilege. I should like to take a sip ami atdc vou to join me." "T)eed sir." sakl th e clerk, fixing his eyes on tke stranger's hand as it drvw forth a bottki from the fohls of Ids doak; " 'deed, sir; it's no for me to say what's sacrilege and what's not; but this I ken tk.it tke minister hissel' takes a dmp in the vestry after sen-ice of a Sabbath." " That settles it," sakl the stranger, and ke took a long draught of the brandy ami banded the bottle to the clerk, who dkl likewise. AX OLD CHBST. After some further talk, tke stranger asked, pointing with his linger: "What is m that old chest over TWtder?" " That, sir." said the clerk, going to it and lifting tke IM, "ie where we keep tke record of marriages and "Ah, how interesting tliey innst lie," ke stranger said. " Here, take another ip. If you're not in a hurry I'll it right here by tke table and glance over ne of tke ntty record?, If you have a objection." " None in the world," said tke clerk, ml glanced toward the bottle. "Go and take a drink," the stranger said, " and I'll piek out a volume! and glance over it." The clerk keiped himself, ami the stranger lifted a strongly-botiml mannseript vobtma. "Good," ke said; "this. contains recnls of marriages from 171 down to lttl. It will do m well m any otker." Than be plaoed ken tke table, drew leeked evc kk akeekler, k turned leaf

after ir. reottu-Klag on the writing, the Malm of Un kk, the names f the perties nod jk forth. Then be took another sip from tk lM4t)e jmmI iitvitwl clerk to do tlw juimm. Tk Usrk bacaiiMi furruloti, xml bl fcomethinir to ta)I xbotit

tbk couple mwI tkftt UtrcttHMro t mrhm in im mKHtrr. aiiw a um th -tnuicr ekMnl tb book, mtorwl it to tbe cw!t ml hmv1 towsnl tb ctturch, tiwH tb m&I of wkiek Im wlk4 towiirU tbc tioor. As Uhv rea;bHl Ute jorelt the trfnr took Kkr it. Tfeew ke tutkkaly ex"By Gorce, I've lft my jjlovw in tk ve4ry! ller, titke th liMtk awl be)f yowrlf wkikil xkck for litem. " He ut tbe flask into the IiaimI of the ckrk juhI hatel up the able into the vestry. In half minute he retMniil, tokl the clerk he mijfht well emity the flak (which hedkl) ami thtm tiartel with a hearty shake of the ha ml. MK. GOIKKEV'S VISITpK. About teu days la'tr the same sstraager called oa Mr. Godfrey, a wellknown attorttey-at-law, of "UlrmiHg"My name," he hiUI, "w PalHer, of the law tirm of Weed, I'allister A Carew, of FHrnival's Inn, London. I am on my way to attend to some highly imKrtanl iMuine.Hd whieh will come before the northern k 'ircuit the coinmz spnnsr. antl the Earl of Warwick, who h a relative of mv client, reeommcndetl nte to e yott aid consult with you as a lawver emLnuntlv skilled in bin ebtfei of I bHine.-." " I Mr. Godfrey acknowledged the comraiment, add nz that he ha I had the honor to advi.-e the Earl of Warwick in matters of the nature referred to and his atlvice hau turneil cut to be Tamable ana jntlscKHts. Mr. l'alhcr ami Mr. tioufrey conreived for tome time, and then Air. Pallistcr complimented Mr. tjoltrev on ine adunrable order m which he kew nw o$cc, adding that, as for h's firm, they had given over attempting to keep an oniem omce. "-Now, I anppow," said 1'allis er. ;yon Know wiiere cveiy uoci raeni is neti away ami can reacn it a moraV , , n ...jhv... rery simple. Here w a register, yo

see. i tiyote so many pages to cacn .fa by ,i10 defendant with her htwclient, and every doenmeat relating to r ,,a1 cn purioiniKi and the record

uietrwi4iiNaw wemereawiui a- numoer of thg kfi oliureh of Moffat abappeadetl, which corrftiKntls to the stracted 3tWW Sni- T Shter was produced and U the number of the drawer. The ad- '!d bf c" , iL irt nf i.1 1 fclf nf rantageisthk: If I kept all t'arW The clerk told J O vfalt of documents together. I should have to Ji,e,f?" 1B hunt over all of litem ever)' time I g" tf, cff" " witar J wanLul . nrtwul- w Vow T look snie Prson to him, both swearing "Excellent." sakl Mr. PallHter. "jitst let me get the idea." and lie tttnnfd over ,M ( ?. r' , arias xs??S$ s nzs&sz iL 2KJr tll4? ,lefns mI admitted that he had Litf retained the firm hjs his attorney., and. JlTAtJ that Mibnently, wit'i his consent, Tilt LilTOK S Kl.TL K. vmiliu thn case An hour later, a me-eager came in co1""" u,e ca with a note from Mr. Pxllkter, asking , , " .ir 7 a,, Mr. Godfrev to come at once to the Hen t J. 8rn;,iaf h anil Chickens, Vk omitted an impor- Ji tlYilmtant matter. Mr. Godfrey at once iny',!!start!. He had left the houe only $U"FSSZi five minutes when a coach drove to the 1 fl" f, m5K" i, door, ami Mr. Palmer alighted. He ""1 troubIe- bhe iroJuo1 e sakl to tke clerk: ct.ru ncaie. "The moment I sent the letter, I saw The on and daughter of the dead howfoolfeh k was to wate so much minister f-woro it core their father s sg-

... i tmu Ilu cn mind nirhl korw i llu luiiw of catching Mr. Godfiey. It is too bad. I say. young man, eaa't you jump into lien and Chickens, and bring him right back?" "I see no reason why I shouldn't," $ahl the ckrk. ami in a 'minute he wa hastening after his master a fast as a pair of horses could carry him. Left alone, Mr. Pallister amuse'd himself by again examining the register, and seeing whether the numbers appended to the documents corrcsjiondcd with those on the drawers, ami whether the documents mj numbered were to be found in the sa.d drawers. Then he sat down ami waited, having first arranged the papers in a large leather pocket-book to his satisfaction. After Mr. Godfrey's arrival a few minutes sufficed to close the consultation for good. Mr. 'Pallister handed Mr. Godfrey another fee and then drove off. THE WIDOW AND I1ER SOfeT. Mrs. Caroline Thwaites was the widow of Thomas Thwaitee, of Apjieley Court, Warwickshire. Mr. Thwaites had been dead six montke, leaving hie widow and a son and heir, Charlea, aged fourteen. Mr. Thwaite kad greatly disappointed a younger broWior by nnexpectetlly, at the age of sixty, bringing home a wife, wliom he had picked upon the outskirts of a Scottiah moor, where, he went for the .shooting. Nobody knew who she was or wbenee she came, but she was lady-like and fond of her husband, and they lived happily together. Two moiKhs" after her husband's death she was notified that hi brother, George Thwaitos, claimed tke estate en the ground that she was not the lawful wife of the deceased, and that her son was illegitimate. She consulted her lawyer. Mr. Godfrey, of B.rmingbain, and left the matter in his hands. She handed him her certificate of marriage, and said: "There, keep it You are my friend, and it will be safer in your keeping than in mine." The lawyer subeqttntly wrote to George Thwaitea: "The certincate of the marriage of your late brother to Caroline MaeDopahl, at Moffat, Dumooneeire hew you nan bare any jt I gd ef onmplaiat," Then, Mr.

lime Tkwa'toi wrote baok a that he auiipojwtl if It wa m Mr.

fry jtUted ke wuet reet ooakat Ho thing tool. 0 Pehrtiary SO, 1399, Urn. Thwaltee wan ervwl with papers ia a aetioa in ejectment, wkerelH the illejritiiHHey of ker child wae fully set forth. As the inaUer wai to he ihmIhmI oh, nhe imntedtately ilirectetl her lawyer to prejMtra to tlefem'l the catwe. CKHTIKK'ATK AKI lUCCOHU MUMIXH. Mr, (olfrey consulted hi regwter; found the entry of the marriage certificate of Thomaa Thwaitea- and Caroline Thwakes, aaoartaiited UienumlMr of th) drawer and went- to it. Few paera were there, only half a donen. and the certificate was not one of them. Every box, every drawer, every nook and corner wa searched in vainthe marriage certificate could not lie found. Mr. Godfrey started by mail-coach to Carlisle, and thence jKMted to Mortal. He searched the records of the parish church, hut no record of the marriage wait to be found. He examined tlw book very carefully, and wm satisfied that the leaf coveiing the date of th marriage had been removed. He questioned the clerk, but to no iiurnose. The mlnfcter wm dead who. ottioiaied at the time, and no one knew tiro names of the witnesses, litre was a dilemma out of winch the lxwvcr coukl not see liw wav. The certiiicatj xone and the record destroyed, what was to I Hi donu? He stayed a week in Moffat and (-enrolled dilliarn(lv for tint w!tnraM. hut imnf could even " rememlKT the wedding. lie broke tlte facts to the widow as esv as he coukl. but it was a terrible shock to her. Her onlv chance of orovinsr the legitimacy of her jsoh was gone, and she would have to become an outcast, penn lew and despised, with a child on whom the brand of baseness would be fixed. Hie lawyer was still iudefatigable in his search for the miftsing uolmi meut, ami preintretl, as far as he wax able, for the approaching trial, jf COUKT. "When the time came the parties most ;BU;resteil in the 1)roCeelin were ikere. At tke proper moment counsel for th defenjsn brielly stated the facts of the marriage, and said lie would produce indubttible evidence of it, al though the certificate of marriage doliaiUR'. JlM IBUHini iiuiiumsuu wiu . ri'i .... . . n -: t i . twrpi M. 1 1 r 1, deaft went in'o the service of his daugh ter and tier husband. I hey witnessed tle marriage, and rcmemtered the cir-cura.-tances attending it, especially that the Englishman was very particular about having two ccrtitica cs one for himself and one for his wife. This en Jed the ca, and the jury found for the defendant. The learned Judge who presided cxprujsed regret that there was not proof sufficient to punish the conspirators, who had evidently u?ed the ba.4ost means to deprive a lawful wife and her innocent offspring of their rights. A KEMARK VKI.F. DKKAM. Not the least remarkable thing about this case is the, manner in which the fajt of tite two certificates was recalled to Mrs. Thwaites' reinerabrsnco. "The day I received the Information that the certificate and record were mi sing," said Mrs. Thwaites, "it affected me greatly, and when night came I could not sleep. At length I fell into a do;e, and had a remarkable dream. I saw the church at Moffat, anil thought myself there being married to my late husband. I saw the m'n'ster fill out the register, aud I signed it after my hmband. Then I suw the clergyman and two witncos sgn it. I stood by the tniuister while he made a copy of the register, and I heard my husband say: 'Let us all sign tbu document.' After that dono I saw my husband holding the certificate in his hand, and then a mist came over my sight and I heard a voice which sounded like my husband's, at a distance, say: 'ThU is a Scotch marriage, and trouble may come. I will take a certificate al o.' Then everything sevmed to fade away, and I thought I whs floating out to sea, and was looking in vain for a rope which I knew had been thrown to me. Again I heard my husband's voice, still mora indistinct, and as though he was struggling to be heard, crying out to me: 'To the left to the left' All passed away and I was awake. At once tke whole oeourrence in the oh area oante back to my mind. I arose, dressed and, precurieg a lamp, went te

tke atudy and aenrekad among my hwband'a wpent. Tka careh, however, wah in vain, whan the worda of my dream, Mo the left,' came ialomymind.

waa atamllmr at the time wHh my back to the fire-idaoe, ami inntinotively loekwl toward the left. Kight liefore me wati a liook-caae. I went toward it, ami my eye instantly fall on the old familiar llible, in a leather wrapwr, lying on a lower shelf. This Iwok was a WvclJne llible and the very first c 'ition iHiblblied. It had been in the family of my husband for four hundred years, and contained the records of the births, marriage and deaths ot lus an cestors and relatives. Die leather cover I carefully removed and ojiened the gaurcu volume. tMieets orpajer were jNuttod in the beginning, mostly containing records. On examiuiug I him, I came upon the very certilicaUi lor which I wag searching. There, spread out and lying next to the certificate of marriage of his father and mother, the precious document." Cincinnati Enquirer. CLEARING OFF TIMBER. A Work ef IhHhIIb Labor h4 I'reilltlott KxpeHftr. A few weeks ago, wearied witn my editorial duties, I lay my jm.'ii aside and went on a visit to my uncle, who owns a farm in a distant State. I am partial to rural life. Nothing would suit roe better than to own a farm in the country. I hardly think a farm in the city would do. The hor.e cars might rim over your cows and the policemen break into your corn-crib and steal your corn. Well, my uncle received me with open arms. Said he: "Panucnaj, those heavy editorials that you wrote me were creating such a profound sansation in Europe are wearing you out. Uettei look out, my boy, anil not tniin youi brain too much the top of your head may fly off some day." 1 enjoyed myself very much at Uncle Jim's. Nothing was too good for me at least 1 thought so and time slipcd away very pleasantly. As cold wcathei approached the bracing air seemed to fill me with a desire to exercise my muscles, sb one morning I remarked tc Uucle Jim: "Suy, haven't vou got sonic timber you want cleared off this winter? I'm an'excelluut chopper, and to see the chilis fly aud the giant oaks fall crash ing to the earth always fills one with unbounded delight. (Once, while in the army. I hacked down a few small cedars for firewood.) Uncle Jim immediately got mu an axe ami piloted me to the worst looking timber I had ever seen. Most of the trees were four feet in diameter, aud the undergrowth was afe thick as the hair on a dog. Besides, there was an intricate network of wild grajie vines woven in among the trees. Uncle Jim sn'd: "There, my boy, amuse yourself," and left me. After an hour's arduous toil I made a clearing around one of the largest oaks, spit on my hands and sailed in. I managed to get through thn bark after awhile, aud then sat down and gasped for breath. I know now why a man's ribs are built so substantially; iff to keep woodchopjiera' hcarto from jumping through their breasts and lxnincitig oft into the woods. When uight came'I hail made a hole in that tree about the siao of the first cut in a cheese, and I felt next morning as if I had been run over hy all the artillery and cavalry in the United States service. I was three days in felling that tree. I cut all around' the confounded thing and then tried to push it down, but it .stood there as firm as the proprietor of a one-price store. I went to the house and secretly got an old rip-saw, and tried that on awhile, but no go. Another hour's superhuman effort with the axe, however, made the stubborn old fellow topple and crack, and the next instant he fell with a crash that shook the earth from Maine to the Gulf of Mexico. It fell across a new eiglitrail fence and killed a cow that was grazing on the other side killed her as dead as a cove oyster. I then sat down on a stump and Shed the first solid tear I had shed in sixteen years. To think that I should toil and sweat and swear for three whole days just to knock fifty dollars out of my dear Uncle Jim's pocket! I went iorr wfully to the house, and when the old gentleman came in he said: "Well, how are you getting along?" " Got that big tree down."! replied, "which way did it fall?" asked Uncle Tim. "Downwards," I answered, " and smashed four panels of fencing and gave an old spotted cow such'a rap that her cud flew fifty feet There's nothing salable about her now but her hide and horns; de duct the price of those and .charge the rest to me. Uncle Jim sank into a chair, loaned his head .upon his hands, groaned dis mally, and sighed: "Poor Spot!" Aunt Susan covered hor face with her anron and sobbed: "Poor old Spotty!" The children also set up a wail of lamentation. I was forced to go into the kitchen aud take a rfraoke of the old man's tob.icco to hide my emotion. Presently he oame in and said: " Well, there's no use crying over spilled milk" (it was spilled milk in this in stance, sure enough): "yon oan go right or and clean on that limner, work the trunks up into cord-wood and fence rails ma the tops into nre-woou, and we 11 say no more about it" "No, Unole," 1 feelingly replied, " that would be too slight a remunera tion; you must receive a more generous reward. I'll send you my paper for twenty-five rears at two Hollars a veir." The next morning I esme home. There's a coo! sees new existing between uneie tJim dm me. ramem MUe, m Dsfreft Jfrse JYesc.

PERSONAL AND LITERARY, George Fraefc7TFk Mill Km ad writes poetry lor tke Xsw York pagan. N. Y. Sun. John Hakbertofl, author ef "Helen's Babies," is now maaafiag editor of the New York UtruUl. Both of Georgia's United S4Ws Senators have been preachers, Senate Brown as a Baptist, Senator Colquitt as a Methodist Verdi favors the lowering of the musical pitoh and the establishment of a uniform diapason for the entire musical world. -The wife of a prominent New York banker. Mi's. Henry Clews, has dk covered that the American lades do net read newspapers, and she proposes to start newsjaier clubs for tkem. I'Msdalpkia Iribune. Mr. and Mrs. Gardner Luther, et Swanxey, Mass., aged eighty-four and eighty-three years respectively, are m good health and able to walk two mils and husk com for their neighbors at four cents a bushel. Botlon Herald. John G. Whittier received two large birth-day cakes recectly, one of which was surrounded by seventy-seven

lighted candles. The Boston aigaschool girls sent the poet a basket of seventy-seven tea-roses. Boion Journot. II. H. Stoddard says that Haw thorne was never well paid, as litererary payment is understood now, even, in the fullness of his fame. He re members the novelist once showing him an offer from a publisher of $3 per printed page for a story. Chiwge herald, " Bishop G. T. Bedell, of tke Episcopal Diocese of Ohio, has ad-, dressed a letter to the (Mo Slate J&ar-, nal. of Columbus, ooagratulating it on. the fact that it does not publish a Sun-, day edition and subscribing for it as a token of appreciation of "this whols sorao reverence for the Lord's day." Judge Poland, the venerable Ver mont statesman, has s discarded tse light-brown suit which made suoh a stir in the House the first time be wore it last session, and gone back to the spike-tailed blue coat, ornamented with brass buttons, that he has worn ever since the time of the Wilmot Proviso. Troy Times. "Mark Twain." writes a friend, "is undoubtedly destined to be tlie rioliest made so much money in the same space of time as he has done. His wife lias a large estate, ana logeiner utey now have more than fl.OuO.OOO. He is a sharp business man, increasing his pile all tho time by good investments as well as by new books and lectures, and as he is still on the right side of fifty be will probably turn his present million into other millions before he dies." HUMOROUS. A sweeping viotory When yoa get the servant to handle the broom aueoessfully, U&ai&n foet. "Robbie," said the visitor kindly, "have you any little brothers and atstorsP" "No. replies wee Bobble, solcJmnlv, "I'm all the ohiidrsn wa ve got" "If you don't keep out of this yard you'll oa'tch it," said a woman to a boy in West Lynn. "All right," answered the yainin. "I wouldn't have come in if I'd known your folks had it" Lyn Item. "Mamma," said a little girl, "I th'tik I've got ammonia. You mustn't say ammonia, dear; yon must say pneumonia. "But it isn't new, fori think I had it yesterday." II ortm Courier. "How do you braid your hair so nicely?" queried a gentleman who was visiting a lady-friend. "Oh," broke in lier enfant terrible sister, "she takes it off and t'es the knot to the gas chandelier and fusses over two hours every morning." AT. Y. .Herald. "No, ma'am!" exclaimed the prtvoked young man to a young lady, who, on the refusal of her favorite, had asked him to accompany her to a party: "I don't play second fiddle to any oae!" "No one asked you to play second fiddle," replied the girl, with a smile; "I only asked you to be my bean." 394ton Union. "Pap, is Queen Victoria's other name Liae?" "No, mv son, why do you ask?" "Why, you" know Shakespeare was an Englishman, and I've just heard von reading where be says: 'Uneasy Liae, tke head that wears the crown,' and Victoria wears tke erowa, doesn't she?" Oil City Derrick. Much Adioux About Sioux: There was ayouna- woman aataeS Skuur, Whose na mane an awful ad tour At Hearing- her marriage Te tfee ftToom of hkt earrla, Hat fee's simmering dowa te a aweex. I'd rather she'd wedded a dlouxed Or a man wit whom I'd a Seuxed; Hut I'm atad, all the same. ' She's at last changed her name" Ami 'tis here tfee old bestjwatolHitad I "Some people," said Mrs. Sharpmale, "measure love by gold. I measure it by its quality." " measure it by quantity," said mpek little Mr. Sharpmale, in feeble tones. "I measure it by the iKick." "By the peck, yon lunatic; what do you mean by that?" "By the hen-peck," he gurgled, hoarsely, and then all the rest of the night he wished he hadn't said it BurdeUe. Everybody knows how thb midden cessation of n thundering Iwnd of mnsle causes remarks to be shouted out ia a toae like a locomotive whistle. The other night at a hop the band crushed out a few final bars and suddenly stepped, when the voice of a lovely little thing in pink was heard rcrsamiag at the top ef her "knrst "Don't my bottle haagnkjely?" C'Xisefs Trttwos.