Jasper Republican, Volume 1, Number 43, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 9 July 1875 — Prisoner and Attorney. [ARTICLE]

Prisoner and Attorney.

The Melbourne Argue tells the following very good story: A gentleman of the legal profession at one of the great mining centers, having spent a gaudy season at a leading hotel, found the fresh air too much for him. Instead of reaching the bosom of his family he gravitated to the lock-up, with the much-needed assistance of a servant of the Queen in full uniform. The lock-up-keeper didn’t know him, and consequently couldn’t send for his Mends to bail him out, as is frequently done by those tender-hearted officers of justice. So he was allowed to sleep until seven in the morning, when he was aroused and asked his name, which he promptly said was “Johnson.” He obtained soap, water, and clothes-brush, and was refreshed by a cup of tea. He then proposed to the lock-up keeper that the official should walk beside him to the Police court. When the time came this was done, and, by keeping the officer in earnest converse, it appeared as though the lawyer was engaged in some business before the court, and when the name of Johnson was called he calmly rose and said: “I appear for the prisoner, your Worship.” “ What!” said the Police Magistrate, “do you deny that he was drunk?” “Oh, no,” he replied, “he was very drunk, but is very sorry for it.” “ Five shillings, or six hours’ imprisonment,” said the Police Magistrate. “ I will pay his fine myself,” said this ready-witted gentleman, who in this instance showed that the man who is his own lawyer hasn’t always a fool for his client.

A boy got his grandfather’s gun and loaded it, hut was afraid to fire; he, however, liked the fun of loading, and so put in another charge, but was still afraid to fire. He kept on charging, but without firing, until he got six charges in the old piece. His grandmother, learning his temerity, smartly reproved him, and grasping the old Continental discharged it. The result was tremendous, throwing the old lady on her back. She prompUv struggled to regain her feet, but the boy cried out: “Lie still, granny; there are five more charges to go off yet.”