Jasper County Democrat, Volume 23, Number 78, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 25 December 1920 — THAT FOOT & MOUTH BANQUET [ARTICLE]

THAT FOOT & MOUTH BANQUET

is where we pal Rensselaer’s spot ball team on the back ani kick Mo roeco a little lowpr down-It took Morocco a year to make us mad; end’ll take ’em another year over it. M. had td eat wdrdMj and that's about all R. wW have tfi eat at the banquet, Anybody that ain’t bad supper, can' ask for a' change of menu. M. said* we didn’t have no team. Anyhow/ we still got the money we bet on' 'em. Btggeqt mistake they made was to pay the lb f in ad va»ce. Haven’t seen anything Mr. Gilroy in Rensselaer visiting friepds. v He’ll probably be h® re none s Of these days. That bird that raves about fermented fodder has thrown a smoke screen over our literary dreams. '' He says our stuff beVer makes nobody mad because nobody reads it .

He didn't dare take his girl to the game; he's got one in Morocco, too. As Doug Fairbanks says. It’s h— to be Maryed. "Lefty Bud” changed clothes three times and missed the first act last Saturday night. The banquet hein’ a stag, he’ll get there in time to say grace. Idea of tryin’ tc teed a football player on two dollars st the H. C. L. Still, they eat raw meat and drink blood. Guess two dollars would line two live cows up against them at market prices. M. is busy already gettin’ up alibis for their defeat next year. M. paper said a game would decide which team was the best. Now they say it didn’t A lot of fellows wanted their money back after the game. I don’t mean their gate money. M. manager said he couldn’t find R. on the map. We found M. alright, but there was nobody home.

They think their Q. B. was "fixed.” We know it; we fixed him. They also thought the Ref. was fixed, but he didn’t stay fixed them ways. I saw “Squint" talking to the umpire. I’ll say he needed a good talking to. We didn’t buy their Q. B. off; we knocked him that way. We had a whole bucket of dope on stoppin’ drop kicks, but M. kicked it over. M. wanted to play on their home grounds. What the h — difference did that make? •

Robertson, the prince that runs the Princess, says you can’t even get security in M. Since the game nobody owns anything. Our rule book is a misprint. We didn’t .realize it till we saw Gilroy’s decision on a blocked kick. “There’s a divinity that shapes our ends.” It was one of our well shaped ends that caught that forward pass that beat ?.em. Don’t forget yourself in Morocco. Cassel says it keeps him busy wiping the cobwebs out of the cash drawer. The only good thing In that burg-Is the bus for Rensselaer. —Contributed by a Fan.