Jasper County Democrat, Volume 23, Number 50, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 18 September 1920 — WITH THE FUNNY MEN. [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

WITH THE FUNNY MEN.

A Dangerous Answer. “What,” asked the lawyer of the expert witness, “leads you to conclude that the defendant in this case is crazy?” “Well, for one thing," replied the expert, “he's a golf player and talks nothing but golf." “Hold on," Interrupted the judge, “I’m going to have that answer stricken out I play golf myself." Defending the Absent. “I understand, my dear, your husband is very stingy with his needy relatives.” “That’s not true, ma. He’s that generous he would give them the clothes off his back, for when I asked him where his overcoat was so I could put*lt away, he said his uncle had it.”

An Easy Mark. The new typist has quite an air about her." “She .feels that stenography Is but a stepping stone to greater things.” “That may psove true In her case. The junior member of the firm Is singig, stout, susceptible and baldheaded." Getting Approximate Figures. “How many dark horses can there be in a presidential campaign?" “I don't know,” replied Senator Sorghum, absent-mindedly. "What’s the adult male population of the United States?” Dad Was Wise. “What did her father say when you asked him to consent to your marriage to his daughter?” “Said he expected something like that was coming. He Just knew I hadn’t been calling there every Sunday just to eat his wife’s cooking.”

Try a want *a in The Democrat

A Thoughtless Chauffeur. Simpkins—l jumped, but I wasn’t quick enough, and the auto struck mu and knocked me down. The chauffeur put on speed and dashed off. Jonesy—And didn't even give you a. chance to apologize.—Judge. Juvenile Genius. “Our child keeps asking more questions than I can possibly answer," said, father." “Yes,” replied mother. "She te * natural heckler."

f NO WONDER Mr. Ratt: How is It you aro aa friendly lately? Mr. Catt: My doctor has put as* on a vegetarian diet temporarily. Not Then. Ie silence really aolden? Never so, It's clear, When we could help a brother With a word of cheer.