Jasper County Democrat, Volume 21, Number 78, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 28 December 1918 — Page 8

THE ONNY SIDE

■ Again the H. C.' L.' ••Jtfy. income is; suffering,” moaned thejcsovlng picture star. “Ipn’t business good?” 4 > “Splendid. But my manager is compelled te spend so much for lunch and lodging Tn> afraid he won’t be able to thake Jup mx annual lncrease of salary.” ‘ ' j' -a's \ FOraaioht, “I understand dat de gemman you’s ftineter marry Is a co6k.” “Yes" replied Miss Miami Brown, '•I packed him out. De rule of dat happy home is* ginter be, ‘Any gemman dat find fault wif de cookin’ kin do de cookin’ hisself.’,” A Lonely Life. “Flubdub always seems so lone Some." ' ’ . " ‘ ■ * “Why, he married a fashionable beauty.” “Yes, he married her, but he has never succeeded In getting Into the set ‘she belongs to.” Quite So. Fat Man (after squeezing through) —Confound it 1 The turnstile Is a relic Of the dark ages. Gateman (smiling)—But you can’t (deny, old top, that it’s one of the that really count 1 A The Goose Step. ■ Ts. Flatbush—What new step was M.t you were trying last night? V ’r. Flatbush—That’S the goose step, t you know it? 1 . Flatbush —I never saw a goose S before.

Notice Closing Out Sale ' ’ . ■ ____fr ■ I - - 1 '■ ■■ ... 1.. I ■ I ' ■ Wishing to engage in other business I will sell my entire stock of GROCERIES at cut prices, commencing Monday, Dec. 30, ’lB Lasting until stock is sold. A FEW OF OUR CUT PRICES Canned pumpkin, per can lOC or 3 for 25c 25c Tomatoes large can ,7.. . ..,.. 20c 30c Peaches, per large can 25c 15c Catsup .2 for 25c 20c Catsup 15c 35c Salmon 30c, or 2 for 50c 25c Salmon . . .., 20c 15c Canned Beans 10c 18 and 20c Canned Corn, new pack just received. 15c [■ 15c Corn 13c, or 2 for 25c Canned Hominy, per can 10c Canned Jelly, per glass , /j . . ....... : ...... 10c and 15c 35c jars Pure Fruit Preserves at 30c I 30c jars Pure Fruit Preserves at ... 25c All canned Soups 2 for 25c I Peanut Butter in 7 pound pails, per pail $1.70 15c jars of Mustard . 10c Syrup, 1 gal, cans 80c, % .Harvest Hbme Baking Powder in Mason pint jars 13c, or 2 for 25c Coffee has advanced from 7c to 12c per pound, our prices are 25c to 30c per pound. Buy some. Rice, per pound . . 12 1 -2c Navy Beans, per pound 1 .7’7 12 1 -2c Colored Beans, per pound 10c 70 pound bags of Salt, per sack ....:. 98c Pure Lard, per pound . . 30c Compound, per pound. . ... A . ... ....... 25C Bacon, per pound 40c Old Dutch Cleanser, 3 cans for 25c Sun Brite Cleanser, 7 cans for. . .. .... ... 25c Corn Flakes, per package. . . . 10c Post Toasties .. 2 for 25c 1-5 below cost on all Toilet articles $1.40 Brooms $1.10.; $1.25 Brooms $1.00; others. 80c 6c and 7c Cigars. 5c Cut on all Tobaccos Matches, per box 5c Laundry Soaps from 5c to 7 c a cake Cut Price on everything we have in stock. A full line of Wear-U-Well Shoes, prices range from $2.48 to $4.48 per pair. No Deliveries Made After Saturday, Decemfter 2&,1^18 jambs snedeker NORTH SIDE GROCERY

BILL SELL 45,000 ANIMALS WarHorae*-and .Mules, to Be Aqc- - ti6ned at Camps. . (ihfngtbh, Dec. 27: ind mules and horses, part of rAprplfisj' supply, will ‘be ‘sold at n at camps throughout the couii* tt month. The sales' wiM be held ry t, 14, 21 and 28, and stock tb iptAeii 'of include* tjavkiry? artlfnd •firafc horses, m’nles sfidpack —4——4.--7.-1 3,ooo'lJpruylana fide Chile." ~ • Sima, IWi, 27.-*® Is estimated th« 3,0(10 ‘'fled from Olifie tb dwing (lie'fes| rfontfl as , a &Mt 'df theorists bearOigii H»Ad Peru. ■ . - ' .A- ftt|it Ot Main, Probably. ' , /‘By sir,” skid tin? suave sales* man,? as he handed the customer ids package and no change. “You will flnd|hat your suit-will wear like iron.” ■Agtf sure enough, it did. The man badrft it two months till It looked rusty.' v • ’ . > ..Natural Conclusion. • * , Tbjs Gullible GUy—l see that the doctors have .declared that a hot bath will weaken a pereon. 7’; ’ ' The? Skeptical Fellow—According to that (heory, no bath will make one strong V' .Y‘ t | : Time Values. “Th»e is money,” remarked the ready-®ada. philosopher. , “That’s right',” ‘ replied the gentle punster. “And the more times you subscribe to the Liberty loan the more money <yod’U have.” • 'V t—- —' . ' ’:", — : ' Where the Old Clothes Go. ■ “You' think great saving is effected by lettlfcg women do men's work?” “Yes; in ways we didn’t anticipate. We cafimow cut down sister’s overalls to fit little brother.” Literal. “She gave her lawyer friend a parar doxical wish." “What was itl” “Said she hoped his brief career would be a long one.” The Kind. “Pa, do Panama hats really come from a tree?” “Yes, my son.” “Is it a hat tree?” An armload of old. newspapers for a nickel at The Democrat office.

THB TVteg-A-WBBK TMMOCRA’T ■..

GE RM*N_ 9 L O O M . ‘ The Germans’ recent bad led Representative Shouse of Kansas to gay Wjfc dinner: 7;<‘GeKtaan ; defeats bn thSb/western front and German disappointmehfe in ihfe easf haveT <iw ® th® moralpvbf tbe'(/erman people terribly.'. The Gerriuta fceoflle are'no'W as sis the broker. • ' it, y." “ ‘Did you have a good day, love? a broker’s wife asked him In the nlng at dinner. <A : Y M ’i®otten,’ the 'broker groaned.‘Simply rotten. Everything I sold’ went down.’ ■ : “He ate soup in grim silence a Ht“ tie while, then he miiltfered: ‘“Thank goodness they couldn’t go sideways.’” ' -I •. A Conflagration. 4 Myrt—What caused the racket down 1 at your house Inst night? Gerf—-Oh, nothing nruch. That young Simpkins caMed and tried to propose 40-rnei. ‘ 7 . r" Myrt—Well, what of it? - ■ Gert—Pa heard him say he was on fire with a mighty love —and he put him but 4■.* • .... ■ .

VERY HIGH

She —Do you think the food in this restaurant is healthful? He (absently)—Yesj but the prices are sickening. As to Jonah. Poor Jonah, we will bet a pin. On being swallowed felt “all In.” He also felt, we may surmise, Glad that whales don’t Fletcherlze. Modest Request. Prison Visitor —My good man, is there anything I can do for you In the outside world? Convict —I’d appreciate It , very much, lady, if you’d call on the mayor and ask him to extend to me the freedom of the city. Of Practical Use. “Do you believe in the Darwinian theory ?” “Yes,” said Miss Cayenne. “I don’t know much about it, but it provides some sort of a stopping place for people who w-ould go on forever bragging about their ancestry.” The Suggestion. “Pop, are lawyers in court always bad tempered?” “Of course not. Why-do you ask that?” ’ “Why, the papers talk so about their cross examinations.” ° Up to Date. The Man—What is an appropriate gift for a baby? Clerk —How old is the child? The Man —About three weeks. 1 Clerk —Would you like to see something in cigars or playing cards? „ At the Woman’s Club. “Miss Gausip is very quiet over there." • “Yes; she says she’s in a train of thought” “Are (rains of that kind dangerous?” “I should say so. Just wait and see how- many people are run down.”

Wifey —How Is the weather out this moving? Hubby—Very pugilistic, my dear, wifey —Very how? Hubby—Windy. It Comes Off. This Is a grouchy world. Ah, me! A fellow seldom laughs. Why don’t we wear the smile that we Use In our photographs ? Penalty of Riches. “No man can acquire money without making sacrifices,” said the man Svho had made his. “NoXnot even when he marries for it,” replied the man who had tried the experiments—Life. Catty. 7 Belle— George thinks I’m easy to please. Nell —No wonder, after so man/ of na had turned him down. -4

MANY KILLED IN FIGHT AT BERLIN

Mutinous Sailors Holst the White Flag and Surrender to Gov’4 ■' / 1 emment. ■I T.. '*s MORE FIGHTING IS EXPECTED • h “v, ** ' ■’L' r /'*• ■S, *<:.■ '’.'v;’ l ■' ■ ' " .'j . ' ’ ' . infantry. Reported to Have Joined Mar rines—Ebert Told -to Resign—‘Ledebour and Liebknecht Want to Rule. , 7 .. j >. .; • ' r T v • ,'' Loudon, Dec. 27.—The mutthous-saiL who had befen holding oUt ih' thg 'fed palace at Berlin have hoisted the white flag and have been'allotted to leave Under guard,' according to reports from Berlin sent by the Exchange Teter j*raph correspondent at Amsterdam. Government troops, the ihessagb addb, now occupy the palace and the royal stables. - • Troops Join Revolting Sailo'lMfe The Aleianded and Franzeriaregiments have openly joined the rbvoiting sailors in Berlin, and it is predicted in advices Sent from Berlin late" Christmas night that nearly the' entirfe Berlin garHson wjll support them, leavlrfg the government without troops. Many soldiers belonging to the Berlin guard and a few of the republican guards joined the sailors, Vorwaerts res--ports. . Vorwaerts Plant Seized. Berlin, Dec. 27.—The edttqrlal and the publishing plant of the Socialist Vbrwaerts were seized and occupied at ten o’clock at night by members of the Spartacus group. The building was invaded by a party with i 8 machine guns. After taking possession they issued, hand bills on red paper under the caption “Red Vorwaerts.” The chief of police in Berlin, Eichhorn, who had sent police to protect the premises, appeared on the scene and assisted in the suppression of the majority socialist organ. It was announced by the Spartacus group that Doctor Liebknecht, their leader, would proclaim the overthrow of the Ebert government. During the last few 1 days the radical elements have threatened to suppress the Vorwaerts because of its attacks on the revolutionary terrorists.

The government sent out a. general order to the troops in Berlin to hold themselves in readiness. Spartacus forces have seized the Prussian war ministry, in addition to the Vorwaerts. The impression appeared to prevail that the radicals would make a general attempt to disrupt the present government.

Demand Ebert Quit. When these reports were sent a large number of armed civilians were continuing to join the sailors, not only at the royal stablhs, but in the Koenigstrasse. This street, with all its houses, was reported in the hands of the sailors; who were supported by the Spartacans. They demanded that Premier Ebert and Secretary Hasse resign and be replaced by George Ledebour and Dr. Karl Liebknecht. Doctor Liebknecht, the advices add, went to the chancellor’s palace and had a long conference with the ministers, the result of which was unknown. Further fighting, was anticipated, it was added, as the Spartacans and the sailors had decided to attempt to force the guards to return to Potsdam. The guards were stationed in Unter den Linden and on the Werderschen Platz. Nearly 100 persons were killed in the street fighting which began in Berlin Tuesday morning, according to the latest reports from, the German capital, transmitted by the Exchange Telegraph correspondent at Copenhagen. The Republican guards tried several times to take the royal stables and the headquarters of the revolting sailors, but were repulsed.

BIG FLEET ON WAY HOME

Eleven Transports Will Reach U. S. Ports Soon. Washington, Dec. 27. Departure from France of 11 transports, including the Mauretania with more than 3,000 men from the Three Hundred and Forty-seventh infantry of the Eightyseventh division, was announced by the war department. The Mauretania, which sailed Christmas eve, will reach New York Monday and most of the men aboard will be sent to Camp Dix for demobilization. Eight hundred Sick and wounded men are on the Henderson, due at New January 5, but the other vessels are bringing only a small number of men.

ITALY’S LOSS IS 2,800,000

500,000 Men Were Killed, 300,000 Died of Disease. New York, Dec. .27.—Italy’s losses in killed, wounded, dead of disease, disabled, missing and prisoners aggregate 2,800,000, according to Col. Ugo Pizzarello of the Italian army, who arrived here recently a mission for his government, “Disease alone took a death roll of 300,000 men in the war zone,” he said, “while the number killed was 500,000 and the wounded, missing and prisoners 2,000,000. Poland Threatens Germany. Zurich, Dec. 27.—Poland has sent an ultimatum to Germany, threatening war.

Speakers Bureau of National Security League Arouses People to Patriotism

By MRS. T. J. PRESTON.

The speakers’ bureau of the . National’ Security /league is not work of my choice, but, in assuming its duties as the successor of my husband, Doctor Preston, BMWSafrfl fl' w, *o organized it two years ago, lam guided by the principle by which I believe w? should alj be actuated 1 '2* “fly in taking up work of this character. It seems to be for , . the moment the thing'for me to do. fl kWL Jt ls Wlth noUttle tre P id^tion but ’ ow w ite W great importance, with great interest and enthusiasm 1 WTB that 1 , "" I,l,ake this work ’ lam eager to maintain ■' ? ‘-and carry out tha admirable organization which I find here, arid to extend, as the exigencies of this crucial time in the propaganda of patriotism demand, the opportunity to reach every possible listener and to increase the. numbers of speakers whom we can send out with the guaranty of the National Security league—speakers who, since the bureau has been in existence for a considerable period of time, have been thoroughly tried outs and who are all kept up, to the propaganda of the hour in these *swiftly changing times. Our speakers form an ever-growing group of overseas soldiers, statesmen, writers and' hundreds of other effective speakers not so well known, all selected for ability to arouse audiences to- patriotism. We are arranging for local meetings and routing speakers all over the United States as far as the Pacific coast. ■ • We are equipped to furnish to every type of meeting, from the large mass meeting to the small groupj clubs, banquets, shops, stores, schools, halls, churches, etc., and such open-air meetings a? for one reason or another are not covered by the “flying squadron,” an organization brought into the National Security league to look after out-of-door meetings, for which.it has a corps of especially trained speakers. We are able to supply speakers in twenty different languages. Our meetings nuipber more than ten a day. I shall give painstaking attention to the details of meetings, to the qualifications of our speakers and to fitting the right man or woman to the appropriate audience, and continue to employ the absolutely business methods of routine which I find prevailing.

What It Means to America If We Save Instead of Waste Paper of All Kinds

Every time you write a letter you use from one to four sheets of paper—perhaps the average might be placed at two sheets. r lwo sheets of paper, at today’s prices, would average about one cent. If you spoil and destroy one sheet in the writing you destroy one-half cent. In America there sare 20,X)0Q,000 families —perhaps 10,000,000 of those families send out an average of two letters a week. If each letter writer destroys one sheet of paper for each letter written 20,000,000 sheets of paper are destroyed each week. This means 10,000,000 cents wasted—or SIOO,OOO. Some families send out less than two letters a week —some, which include our business men, literary workers, professional men, club women, school children —use scores, hundreds, thousands of-sheets of paper every seven days. But if we, as a nation, waste SIOO,OOO a week in waste paper we throw away $5,000,000 a year and more.. But we also throw away or burn our newspapers and magazines—' and multiply our waste of paper by scores and hundreds of times. We throw away envelopes universally. We destroy our wrapping paper and paper bags. We spoil good sheets of paper with memoranda, figures, sketches, which might just as well be made on the envelopes, on the shreds of wasted sheets, on the wrapping papers. It is no exaggeration to say that we waste $100,000,000 worth of paper every year. Probably we waste much more than that —and think what $100,000,000 wo-?Jd do! But that isn’t all —every sheet of paper, after it is used for writing or printing or wrapping, still contains value. It is full of chemicals the government needs. It can be made over into new paper— it can be saved and used again. Figure it yourself on the basis suggested, and see what you and I might save, if we would, by a little forethought —a little employment of odd time, which we would otherwise waste. Then begin —save paper —save every scrap of it that comes your way. Slit your envelopes and use them for memoranda, make your newspapers and magazines into packages and send them to the Red Cross; save wrapping paper and deliver your collections of it to government or other agencies for utilizing it.

Yankee Soldiers Have Shown Daily That They Think Ahead of Germans

Yanks have shown daily that they have a habit of thinking ahead of the Hun, which is an innovation in the big war game. Corporal Hanan of an American infantry regiment, during the height of attack near Soissons saw a Hun abandon his machine gun and run into a cave. Right away Hanan stationed two private soldiers at the mouth of the cave, and gathering a bunch of grenades climbed to the top of a hill just over the entrance to the vault into which the German had disappeared. On the brow of the hill was something that looked like a chimney, and Hanan began tossing his grenades down the shaft. Events progressed quickly. Three German officers, one the colonel of a regiment, and 64 privates came out, shouting “kamerad.” ' Even chaplains have the Yankee fighting spirit which was proven by the action of Chaplain Bingham of Alabama. He lost his way while goingfrom regimental headquarters to a firs + -aid station, and wandered into the German lines. The'Huns kicked and cursed him. They were leading him to a machine gun nest when Bingham decided that it was his duty to strike a blow. So. he drove both fists into the face of one of his captors, knocking him flat.**He snatched up the u*fle of the fallen man, and shot the other Hun. In the meantime the Hun, who had been knocked down was on his. feet and made a savage lunge at the American with a Bingham gave the Hun the rifle butt on the head, and the Boche fell - as if hit with a piledriver. Bingham didn’t tarry any longer. He made a rush for the American lines and arrived in safety.

DECEMBEB 3*. 19 IS

Formerly Mrs. Grover Clevelaad

By S. A. PENNOCK

By HENRY JAMES BUXTON