Jasper County Democrat, Volume 21, Number 11, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 8 May 1918 — EDITORIAL PARAGRAPHS [ARTICLE]

EDITORIAL PARAGRAPHS

The wheels of the Russian war machine are accomplishing many revolutions. I The golf drive is near being driven out by the more prominent ' drives this season. | Alcoholic spirits have taken a back seat. Patriotic spirit is the national stimulant these days. • Congress has made a hundred 1 millionp people get up an hour ' earlier, but it has not affected . a i single rooster. ; The market basket is an'old and valued member of the community, but it has only recently taken its place in high society. Guatemala has now’ Joined the allies. Guatemala has a large supply of “shock" troops .that would 'prove effective if we could get them over there. z — z Now we are told that our own Charlie Chaplin is to defend a suit ' for breach of promise, thus demoni strating there is not harmony even among the stars. „ Considering the assuidity -and i unanimity and strenuosity' - with j which the Colonel is sawing wood, all fear of a fuel fAmine next winter should be dissipated. It's an ill wind that blows nobody good. The draft that wafted Grover Alexander away from the Cubs has probably supplied Uncle Sam with an excellent bomb thrower. It is said that when Lenine finishes his work in Russia he will come over here. And shortly after his landing. we predict a scarcity of feather pillows in his immediate neighborhood. Last year’s Cornell football team is going into tank service. They will use the ordinary tank armament and weapons. But these may not be necessary, for the football yell is likely to scare the enemy to death

“England’s spawn—America,” is the way the kaiser refers to us, adding that when he shall have crushed the parent he will turn his attention to the offspring. While we prefer a more euphonious term, we cheerfully acknowledge the relationship. England being the mother country, of the larger majority of Americans, will nerve us all the more to cru^h' the fearful thing aimed at her vitals. Germany will yet have cause to respect the power of the “spawn.” It is growing fast.