Jasper County Democrat, Volume 20, Number 1, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 31 March 1917 — Light as Chaff [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

Light as Chaff

The Smart Porter. “Here, you!” cried the fur coated gentleman to the porter on the suburban station. “Don’t you think that truck is

rather dangerous in that position?” “Wot!” said the newly promoted colored porter. “Think ifs pretty dangerous, does yer? Ain’t dat nice of yer to notice it! I s’pose yer gwine tell me where to put it? An’ how ’bout de ticket

office ? Mebbe yer t’ink dat would look better out on de track. An’ de switch tower? S’posiu’ we put her right over dere on Main street? P’raps you don’t like where de station master’s house am. Let’s move her on to de up platform. Any more suggestions yer got ter make?” The fur coated gentleman turned away and left the station. “Say,” said the porter to the ticket seller, “did yer hear how I turned down dat old guy? Pretty good, don’t yer think?" y- ,T “Well, I dunno about that,” said the ticket seller. “He happens to be our traffic superintendent.” Tobacco. Jock met his neighbor Sandy, who was smoking , some exceptionally fine

and fragrant tobacco sent by his t son in America. Jock drew his own pipe from an Inner pocket “Ha’ ye a match, Sandy?” he questioned. The match was proffered, but nothing more. “I do believe,"

said Jock, “I ha’ left me tubacco to bame.” “Then,” replufl Sandy after a brief silence, “ye micbt as well gie me bade me match.”—Country Gentleman.