Jasper County Democrat, Volume 19, Number 90, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 7 February 1917 — A LITTLE BIT HUMOROUS [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

A LITTLE BIT HUMOROUS

Deserving Character., “I saw a rather stout person out riding in your car yesterday afternoon who was a stranger to me. llAve you a relative visiting you?” “No. That was our cook. She has the use of our car twb afternoons a week.” “I would consider that a downright .imposition.” “You wouldn’t after you had tasted one of her pies.” Proved an Alibi. Dixon—l understand that Miss Overseven brought suit for damages against young Sapleigh for casting reflections upon her, Hixon —She did—but lost her case. Dixon —So? What was Sapleigh’s defense? Hixon —His attorney put him on. the witness stand and proved to the satisfaction of the jury that he wasn’t bright enough to cast reflections. Her Manly Trait. Knox—Mrs. Juno strikes me as being entirely too masculine for a woman. Mrs. Knox—That’s right. Why, every time she has an ache or pain she makes as much fuss about it as a, man would. OBLIGING.

Jimmy Hardnut —Yes, Earlie, it’s always customary ip launching a new boat ter break a bottle over de bow, an' as dere -ain’t no persons of prominence around, I’ll be kind ernuff ter do de bottle-bustin’ fer yer. Just'So. - —— The silence of a woman is, Conspicuous, as it were, Only after the undertaker mai Has gotten through with her. < Beginning of the Scrap. He was a widower and she was a Widow. They met —felt sorry for each other in their loneliness —and so they married. “I’m sorry,” he said one morning at the breakfast table, “that you can’t cook as well as pjy first wife did.” “And I am’sorry,” she rejoined, “that you haven’t the business ability my first husband had. He earned sufficient money to enable us to liire a cook.” ' 1 - /■. '■■ *V— Deeds of Daring. Cholly—l say, Fweddy, let’s—aw — do something despewate and bweak into the —aw —hewoic class, doncher know’. Fweddy—All right, deah boy. But what shall we do? Cholly Something ext waordi nary, doncher know. Haw! I have it. We’ll --aw’—have some bweakfast food for dinnah! 1 Not a Square Deal. She—But it is a woman s privilege to change her mind, you know. He —Yes, I suppose so. But it isn’t a square deal, just the same. She —Why not? He—Because when a‘ man changes his mind the woman in the case gets busy and sues him for breach of promise.