Jasper County Democrat, Volume 15, Number 9, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 4 May 1912 — SOLILOQUY OF ONE TUMBO [ARTICLE]

SOLILOQUY OF ONE TUMBO

Being the Private Thoughts of a Gentleman Just Now Somewhat Prominent. i ■ Years ago I said I’d never for atfllrd term make endeavor; that was when I reeked of virtue and my conscience was on ..edge; and it beats by comprehension why there’s so much public tension over such a trifling matter as a little broken pledge. Oh, your Harry, Dick and Thomas seem to look upon a promise as a thing that’s almost sacred, but that view is quite absurd save for men of low condition; one who stands in my position is superior to morals, and may break his plighted word. By the highways and the hedges let the rabble keep their pledges—honesty’s a splendid system tor the common class of skates; but my promise doesn’t matter when I hear the frenzied clatter, when I hear the loud kyoodle of the Seven Magistrates. What’s the use of being Turnbo, famous as was Barnum’s Jumbo, if I’m bound by superstitions of the stern, old-fashioned kind? What’s the use of being Teddy if conservative and steady mossbacks with a narrow vision roast me when I change my mind? lam loaded down with laurels, and I db not care for morals, and 1 make my own commandments, make * them as I go along; ancj whate’er I say is proper; mine to choose ’twixt truth t apd whopper, I am in the right forever, and the other fellow’s wrong.— Walt Mason, In Harper’s Weekly.