Jasper County Democrat, Volume 14, Number 62, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 8 November 1911 — WOES OF THE BUSINESS MAN [ARTICLE]

WOES OF THE BUSINESS MAN

Just a Sample of the Many Things That Turn His Raven Locks to Gray. The new girl was taking dictation from the head of the firm, a Wall street broker. In the letter the gentleman was Inveighing against the practices of certain get-rich-quick houses in the street. “The firm you mention,” he dictated in the course or his epistle, “have an office in an uptown hotel, but I do not consider their business legitimate. I have never had either liking or respect for bucket shops. With personal regards, I am yours very truly,” he finished. “Now you can sign that, Miss Pudge, and mail it, for I’ve got to leave at once.” Apd Miss Fudge did. The next day the boss glanced over the letter-copying book and tore his hair when he read, “I have never had either liking or respect for bucket slops.” And Miss Fudge put on her hat. The next stenographer was a young man. The boss dictated: "The deceased left neither bonds nor stocks.” Any writer of stenographic pothooks knows that the word “bonds” is written almost exactly like the word which is sometimes used for “trousers.” Hence the man stenographer's transcription: “The deceased left neither pants nor socks.” And the man secretary put on his hat Next?