Jasper County Democrat, Volume 14, Number 24, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 12 July 1911 — HAD A FINE THIRST [ARTICLE]

HAD A FINE THIRST

Took too Much Quencher, Got the “Wabbles,” and Now the Front Door is Locked. James Madison of near Virgie, who had been working on the H. O. Harris farm near Mt. Ayr, came to Rensselaer Monday morning and, owing to the vast difference in climatic conditions, proceeded to get a “bun” aboard. About 3 o’clock officer Mustard met James and proceeded to take him in out of the wet. In the absence of a “hurry-up’’ carryall James was assisted before the representative of the blind goddess with weights and measures, and according to his own testimony he was drunk and “his honor” said he believed it.

James was remanded to the county bastile, in the absence of the necessary cash outlay incidental to such experiences, where he may ponder on the vicissitudes of a thirst and will for a short period lead a life of innocuous desuetude.