Jasper County Democrat, Volume 13, Number 43, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 7 September 1910 — Verse Reform. [ARTICLE]

Verse Reform.

The printer is a strange concern. His type is wrongside to, And all he does is backward from The way he ought to do. E. g., tor instance, when he sets A poem up, you know. He evens out the left hand side And lets the right side go. But isn’t that a foolish way? You’d think that every time His lines came out unequally He’d even out his rime. Now, if my method comes in style, Dear reader, when you see The rimes lined up all straight and trim You’ll know it’s poetry. ’ —Roy Temple House in Puck. Musings of the Office Boy. Dey’s more’n one way to skin a customer. Try to suit ev’rybody and you might as well look for a new job. Most stenbg’s can bold their jobs if there’s plenty of good spellers in the office. Yon most always meet somebody you don’t want to if you sneak round to a ball game. I heard the boss and the stenog* make a agreement one day not to never eat no more onions. You get docked if you are late, but nobody ain’t. willin’ to pay you any more if you are a long ways ahead of time.—Boston Herald.

Just Acting Natural. “Few people are able to keep from letting money make a difference.” “In what way?” “Why. when they get rich most people at once assume a different attitude toward others—hold their beads high and permit their looks to tell you that you are at liberty to think what you please about them.” “That is no indication that they are different from what they were before they had money. Most of us feel that way all the time, only we can’t afford to show it until we get the cash.”— Chicago Record-Herald. Natural Inference. “By George, but 1 feel strong and vigorous!" said the summer boarder at Meadowview cottage breakfast table. "I just walked all the Way down to the village and back. ” “1 could have saved you all that trouble, old man.” whispered a new arrival. ”1 got two quarts of the real old stuff In my grip!”—Denver Republican.

Th* Eternal Question. A teacher was trying to explain the dangers of overwork to one of the smaller pupils. “Now. Tommy.” she pursued, “If your father were busy all day and said he would have to go back to the office at night what would be be doing?’ “That's what ma wants to know.”— Life. t , Not So Bad. Mrs. Myles—You weren’t -at the bridge party yesterday? Mrs. I was detained by sickness at home. . “So sorry! 1 hope your dear little dog Fido wasn’t sick?’ “Oh, no; only one of the children?*— Yonkers Statesman. \ Love! Nelly—Mr. Welloff asked my opinion about sending you a birthday present, and 1 told him you had stopped having birthdays five years ago. Was that right? ivy—Yes, I believe so. At least it was three years after yon stopped.— New York Journal-

Hunting News. “Poor Henpeck! Every time he starts to say anything his wife stops him.” “Not always. He has a habit of talking in his sleep, and when he does that she just listens breathlessly.”— Catholic Standard and Times.