Jasper County Democrat, Volume 13, Number 16, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 1 June 1910 — GANDERBONE'S FORECAST [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

GANDERBONE'S FORECAST

FOR JUNE. Copyright 1910, by C- H. Reith. Der Kaiser of dis Faterland Und Roosevelt all dings command— Ve two and Gott, you understand — ; Myself—und Tet. It used to be yust Gottund me, But Tet he come tp make it dree, Und Gott don’t count much latterly— Yust me and Tet mit power divine To keep de rest of dem in line—In bease und Var to give der sign— Un somedimes — Myself und Tet der same as peas—Der same mlt Gott, If you shall blease —- -.Y Der same In war, der same in beace— Myself—und Tet. Der eastern hemisphere for me— For Tet der one across der sea— For Gott dei'sky, ve vill agree— Myself—und Tet. A health to me —a health to Tet— Und one for Gott alreatty yet— Vun Holy Trini{y, yon bet— Ye two—und Gofi

Besides a day in June, my dears, all other days are nothing, for then it is one’s eager ears may hear the soft wind^.soughing by forest ways and perfect days of brightly flowered meads and joyous song are come along just like a string of beads. A poet one time asked us what is peradventure like it, and died well knowing we had not the wit required to strike it. He simply tried before he lied, to give us one so hid we’d work at it till time shall quit, and by the gods he did. The breath of summertime shall rouse the festive calf to action, and what with unrestrained carouse, he’ll do for an attractiop. He’ll buck and dance around the manse in no great show of grace, and wave his tail with brave assail in Mr. Halley’s .face. The heavy-droning bumblebee shall kiss the blushing clover, and skies as blue as any sea shall bond the planet over.'The graduate shall right the state from Maine across to Yuma, and the groom in stress shall S. O. S, his dad for more mazuma.

Of June it may be said, indeed, It is a great invention, And one rather badly need To somewhat ease the tension. If we’re to fish, to loaf and wish, Or hearken Nature’s call. We’ll do it soon or late In June, ’ ; Or not do ft at all. j The comet, having hung about until we were converted, shall gradually peter out and leave us i quite deserted. We must recall) we are not all the world it sets j aright, and bid it speed where ! there is need to cause another fright. It is a sort of cop upon a beat of great dimensions, by then be getting on to scatter! its attentions. They have John D.’s and Morgan P.’s on many a j distant ball, and were it not for! Hallev hot these few would grab it all.' A Guggenheim would capture .\lars, a Rockefeller Venus, and) Morgans on the other stars | would utterly’ demean us. We’d j even be, unlfappily, quite naked where we sit if it were not that Halley got around and saw to it. It will not all at once appear] how far the comet served us, or I just to what extent the fear pre-j vailed while it observed us ; but] safe to sav that for a day or thereabouts somwheres the trusts won't find it half so hard to teli our things from theirs. , However, and be it as it may, The .comet will outspace us, And Theodoras on a day Will happily embrace us. The hemisphere will .tip, we fear, Beneath his mighty traclL But even to the liars will Rejoice to see him back. ’Twere better to be in a club and branded Ananias than lanquish sadly r as a dub unsung or honored by us. The chance for fame since Afric game wooed

this extraordinary son of the; Dutch has not been much, and | he is welcome, very, j Our Mr. Taft’s a good old soul, [and plugs along undaunted, but Theodoras on the whole was rather what we wanted. We never cease to prate of peace and sav that war is bad, but even so it does get slow with no one very mad. y We rather like the pleasant sound, of peace gone willy-nilly, ambsomeone being chased around the White House with ,a billy. We’ve missed it much for lack of Dutch in smiling Mr. Taffy and mortal sin but it has been a long time since we laughed. The present Congress wfll conclude Where freedom's latest squawk was. And turn to have its work reviewed By all the big chautauquas. The President will pitch his tent At Beverly again, And the news anon willMwel! upon The likelihood of rain. Upon the 21st the sum will reach the line of Cancer, and summer not too underdone will haply be the answer. This is, they say, the longest day, however you may search, but you will hardly notice it unless you are at church. At any rate, the swimminghole will get a little warmer, and harvest time will vex the soul and slumber of the farmer. He’ll pray for hands to tend his lands, spread food ani tie the dog; and the wary tramp will make his camp inside a hollow log. ’ The rich will hie away to spend the summer by the water —to live until the season’s end of the glad life of an otter. The poor, meanwhile, will sweetly smile, however fortune goes, and splash and rub inside the tub alternate with the clothes. The singing stars will reindulge their old familiar riddle, and milk and buttermilk will bulge the boarder round the middle. The heart for June a tune, or plenty or a erusl, and the whippoorwill when night is still will whistle like to bust. And then July will come around In terrible ascendance, And we will shoot each other up ' Observing independence.