Jasper County Democrat, Volume 11, Number 59, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 26 December 1908 — Humor and Philosophy [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

Humor and Philosophy

By DUNCAN M. SMITH

PERT PARAGRAPHS.

Be cheerful at any cost to the house or company. When the new wife finds out that John likes corned beef and cabbage better than he likes angel cake , one more illusion has gone to swell the vanished myriads.

The man who systematically blows his own horn uses his lungs to such an extent that he is apt to get chesty. Don’t kick. Get some one else to do it It will conserve your own reputation and be just as effective. A good, substantial excuse is always desirable, but is apt to be expensive. —— < Don’t speak harshly of your enemies. They expect you to knock them, and if you have them guessing they will cease activities for a time. V To keep on good terms with some neighbors you have to be deaf as a post and blind as a bat and stand for all the ghastly Jokes that they spring. Speak gently to an angry man. He will want to kill you anyway, so it doesn’t matter if you do incense him further. It takes a lot of confidence in your appetite to cause you to order scrambled eggs at a restaurant.

The man who makes a good living hasn’t much to complain of unless somebody else gets it. The days are so short that lots of us don’t find time in which to earn e much needed rest.

He doesn’t see why his wife should object to being left alone whenever he wants to leave her alone. He didn’t take a contract to keep her entertained, not if he knows it, even if he did happen to marry her.

Something About Peafowls. India is the real home of the peafowl. There the fowls are hunted, and their flesh is used for food. As they live in the same region as the tiger, hunting them is dangerous sport. The long tall of the peafowl is really not its tail, but feathers that grow out just above it and are called tail coverts. This bird has been known for ages. It is mentioned several times tn the Bible. The ancient Romans considered the brains of the peafowl a dainty tidbit and used to kill thousands of the birds to get the brains for their emperors’ feasts. The Salic Law. The laws of the Salic or Salian Franks, committed to writing In the fifth century, are known in history as the Salic law. One of the provisions of this law relates to the succession to the Salic lands, which was restricted to male heirs, the object being no doubt to secure the military service of the chief proprietors. The rule of succession to the lands was afterward extended to the French throne, this principle becoming firmly established during the fourteenth century, so that women and girls were rigidly excluded. Dct.cix: Gold Medal Flour is the only “beat” Jmmu.