Jasper County Democrat, Volume 11, Number 58, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 23 December 1908 — Humor and Philosophy [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

Humor and Philosophy

DUNCAN M. SMITE

EFFECT OF THE WONDER.

Tou ought to hear that boy of mins Arise and speak a piece. Just like a lawyer, you would swear, As slick, by Joe, as grease! He doesn't, hesitate nor halt As though he were afraid. He starts right in Jo sawing wood As though it were his trade. To hear him you would almost think That you could see the Alps That Caesar or Napoleon crossed When after heathen scalps, . Or you could view with half «n eye Horatlus bravely stand And hold defying foes That stood on every hand. He rushes up and down the stage * And makes the rafters hum. Tells what Tat Henry had to say When he was going some. His “Curfew Must Not Ring Tonight” Is said by one and all To be the best they ever heard From one so very small. , Bay. they would have him on the stags If I would give consent, For he’s a wonder, honor bright. Or I don't want a cent. And nothing la for that bright chap Too difficult or deep— What’s that? Jast talking of my boy I’ve put" you all to sleep?

f \ «t * Seems That Way. Of all the plagues with fehich this land is actively accurst , i The man who says “I told you” and “I knew It” Is the worst. * H

How Do They Know? “There’s always room at the top." “So I have heard, but I have my doubts.” “Have your doubts?” “I have.” “And why, pray?” “I have always noticed that It is always those who were never there that are prating about it.” That Loud. "Is Mabel engaged?” “I heard a rumor to that effect” “What kind of a noise does a rumor make?” ? “This one sounded like a big red auto.” * Suspicious. “Adversity, they say, is often the friend of genius.” “Well, I wonder”— “What?” "What sort of pull adversity has.” Sounded Familiar. “These close, poorly ventilated sleeping cars must be hard on the lungs.” “I should think so, and, come to think of it, I believe I have heard people speak of Pullmanary diseases.”