Jasper County Democrat, Volume 11, Number 45, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 7 November 1908 — Humor and Philosophy [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

Humor and Philosophy

By DUNCAN M. SMITH

The Pessimist. "What’s the matter?” “Company coming.” “Don’t you like them?” “Oh, yes, but it means a big feed tonight.” “Don’t you like that?” “Yes.” “Why the weeps?” “Think of the leftovers I will have to eat for the next three days.” That Old Overcoat.

The summer season wanes apace; A chill is in the air. I take it from Its wonted place. And how the people stare! Pert Girl. > “What’s the good of fools anyway?” “Well, they are amusing.” "I don't think so.” i “No?” “No; I am bored to death this minute.” Hard to Please. "You are a tyrant.” “I—why, I want all the world to be happy.” "Well, what business have you with all the world, anyway?”

Simple. Ho hadn’t boat nor airship. He hadn’t any "hoes," And so he went down to the ford And brought himself across. PERT PARAGRAPHS. Praise Is Indeed commendable, but it must be confessed that there Is sometimes an undertow of conceit coming after. The hot air treatment for difficulty of any kind is veVy seldom efficacious. A modest exterior may hide a great spirit—and frequently does very neatly cover a vacuum. • Some ueople aren’t salable who nevertheless are very frequently sold. It must be desperately harrowing to a truly good man to discover that he has been good for nothing. The queer thing about a great man is that be never seems to work hard at It.

An enthusiastic person may not always be sincere, but why engage in analysis and Introspection? Probably nobody Is ever any better than you should be. Never trouble trouble until trouble begins to sue.

An excellent brand of pessimism may be superinduced by such a simple matter as an indulgence In coffee and doughnuts. Be gentle to all you chance to touch and do not tax them overmuch. It is never too late to make a mistake and lay It on the other fellow. Tbe man who does something different fondly imagines he Is leading the simple life.