Jasper County Democrat, Volume 10, Number 27, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 5 October 1907 — MATRIMONIAL [ARTICLE]

MATRIMONIAL

“Ob, Mildred, I’m so glad you have called! I’m iu great trouble. That dreadful husband of mine! Oh, my heart will break! I know It will!” Mrs. Mosely’s young spinster friend closed the sitting room door of the pretty Kensington flat and prepared for a revelation of connubial tyranny and iniquity. “Read that!” cried Mrs. Mosely, bedding out at arm’s length a newspaper with her thumb nail pressed vl ciously into one corner of an advei tlsement column and then bursting into fresh tears. Mildred Clarke read as follows: “Matrimony. Bachelor, thirty-six going to the colonies, tall, dark, educated and well connected, with fair income, desires the acquaintance of a healthy, domesticated and refined young lady with a view to marriage. Address Carlo, Guilford Chambers. Leadenhall Street, E. C.” “Why, your husband’s offices are at Guilford chambers!” “Yes—the monster! And he is thirtysix years of age and tall and dark, and he has had the brutality to use the pet name Carlo, by which I have always called him. Oh, the wretched bigamist!” “But it is impossible that he can con template committing such a crime.” “I am sure he is. bad enough for anything. Only the'day before yesterday, just because I said I wished I had never seen his face—he was so provoking in consequence of the eggs being boiled hard—he said that if I really meant it he would go abroad and start life again in one of the colonies. It shows that his mind was running on deserting me. Oh, Mildred, what can I do?” “I hardly know, dear. It looks serious.” "Have you any scheme in your mind, Mildred?” “Yes. First of all, we will answer the advertisement in person.” “In person?” “Fortunately I have,never yet succeeded in meeting your husband, so he doesn’t know me. You shall accompany me as a friend, for propriety’s sake, in disguise, you know.” An hour later two ladles were shown Into the private office of Mr. Mosely. “Are you the gentleman who has advertised under the name Carlo?* asked Mildred. "Er—yes, but replies should be made by letter.” “I thought a personal Interview might be more satisfactory than a letter in a ease of this kind. I hope I” “Oh, not at all! I’m sure I am only too delighted to have the opportunity of—l suppose I may take it that ydb are yourself an applicant—ahem!—that you are interested in the matter on your own account?” “Quite so. It occurred to me that”— “You find the position embarrassing? It certainly Is rather comical. But let us treat the matter in a businesslike way. I presume this lady is”— “My friend. You may speak as if we were alone.”

“Well, then, you will have learned from the advertisement that I am thirty-six years of age and a bachelor. “I am going to Australia next month, and it is my desire, if I am lucky enough to find a suitable lady who is willing to marry me, to take out an English wife with me. I shall be able to produce satisfactory proofs, I think, es my position, good character and income. “May I at least hope,” he went on, '“that you will give me some encour agement and that— Good heavens, my wife has fainted!” He ran forward and caught her in his arms. The words “my wife” -told Mildred in a flash that Mr. Mosely had knowm Ethel all the time in her disguise. “Ethel, darling,” he cried as his wife opened her eyes, “It’s all a Joke. I knew you all the time. The advertisement is for a friend of mine. How can you doubt my faithfulness, little wife?” “Oh, Carlo! It isn’t true, is it? You are not going to desert me? But how did you recognize me, Carlo?” Mrs. Mosely asked.

“Principally by that uncommon bangle which you forgot to take off. I had been thinking what you would be likely to do if you happened to see the advertisement. Then the general publib would not know that Carlo was likely to be found at Mr. Mosely’s office rather than at one of the fifty other offices in this building. Finally yon seem to have forgotten that, though I had never before met Miss Mildred Clarke, her photograph is in your album!” “But I must ask you,” said Mrs. Mosely severely, “to give me an explanation as to the real Carlo.’* “He is an old schoolfellow of mine. We drew up the advertisement togeth er, and I let him use this address. I adopted the word Carlo for the simple reason that one word would seem as well as another, and Carlo occurred to me first The bachelor’s name is Herbert Carter. You shall see him.” Mr. Mosely rang his bell. A tall and hmidsome man entered and was presented to the two ladles. “Miss Clarke, I may tell you,” said Mr. Mosely, “has called in reply to your advertisement.” Mildred blushed and attempted an indignant denial, but the curious fact remains that in the following month she went out to Australia as Mrs. Herbert Carter.—Philadelphia Item.