Jasper County Democrat, Volume 9, Number 19, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 11 August 1906 — LITTLE VISITS WITH "UNCLE BY" [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

LITTLE VISITS WITH "UNCLE BY"

The Billy Goat. When William ate the dynamite The clock had Just struck 7. 'Twas only 7:01 when Bill Made entre into heaven! Just Fer Phun. A married man never has to go around hunting for trouble —there is plenty at home. “Breakers Ahead” is the title of a new novel. Sounds like the story of a St. Joe wedding. Eat eggs! The packers cannot adulterate them! it is hardly necessary to add that only good eggs should be eaten. A London doctor says everyone should have an hour of absolute silence every day. But we cannot all live in Philadelphia. According to a Missouri paper a ballet dancer known to the footlights has her feet insured for >20,000. Naturally her feet come high. Madame Sarah Bernhardt cannot understand why Chicago people have allowed the borders of Lake Michigan to be spoiled by th£-.railroads. Neither can the people—now^ In a recent survey of American literature George Moore found only three commendable writers —Poe, Walt Whitman and Edgar Saltus. Gee, that’s tough on Richard Harding Davis and me. It Is said that Horace Fletcher started “the chewing fad” —that is, the thorough mastication of food. That’s all right for Horace, but what I want to know is, who started “chewing the rag”? An aeronaut having sailed the aerial ambient dropped down at the White House and called on the president.

Mr. Roosevelt remarked, dryly, that never before had he received a caller from an air ship. Many had come with air castles, but none, prior to that, with an airship. V Attorney General Hadley, of Missouri, when nominated for the office he holds, did not seek It; In fact, did not want It. It has since developed that Standard Oil didn’t want him to have it, either, although the Standard didn’t know it at the time. It costs money to “wake up.”