Jasper County Democrat, Volume 9, Number 7, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 19 May 1906 — LITTLE VISITS WITH "UNCLE BY" [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

LITTLE VISITS WITH "UNCLE BY"

Yearning. I want to trail back to the field and the wood Where zephyrs are kissing the trees. Where rivers sing softly their rhythms of peace m And melody rides on the breeze. I want to go back to the old bayou bridge And angle for fish with a pin, To feel once again all the thrills I have known At hooking'fend landing a fin! I want to return where the gooseberries grow, Where choke-cherries pucker yourthroat— I want to go pond-lfty hunting once more In Stewart’s old, fiat-bottomed boat. I want to be lost in the heart of “The Kun,” Where squirrels and owls have their nests; I want to flop down on my back ’neatb the elms And worship the Blue through their crests! 1 1 want to go barefoot along the old trail That leads to the clover-decked hills By ways that are winding, where bushes hang low And whisper their loves to the rills! I want to go back and just splash in the creek And let the cool Cedar run fast— Run over and under, and scold as It laves, The hands it has known in the past! I want to wade out where the sand-bar is heaped In diamonds that sparkle -with lightjust wade and get sopping clear up to my waist, And holler—and yell—in my might! I want to run down to "The Quarry,” “The Hill.” “The Bend,” "The High bank” and "The Strand”— Let me stand all enthroned where my boyhosd was spent. Take me back to my own Fairyland! Take me hack where the are sweet with perfum®. Where the bees sing a song that is glad— Take me back, let me feel in my heart once again. Just the God-given joy of a lad! • * *

She Found It. A small boy behind the davenport was intently listening to the conversation between his sister and her beau. When the visitor finally proposed. she blushingly stammered, hesitated and finally gurgled: “Really. Mr. Popmore, this is so sud —er —l —that is—l. Why, I seem to have lost my head entirely!” Just then little Willie knowing a refusal would be a family calamity, jumped up from behind the sofa and shouted: “There it is, sis; there it is! There’s yer head, right on yer feller's shoulder!" Strange to say, the sister found the lost member immediately! • * * Alfalfa. The Chicago papers have just discovered that spelling “Zion” backwards gives “noiZ.” And Dowie too far away to argue the question! The champion absent-minded man hails from Kansas. His wife has to watch him continually to keep him from putting the lamp to bed and blo wing himself out. The man whose occupation is being a good fellow usually finds himself out of a job when all his money has been spent. Love at first sight frequently depends upon whether or no the girl has the money in her own name. Many a young woman's shirtwaist is rumpled because it has just been pressed.

The old-fashioned man loved to do good things. So does the present-day man, but, to be up-to-date, quote “good things.” Many a woman marries a man because, while he is not good enough tor her, he is too good to throw himself away on some other girl. A married man does not live longer than a bachelor. It only seems longer. Many a husband enjoys his wife s vacation more than she does. Some things go by contraries. There is the angleworm, for instance, that has not an angle in it. No, dearie, piebald horses are not raised on piebald pie.

Little Willie had slapped his sister and spat in her faee. His mother remonstrating vehemently with Willie, told him it was the nasty devil within him that made him strike his sister “It may have been the devil that made me slap her, ma,” exclaimed Willie, “but the spittin’ in her face was my own idea!” No, Curly Locks, artificial ice cannot be paid for with artificial money. * * • Naming the Baby. What shall we name the baby? Dear little fluffy pup! What shall we name the baby? Muzzer just eat him up! * What shall we name the baby? Fur of a «lossy hue! Tippy or Fldo or Carlo, Which Is the name for you? What shall we name the baby? Joy of our fam’ly nest! Where Is th’ pet name itttlng? Which do you like the best? What shall we name the baby? Ma'ma's own baby pug! What shall we name the baby? Mercy! but there's the rub! _BYRON WILLIAMS,