Jasper County Democrat, Volume 8, Number 37, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 16 December 1905 — The Abduction [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

The Abduction

By C. B. LEWIS

It was a plan conceived in the mind of Jerry Palmer, convict No. 4370, one night as he tossed to and fro on his prison couch about three weeks previous to the expiration of his live years’ sentence. Jerry had tried thieving, burglary and forgery and had served sentences for all of them and after thiuklng things over had concluded to make a change. Reform was not Included In the change. Jerry strongly believed that the world owed him a living and that it was his constitutional privilege to get that living in the easiest way possible. Ho would keep right on thinking so, but he would adopt a new and safer line. .....—„ „ “Abduction is the thing!" exclaimed Jerry to his prison walls wtien he had thought the matter all out. "There’s more clean cash to be made In abducting some rich man's gal than in committing half a dozen burglaries, and the risk is a mere nothing. All you have to do Is to seize her, shut her up somewhere till the fond futher will pay your price and then produce her and lug away the plunks —no publicity, no police, no prison walls. The rest of the crowd can go ahead on old lines, but It’s abduction for me for the rest of my natural life.” Jerry hadn't been out of prison two days when he hunted up his old partner, Mike Donovan, and gave him the tip. Mike, too. was ready to drop old lines and take up something new. He had shown energy and ambition as a burglur and had somewhat astonished the police by stealing a steam boiler left on the public street at night, hut had found there was no money In It. He had figured It out that the- beef trust was making more in three seconds that he was In three years, and If he hadn't met Jerry he might have opened a saloon and sold wood alcohol to his patrons. The first thing was to find a rich man with a daughter. No rich man’s daughter can be abducted properly until after she tias been located. This task con-

Huuu-d about three weeks’ time. The pair finally found a rich man with a daughter about sixteen years old, and they looked upon the battle as half won. At this point, however, they ran short of funds, with the result that they had to take Tommy Saunders Into partnership. Tommy wus a good sort—that Is, he was one of their sort, and Just then he had some money. He didn’t explain bow he got into the bouse nor what the haul amounted to, and his partners didn’t ask. There is etiquette even among thieves. “Gents,” observed Tommy after the

terms of partnership had been settled, “abduction Is the thing! All you have to do Is to pick the gal up under your arm and take a scoot to a place already prepared, and at the end of a week her father gives up fifty thou, and you deliver his darling birdie at the kitchen door. If it’s Jerry Palmer’s plan—and he says it is—then all I can say is that Jerry should take his place among the greatest statesmen of the country.” An old house In the suburbs that had been tenantless for a year was selected as the hiding place, and then it only remained to get hold of the girl. Some trouble was anticipated here. None of the trio had studied the habits of rich men’s daughters, and they were thus at a disadvantage. Fortune favored them, however. The very first evening they took up their watch in the neighborhood of the house they saw the daughter come out with a basket on her arm. She had a shawl over her head and was otherwise disguised. Just why this should be so they didn’t stop to figure, but when the young lady came out on the third evening she was seized In first class style, bundled into nu old hack andiby great good luck landed in the old house without an alarm having been given. ' Jerry, Mike and Tommy agreed that It was a most skillful piece of work. True, the abducted had bitten Jerry’s thumb half off when he seized her, and she hod kicked the shins and scratched the faces of the other two during the ride, but that only meant an additional ransom. Her father would have to pay $5,000 extra for that. When the retreat was reached the

handkerchief over the girl’s mouth was cast loose, a candle lighted, and she was put on exhibition. Somewhat to the surprise of the abductors she began to swear, and every 6lang word used anywhere for the last ten years rolled off her tongue. When she was obliged to pause for breath the trio retired Into a corner to hold a consultation. “I never knowed that rich men’s daughters tulked that way,” admitted Jerry, with serious countenance. “Nor I,” added Mike, “but there can’t be no mistake. She had just come out of the gate when we seized her.” “I dunno why rich men’s gals shouldn’t cuss and slang when they get mad same as any others,” mused Tommy. “As soon as she gets over It she’ll put on her aristocratic airs and full at our feet and be ready to write a letter .to her pa. I’ve got one ready for her to copy. It says: ‘Deer pa, 1 am bein’ held for fifty thousand plunks. If you ever want to see your darlin’ agin give up the dough to the barer of this.’ ” "Now, then, cullies, what is It?” asked the girl as their consultation was ended. “In the first place,” answered Jerry, who constituted himself as spokesman, “you have been abducted.” “And what’s that, you rat headed peauut stealer?” “You have been tooken from your rich father and are to be held here until he comes down with the cash.” “Hully gee!” “You will write him that you have been what they calls abducted, but that you are In the hands of gentlemen who are treating you kindly.”

“It’s bewtifuTTcully. <3o on!” “Them same gentlemen, wantin’ to take a trip among the aristocracy cf England, but havin’ no money, will hold you till he comes down with $30,000. If It’s all the same to him we’d like the money in $5 and $lO bills.” “Oh, Abraham!” chuckled the girl. “And in writin’ the letter you may add that your couch is not downy and your food not lobster salad and that if your old man gets a hustle on him it will be just as well for you and better for the gents as has carried along the Job. That’s all, I believe, just at present, except that we are slightly astonished that you should have picked up such language in a drawin’ room. The letter will not be writ till mornin’, and meanwhile you can stand up In a corner and go to sleep feelin’ as safe as If in your little bed at home.” As Jerry finished his talk the girl broke into laughter and kept it up for five minutes. She laughed in half a dozen keys, and there was sarcasm as well as humor in her tones. Theu she sang a verse of a topical song. Then she screwed up her face and in whining tones gave them an imitation of a beggar soliciting alms. Then she turned cart wheels twice around the room, Indulged In half a dozen somersaults and finished with a low courtesy and the words: “Ladles and gents all, Slapin’ Sal thanks you for your bloomin’ kindness and has the honor to wish you good evenin’.” With that she went clattering downstairs, and not a hand was lifted to prevent her. The three men smoked In silence for five minutes, and then J?rry Palmer heaved a sigh and said:

“Gents, it was a plan I thought out In state’s prison, and I won’t go for to say that there wasn’t a hole In it” “And I’m sayin’,” added Mike Donovan, “that when three gents can’t tell the difference between a rich man’s daughter and a gal that was at the kitchen door beggin’ for cold vittles them three gents ought to go to stealin’ from pushcarts.” It was up to Tommy Saunders to express himself, but he was slow about It When he did speak, all he said was: “That’s just like ’em! The rich never will give a poor Aan a show!”

“SLAIIN’ SAL THANK YOU FOR YOUR BLOOMIN' KINDNESS.”