Jasper County Democrat, Volume 7, Number 46, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 18 February 1905 — Willing to Amend It. [ARTICLE]

Willing to Amend It.

There was once in New York an Irish tailor whose eccentricities threatened to bring trouble to him, but whose wit always saved him. One morning a Mrs. Murphy came into his shop and found him working laboriously with a pencil and a piece of paper. She asked him what he was doing, and he replied that he was making out a list of the men on the block whom he could whip. “Is Murphy’s name there?” inquired that man’s wife. The tailor confessed that, like Abou Ben Adem’s, Murphy’s name headed the list. When Murphy heard of this he came to the shop with belligerence in his eyes. He inquired if the report was true. “Sure an’ it’s true. Phwat of It?” returned the tailor. “You little grasshopper,” said Murphy, “I could commit suicide on yez wid me little finger. I could wipe up de flure wid yez wid me hands tied!” “Are ye sure about thot?” asked the tailor. “Sure I’m sure about it.” “Weil, then,” sighed the knight of the shears regretfully, “I’ll scratch ye ass the lisht.”