Jasper County Democrat, Volume 7, Number 35, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 3 December 1904 — NEW SHORT STORIES [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

NEW SHORT STORIES

She Taught Him Tact. The late Louis the millionaire baker, not only distributed food to poor men in the "btead line” he had established in this city, but he also got these men employment. He went among them and conversed with them, and the delicacy of his questions to them, the care he took not to hurt their feelings, was remarkable. One day he said: “The more unfortunate and wretched people are the more sensitive they are, the more easily they arc wounded. The public does not bear this fact enough in mind. “And yet it is a fact that is continually being proved, sometimes pathetically, sometimes humorously. It was proved humorously to a friend of mine last slimmer in Scotland. “He was making a walking tour. lie was climbing mountains and viewing lakes and torrents. One morning on a quiet road he met a young woman, tall and comely, who walked barefoot. “Surprised, my friend stopped the young woman and said: “‘Up all the people hereabout go barefoot?* “She answered: “‘Some of them do, and the rest mind their own business.’ ’’—New York Tribune.

Ilntl the Symptoms. “A friend of mine, an overworked editor,” said Senator Depew, “took last summer ids first vacation in seventeen yea rs. “He went to a rugged New England district, a quaint village that nestled at the foot of great mountains on the shore of a deep lake. “He arrived-on a bright, fine morning. and so greatly was lie pleased with tlie grandeur of the scenery and with the pure and perfumed air that, setting out for a little exorcise, he

soon found himself leaping fences, running, singing and dancing through the eountry like a child. “Suddenly ns he skipped around a curve of a quiet road a hand was laid on his shoulder, and a stern, angry face looked into his. “ ‘Come with me to the station house,' a harsh voice said. “ ‘Why, what for?' asked the amazed editor. “ ‘I am the town constable,’ said the other, ‘an’ for the last half hour I have been w-atehin’ ye jumpin’ over fences an’ Bingin’ an’ dancin’. No sano man w'ould act so, an’ I’m goin’ to lock ye up for an escaped lunatic.’ ’’—Denver Republican.

Ont of Order. P. J. Carlou, a well known young New York lawyer, tells this story about Senator Albert Beveridge: “Several years ago the ladies belonging to a certain club in Indianapolis held a meeting at which the speakers were all to he women. Mrs. Beveridge was one of those who occupied seats upon the platform. During the afternoon Mr. Beveridge entered the hall and was given a seat next to his wife. At the conclusion of the address of one of the ladies Mr. Beveridge arose, approached the front of the platform and began talking to the audience without having been invited or introduced. The chairman of the occasion was William Deacon, now managing editor of the Indianapolis News, and he did not like Beveridge anyway. Throughout the talk of the senator to be Deacon sat with his head resting in his hands, never once lifting his eyes. When the finish came he drawled out, without looking up, “The lady who has just spoken is out of order.”—New York Times. A Sport to the Last. “I read in the paper the other day,” said Tom Dunn, former sheriff of New York county, “where a German over in Hoboken left $25 In bis will to treat his friends after his funeral. Of course the Germans never did anything that the Irish could not equal, and so that' story reminded me of another of a Hibernian friend of mine. The doctor told him he had only a few hours to live. He called me over, and says he: “ Tom, I want you to take $lO of me money that’s in me wallet and treat me pallbearers.’ “It was a touching moment. Struggling with my emotions, I said tb him: “ ‘l’ll do it, Billy. But shall I treat ’em going out or coming back? 1 “ Treat ’em going ont,’ says Billy, a sport, tp the last. ‘I won’t be with you coming back.’ "—New York Times.

“I Apprenticed My Son.” The best way of describing this game is to give an illustration of how it is played. The first player thinks of “artichoke” and commences, “I apprenticed my son to a greengrocer, and the first thing he sold was an A.” Second Player—Apple? No.- „ Third Player—Almonds? No. Fourth Player—Asparagus? No. Fifth Player—Artichoke? Yes. The last player, having guessed correctly, may now apprentice his son. No player Is allowed more than one guess.

“COME WITH ME TO THE STATION HOUSE.