Jasper County Democrat, Volume 5, Number 36, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 13 December 1902 — A LITTLE NONSENSE. [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

A LITTLE NONSENSE.

Fresrt Supply of Humor From the Yonkers Statesman. She—Hair is very strong. A single hair will bear a weight of 1,150 grains. He—Yes, and I’ve known one to raise a terrible row in a family. Patience—l like to see a cook know her place. Patrice—Yes; but usually Bhe doesn’t stay long enough in it to know it. He (still talking)—Conversation is an art, you know. She (yawning)—Yea, and there are so many people who are in love with their art. _ Bacon—Did you ever see one of these attachments they put on to a piano to make it go? Egbert—Oh, yes; the sheriff put one on my piano. Church—l see anthracite parties are to be popular this winter. Gotham—What on earth is an anthracite party? “Why, each one contributes a quarter, and the amount goes to buy a piece of coal, and all who contribute sit around and watch it burn.” Origin of the Boundary Line Dispute.

“Aw, git on yer own side o’ de bed 1”

Counter Confidences. “Liz,” confided the girl at the ribbon counter, “you know I told you 1 got engaged to a German count at the summer hotel?” “Yes.” “Well, he isn’t a count at all. He is a cashier in a dairy lunchroom down street.” “Ain’t that nice, though? You’ll get to see him this winter again. I was lucky too. The millionaire’s son I fell in lovo with drives a delivery wagon for this store.”— Judge. Bslng a Czar. The czar of ull the Russia* rose from his repose. “We will have coffee,” he said. “I regret, sire,” returned the gentleman of the bathrobe, “that the coffee is not good this morning.” “So?” “In faet, sire, it has already poisoned three gentlemen in waiting.” “Then,” said the czar, “we must do without. Have the cook discharged from a cannon.”— Newark News.