Jasper County Democrat, Volume 5, Number 27, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 11 October 1902 — CONDENSED STORIES. [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

CONDENSED STORIES.

What Senator Platt Has 0 Learned About Newspaper Making. Senator Platt of Connecticut aavs that he has learned one great truth about the newspaper business after many years of reading them. 'A number of newspaper men, says the Washington Post, went in to see him after a meeting of the committee on Cuba to learn what had been accomplished toward the Teller investigation. Senator Platt made a yery brief statement regarding the proposal to call President Ilavemeyer and others of the sugar trust, and it was suggested to him that a little more detail would be acceptable, as a column story on the subject would be desired by the newspapers. Hr. Platt 6miled quizzically at Hie newspaper men a moment and then told of his great trutlu “The newspapers are not interested in anything that is completed. lYou want a column about a subject that has not yet developed, but when I looked in the newspapers this morning to see what they said about the agreement on the Cninose exclusion bill I could find almost hothing.” The newspaper men agreed with him.

Joked a Future Senator. Ex-Senator Edward 0. Wolcott established a law and real estate office with his brother in Georgetown, Colo., at the outset of his career, but as the law department of the concern was unprofitable he do-

cidetl to move on to a neighboring camp, where silver had been struck, lie packed his belongings on a donkey and at the last moment decided to take w ith him the firm’s old sign, “Ed Wolcott <& Bro./’ which had just Wn replaced by a new one. When he arrived at his destination, the miners gathered around and looked him over, staring hard at the sign strapped on the donkey. “Say, young teller,” drawled one of them, “which of you all is Ed ?’* Stockton’s Famous Riddle. Frank It. Stockton’s famous story, ‘The Lady or the Tiger?” set everybody guessing. It was a topic of conversation when Mr. Stockton met Kudvard Kipling at a reception and informed the latter that he contemplated going to India. “I’m glad to hear it!” exclaimed Kipling enthusiastically. “I know just what we'll do with you over Jthere when we get you away from your friends and family. We’ll lure you out into the jungle and have you seized and bound by our trusty wallahs. We’ll have you turiu'd on your hick and got one of our biggest elephants to stand, over you with his fore foot poised above your head. Then I’ll say in my most insinuating way, ‘Come now, Stockton, which was it—the lady or the tiger ?’ ” It was told that on enterprising magazine manager offered him $lO,000 if lie would reveal the true end of the famous tale, but Stockton was true to his story and declined tho offer.

HU Eminence “Martin Kelly.” Cardinal Marthadli learned English hi Dublin, Ireland, and speaks it with tlie soft, mellow brogue of the educated Irishman from that part of the Emerald Isle. The cardinal tells a good story about his accent. Shortly after his arrival in this country an old woman called at the delegation upon some matter of minor importance and was granted an audience with the affable apostolic delegate. Then she startled tho people of Washington by assuring them that tho new delegate waa on Irishman. “indeed, them he is Irish,” Bhe said, “because I heard him talk. And, euro, isn’t his name Martin Kelly?” It is quite a joko now among ct>clesiaeties to allude to his eminence as Martin Kelly.—Washington Cor. New York .World.

"SAY, YOUNG FELLER, WHICH OF YOU ALL IS ED?"