Jasper County Democrat, Volume 5, Number 24, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 20 September 1902 — No Man’s Slave. [ARTICLE]

No Man’s Slave.

“There’s a girl who would rather remain single than be the slave of any man.” “But isn’t she afraid of being lonesome ?” “Oh, no. She is too busy on her great book. ‘How to Manage a Husband.’ -1 letroit Free Press. Business Head. “You ought to have been ashamed to take money for that mule.” “I was kind of ’shamed,” answered Mr. Erastus Pinkley. “I was mighty glad to git shed of him. But I was afraid dat if 1 offered him to you fo’ nutfin’ you’d git suspicious.”—Washington Star.

A Just Indignation. “I understand Miss Searan Yellough in a fit of anger yesterday smashed a hundred dollar mirror in her room.” “Don’t blame her, considering the character of reflections it had been casting on her.”—Baltimore News.

His Preference. “Which side of your face would you rather have shown in the picture?” asked the photographer. “The outside,” answered the sitter, who had heard of the advance made in X ray photography.—Baltimore American.

Discovered. Teacher—Now, Ethel, who wrote the “Elegy In a Country Churchyard ?” Ethel—Please, ma’am, it was Willie Smif. I seen him goin’ in the churchyard at recess, ma’am.—Chicago News.

Plagiarism. “1 with,” said the literary hack, “that I could sell all I write.” “And 1 wish,” replied the e*’ tor, who had discovered something, "that you wrote all you sell.”—Phi! del* phia Press.

And Wouldn’t Hurt So Much. George—They say that girl you used to call on has very large feet. Paul—Well, they’re not as large as her father’s, at any rate.—Chelsea (Mass.) Gazette.

Safe Advice. “Do you ever advise your patients to take exercise, doctor?” “Oh. yes; it’a perfectly safe to do •o. They never take it.”—lndia** apolis "Nawa.