Jasper County Democrat, Volume 5, Number 1, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 12 April 1902 — The Comic Side of The News [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

The Comic Side of The News

Gen. Miles figures thnt at his salary he should not be purely ornamental. Canada is waiting around to be n sister of Cuba if we deny the relationship. No donbt Great Britain would be pleased to retire the Boer war on au old age pension. Borne time ago this country was going to build an isthmian canal in about a minute. It seems to be getting over it* hurry. According to Gen. Otis the Filipino insurgents put in their spare time reading Senator Hoar's speeches. It will take a good deal longer time to get the money back from the Sultan than it did to get it to the bandits. The Missouri river is on Its annual rampage and Omaha must wait uptil the floods roll l»y before it will know for certain whether it is in lowa or Nebraska. John Dillon, who has been suspended from the House of Uotnmomf for calling Jowp|) Chamberlain several kinds of a liar, may have mislaid his book of synonym*.