Jasper County Democrat, Volume 4, Number 37, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 21 December 1901 — CONDENSED STORIES. [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

CONDENSED STORIES.

When John Meech Carried His Audience With Him. A standing joke for years among "actors has been an expression about carrying an audience along with one’s company. “I shall carry my own band and orchestra with me next season,” says a manager in discussing his plans. “Better carry your own audience, too,” replies a listener. But there is on record one example of a manager’s doing that very thing. Sortie years ago John H. Meech put on his son as a star in an old comedy called “Arabian Nights.” The performance was bad, and the audiences were grotesquely small. But Meech was undaunted. He had decided to bring his son before the public notice or die in the attempt. The last stand of the tour was Lancaster, N. Y., a village of about 3,000 population lying ten miles outside of Buffalo. The day of the performance Meech came to a young man in Buffalo named Everson and requested his presence at the performance. So Everson journeyed to Lancaster. When he entered the theater, there were about 200 persons, all in evening dress, in the house. Everson afterward said that he never saw a worse performance in his life and never a more enthusiastic audience. Almost every line met with a heartv laugh or boisterous applause. At the conclusion of each act the performers were called before the curtain. Still wondering, Everson walked out to the front of the house after the performance. Meech met him and told him that two special trolley cars were waiting to take the audience home. “Are all these people going back to Buffalo tonight?” asked Everson. “Oh, yes,” answered Meech. “I brought them with me. I was bound to have an audience.” “Well, what—what were the actual receipts tonight, if I may ask ?”i& continued Everson. “Two dollars and twenty-five cents,” replied Meech. “You see, I couldn’t charge my guests.” And the entire audience entered the cars that Meech had chartered and returned to Buffalo. Two Thing* In His Favor. Mark Twain, says a London newspaper, was dining lately with a literary dining club in London, one of whose rules is that each member should introduce his guests formally and in set phrase to the company. This unusual custom appealed to Twain, and when it came to his turn to return thanks he referred to it eulogisticallv. “I like it,” he drawled, “for it reminds me of a time 1 lectured in a little town in the Rockies. Mv chairman was a well to do ‘cow puncher,’ who found the situation evidently irksome. ‘l’m told I must introduce this yer man tye, boys,’ he said, ‘but I can only see two things in his favor. One is that he’s never been in jail and the other is that I don’t know why,’ and then he sat down,” as Mark Twain did. A Practical Joke. One of the most popular playwrights in Paris was recently a victim of a practical joke. In order to get peace and quietness to finish a play he went to a country town. At the station, to his astonishment, he was received with hooting and also

cordial shakes of the hand from a crowd of entire strangers. He found his villa surrounded by a great throng, and his appearance was the signal for hooting and cheering. In despair he went to the mayor of the town, who calmly informed him that he was Dreyfus in disguise. Slept While the Kaiser Preached. Emperor William of Germany preaches sermons occasionally on board his yacht, the Hohenzollern, and the story is told that a sailor was once brought to book for sleeping during the royal sermon. “On, let the poor fellow off,” said tho kaiser when the matter was brought before him. “He has been punished enough already. Besides, it wasn’t much of a sermon, nnvhow,”

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