Jasper County Democrat, Volume 4, Number 37, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 21 December 1901 — Page 5

A LITTLE NONSENSE.

Dead Johnny’s Sister After Alt Hie Christmas Presents. Missionaries to faroff lands, and especially those who have labored among people whose principal article of diet is rice, are apt to refer to their lukewarm converts as “rice Christians,” because the converts so termed care much more for t!ie material than the spiritual food that the missionaries dispense. Something of the same spirit animates Christians, young and old, in this corner of the world, particularly at time, and among the younFger element when Christmas trees r and gifts are in order. The story told recently by a Sunday school teacher is an illustration. A couple of weeks before Christmas one of the small boys in this teacher’s class contracted pneumonia and died. He wma much beloved, and his death was felt by his classmates and the workers in the school. His name was on the list for a handsome gift at Christmas, and the superintendent of the school decided that it would be a graceful thing, and the boy’s family would doubtless appreciate the act, if the gift set apart for the boy were sent to his home, to be given to a younger brother or disposed of as his parents thought fit. When the gift distribution was in progress, a sister of the little fellow, also an attendant at the school, was asked to take his gift home. She received it in silence and stood around with an expectant air. At last the teacher remarked: “What is it you are waiting for, Lucy? You have received your gifts and Johnny’s also.” “Yes’m, I know; but doesn’t Johnny get a box of candy too?” Johnny’s sister got the candy. Brooklyn Eagle. Too Much Faith. “So the glasses don’t help your eyes at all?” “Not a bit And the fellow that sold ’em to me told me they surely would.” “And you believed him?” “Of course I believed him. What do you think I’d better do about the matter?” “Oh, there ain’t anything to do about the glasses you’ve got, but before you buy any more you’d better take the faith cure.”—Chicago Post. The Way to a Woman’s Heart.

First Tramp—Why, ’ow did she come to give you so much as a shillin’? Second Tramp—She arst me ’ow old I wuz, and I told her I wuz old enough to be her grandfarver. Pure Sympathy. “That Mr. Berrien you introduced me to is a very sympathetic man.” “Think so?” “Yes, indeed. I was telling him about a neighbor of mine who is dangerously ill, and he said he’d call right away and leave his card.” “Yes, Mr. Berrien is an undertaker, you know.”—Philadelphia North American. Alluring. ! “Charley, dear,” said young Mrs. Torkins, “I wish you would let me go where the bookmakers are.” "Into the betting ring ?” “Yes. I saw it from a distance. The way those people are hustling and jamming one another makes me think that there must be some splendid bargains there.” —Washington Star. Her New Recipe. Mrs. Brownley-Bopgs—Mary, the salad was particularly delicious tonight. What did you use in it? Mary—l used them new kind o’ yaller cabbages that Mr. John sent home, mum. Mrs. 8.-B. (faintly) Heavens, those were chrysanthemums!—Chicago News. Really Very Simple. “Teacher says that ‘boom’ can’t be compared,” said the little one. “Can it ?” asked her mother. “Why, of course,” was the reply. “Positive,boom; comparative, boomer; superlative, boomerang.” “Correct,” said her father promptly.—Chicago Post. The Naked Truth. It was an extremely formal wedding. “I didn’t see you there,” said rto Love later. “No,” said Love; “I wasn’t dress-’ ed for it.”—New York Sun.

FOR SHUFFLING CARDS.

A card shuffling machine has been, invented bw R. F. Bellows of Cleveland. It should make business poor for crooked card players. The device is complicated, yet simple in its action. The shuffling machine is a metal' box about 12 inches high, 3 inches wide and 6 inches from front to back. All the mechanism is inside. The cards are dropped in at the top and rest on a tiny shelf. Below this there are five small fingers, one on each of five thin steel blades extending across the full width of the machine. When a shutter on the front is dropped, the shelf falls and the cards drop upon the blades and are separated into five little irregular bunches by the fingers. The blades separate, and one by one cards drop from the various bunches into a receptacle at the bottom, the drop being regulated by a clockwork mechanism. There is now way of telling where any particular card will be found in the pack after they are shuffled. The same card, placed on the top of the pack, will rarely be found twice in the same place after the shuffle.—Chicago Inter Ocean.

Sulphuric Acid For Snake Bites.

Those who fear snakes or live where snakes are found will find comfort in the assurance of Dr. John H. Henry of Montgomery that sulphuric acid is a specific. Dr. Henry says: “The poison of animals and snakes is intensely alkaline, and sulphuric acid taken internally and injected hypodermically, diluted or pure, in the fang puncture immediately kills the poison. This discovery was given by a gentleman who says he has been bitten by snakes and insects over a hundred times. This gentleman takes delight in keeping snakes in his room running all about. Six weeks ago he was bitten in the foot by his big rattler. He imihediately used hypodermically the acid, and it did not swell or give him any trouble. He says he fears no poison of animal, snake or insect bites if he has his acid with him.”—New York Times.

Fiddles Without Hands.

In Atlanta, a small town in Dlinois, lives Frank Clawson, a fiddler whose chief bid for fame lies in the fact that he is without hands. Several years ago he was caught in a blizzard, and both hands were so badly frozen that they were amputated at the wrist. Being somewhat of a mechanical genius, he evolved a contrivance out of heavy wire which enabled him to wield the bow. The matter of fingering was more difficult, but by hard practice he trained the stump of his left hand to make the necessary shifts from one string to another and from position to position. With the fiddle held in place by his chin and knees and with the help of his fingerless arms Clawson manages to play the old time airs with nearly as j.iueh success as formerly.

An Unfinished Sentence.

Shortly after President Roosevelt entered the White House a politician called upon him with reference to appointments. After the preliminary expressions of high esteem, unbounded admiration and eternal loyalty he began to disclose his business. “I want to speak to you about Mr. Blank, who holds a small office down in my district”— The politician didn’t finish his sentence. “What!”exclaimed Roosevelt, interrupting him. “Is that infernal scoundrel still in that place? I had some knowledge of him when I was a civil service commissioner.” The politician acknowledged that Mr. Blank was still there and then turned the subject.

Two Quarrelsome Women.

A novel method of suppressing two quarrelsome women has just been adopted in Wilkesbarre, Pa. Day after day they quarreled over their back fence, and their scoldings so annoyed the neighbors that a sixteen foot fence has been erected between their houses. It was put up the other night by masked men and a warning was posted that it should not be torn down. The women were unable to see each other, but they found a hole in the fence and made remarks through that. Then a committee waited on them and said if they quarreled any more they would be driven out of town.

Entirely Willing.

John L. Sullivan was in the North station the other day and, seeing a little Irish baggage man coming along with a bicycle, squared off at him with that easy humor for which he is noted. The little chap, who didn’t weigh over 135 pounus, put up his free hand. » “Wait on a bit,” he said, “till Oi lean me bicycle against the rail.” John L. was so tickled he tipped back his head and roared. Then he told the pygmy who he waa.—Boston Journal.

FOR THE LITTLE ONES.

Master Harold and Hl* Cute Shetland Pony Colt. About two years ago I invested in a pair of Shetland ponies, with the idea, first, of pleasing the little boys, and, secondly, I thought they might be profitable to raise for market. I send you a photograph of the first pony bred and raised at Hickory Hill farm, shown at Fig. 333, with his young master, Harold Morse, aged three. This colt’s dam was less than three years old at the time the colt was foaled. She is thirty-eight inches tall and weighs about 300 pounds. At birth the

A PAIR OF FARM BABIES.

colt weighed twenty-seven pounds and was twenty-two inches tall. As far as we have found, the pure bred ponies are very docile and safe for the children. A very good illustration of this was an incident that occurred two days after this colt was born. I had turned the mare and colt in the back yard, and soon after we missed Master Harold. We found him in the attitude in which he appears in the picture. The mare was standing close over them, very watchful, but not at all inclined to be cross. This little mare is not a “fish cart” pony, though, by any means and can draw the two older boys, aged eight and eleven years, five miles an hour and has made one trip of twenty miles in a day this fall. The boys have broken a two-year-old this summer to drive to the cart, and it is hard telling which learned the more, the boys or the pony. I also have learned a few things about ponies and some about men too. I have found that some of the mares are nonbreeders and also that it is well to have a certificate of registry come with the pony, or he may grow and grow and grow until he is just an undersized horse, too small for a horse and too big for a ponv. Dealers in this class hurt the sale of real ponies, because they offer their stock at low prices and cause dissatisfaction among those who buy. —J. Grant Morse in Rural New Yorker.

Leaf Bud*. Do you know, dear children, that new branches are developed from I buds growing in the joints of leaves, called axillary buds? As the branch pushes out it bears a bud upon the end of it, called the terminal bud. Each branch is the result of a bud which starts out in the joint and pushes its way until it becomes a branch and in turn helps form a new bud. Mary Dennis says in a “Study of Leaves:” “Some people pride themselves upon their skill in packing trunks, but Mother Nature excels all her children in this art. She uniquely folds away a gigantic oak in an acorn, and the mightiest branches are tucked up in a tinv bud.” Game* For Winter Evenings. Have you ever played “cards in the hat ?” Take an old high hat—or a deep bowl or basket about the size of a hat will do—place it upon the floor, stand at a point about ten feet from it—the distance is optional—and hold in your hands a pack of ordinary playing cards From the top di the pack take one card and toss it, or try to, into the bat. In like manner toss the others until the pack is gone. A card resting upon the rim of the hat counts half; those going in, one point each. Great skill may be acquired after practice, and when several are playing it is real sport A Unique Street Lamp. In London they have a street lamp which provides a stream of boiling water and dispenses tea, coffee and cocoa. The neat of the lamp warms the water and by dropping a cent in the slot a gallon of boiling water may be had. Two cents brings you milk, sugar, tea, coffee, etc. The light and heat are provided by the city, which co-oper-ates with a private corporation that furnishes the rest.

A Merry Can. ”1 can fly kite*. oh, awful high. Away up higher than the akyl” Thus Bobbieboy began. "You cant" Mid I, with a quick aurprtoe At Bobbteboy'a indignant eyea. Cried he, "I’m not a can!” Then, laughing at hl« queer mlrtake. • 1 eald: "My word I nerer break. So, Bobbieboy, my man. A '<■»»>’ you are. a ‘can’ were born, But yet a ’cau* we do not acorn. For you're A nwr-i-canl” —O. Herbert Clarke.

WOMAN IN THE KLONDIKE.

Just at dark we made a landing on the banks of the Yukon, directly in front of the little town of Dawson, and, pitching our tents in the snow, we camped for the night under our first shelter—even of a tent —for ten days. All were so pleased and happy that good fortune had enabled us to escape the perils which threatened, as well as the danger of an ice block, in the river, that the men proposed a celebration of their good fortune. They were going up town, but I told them it was not right to leave me alone the first night in a strange place and that if they would remain in camp I would pay for enough for them to drink and have their celebration in their tents. To this they agreed, and one of them went to the town and shortly returned, stating that whisky, Canadian case goods, was $lO a quart. I sent him back and purchased a couple of bottles, which the men drank without becoming boisterous. 1 then went to my war sack, and, taking out my guitar, which I had carried over the summit, we sat on the ground around the little tent stove and all joined in singing the songs of home.—Emma L. Kelly in Lippincott’s Magazine.

Got a Big Pearl With His Oysters.

Morgan H. Morgan, file clerk in the office of the clerk of the circuit court, in company with several friends, lunched in a restaurant at Clark and Randolph streets, and, among other things, the entire party partook of fried oysters. Morgan picked out a large, juicy one and was beginning io eat it with a relish when his teeth grated on a hard substance. He removed the object from his mouth and was about to tell the waiter that he had not ordered the oysters to lie seasoned with gravel when his attention was attracted by the reflection of the light upon the object he had thrown on the table. Investigation showed that it was a pearl of good size. Morgan put the pearl in his pocket and after leaving the restaurant went to the office of a lapidary in the Champlain building, where he was offered sl4 for the gem. He took the money. Chicago Inter Ocean.

Our Excess of Men.

Whatever differences Dame Nature may have intended between the spheres of influence of men and women, she evidently intended that numerically at least the two sexes should stand on nearly the same footing. The world over, except where recognizable and what might be called artificial causes interfere, the male and female elements of the population are about equal. Curiosity, not to say astonishment, is excited, therefore, by a recent announcement of the census bureau. The enumeration of 1900 shows that there are more men and boys than women and girls in this country and that the difference exceeds 1,800,000 in a population of 76,303,387. The excess appears more distinctly perhaps when it is said that there are 512 males and only 488 females in every thousand people in the United States.—Chicago Tribune.

Sixty Dollar Overcoats For Soldiers.

Just at present a buffalo overcoat is a very scarce article, and yet the humblest of Uncle Sain’s soldier boys may have one of these highly Srized garments for the asking. All e has to do is to include the item in his requisition for supplies, and the coat will be issued to him, although it will still belong to the government, and if he loses or destroys it he must pay S6O for his carelessness. The coats in the possession of the war department are relics of the days when no man living in the northwest was thought to be properly eouipped without a buffalo coat. All of them have been worn, but they are still in fair condition and are issued annually to those soldiers . who may want them.—Minneapolis Journal.

He Walked.

An insurance officer who claims ■ to be the only man in his business who ever talked business tt> J. PierSont Morgan remarked the other ay: “I could more easily see the hundred hardest men in San Francisco than do it again. Never mind how I did it. I walked in on Morgan at the office one day and stated my business. “ ‘How did you get in here ? said he. “ ‘I waited in,’ said I. “ ‘Well, walk out,’ said he. “I 1

Leap Years In This Century.

The twentieth century will have . the greatest number of leap years ■ possible for a century namely, twenty-five. The year 1904 will be the first one, then every fourth year after that up to and including the . year 2000. February will three times have five Sundays—in 1920, 1948 and 1976.

CONDENSED STORIES.

When John Meech Carried His Audience With Him. A standing joke for years among "actors has been an expression about carrying an audience along with one’s company. “I shall carry my own band and orchestra with me next season,” says a manager in discussing his plans. “Better carry your own audience, too,” replies a listener. But there is on record one example of a manager’s doing that very thing. Sortie years ago John H. Meech put on his son as a star in an old comedy called “Arabian Nights.” The performance was bad, and the audiences were grotesquely small. But Meech was undaunted. He had decided to bring his son before the public notice or die in the attempt. The last stand of the tour was Lancaster, N. Y., a village of about 3,000 population lying ten miles outside of Buffalo. The day of the performance Meech came to a young man in Buffalo named Everson and requested his presence at the performance. So Everson journeyed to Lancaster. When he entered the theater, there were about 200 persons, all in evening dress, in the house. Everson afterward said that he never saw a worse performance in his life and never a more enthusiastic audience. Almost every line met with a heartv laugh or boisterous applause. At the conclusion of each act the performers were called before the curtain. Still wondering, Everson walked out to the front of the house after the performance. Meech met him and told him that two special trolley cars were waiting to take the audience home. “Are all these people going back to Buffalo tonight?” asked Everson. “Oh, yes,” answered Meech. “I brought them with me. I was bound to have an audience.” “Well, what—what were the actual receipts tonight, if I may ask ?”i& continued Everson. “Two dollars and twenty-five cents,” replied Meech. “You see, I couldn’t charge my guests.” And the entire audience entered the cars that Meech had chartered and returned to Buffalo. Two Thing* In His Favor. Mark Twain, says a London newspaper, was dining lately with a literary dining club in London, one of whose rules is that each member should introduce his guests formally and in set phrase to the company. This unusual custom appealed to Twain, and when it came to his turn to return thanks he referred to it eulogisticallv. “I like it,” he drawled, “for it reminds me of a time 1 lectured in a little town in the Rockies. Mv chairman was a well to do ‘cow puncher,’ who found the situation evidently irksome. ‘l’m told I must introduce this yer man tye, boys,’ he said, ‘but I can only see two things in his favor. One is that he’s never been in jail and the other is that I don’t know why,’ and then he sat down,” as Mark Twain did. A Practical Joke. One of the most popular playwrights in Paris was recently a victim of a practical joke. In order to get peace and quietness to finish a play he went to a country town. At the station, to his astonishment, he was received with hooting and also

WAS RECEIVED BY A CROWD.

cordial shakes of the hand from a crowd of entire strangers. He found his villa surrounded by a great throng, and his appearance was the signal for hooting and cheering. In despair he went to the mayor of the town, who calmly informed him that he was Dreyfus in disguise. Slept While the Kaiser Preached. Emperor William of Germany preaches sermons occasionally on board his yacht, the Hohenzollern, and the story is told that a sailor was once brought to book for sleeping during the royal sermon. “On, let the poor fellow off,” said tho kaiser when the matter was brought before him. “He has been punished enough already. Besides, it wasn’t much of a sermon, nnvhow,”

ALL OVER THE HOUSE.

Something About Rugs, Which Have Displaced Carpets. Rugs have largely displaced carpets in American homes of recent years. i The modern hygienic housewife insists upon having movable floor coverings because they can be kept so much cleaner. For people who rent, too, ruga are found in the long run to be cheaper, because with a change of residence they can be more easily fitted than a carpet to the new floors. There are a few facts which the woman who buys rugs for her house needs to know. Persian rugs lead all the rest in artistic design aswell as coloring. Ten dollars i» what a square foot of the best Persian rug is worth, and it took a single weaver twenty-three days to complete that portion. The Turkish rugs from Siwas are made of wool and are woven in almost every hamlet and home. Every poor family has as a part of their house furnishings rugs which are very valuable, but which they will not part with except in time of the direst need. The Smyrna rugs are comparatively inferior in quality. Their name is derived f.om the mart to which they are brought for They are made in the interior from the Angora goat’s coarse hair. Yuruk rugs are made by a band of nomads in the mountains of Anatolia. These are rugs of firm, even texture woven from the wool of the fine flocks of sheep. A Nut Pudding. A rich and delicious dessert and one easily served, which is a great consideration, is a nut pudding. To make it beat separately the yolks and whites of six eggs. To the yolks add one and a half cups of granulated sugar, and to the whites, beaten to the stiffest possible froth, add three cups of finely chopped or pounded nuts. Hazelnuts, pecans or almonds are equally good. Mix all together lightly and stir in one teaspoonful of vanilla. Then, last of all, sift in one teaspoonful of baking powder well mixed in one tablespoonful of flour. This is to be baked quickly iu I jelly cake tins and when ready to serve is to be put together like layer cake with whipped cream. A pint - of this thoroughly chilled and seasoned with flavoring or brandy will be sufficient to put between layers and over the top and sides. \ Fruit For Rheumatism. The use of fruit diminishes acicTi ity and antagonizes rheumatism. The acids in fruits undergo changes which diminish the acidity of the blood and aid in the elimination of rheumatic acid. The most digestible fruits are ripe grapes, peaches, strawberries, apricots, oranges, very ripe pears, figs, dates, baked apples and stewed fruits. A dietary consisting wholly of fruits is a valuable means of overI coming biliousness. Such a dietary may be maintained for one or two days a week. A modified fruit dietary is highly beneficial. The most laxative fruits are apples, figs, prunes and peaches.— Family Doctor. Preparing Glue For Ready Use. To any quantity of glue use common whisky instead of water. Put both together in a bottle, cork it tight and set it by for three or four days, when it will be fit for use without the application of heat. Glue thus prepared will keep for years and is at all times fit for use,, except in very cold weather, when it should- be set in warm water before using. To obviate the difficulty of the stopper getting tight by the glue drying in the mouth of the vessel use a tin vessel with the cover fitting tight on the outside to> prevent the escape of the spirit by evaporation. A strong solution of isinglass made in the same manner is an excellent cement for leather.. Lemonade. If you have never tried making* lemonade with boiling water, you have missed a valuable household hint.. Try it now by squeezing the juice from three large lemons into an earthenware bowl. Add two tablespoonfuls of granulated sugar and the grated rind of one lemon, turn in four cupfuls of boiling water and cover closely. When cool, place it in the icebox to chill. For Tea. Sardine toast is an excellent relish for luncheon or tea. Cut oblongs of good toasting bread from which all crust is removed, brown and spread with butted, to which minced parsley and a few drops of lemon juice have been added. The sardines are carefully drained, and the loose pieces of skin are wiped off before they are spread on the toast and served.