Jasper County Democrat, Volume 4, Number 13, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 6 July 1901 — PULSE of the PRESS [ARTICLE]

PULSE of the PRESS

Earl Russell may find that our divorces are too fragile for export purposes.—Detroit News. Why can’t we trade Dr. John Alexander Dowie for Aguinaldo or the Sultan of Sulu?—Topeka Journal. After all, Montana politics apftear to be quite decent -when placed in comparison with the Pennsylvania article.—Topeka Journal. In certain cases a sheriff with a backbone is worth more than the three brunches of a State government.—Detroit Free Press. And now the New Jersey Supreme Court gets into line, declaring street railway franchises taxable, same as real estate.—Detroit Free Press. The mothers’ congress of Michigan appears to have run short of mothers again, so elected a spinster to lead their efforts.—Detroit Free Press. The Mayor of Pottsville, Pa., started out with an ax the other day and chopped down the billboards that disfigured the streets;—Denver Post. Judging from the action of the grand jury, Chicago is about as congenial a place in which to do business as Dowie could find.—Detroit Free Press. Cuba's population may be turbulent, but we don't remember having heard of either lynchings or Pennsylvania charter grabs in the island.—Detroit News. There is no greater w’onder of the world than the marvel of the evolution of city transportation as seen in American streets. —Grand Rapids Press. What will it profit J. Pierpont Morgan to gobble the earth? He can’t take it away with him, and his doctor won't let him eat anything.—Topeka Journal. Mr. De Lima appears to be about the only one who is thoroughly satisfied with the decision of the Supreme Court. He gets his money back.—Rochester Herald. The King of England is a deuced lot more particular about the domestic records of women acquaintances than the Prince of Wales ever was.—Detroit News. Dr. Dowie neglects to add, however, that he was also undoubtedly the party that caused a sensation in natural history circles by conversing with Balaam. —Grand Rapids Press. Dowie has got it into his head that the Chicago doctors want to kidnap him. It is difficult to understand what they would with him unless they wish to examine his gall.—Topeka Journal. It seems strange that nobody ever thought of applying to The Hague arbitration commission to intervene in the war between the Salvationists and the Volunteers. —Topeka Journal.

If John Bin. will audit his war ae count carefully he will see that it would be a strok of economy to stop the war and give every surviving Boer a farm and a life pension.—Philadelphia Ledger. Sam Jones, the evangelist, started In with a salary of S3OO a year. Now his income is estimated at SI,OOO a month. There is no disputing the fact that advertising pays. —Buffalo Times. “Dr.” Dowie says he does not know he has a head. That’s getting nearer to facts than anyone expected. And now. will be acknowledge that he has not any organ except a gall?—St. Paul Dispatch. In a Missouri county a murder trial is beiug conducted in the open air to accommodate the attending crowds. The same desirable facilities will no doubt be offered the people to see the hanging.— Denver Post. That California woman who, on account of her children, stopped a paper that had on several occasions printed the word “hell,” should also see that ■here are no Bibles lying around loose an her home.—Denver Post. It is much pleasanter to joke over night clothes, sweaters, horse blankets and bath robes in connection with the burning of the West Baden hotel than it would be to make appropriate comments upon a tragedy.—Detroit Free Press. The groat battle of the century is now to be waged, the combatants being science and civilization against the mosquito. Tiie advantage.of force is with the alliance, but, then, the mosquito has the skill and training.—Baltimore American. Fred Funston says that octopus steak is the toughest proposition he ever tackled. He was born too late to dine from mules that bad outlived their freight wagon usefulness, ns our soldier boys of the Civil War were sometimes compelled to do.—Denver Post. The most wonderful story of Kentucky chivalry over published is thaj of Col. “Jack” Chinn, the celebrated fighter who was with Goebel when the latter was assassinated. Col, Chinn has sworn off from drinking whisky because his wife asked him to. And he is a man of his word.—Buffalo Tinies. In denning out Pekin it must be admitted that the allies also cleaned it up. They considerably reduced the death rate and put the entire place in a very fair sanitary condition. Civilization may advance with a gun and a plunder bag, but there is always a cake of soap concealed aliont her person.—Cleveland Plain Dealer. “Home is the thing men fight for. No man would go to war to defend a boarding house.” This is one of the pithy things said by a delegate to the congress of mothers. It describes the Transvaal situation in n nutshell, nnd explains better than a volume of exposition the secret of thfit determined resistance to English conquest.—Anaconda Standard. So many government officials are engaged in writing for the magazines and newspapers that the people will noon bOgjn to wonder when they find the time to attend to the duties for which they are paid out of the public treasury.— Washington Post. Since his death it has been fottnd that the supposed-to-bave-beou murdered Millionaire William M. Rice of New York has two sisters living in lowa. Both are widows.' are over TO years old, and both bare had to support themselves taking in washing. If Rice was not mnrdereA ho ought to hare been.- Buffalo Time*.