Jasper County Democrat, Volume 4, Number 12, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 29 June 1901 — Told of the Marines. [ARTICLE]

Told of the Marines.

A marine captain, desiring to reprimand some chronic growlers in his corps, arranged for complaints to be made after morning parade. During parade, having previously noted the grumblers, he ordered them to tighten their helmet chin-straps by four links. Of course they obeyed. When complaint time came the men could not open their mouths! “Faith, the cap’n’s an alsy man intirely,” said one, whose sense of fun was proof against tightened straps, “glvln’ us iv’rythlng we ast for the mornin’!” An orderly officer, on a day when chin-straps were loose, asked the stereotyped question: “Any complaints?” “Yes, sir, the spuds ain’t done,” answered the marine. “What?” said the subaltern. “The spuds, sir,” repeated the man. “What does he mean, sergeant?” asked the puzzled young officer. “Oh, he be Ignorant, sir,” returned the sergeant. “He means taters.”