Jasper County Democrat, Volume 3, Number 44, Rensselaer, Jasper County, 9 February 1901 — THE POOR HEATHEN. [ARTICLE]

THE POOR HEATHEN.

Let us go and find the heathen; let us taks him by the hand; Let us take his .evil from him; let us also take his land; Let ut break it to him gently that it’s wrong to be so nude; And inculcate proper notions of the style, as it’s pursued. Let ur show him all the glories of the white man’Rkiugdom come. And, by way of Introduction, sell him lota of white man's rum. Let us seek our heathen brother in benighted lands afar. And impress him with the wYougness of his habits as they are; Let us guide him slowly, surely, till he's nobly civilized, And has banished all his foibles, all his . fancies, so despised; Let its show him how he's destined to go forward with u jump, Lest our grund, resistless progress takes him ’midship with a bump. Let us teach him that the bolo and the dagger are not right, When the seven-shooter follows up its barking with a bite; Let us bring to him the gospel of the shift and full-dress suit, And the g)ad and glorious tidlugs of the proper shoe or boot, Let us lift the poor old heathen from the bog wherein he sticks, And explain to him the beauties of the game of politics, Thus we’ll labor with the pagan till he understands our ways And will ponder with a shudder on his old uuhappy days. We will stock his land with clothing, we will dot it with golf links. And he'll hail the architecture of the home of fancy drinks; And we'll get the glory for it—for the good that we will do— All the grand, impressive glory—and we'll get his money, too. —Baltimore American.