Indiana State Sentinel, Indianapolis, Marion County, 8 August 1894 — Page 11

THE IN DI AM A STA Iii 2SKM1NEL, V JhlDNEöDA Y MO UN IN G. AUGUST 8, 1894 TWELVE PAGES.

Ii

A CONFIDENCE GAME.

CoL Trm Nodyne would never have followed Ponce de Ion; he believed that the Fountain of Youth flowed risrht In his native town of Riyfboruj?h, and was quite satisfied with lt quality and quantity. Should any one aak: "Why, colonel?" the answer Is that a former adjutant-general of th Mate had mustered several paper regiments with their headquarters In his trains; but furnished with Kalian t officers of veritable fKsh and blo.nl. and plenty of both, too, of whom Col. Tom was very miii-h one. Should this Inquisitive any one next Inquire, "Why, Tom?" the answer is to be read in his bonny, frank eyes, alight with merriment, despite a half century's beaming. A fine, poldlorly-appearlnir man was C1. Tom. In defiance of the upernumerary nature of his servloe; tall, erect, and spare, with elender gray mustaehlos. and Just the limb of a grizzly Imperial. A hearty, whole-souled m in was Col. Tom; If a flap on the back didn't announce his presence, hin Irresistible laughter excused the omission. He lived, as the conventional phrase goes, with his widowed sister, Mrs. Maltland; he was a lawyer by profession, according to another et expression; but eo breezy and original was his being that It might more properly be said that the world wa$ his home and humanity his vocation. A popular man was Col. Tom, and on a really rational basis. Should any one in Raysborough be asked: "Why do you like him so?" the answer probably would be: "Why not. he llks me!" And so he he did. he liked them all, and with all had established the Jolliest sort of a modus vivendi with a little feminine exception. For with the comfortable matrons and the plump spinsters who made up his sister's friends. Col. Tom was as chummy a possible, administering metaphorical digs in the ribs to mutual delight. But young girls, slender, tender, graceful young girls, large of eye3 and pallid of cheeks, and oh, so pensive of mien. these made him disconcerted. He hardly knew what to say, they might not unierstand a Joke, or, worse still, m'cht dete -t an unintended offense in it. They scarcely seemed real to h!rn. and yet he dared not seek tangible proof. J'erhaps, too, in their presence he became dimly eonsclou? of the contrast which his closely cropped white hair, and his sinewy, leathery hands silently demanded. Though independent of means. Col. Tom was always seeking money; though inofficious, he was ever busied with the concerns of others. In fact, his amiability, which should presage a gracious indolence, had led him into the house of bondage, or. rather, into several houses. He was here and there and everywhere, finding his rest in sleeping: cars, and scurrj'lns the country like the father of a lost child, lie had been persuaded, cajoled, bullied, and dragged into manifold benevolent and fraternal societies; and once in, was inevitably and unanimously elected grand almoner, supreme treasurer, exalted bursar, as the case mlpht be. Kleemosynary funds fairly poured into his keeping, to be disbursed by his gentleness 5ubjct only to the approval of his Judgment. Thus it happened tliut. for a man of leisure. Col. Tom. as he himself expressed it, was always on the jump: from his impulsiveness it followed that some day he would leap before he looked. Appropriately enough, this some day occurred at nifrht-tlme. One evening- in early summer Col. Tom was a.toiir.i a. special express returning home from the far West. lie had been on a missionary errand on behalf of a newly-projected home for week-kneed brethern. and the results of his rersuasive powers, in available fund3 and cash, were secured in a belt around hia waist. For Col. Tom had a fancy for ready money, which hia friends regrretted as a weakness. "There's a certain all-there sense about it," he was wont to say, apologetically. "One of these fine days there will be a certain not-there sense about it, niy sweet youth," Judpe Wanders had retorted, only the evening before, at the club at Susvllle. and Xevins and Browne and old Campbell had chuckled a?.ent. All very well, but ha knew what he wa3 about. dLd Cd. Tom! At 'this hour in question Col. Tom was stretched ac full length on the double seats of his section, if not dozing, at least musing audibly, He was conscious that the train had stopped, and than Marted again; but, he ruminated, special expresses always do start after lhay stop, and sometimes before. He was fully aroused, however, by hearing the sleeping car conductor shout interrogatively: "Col. Thomas Nodyne?" "Here!" responded the colonel promptly, as If his name were Newcomhe. That functionary, whose utility is in Inverse proportion to hi.s buttons, languidly fetchad a telegram, and then leaned againnt the Fide, as if he had earned the eternal Sabbaths of his rest. Col. Tom opened the dispatch, which was dated at "Poma," and read as follows: "Stop here. Am lyinp in mysu-ry. Ethel will meet you. Charles Judd Ooorne." The colonel dropped the she?t and gazed f-r a moment with laek-lustre eyes. "What a handsome, reckless, lavish face this name recalled. Charlie Osborn?, the only 5on of his next-ooor neighbor, and old friend, the roerue, the PCAjieciso:', who had left town between two sui and only just quick enorgh, dylr.g in ruvsery so far from home. Ah, what siiI'imw. what anjruish lay in those few worr.j, significant in their economical pan .-i'v. Of course, he would flop; Ierhaps the dying might be prevented, at all eents the misery could bo alleviated. Col. Tom sat bolt uprU'Tt fts If as;iiairid of the ease of his former position. "Con lc.. tor." he asked, "what sort of a p! a e is Poma?" "The one-hossiest town of a one-hoss Ftafe. sir." "Tb n why do we stop there?" "C'nections with s'west," replied the man with a "fan-me-please" look. "Hum. And what time are we due?" "ll:r.T." with a regretful gasp for the thre minutes' graop from midnight. "Thanks, that will do." And away tottered the official, with every waver of limb and fold of raiment indignantlyprotesting "I should say so." "I wonder -who Ethel is?" reflected the colonel. At 11:57, then. Col. Tom aliprhted at Poma. One glance assured Mm that the sample offered did not b'-lie the conductor's words, that is. if to be "onehoss" betokens a state of lonely instability. He was alone on a long board walk, a rafghty tangent to the riot of a station. Alone, yet no, for. as he was realizing that he must move some way and wondered which way was right, Fince either end was a hopeless distance, from the either, there was a timid touch on his arm. A young girl stood beside him, revealed by the dubious rays of the discouraged-looking lamps which brightened as they approached her. a young girl, clad in pcanty bl'ck, with a threadbare shawl wound tightly around her; a young girl with pallid cheeks and sweet, tremulous Hp?, and great, pleadinsr. infantile eyes, possessing in truth all the essentials to his discomfiture. "Oh, please," Fhe faltered, "Is this Col. Xodyne?" "At your service. Miss Madam," responded Col. Tom. "Oh. how good of you to come. Charlie said he knew you would, and I hated so to leave him, he's so low." "And you are" ".Ethel. Charlie's wife." answered the youn woman with touching dignity. "Poor child! Poor children! JSut let us hasten to him. Is it near by?" "We hav a farm on the outskirts, about ten miles distant. The dairy train over th re. which starts in a few minute, will take us to its bounds." And as they sat together in the desolate dinsy coach, little by little, through ym-

ptthetlc influence, did the colonel learn the hapless young wife's story; how ehe and Charlie had met and loved with the heedlessness and hope of ardent passion; h w her parents had opposed the wedding and discarded her after it; how, notwithstanding, in their poverty, they had managed to lease a little place and to subsist from the sale of product und milk, for through their very' hinplru.'s was their strength renewed; how the cuv hud stnyed. and Charlie. In following, h id fallen into a pit and injured him "It Internally, and then, how envious misfortunes had thronged and pressed; how their pjxirse belongings had g"ne for food and medicine, until but yesterday thö last of all. her pet one, a "teenty talnty" Iamb had been sold. A flmple tale, and simply told, as If the fragile fingers on the demure little lap that kept weaving to It were a child"; yet is not simplicity thej easenee of pathos? The colonel tugged uneas'.ly at hU grizzly mustachlos. and over thj touching details of that "teenty-talrty" lamb his throat gulped with an honest sob. And yet, even in the tlllng of these eorrows, a faint humor glimmered, betraying the sweet. joyou nature, overclouded, but not extinguished. "Poor Charlie." mused the colonel, and yet through his condolence the strange question flashed: "Ought he not to be content to die. since, indeed, he had lived?" Bre heir destination was reached Col. Tom, with compunction, caught himself picturing a future tn which he tenderly dried the widow's tears. The night was black and soft, starless, and hanging low with moisture, as the train rumbled away and left them on a spot possessing no other sign of civilization except the faint, dusty outline of crossroads. "Come this way. Col. Tom." cried the girl, blithely, and he long afterward remembered how he had acquired the persistent, unquenchable exuberance of her spirits. A little hand met his arid palm, as if with a kiss; such a warm, sentient little hand, thrilling with the satisfaction of home. Ah, Col. Tom. is this the true spirit of brotherly love toward your old neighbor's unfortunate wjii? Remember the tenth commandment. Col Tom! Along the country way, too obs-cure for shadows, they hurried side by side, over a level stretch, then down Into a ravine. And here once more the grill spoke, and her voice was as clear and penetrating as a mountaineer's call. "Here we are at last. Col. Tom." the exclaimed, "up thi bank to the right, through this

i clump of trees ha. ha. ha!" caressing ciing vanished from his hand, the rustle of drapery died away In the darkness. Instead, on either side Col. Tom was seized by an overpowering grasp, a cold rim of metal was pressed against his temple, a harsh voice commanded: "Silence, for your life!" as nimble fingers unbuckled the money belt under his waistcoat. Another rancorous order rumbled: "Remain where you are for a half hour at i your peril." There were hasty, retreat1 lng footsteps, and then Col. Tom stood alone in the silence and gloom. For a while he obeyed, for a good soldier will stand under fire, an impulse. an him. "Ethel! "Come back .to and then a sensation, emotion overwhelmed Ethel!" he shouted. nv. I forgive you. I don't care about the money. But you are too young, too innocent, oh. my God. to be with such villains! Come back, and I will take care of you!" And he rushed hither and thither like a blind man. distraught. Inclosing the trees in his futile embrace. Col. Tom awaited the dawn, and bitter thoughts gave speed to the hours. "There's no fool like an old fool," he soliloquized, "and of all fools I deserve to b the oldest. To think of it. that 1. with all my experience, with my knowledge of every form of trickery, from the 'Long Con. in England to 'Snatch Monte' in this country, should b done up and bunkoed by a damned no, no, I won't say that by a poor, sweet little girl. 'A teenty tainty lamb. and by Jove, I was well-nigh blubbering over lt. I only wish It were as cold as it is dark, and then this predicament would come near my deserts!" And yet into this long vigil there crept odd comforting memories. What a soft, tiny hand had clasped his own, so frankly, with such a warm kindly thrill! How confidingly that trim, graceful form had nestled against him as together they had penetrated the obscurity. "Come thi3 way. Col. Tom," she had called, oh, so blithely; ah. If now in the very acme of his chargrln, he could hear those tones, how willingly he would follow! And her laughter? Merry, certainly; like that of a child achieving some Innocent play; but without a trace of mockery or sinister triumph! "And I could have loved and cherished he like a father," murmured Col. Tom. and in the very utterance, recognized the "futility of such self-deception. The morning light danced over the hills as Jocund as Ethel's laughter. Col. Tom looked about him. He stood in the wellshaded approach to extensive grounds. At one side, but ai short distance away, was a lodge; and crowning the rising lawn was a mansion, capacious, attractive, as if extending both arms in welcome. For one moment Col. Tom hesitated. Here, within a few steps' termination lay much needed reft and Indignant consolation ; and more, the prospects of recovery and revenge. Lining the background he could see the neat cottages of laborers. Undoubtedly an alarm would quickly assemble a stout posse to scour the vicinity and run down the miscreants. Yes. he would show them that he wai mot to be trifled with. He laughed best who laughed last Ah! but could he laugh so merrily, could he laugh at all, if those pallid cheeks should grow ghastly from fright, if those deep, tender eye3 should gaze reproachfully on. him. Col. Tom buttoned hi3 coat tightly around him as if securing a newly-formed resolution, and turned his back on this tempting scene. After a few hour's peregrinations, never to be described in an article entitled, "The Delights of Pedestrianlsm." he reached a railway station and there succeeded in making out an elaborate Fchedule whereby he would, under providence, reach the eastern city whither he had to go before returning home. "Been stopping up at Squire Brownser?" asked the ticket agent. "Hum! Yet, no," faltered the ;olonel. "That is, near there." "Brownser's," murmured the colonel, as he stretched himself for a doze on the train. "I never heard that name before." It was a week later that Col. Tom entered his flster's home at Bayaborough with a dejection as profound as It wa? unusual. "Why, brother Tom," cried the widow, "what i3 the matter with you, you look to ill?" "Simply the ravages of old age, my dear." replied the colonel. " "What utter nonsense!" retorted ?dr. Maltland sharply, for she was but two years his junior; "whoever heard of a Xodyne growing old. and a young man like you! You are fagged, that you are, with your ridiculous junketings, for which you'll get no thanks, so don't -P'-ct any. You want a bath and a shave and fresh linen and a gold stiff toddy,' and you'll be back In you- prime again. Here," she continued, as her brother began a languid advance to his rooms, "here's an express package came for you; valuable, I guess, it's as full of sells fl3 Alaska." Col. Tom seized the parcel and hurried lip-stairs, a bewildering supposition calling his temples to trip even faster than his feet. It couldn't be; yot, with that stated valuation, what else could it be He broke the fastenings, he tore apart the wrappers, and behold! there was hl3 money-belt, wdth its precious contents intact; intact, but increased by a card bearing the inscription: "This Is oi:e on you, old man." Then Col. Tom pondered as he dutifully performed that remedial toilet recommended by his sister. Gradually it came over him tiat he had a reputation as a practical J-jker, and therefore was considered fair game. Gradually he recollected that he had boasted on the eve of his departure from Susville of his knowledge of the world, and how impossible It would be for him to be robbed. Come now, 1 t him think Just who were there? Judge Blander, of course, the

tried and true friend cf years, and ever anxious to rig him, but a bachelor, and without any young and charming relative. Xevins, a rare good fellow, but too thorough a whist player to engineer any such frivolity. OH Campbell, an octogenarian, with a willing spirit, but far too gouty flesh. Who then remained? Why, P.rowne, the new man. to whom he had taken so kindly, bluff, hearty, middle-aged, one of the boys. In fact. What had he heard about him? Why. he was a widower

with a perfect Hebe of a daughter, whom he treated like a chum; he had an e I tensive plantation in the southern part of the state, where he kept qen house In a roomy old mansion oh, oh! what a dolt he had been! Rrownsers, Browne's, Browne! Like a Latin adjective, by Jove! He had been led to the very threshold! lxubtless they had been awaiting hltn with a Jolly, good breakfast and jollier grins and Jokes. And he had steadfastly turned his back on such felicity out of compunction for a "teenty talnty lamb." and had Indulged in senile mourning ever since. Well. well, that sweet little girl, with her demure mockery had befooled him; aye. she had bewitched him, and he rejoiced in the magic. Perhaps he might And a cunning key to the casket of her heart. At all events, he had no paternal aspirations; no, not by the most emphatic kind of sight. The Nodyne never grew old, and he was the youngest of a long line of descendants." "There! What did I tell you?" said Mrs. Maltland, approvingly, us she mixed a peculiarly stiff decoction of her prophylactic. "You look like your own grandson from the very smell! and now, Tom. do promise me to abandon all thetie ridiculous trips. When a man simply has to settle down and be comfortable, why should he make a wandering Jew of himself?" "I shall follow your advice," agreed Col. Tom, "as soon as I return from theWest. I am called back on most important business." Ethel Browne strolled through the flower garden surrounding her home, not happy like the roses nor cheery like the pansles. but as pensive and downcast as the violets. For days past she had felt herself out of tune with the boisterous spirit of the household. The eternal laughter Irritated her, its subjects seemed so trivial, so inane. After all, there were some subjects too sacred for Jest. One should face the awful possibilities of life and death with grave, brave eyes, not a grin. One should be true, constant, self-denying, with a strong hand ar.d a sympathetic voice; a soldier In fact, with a slander, gray mustache, and Just the suspicion of a grizzly imperial; not simply funny, the must odious of qualities; not in truth a zany, fit only for a piebald suit. Could It iae that iOthel ws thus censuring her own father, the most indulgent of parents? After all, the nicst amiable of daughters is apt to be cross if disturbed in love's young dream. And, indeed, consternation was beginning to affect a certain' little coterie. It seemed that Col. Tom Nodyne had disappeared, was missing. Telegrams had come to Judge Blanders. to Xevins, to old Campbell, to Browne himself, from an eastern detective agency, asking s'iarjiy as to his whereabouts. A certain mysterious item had appeared in a Susvllle paper, of which each of them had received a marked copy. A joke was a joke, and no one knew it better than Col. Tom; but. by Jove, if carried too far, it might become a serious matter, a tragedy! He had not turned up at the house as they had expected, and when they had sought him at daybreak he was gone. Footpads were not unknown on that countryside. The colonel, of course, had plenty of money and a watch and studs. Suppose ah, "what gastly hypotheses crowded! What if, instead of a jovial reunion, there was a stripped, disfigured corpse in a pit? This very day Browne, the new man, sober, nervous, one of the boys no longer, had gone to Poma to meet his f ellw-congratulators in anxious consultation. To Ethel. In her disquiet reverie, came a servant. "There's a strange man, Miss, a askln" for your father." "Papa is away for the day." "An' so I told him. Miss. But he said then he'd see the lady of the house, and 'twas most important." "Very well." replied Ethel, glad, perhaps, to convert a little nervousness into dignity. "Show him here." The stranger approached a tall man in a very unnecessary greatcoat, and with a flowing beard adequately aiding a slouched hat In concealing his face. His voice was husky and harsh when he spoke, which he did without any hesitancy. "I may as well be above board and business-like," he began. "I'm a secret service agent piping a gent named Thomas Nodyne, supposed to have been foully dealt with. Do you know him?" "Piping a gent!" repeated Ethel, with startled look. "Thomas Nodyne!" "Yes. an oldish man. Col. Tom, they call him." "Col. Tom?" "Why yes," continued the agent, with an Involuntary gesture brushing back his hat. and squarely meeting her gaze. "You must remember him. 'Tis said he was kinder soft on you." Ethel turned a" ay for an instant. Was It really to pluck a flower or to hide the confusion of a sudden apprehension? At least in that delay she gained indifference and coldness. "Some friend of father's I presume," she replied. "He knows many nice old gentlemen; but you shouldn't expect me to keep a catalogue of such a chamber of horrors." "No." agreed the man. sadly. "I should have remembered that -age is nearer to death than to youth. Good day. Miss. I'll never trouble you again." and he turned away, a most dejected, discouraged type of a detective. "Col. Tom! Col. Tom!" cried Ethel, springing after him and laying that soft, sentient little hand on his arm, "I knew you by your eyes." "Then." exclaimed the colonel, as he swept away all incumbering disguises, "then you also know what my eyes say to you." "Perhaps," whispered Ethel, as she nestled in his embrace. N. Y. Times. FLY-CATCH I. .MICH. Their tue! and Antics In a Drug: More Miov 'Window. For something new in the way of a fly trap look in the window of a drug store at the corner of Tremont and Ellotsts. There, at almost any hour of the day and night, from one to four rodent quadrupeds can be seen prancing over bottles of tooth powder and sirup of squills and tincture of turpentine and sweet spirits of rhubarb and the other useful articles usually displayed in such places In a wild attempt to capture the musca domestica. The mice arc simply out fly-fishing. A card has been placed in the window which reads: "Fly Trap, Not for Sale." This was done after the doorstep had been worn half - way through by a line of people toming in to inform the clerks that the window was full of mice. The mice have been in the window for three years, says one of the clerks who has seen that length of service for the druggist; and he doesn't know how much longer. In the winter they get a living by gnawing off all the labels In the store that are gjued on with starchy paste. The mice by this time have become quite tame, but they never leave the window except when the store Is closed. They have proved themselves to be real conveniences. When the store gets unpleasantly full of flies, the clerks drive them Into the window, and then the mice have luncheon. People gather at these times Just as they do at the circus when the animals are fed. The best fun comes when the mice make after a horse-fly; there is a great race, and once caught the mice tear the flies' wings off and bolt everything else. In this way a great pile of wings has accumulated. The mice can eat glass, considering bluebottle flies a luxury. The recreation of these mice consists in running up and down the curtain cord at a lightning pace, causing th residents of the neighboring saloons to rub their eyes and Anally to avoid that nlde of the street altogether. The druggist long ago threw away his cat, and speaks of the manufacture of fly paper as a lost art Boston Transcript.

DO YOU SPEAK ENGLISH?

i in.- vriT Tnn in n vnr inr.s THAT ACCOMPLISIIMUVr. It- rienrilnir Thla Article Ton Will DIm'omt Tim I You May lie MUtnken In it .ol Many Inntninr There la More eeil of m. Urform In the Pronunciation Thun In Ihr Spelling of Our I.nngiiiiae I'.rrnra Which Are of Common Occurrence Among Intelligent I'emona. To decide a wager a dozen men. mostly lawyers of distinction, were asked to read aloud a sentence In whloh the ' word "spontaneity" held an inconspicuous place. More than half read It "rpontanighlty." The discoverer of this pernicious laxity, says the New York Sunday Advertiser, Is a young lawyer who has induced a numler of the younger members of th? Liwyers' club to vows of reformation in the matter of pronunciation. "Tnere is more need of a rsform in Engllf-h pronunciation than in Kng'dh spelling," he said yesterday. "I do not care to advertise myself as a reform cr.tnk, but I saw an examination paper at the custom house that made me tremble for the future of the English tongue. One of the applicant who was examined by tbe local board for a place in the government service answered ne.ir'.y all the j que.tio:vs correctly, but it was plain that he had learned what he knew about words by hearing rathT than by sight. His spelling was atrocious, but there was a horrible likeness between his misspelled words and the slipshod pronunciation of educated persons." Taking a slip of paper from his vest pocket he pointed to the applicant's spelling of the names of some states and cities, thus: "Mlchgan, Owio, Maysurl, Shecugo (the S being partly erased for a C). Buftlo. Clncinnatta. In Washington there was no "g," and the "d" was invariably absent from the word "and." For moral he wrote "m.rl." "You can see," said the amateur reformer, "that in nearly every instance the slipshod pronunciation of intelligent persons is reproduced phonetically In this spelling. This ma a spelled words as they are commonly mispronounced, and it is the iH'.st evidence in the world that reform is needed. Nearly everybody sounds 'a in Chicago as if it were an 'o,' and not even Murat Halstei calls the name Cincinnati correctly. The spelling reform that has been urged for so many years involves phonetic spelling, but if words are commonly mispronounced and if everybody is careless about it t te spelling reform could not go very far and could not be worth much. ot ow Dependent on Lecturer. "There are several reasons why the English language is undergoing some very undesirable changes. We are not no dependent on lectures and talks from cultivated men as they used to be in England, and pronunciation Is not assisted by reading. The reader sees no reason to pronounce the a' in 'match' and 'watch' differently. Pronunciation is not taught in the echools. and school teachers make as many blunders as other people. A good many people grow earelss because they fear if they pronounce some words correctly they may be accused of affectation and be classed with those who are so painfully precise as to appear finical- The accuracy of these persons in saying 'did you' is so extreme as to drive a man into saying 'didje' in very defiance. Sometimes, too. it is dangerous. Out in Nebraska they call the town of Beatrice 'Be-at-tress, with a strong accent on the second syllable. Th-i natives killed a young man from Boston who called it 'Ba-ah-tree-cha.' "Yet why should so many persons say spontanightlty instead of spontaneeity ? Why should nearly evrybody in the West say cal-li-ope (short i) for cal-li-o-pe( long i), and apparah-tus instead of apparaytus? Ease of expression is not in favor of the corruption in any of these instances. Of "ourse the most common error is in ignoring the true sound of u in such words as tune, which most of us call toon, and duty, which we call dooty, etc. A vast majority of us say noozepaper, Toozday, and the like. Perhaps we know that in most words of this class, except where 'u follows 'r,' there should be the sound of 'you,' but we pay no attention to It. It is strange, too, that sometimes a person who does not give 'u' its first sound in tune does give it In rule, where it should not be. "A man may be excused for calling charlotte russe 'Charley Boss and blanc mange 'blue mange,' for these are foreign words, but there is no excuse for saying ap-pricot for a-pricot, or ad-drees for ad-dress, or eck-quable for ec-quable, or Er-rin for E-rin, or asafidity for asafetlda, or Maderia for Maderia, or Ven-zu-ee-la for Ven-e-zu-el-a, or Adon-ls (short o) for Ado-nls (long o), or Dianna for Dia-na (long a), or day-po (accent on the first syllable), for day-po (accent on the last), or for dee-po, which Webster authorizes; or mat-tron or pattron, and so on. It may not be easy to put the accent on the last syllable In 'romance. but it is 'Just as easy to accent the last syllable as the first in 'pretense.' Some persons call bomb- 'boom' in stead of 'bum, because the spelling seems to warrant it, but when they call. tedious 'tejus' they have no such apparent warrant. In the West and South the 'i' in isolate is made long, and nearly everywhere educated persons say truck-u-lent for true-cu-lent, a-men-able for a-meen-able, lev-ver for lee-ver, and give the sound of 'u' in up instead of T in it in such words as squirrel, stirrup, and sirup. There are many words in which the accent is persistently misplaced by persons who know better. It is common to put the accent on the second syllable of peremptory instead of on the first, on the first instead of the second syllable of coquetry, on the second instead of the first syllable of exemplary, etc. Many persons place the accent on the first instead of the second syllable of inquiry ami do not give the T its proper length. The accent in gladiolus should be on the second syllable, with a long M.' but many place it on the third. They say hy-meen-e-al, with the accent on the 'nieen,' when It should be hy-mee-nee-al. with the accent on the 'nee.' AVliat lOxnaperntea One. "The exasperating thing about about It Is that some of these persons who are so careless about common words take the utmost pain3 to learn how to pronounce Bouguereau, and are convulsed when they hear anybody mis-pronounce Chopin and Beethoven. Recently they broke out with vawz for vase, though the weight of authority is against it. Knowles alone allows it. Webster authorizes only one pronunciation, the long 'a and hissing 's." Worcester prefers the 'z' sound, but not the 'aw.' The improper use of the sounds of a is most serious. Those who have the courage to use the Italian or the modified Italian 'a often use it unlawfully, as in cawn't and rawther. The proper sounds of 'o, particularly in God. d-g and some other words, are widely ignored. The common usage Is wrong in the case of the terminal Mne' in the names of chemicals, as morphine, chlorine, iodine, aniline, benzine, etc., all of which should be pronounced as though there were no final "e." It is morphin, not morpheea. The long T Is now commonly used in the termination 'itls.' Nearly everybody has ceased to siy 'bronchitis.' "Certainly there is no good reason for many of the forms of pronunciation now in authority, and they have been established by irrational usage; yet at some point the reckless disregard of all authority must stop. We have no more ri?ht to hold the dictionary in contempt in pro

nunciation than In plgnlflcatlon. In the case of words about whlh there U a weight of authority In favo? of a particular pronunciation we. the trustees of the English tongue, have no right to allow pure carelessness and Indolence to perpetuate atrocities. I "The carelessness of teachers has at- ' tracted the attention of Mr. Brokfieh1. an KnglNh physiologist. He dis-overs thit children have little sense of the meaning of many of the things they commit to memory, beciue tha sounds are slurred by the teachers. Two children, aged about el veil years, who did their reading anl arithmetic fairly, were asked to write down the answers of the church catechism to two Questions. Th? children

had been used to repeat the catechism during half an hour of each diy. In day school and Sunday-school, for four or live years. The first wrote thus: My duty toads Cod l. to bleM In him to fcrlng and to loaf wlthold your , arts wlthold mine sold and with ; my sernth to whirchp and to g;VJ thinks to put my old trast In him to mil upon him to onner his old n.ime and his world and to save him trulv all the i days of my life's end.' "Repeated rapidly this bears a ridiculous likeness to the sound of the real I answer. The answer of the second child . was equally absurd and meaningless and Just asjike In sound of the genuine answer." Vll.l,(ii: 1IKAITIH i HI, ACIC. fmltnte Neuro llntrela. lint Have Oillicully In Lettin the Paint Off, The little village of Clyde, one of the pr.-ttlest villages in Wayne county, has a great number of beautiful young women. Awhile ago somebody organized a show to be given for the benefit of some local church or charitable organization, and a lot of pretty girls, led by the female members of the choir of the church which was to be benefited, got together to discuss what part they would tak? in the entertainment. Somebody had been reading of a minstrel show given by young women in Brooklyn and suggested that Clyde follow Brooklyn. The Ide to ik. The girls decided that it would be perfectly lovely, and the details were arranged. To make the show realistic the girls thought they ought to blacken up. This was what the Brooklyn women did. There were some protests against going so far, but the blacking up Idea proved popular with a majority of the proposed performers, and it was adopted. The perform.' nee was given on night last week. The hall was crowded, and things went off nicely. There was singing, and the end men (who were men, by the way) worked off their gags, and the whole affair wound up with a song In concert. The Clyde orchestra was present and did won Krs with Us varied assortment of instruments, und the village folk decided unanimously that they had had their money's worth anil were perfectly satisfied. When tiie curtain went down the girls went back to wash the black oil th;-ir faces. Tiie first one ti reach a wasn basin to k aspongc and began rubbing her checks. To the intense horror of the entire company tha black would not budge. It was there to stay. The other girls seized pails, basins, anything that would hold water, got water and began to scrub. Th-1 black remained. They might just as well have been nebroes of the darkest hu; for all the Impression they made on the color. There were hysterics and all that kind of thing, but the bla.jk never budged. The girls scrubbed and cried and cried and scrubbed with the effect of getting off some small pitches of black and hightening their grotesque appearance. After hours of work they managed to whiten their cheeks enough to enable them to go out, and then they all skipied through back streets to their homes. Meanwhile the m?n were having a similar experience. They couldn't get the black off either. The end men and the principal comedian worked for an hour and thn strolled out to th? Clyde hotel with tiieir faces all shades from a light drab to a coal blick. The leading comedian got some of the blick off hi.s nose and chin, a little off hi.s cheeks, but had been able to make no impression on his ears, and he was a very spectacular young man when he walked into the billiard room of the hotel and huskily asked for something to drink. There was a theatrical man tn town, and late that night he was awakened by a heavy knock at his door. "Say," said an excited voice, "are you a theater man?' He said he was. "Well, I heard you were. What do you do to get burnt cork off when you black up for nigger minstrels?" "Wash it off." "Yes. I know, but how?" "Why, take a sponge. It ought to wash right off." There was a long silence. Finally the voice said again, "Say mister, how do you mix burnt cork when you use it )o black up for nigger minstrels?" "Mix it with water." "Great God!" said the voice; "we mixed ours with vaseline. In the course of a weejt or two it is expected that the young women who so successfully participated in the minstrel show will be around to received the congratulations of their friends. In the meantime the ears of the leading comedian are still of a beautiful, glossy black. Buffalo Express. Origin of (ilovm. If by glove is meant a covering or protection of some kind for the hands, it la not unlikely that the early races of men u?ed the article in some form; for we musk remember that the glove was in ancient days a shield or guard more than an ornament, and It may be that long before work in metals had a place in the world various articles for weir were fashioned out of leather, and good stout leather, as we know, can resist a good deal. We cannot, of course, say when gloves were first used, nor who invented them, but we do know that gloves as an article of dress, were worn by the Hebrews in the o'd testament period. They were worn also by the ancient Egyptians and the Greeks and RortfUns, and they were not unknown! to our own Saxon forefathers. There came a time when only persons in high stations were allowed to wear them. There was a period, also, when it was considered a mark of dictlnctlon to bury dignitaries with gloves on. Thus theiti is an account of the burial of one of the popes (Boniface VIII), in which it is staged that the hinds of the corpse were covered with gloves of white silk, beautifully worked with the needle, and ornamented with a rich border, studded with pearls. Gloves are very neatly fitted to the hand in our time. They were, somewhat baggy long ago, but two or three centuries back gloves were made of much greater value than any now to be found in our shops, in the case of persons of high estate, both men and women, no expense and no amount of time were grudged if thereby the gloves could be made handsome. It was the custom to embroider the guantlet part with rich threads and even to sew jewels into them, and some very pretty designs were at times worked out in this way. Very beautiful and dainty gloves of this kind were possessed by Mary Stuart, the queen of Scots, and her cousin, Elizabeth of England, had also finely worked guinileted gloves, but they were much larger than Mary's. The thumbs on Elizabeth's gloves were five inches long, and the palm measured three and one-half Inches across. No doubt this was larger than was needed, but there is no doubt also that Elizabeth had a hand for business more than for show, and it was a hand, therefore, to ba proud of. One of the prettiest of the gloves that have come down to us from that period was embroidered by M.try Stuart herself, and was her gift to Darnley. Knitted gloves are heard of as far back as the sixteenth century, and iron gloves, for use in battle, were worn at the time of the crusades. Leeds Mecury. A Way Out of the IJiniciiIty. Youne Saleswoman (In a Jananese ' store, anxious to suit her pronunciation to the tastes of her customers) "Did you say' you wished a vace, a vase or a vate?" Young business man (too much In a UU. I J ll'l line Ullltll lH'uo - .in., i you. I'll take a jar." Brooklyn Eagle.

SKAItt'II LIGHT AM) TOIIPI'IMIM.

Modern Invention to Aid nnl Wnrfarp Itent Color for arhip. In the series of trials of the big hnckert jlectrl- liht at Sandy Hovk. perhaps no experiment has teen more striking or suggestive than thit wni-h sought to determine whether a torpedo bat could maneuver undetetd In the bay within the radius of its rays. The trial has been looked f -rw ird 1 1 with the more interest Fince in uml '..ir experiments at the Newport tori-ilo statist the b at had repeated. y baffled the lights mounted there, in or.e c ithe Cushlng ami Stiletto stoie into the harb.tr together undetected, although the station masters had been warned to look out for "m betw-m 9 and .:'! o'c'.jck that night. A few minutes after 9 the.entered the range of th- se.nch lighr. made for Conanlcut IslanJ. moved alon? the shore to Kose Islan i. and there crossed the hartx-r to their anchorage, while the light was still sweeping the entrance of the by. In thu case they hoi been for ten minutes in the open channel, admirable maneuvering and the color of their paint helping them to escape detection. About tix weeks bu?r. In the snnv. harbor, the dishing made a feigned attack upon the Atlan'a In ihe presenc of umpires appointed to determine whether it was successful or not. 'i after the time set the cruiser tlrd a gin, denoting her claim to nave Hoovered the Cushlng beyond torpi r.tng. h r search lights being dlre'ied upon a detain spot. Thereupon the torpedo boat, which had not even l.ft the Inner harbor, darted out frDm a differ it direction anl reached, it is said, within 1W ard? ( the Atlanta, or very short torpedo range, before discovery, he could have bi i.va up the cruiser. It was hoped, however, that, with th" extraordinary search light at jndy Hook, the fortunes of the contest would change, and the boat would be defeated. This seemed especially probable from the fine results of the two previous trials of the power of light. But further to insure success, a dispersing lens was fitted to the lisrht so as to cover a spacious section of. a circle instead of contracting the light in a single ray. When all was ready and the boat had been picked out by the light the latter kept it under surveillance for a considerable time, but at length was oblig.d to signal that it was lost. Thereupon an answer, signaled by a lantern on the boat, which by the way, was only a naptha launch with an army officer aboard, told the searchers to look for it at a certain hour inside. At the time fixed the search light swept over the bay, but could not find the little craft until once more, after a signal of acknowledged failure, the boat's lantern made known Its whereabouts. Then the i-U'i h ran seaward, and again entered undetected. It should be said that a heavy fog rolled in b. fore the time limit In the latter test had expired. Still, the general result was considered to be the defeat of the light. It is to be understood, then, that search lights are a failure, and that the hopes entertained of their ability to pick up torpedo craft must be wholly abandoned? That does not follow. As f ir as the Sandy Hook light is concerned, it is thought that it was a mistake to use the dispersing lens, and that the other would have been more successful. Hence, in the next test, concentrated rays will be tried, and important results rrm be obtained as to the best way of using these lights. But. for the moment, one of the most interesting lessons of the experiment at Newport and Sandy Hook is as to the proper color of toriedo boats and other harbor defenders. When, some years ago. an order directed that our new steel vessels should be painted white above the water line, with the yards, funnel?, ventilators and s on a straw yellow, the change greatly pleased the public. The ouest'on of looks, however, had not been, the only one involved, as white made the vessels much cooler, and hence healthier In tropical regions. But soon objections were made to the new raiment, namely, that it was difficult to keep clean, and also that it was too conspicuous at night, and, therefoie, not adapted to war service. At all events it seemed clear that torpedo boats ought not to be white, and accordingly experiments were mad? with other colors on the Cushing. Then came the Newport experiments already spoken of, followed by those at Sandy Hook. Samples of the paints used In foreign countries for rendering torpedo boats as nearly invisible as possible under search lights were collected, with formula for mixing color for that purpose. The dishing was then painted like the torpeda boats of the Argentine Republic, and was directed, in returning to Newport harbor from service elsewhere, to come back, when practicable, at night and endeavor to escape the notice of the station search lights. As the colors used, one much praised is that of the French coast guard ship?, namely, a lead color, wdth a slight tinge of green. That was employed also on the Chilian torpedo boats Lynch and Condell, which surprised and destroyed the armor-clad Blanco Encolada, and on two occasions, at Iqulque and Coqulmbo, entered these ports at night, and were barely visible a few hundred feet away. The Cushing was at one time painted about that color, though, perhaps, a little darker. The dull lead color of the Jean Bart will be remembered, and not unlike it was that which some blockade runners used during the civil war. Still another color commended for torpedo boats is a peculiar tint of brown. Germany, however, has, after many experiment's, finally fixed upon bluLh gray as least distinguishable under electric light, and has directed that all its coast defenders and torpedo boats shall be painted that color. This choice is the more worthy of consideration since yellowish brown had previously been in favor in Germany. Coming again to our experiments, the Stiletto, when she tricked the searchlight at Newport, was dark green, and the Cushlng's color had been purposely deepened till it was nearly a black. In the experiments at Sandy Hook the launch was not repainted, but when she signaled to the search light to lind her inside, her commander put tarpaulins painted a dark green over the sides of the craft. What the final solution of color will be for our own torpedo boats remains to be seen, although dark green has thus far gained some noteworthy victories. The facts here given will showhow much Importance is attached to the subject by other countries, and, with the early increase expected in our own torpedo fleet, it will also doubtless attract much attention here. N. Y. Sun. lllne Print Calendar. Pressed flowers are placed on the eleu" srlass of a printing: frame, s-uch as used by amateur photographers, writes Lennie Greenlee in an article on "Pressed Flower Souvenirs" In the August Ladies' Home Journal. The calendar is plainly marked on tissue paper and also placed on the glass, the airangement being just that which is desired on the finished page. A ferro-prusslate or blueprint paper is then placed over the arranged material and exposed to direct sunlight. The paper is next washed in dear water, and the pretty blue and white picture Is finished. The paper f r them may b? obtained from any pho- j toprapher, who will also do the printing j If desired. The prround color of the cal- ; endar leaves will be rich blue, with lie picture of the flower in white and the calendar month in pale blue. All the variety one wishes may be secured by placing the calendars in different positions upon the leaves, and by different arrangements of the flowers. The cost is trifling and the result charming. Either of these calendars may be made larger, of course. Where heavy sheets of Bristol-board, a foot or two feet square are used, the panels may be made very handsome and striking. For these all the flowers need not be pressed, and a greater variety may be secured. Aot Lontc In Town. Young Wife (at telephone) "Is tlm the office of the telephone company? I want to talk to Cyrus Winterbotton, j I'm his wife, and " Telephone Girl "Number?" Young: Wife "Number? I'm his flrt and only, you insulting creature!" Chicago Tribune.

m mm

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