Indiana State Sentinel, Volume 34, Number 28, Indianapolis, Marion County, 15 August 1888 — Page 3

THE INDIANA STATE SENTINEL, "WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 15, 1888.

EYERY-DAY LIFE TOPICS.

TALMAGE'S LETTER TO HIS FR1END3. The Comedj of Error, Otherwise Called an Elopement, Often Found to be a Sorry Prnm.t Other Matter. THE Eev. T. DeWitt Talma-e, D. D., who is now enjoying a vacation, of course intermits Lis usual Tri Jaynight talk to Lis church and congregation. Instead thereof the eloquent divine sends as a eubstituto for it the following letter: There has been an unusual number of elopements within a few days. Editors, clergymen, artists, and men and women of all occupations and social positions have taten part in tho comedy, which is about sure to pass into tragedy. It i3 called the romance of marriage. It has been epidemic in all the cities. iSome Jiave cried and some have laughed, and many Lave philosophized. Some pay parents are to blame for too jrreat rigidity ia the control of the destiny of their daughters. No doubt there are Buch cases in the attempt to transplant European espionage to America. Tarental despotism, like all other styles of despotism, is unbearable ; but American society is not much over-burdened with such caro. In most caes tho danger is in the opposite direction and in too littlo watchfulness on the part of parents whom God has appointed to be the guardians of the Lousohold. Let parents win bo much of the child's confidence that they sball be taken into all counsels pertaining to the affairs of the heart- When the young people of a household come to understand that father and mother are their most sympathetic advisers the chapter of domestic calamity will end. But whoever may be to blame, in almost all cases there are just four people who will have to puffer for tho precipitAte matrimonial relations the parents and the runaways. The romance soon vanishes, and the twain find out that if they had, some evening in early acquaintanceship, on the way home from a place of amusement, been, by a drunken backman, driven off the dock" into the lake or river and the policeman had not been able to f.sh them out, their fate would have been less deplorable. The glamour of elopement gone, refinement is found tied for life to vulgarity, education chained fast to ignorance, and soft Lands of luxuriance have to come to the washtub. More appropriate would it have been if tbe minister olficiating Lad lost his place in the litany, and read the service for burial of the "dead rather than the wedding ceremony for the living. Most cf your sympathies go out toward the parents, ör the daughter who steps from mansion to hovel. The most of my sympathies are for the poor fellow of J71X) income with a millionaire fool tied fast to liim, one who shall forever keep Lira informed as to how much better she had it before she left Lome. Many of my sympathies are with Lim, for he thought he was making a grand affiancing, and all his life will be a disappointment and a bitterness untold. During the honeymoon he may be exhilarant, but before six months Lave passed Le will wish Le Lad never been born. There Lave been justifiable cases of wedded life contrary to parental decree, and yet subsequent hapiness; but ninety-nine Ciises out of the undred that you sec reported have been unmitigated disasters, and will rind a terminus either in the divorce court or the almshouse, or a pauper's cabin. Paul, standing in a state of celibacy, yet closely observant of the family re lations, warns people against being unequally yoked together; yet what devastation has been wrought by the romance of the connubial state. Marriage is an old-fashioned business, and that wedding procession marches the best which starts not down a ladder from the back window, but from the front door with a better benediction than any clergyman in canonicals can ever pronounce namely, a mother's blessIn pr. But what a thing to be grateful for that the vast majority of homos are divinely constructed ! The exceptions only makw the rule more observable. The stranger passes along our streets and Le sees the front steps, the doorwavs, the windows of a thousand Louses, and they 6eem very much alike. Brick is brick, and iron is iron, and stone is stone; but the wall between those houses is the boundary of an empire. God Las fenced it in from all the world. It is a realm by itself. It is the most sacred -Pt on eartb to us. There our children were bom; there our loved ones died. Festivities and lamentations, reunions and partings. Lave dedicated the place. Father and mother, son and daughter, call it home. Nothing will so soon kindle a man into a conflagration of wrath, or hurl him into such a thunderbolt of indignation as tbe invasion of Lis Lome. AVLcn his work is done Le expects to die there. The last time he ever sees the world he will see it from that window. Now in these places are concentrated more of happines3 than can be found in any other place on earth. God has kindly apportioned us into these families, and let us be grateful for this gracious grouping. It could not have merely happened so. It was divinely ordered that it tshould be so. God setteth'thc solitary in families. Upon all your homes may the blessing come. Upon the dining-room, and may there be bread enough to spare. Upon the nursery and may sickness 6tand back, and the angel wLich redeemeth U3 from all evil bles3 the lads. Upon your pillow, and you be guarded by him who never slumberet h and sleepeth. Upon your parlor, that it may be the scene of healthful reunion and neighborhood civilities. Upon our library, that the destroying angel of iniquitous literature may never touch its wing to shelf or table. And may there bo somewhere a upot of prayer, a family altar, where all shall kneel and all shall fret the divine blesain?, and then, when a ew more seasons have come and gone and that home is broken up, as it must be by tbe passage of years, may our sons and daughters in other homes live happy and

for? ivt',l

useful lives, and we who are now in the tho generation at tLe front have passed into a better home, a home with God, tho house not made with hands eternal in the heavens. Yet we snail leave tbe pate open as we go through, and after awhile the rest of our circle, I Lope.will comeand join us in the land where nothing can disrupt or destroy. But the overshadowing circumstances of the last few days is the revival of the old question of strikes. Aro we never to have this war between capital and labor settled? Yes, but not by stitfheckedness on the part of either of them, but through kindly arbitration. To every intelligent person, whether capitalist or laborer, this state of things is deplorable. One great sadness is in tho fact that the thrifty workman who has a little money in the savings bank, or out on bond or mortgage, very soon takes it out, or takes it up to meet present exigencies. There must be bread on the tahle, the children must have shoes, there must bo more than the usual appearance of thrift, lest thero bo a prospect of giving in and a necessity of ending the strike. Astrike always means eullering. Tho blow comes hard both upon capital and labor, but heaviest upon labor. In all the labor strikes since the world stood the workman 'gets the worst of it. Capitalists have money abad and ifthev never made another dollar in their lives, they would live on past surplus; but the vast majority of toilers, though they may have laid up something for a rainy day, must not nave the rainy day too prolonged. Another sadness is in the fact that political demagogues tako advantage of such things and foment the disturbance and block up the way of adjustment. There are those ready to frustrate all amicable arrangement. The troublo is that all classes of men have among them those who want to be bosses. The most of the capitalists do not think for themselves; the most of thelaborersdo not think for themselves. There are bos c pitalists and boa laborers who want their way. Indeed the human family is divided into two classes, those who boss and thoso who get bossed. As soon as a man rises to power in trade, in literature, in merchandise, in religion, be gets bossy. I warrant you I could pick out ten representative capitalists and ten representative workmen who, in oneafternoon's session, would settle this industrial grief, save millions of dollars and suüering indescribable and illimitable. I cry out iu behalf of the imperiled financial interests of this whole country for arbitration. Capital will never heln itself by righting lalor, and labor will never get any advantage from combating capital. They go up together or go down together. Show me any year in the history of the country when capital was prosperous and I will show you a year when labor was prosperous, and vice versa. Let either interest be struck between the eyes and all interests of the land stagger and reel and fall. But there is no doubt that in all parts of the l ud capitalists are imposing upon labor. They own tho New York legislature and the Pennsylvania legislature, with a few notable exceptions; they own congress for the most part; they "ride over the necks of the people. Wo have over five thousand millionaires in this country. It is a bad sign of the time when one man dies worth forty millions and another worth eighty millions, and our richest men aro not dead yet. It wanta no very great wisdom to see that there are people in this land who Lave more than their 6hare. I do not wonder that sometimes men lose their equilibrium and strike, although it is unwise to strike, 6ince a strike means less bread, less fuel, less good clothes, and less homes. But there are capitalists who have no trouble with their employes. The sales being less the employer rings the bell that calls his workmen together and savs: ul get so much less for this iron, for this steel, for these carpets, for these woolens, for these nails, for screws, for these books, and hence your work is worth to me so much less." S'tieh employers havo no strikes in their mills, in their factories, in their harvest fields, in their printing establishments. The toilers realize that they are not trod upon, nor considered as having no more feeling than the iron with which they stir tho blaze, or tho type they set, or the spindles they turn. Now, what we want is a few men with equipoise enough, and sympathies enough, and pluck enough, and promptness enough to go among these contestants and harmonize counting-room, desk and anvil, and get tho delicate hand of calculation to cross palms with tLe brown and Lardknueklf'd Land of toil. May the table of the counting-room be run over with primrose, and all the hammers of toil blossom and bloom I I suppose many of our trade-unions are wielding a despotism, and that workmen are driven, and stopped, and imposed upon as much by people of their own craft as by tho capitalists. If a man has a mind to stop work let Lim stop, but he has no right to atop me. If a man prefers to to go to the poor-house lot Liiu go, but he has no right to compel me to go along with him. I would have this country so free that, when a man wauts to quit work he can quit work, and when he wants to go ahead no trades-union shall hold him back. Free hammer! Free travel! Free yardstick! Free spindle! Free furnace! Free dockyard! Free men! I expect before labor gets its rights fully established in this country it will havo to drive back tho encroachments of capital on the one hand and the outrageous despotism of trades-union on tho other. PROBLEMS OF WEALTH.

The Relation of Christianity to the ImBifDi Fortunes Accumulating;. Proridenco Journal. In all the more Christian countries a more or less rapid increase of wealth has been going on during the last hundred years, and at accelerated rate during the last generation. Wealth in tho United fcftate.s increased during twenty years from lSwHrora fourteen billions to forty-four billions. In England something like the same marvelous increase begun with the year 1SJ, and these two countries are now the wealthiest in tho world. It is probable, tbat their wealth is to increase at an enormous rate for many years to come. Serious social questions are arising out of the rapid increase of wealth, to which an answer mut sooner or later be found. It would be incorrect to say that Christianity Las a ready-made answer to these problems; it would be equally inexact to say that it is silent concerning them. Christianity does not forbid the use of wealth. Although its Founder had not where to lav His head, and some men must follow Ilim in this respect in order to attain higher ends than personal ad vancement or increase of forturne, the majority of men are left free to engage in the struggles for wealth, power and Tame in which other men engage. Christianity suggests uses of wealth which may contribute immensely to the welfare of mankind. It has its long list of charities, philanthropic missionary activities ana educational institutions which are dependent for their success upon the financial property of its adherents. Under its teachings a conscientious use of money can be observed to a very hopeful degree, and these institutions which are dependent upon wealth are generously maintained. It is now easier to obtain money to carry on religious work than to find the men who are fitted to direct it. The distribution of wealth Christianity treats in the same broad way with which it deals with tho struggle for possession. It sanctions neither communism nor socialism, directly decides no question

between rich and poor, between employer and employed. By its efforts for the diffusion of intelligence and morality among the lower classes, and by the restriction that it is always exerting upon the injustice of the Strong it is doing an unrecognized but powerful part in bringing about social conditions in which all shall have fair play and every man his due allowance of the wealth that uaturo has made possible for man. The problems of wealth may therefore be said to be working themselves out if not so rapidly as social agitators would wish, yet in accord with tho teachings of tho Christian religion, and as fast as other developments in humau history have gone on. fcuuday Amotruirnti and Work. Christian AdToeato rueth. In all our largo cities much labor, in no sense necessaryt is done on Sunday. Shops are open, in some cases factories at work, buildings are being erected, streets repaired, and mechanics who take work to their homes constantly employed. Sunday amusements aro foes to workiugmen; to home-life, which they tend to break up; to getting a competence, by tho temptation which they furnish to extravagance to the increase of knowledge, by breaking up the habit of reading on the Lord's day; to temperance, by the opportunities they create for drinking; to religion, by using the day which God 6et apart for His worship, and to refinement and social improvement, by withdrawing the workman and Iiis family lroin the elevating society of Christian congregations, in which they become acquainted with and inlluenced by thoso more fortunately situated than themselves. Between the so-called blue laws and'the true Christian use of the Sabbath there is much difference. To advocate the latter it is not necessary to advocate tho former. The Commune or Christ. flishop of Minuesota ia Westminster Abbey. 'a wonder why men pass by the church to found clubs and brotherhoods and orders. They will have them and they ought to have them until tho church is in its divine love what its founder destined it to be the brotherhood in Christ of the children of our God and Father. What the world needs to-day is not alms, not hospitals, not homes of mercy alone. It needs the spirit and the power of the love of Christ. It needs the voice, the ear, the hand and the heart of Christ seen in and working in his children. No powere of government, no prestige of social position, no prerogatives of church authority can meet the issues of this hour. Wc have waited already too long. Brotherhood men will Lave, and it will be the brotherhood of the commune or the brotherhood in Christ as the children of our God and Father. Infidelity answers no questions, heals no wounds, fulfills no hones. The gospel will do, is doing to-day what it has done through all tho ages, leading men out of sin and darkness and despair to the liberty of sons of God. A Few Facts About the llible. Verses in the old testament, 21,311. Verses in the new testament, 7,9f). The looks of the old testament, 3V. The books of the new testament, 27. "Words in the old testament, 59:,4:J0. Letters in the new testament, S:),S20. "Words in the new testament, 1.31,253. Chapters in the old testament, 62P. letters in the old testament, 2,725,100. Chapters in the new testament, 2'JO. The word ' Jehovah" occurs ti.SSÖ times. The mid lie bok of the old testament is Proverbs. Tho middle chapter of the old testament is John xxix. The middle verse of the new testament is Acts xxii, 17. The shortest verse in tho new testament is John xi, 35. TLe longest verse in the old testamejit is Fsther viii, 9. The middle book of the new testament is II Thessalonians. The middle chapter and shortest in the bible is Bsalm cxvii. Religions Note and Opinion. A Catholio lady in New York has just given $50, 0(A) to the American catholic university. The Amerienn liible society reports the receipt of $42.fi7y.4-i during June, ami the issuing of 73,434 copies. Sinee April 1, 2,642 copies have been issued. Mr. Moojy owes much of his success to his robust body. The day is past when the jesthetio invalid derives any advantage from his debility. Christian Advocate. The methodist episcopal church, during the

past twenty-three years, has piven $3,003,000 to church extension and aided over 6,000 churches, not b,(X"J,000, as was stated last week. Au vancelical tract society has been found ed in Brazil to provide a Christian literature for the 3,000 Protestant church members of the empire and their families, as well as for any others who can be reached by it. Religious papers are agaia reminding catholies wnen ffoiug mio me country sua to me sea shore on vacations to find out also if a catholio church is near or some place temporal ily arranged for the celebration of mass on Sunday. The catholic church in Tivoli, N. Y.. has a generous benefactor in the person of Airs. Livinzston Redmond. The lady has erected a school building at her own expense for the education of tho catholio children ot that vi cinity. Twenty years ago there was not a priest of any sort or a religious order or any sisterhood in Wyoming, where now there is a bishop, ten priests, two male and two female religious orders and a catholic population of about 10,000. In November. 1S77. in the suburbs of Algiers. was ODened the first presbvterian church in Northwestern Africa. .The beautiful edifice of fre ?tone and marble is the eit't of Sir Peter Coats to the synod ox the united presbytenaa church of fc-eouand. Bolivia, which has an area of 500,000 square miles and a population of L000,0ö0, is without a ningle Protestaut missionary. Two American teachers, encouraged by liolivion gentlemen and recommended by the presbyterian board of missions, expect soon to establish a school in La 1 az, the capital. Missionary nona. Let all who have the freedom of our public schools at heart keep cool. Talk is cheap, and hot-headed resolutions are easy to pass, but do not carry much weight. Let everything be done dispassionately and in a kindly temper, for religious diileronces are the saddest and most injurious of all. The Congregational ist. More copies of the word of God. in whole or in wart were put into circulation by the British and Foreign bible society during the last year than existed in the whole world at the beginning of the present century. Adding the cir culation of our llible societies, the number would be vastly greater. Missionary Jieraia. Olivet College attest the interest of the people of Michigan by the $100,000 given it during the past year. This, with the $20,000 received from the estate ot Lait, iiradley or Massachusetts, to be put into a library building, will set forward this noble Christian college a eood way toward the equipment which its portion requires. im Admnct. Url Hair. Gentleman's Magazine. How are we to account for the popular pre judice against red haii? Is it connected with the tradition that Judas Ivariot was redhaired, or is it of earlier origin? So strong was the sentiment against it in the middle ages that one of the chroniclers denounces it as "a burning brand of infidelity." It may very well be that the hatred with which William P.ufus was regarded owed an extra dash of intensity to the color of his tawney locks. Not a few famous personages, however, have been endowed by nature with this fatal hue (which their flatterers, no doubt. nersUted in describing as auburn), for instance, Anne Boleyn (Mr. i roude speaks of "her fair hair flow iaz looe over her shoulders"); Queen Lliabetb (Sir Itichard Baker describes hers as "in clining to pale yellow;" Fuller uses the con venieut epithet "fair); Columbus, the poet Camocns, and Marsbai Ney. One does not like to think of red-haired poets; but the reader will find that auburn, which has at least a warm tinge on it, has not been uncom mon among the brotherhood or the tuneful lyre." Shakespeare's hair and beard were auburn, If we may credit the original coloring of bis bust in Stratford's rhu reo, and Milton's "hyacinthiue locks" were of a similar color. Tint Rnrn'a hnir m-ns l.lark. and Itrron'a nf & I dark brown. "

nOW OLD JACK CURED HIM

HE WANTED TO BE A CIRCUS RIDER. Fractlslne Itare-Back Itldtng In th ItarnAmong; the Little Folks Some Knotty Problems for Solution Ktc. IT was Saturday afternoon, and all the boys had congregated, as was their custom, in Mr. Lindell's barn. They were Ktretched in ever' attitudo on the hay, and Tommy Dunn was lying in a very dangerous and therefore very delightful position on one of the big beams. "What are you going to do when you petto boa man," inquired Tommy, as he gazed at the family of swallows that had mado their nobt in the ridge of tho old barn. "I suppose I'll helD father run the place," replied Jhnmy, soberly. "I'm goingto keep store," announced Eb Farpons, who was in the habit of making the most advantageous 'swaps" of any boy in school. Many of the boys had no clear idea of what they were going to do; but all were surprised" when Tommy announced, boldly, "I'm going to be a circus rider." Several had longings to become lawyers or physicians, but none had hoped to become one of those gorgeous gentlemen in pink tights and spangled trunks who had appeared in tho circus that was in town the week before. "Iiut father says that a circus actor has to begin to practice when he is a boy," objected Jimmy. "Of course," agreed Tom. "I practice every dav." "On what?" asked Jimmy, with a ely smilo; for he knew well that Mr. Dunn would never allow Tom to drive his team, much less practice circus on their backs. "Well, 1 haven't tried a horse, eo far," Tom admitted; "but," ho added, regaining his composure, "I swing on a trapeze and jump over a box almost every day." "Guess you'd find a difference if you tried a real horse," remarked Eb Parsons. ".Sav, Jimmy, couldn't you get one of your father's colts to let mo have a try bn ?" asked Tom. "I don't know; I'll ask: him," said Jimmy. He went to look for his father and found him directing some men who were building a wall. "Father, can we have the colts to ride a littl.-while?" "The colts !" answered his father ; "why, mv bov, they are not half broken yet. Ta'ke old Jack." "J3ut old Jack looks so bad," objected Jimmy. "Handsome is that handsome does, Jimmy ; and old Jack will do better by you than the colts would." Jimmy went back to the barn, not at all satisfied. "Father says wo can have old Jack." "Old Jack!" exclaimed Tommy; "a pretty circus horse he would make I" "He looks more like a horse than j-our dry goods box that you have been practicing on." "Well, I suppose if wo can't have what we want, we've sot to tako what we can get," muttered Tom. Accordingly the horse was led out. "He'd make a good subject for a horse doctor," commented Joe Fisher. "You ought to put him on a package of horse liniment and label him 'Before using.' " Meanwhile the boys were busily engaced in clearing the barn floor aad patting up a rope to make the ring. At' last it was finished, Tom dropped from his perch on the beam on to the horse's back, and losing his hold slid down on the floor. "He's pot a slippery back anyhow," Tom remarked, as he climbed on a manger in order to mount again. Jack stood perfectly still, surprised, no doubt, by thetm tstrange proceedings, but evidently having a clear idea that his first business was not to hurt the boys. "itand on his back," urged ono. "Stand on your head, the way the circus man did." The latter seemed to be the most diffi cult, and consequently the most attractive to Tom's disposition. He scrambled up, and after several unsuccessful efforts, finally succeeded in balancing himself on his hands. Tho boys were in a fever of excitement. "Start the horse," urged two or three, and before Tom could let himself down, Jack had taken a step forward iu obedience to some one's order to "G'lang " It wa3 only one fct,ep, but that was enough to make Tom lose bis balance, and fall heavily to tho floor. Jack 6tood perfectly still, and had allowed the bovs to drag Tom, who was stunned by the fall, from between bis feet. Fortunately Tom was not seriously inlureu, but it cured him of all desire to be a circus rider. When he told his father about the accident, ho finished the story with; "And if old Jack hadn't had more sense than all of us bovs put together, I'd have been killed. 'Handsome is as handsome does,' Mr. Lindell says, and old Jack must bo a beauty, for he certainly acted hand somely by me." Amonc the Little Folks. Studying from Nature Tommy "Mamma, me and Maude have been playing doctor. I just give her some medicine in a tpoon and she lies down and dies. Lije. A youne lady in this city who teaches a Sunday-school class of eight-year-olds recently asked them the question, 44 V hat is an altar' ' 4'I kuow," said one irrepressible; "It's a place where they burn insects." Awjusta ( Me.) Jour nal. A little boy, one of a largo tamily. was dining out one day and the hostess inouire! : "Do you you like chicken, Willie?" "I don't know, ma'am. 1 never tasted anything but the drum stick," was the demure answer. Ditroit Fre I'ctss. "From what mount were the laws given to the people?" asked a teacher in the Mount I'leasaut öunday-bchool last Sunday. "Mount Vernon," sung out a little girl before anyone else had a chance to answer, and the answer counted. Waxhm'jton dritte Minister (who has been discussing woman's riehts with Mrs. Hendricks, to Hossie) Well, Flossie, will you want to vote when you grow up to be a woman?" Flossie (four years old) N-no, sir, I thmlc not: I shall have all I can do to look after my children." New York Sun. A Sunday-school lesson was on the "The Ten Vinrins." and the text Sunday the review Ques tion was a.-ked, "Wh it was the lesson about last Sunday?" A bright boy gave the prompt answer, about ten gaia tnai went to a weddin. American Missionary. - Mamma "What's the matter, precious? Mabel, you naughty child, what have you been doing to your poor little sister?" Mabel (virtuously and denantly) "Nothing." Mamma "lou have! 1 know you have! Mabel . only told her f-he'a got to die some day, and she says she wouV Jfarper't Maganne. Some carpenters were putting a fence around the yard where ntue n. lived, rught coming on before they finished, they roughly nailed some long strips of timber across the posts to . I 1 1 t LI . . 1 protect me inruni. .u. loosing at u saia: ''That fence is just basted! And, my! what long stiches, mammal" Christian Jlegister. Toto has been expressly forbidden to tonch anything upon pnpa's library desk and has had the lessonjiftiniully enforced upon several oc casions. 1 he other night a discussion arose as to the origin of a certain word. The dictionary was found on papa's desk, but the word was not in it. "It's very strange," says papa. "That word is certainly missing, and yet it ought to be there." Toto, with tearful earnestness: "1 can't help ft papa I really didn't take it" f rum utc enot. 'The hardest question I ever had to answer," said a gentleman who had just come down from the Thousand islands, "waa put by my little

boy while the train was parsing through a sms strip of woods. 'Papa,' he snouted, the roa

all roaring oi tne train making it uimcuit to near, are there any lions an' tigers an' bears in these woods? 'No ' I said. 'Well, if there ain't no lious an' tigers an' bears ia woods,' he shrieked above the din. 'what do thev have woods for?" Utica Observer. One f the many teachers now in the city told the following: "The mother of one of my pupils had died and I made tho event the occasion for a serious talk to the children, reminding them : t their own happy homs, impressing upon them their duties, etc The little ones were pretty wUt and thoughtful, when up went a hand on the back scat, A little fellow sitting there, whose father had a third wife, evidently wished to impart some information to me. 'Well, Johnny, what is it? 1 asked. Tltase, nia-a-m, I've had two mothers, and I'm goin on the third.' "Stn Francisco Call. Little Freddie is another of the small bovs whose acutcncs of reasoning powers marks them ns destined for the lawyer's trade. He had lately acquired a bad habit of pinching; and one day his mother, after a child li ad been brought to her screaming with the pain of one of Fieddie's pinching exploit, culled her son to her and gave hiui an object lesson by pinching him sharply iu the arm. 'There," auid khc, "now you know how it feels." ' "Oh, no," said Freddie very positively in the midst jf his bluhberlug, "when I pinch you it don't hurt wc."b'oton Transcript. A Boston Rchool teacher who has made notes of some of the queer say ings of her pupils gives os bamples the following: Aked to describe the character of Alexander the Great, one said: "He was proud, of medium height, with small eyes and head iuclincd a little to one side. I think, Miss Dlank.it was the left Bide." Ia giving an account of a battle another said: "The soilders fouirht with such bravery that after they were killed they crawled aloug the ground and slabhed at the legs of the enemy." Here are three more: "Henry VIII. of England married his brother's deceased wife." "In the first century Pompeii and Herculaneum were covered with n eruption." "Then there was a resurrection of 1'ompe.y's sons in Spain." KNOTTY PROBLEMS. Our readers are Incited to furnish original enirmns, cliars'lf!, riddles, rebuses, aivl other "Knotty l'robleius," addre&Mng all com mimical ions relative to this department to fill. Chadbourn. Lewiston, Jie.l No. 2,454. The Modern Artel. From the Twenty Knnttr Problems Awarded f 10. I rorco like Mab, tho fairy qnoen, i trink aud gambol a!l uuetn; From airy regions take a titRht To frighten folk by pale moon light 1 h ) mngio art though Jlorrman boull I rival him at raising ghosts. 'Montr mortals wie au 1 nplsh tl The first I've aluays ben myself. My surfs aro countless as the es, Tlia czar hai not o many slaves. I flatter tlirt in fx-hiou ilrcwdj The dti'le itü matchless charms invest; l 'eu over men who think them wise A srcvfi't, i,'-iit!y tj raiiDize. 1 help to i-well the mlor's pelf Alihouh I f.orn tho dresa uiTselL I toiioh the- poet with my wanl ; Inspire th? painter's mter band. Thou fth tiling appear In prony print Tti.-tt ne'er were tiuuMed in my lulat, "Within the third lew writers rank I B sometimes draw upon my bank, ror ou my followers foolish elil 1 shower iny wealth though poor myself. Mount r.0TAL. No. 2,4r3 An Ancient Epitaph. From the tweuty knotty problems awarded 5. II E K L II K M O G O T A L U L E P T A L T A N D L 11 C O I) On an old miser's toombstons this inscription s found. The learned men were summoned and soon gathered rouud ; Whst language it was they could not all apree, But if you are a linguist no doubt you will see. J. V'. IIarkmlss. No. 2,456 A Family Froblem. From the Twenty Knotty Problems Awarded $100. Four Indies wlio.se tir?t names were Maud, Lucy, Lli.a!eth and Mary, purchased goods in a dry goods store to the amount ol $-"2.4 L. hlizabeth's purchase was one-fourth of tho total amount; aud it was as much as tbe amount purchased by her daughter and her sister's daughter. Maud's purchase amounted to 17 lents; and Lucy's mother's purchase, amounted to ten limes as much as tbe sum of the purcha.se of the other three ladie. "What relationship did the four ladies bear to one another. J. II. Feza-eje. No. 2,457 Decapitation. I am a book of hymns and prayers, Or else small particles of earth, Shorn of my bead a wild bird bears The name that then has birth. This bird, bereft of head, you'll find Hait pain and trouble great ; Behead again, if you've a mind. legation is my state. Blaxchk. No. 2,458. Anagram. I wm once in an editor's sanet.iiu (Most drejdiul of lion's dens), And I saw in the editor's basket Manuscript piled up by tbe tens; And the upper ones.Just added, were labeled on this wie t "iV.W." by C," entitled "Jy JIM Pw-s." And 1 mused within iujbcIi, is it not the name that takes? And miebt E. C not hare published had hs called his work "Hot Cakes?" Aicsa Tempter. No. 2,459 A Primer Lesson. From the twenty knotty problems awarded 520. Fill the blanks with dinerent forms of the same word as desiuuU d by numbers. What do you (1) l(i) only t(2; now, but an hour ago I (2) a tramp. Do you think the tramp (2) the (2)? I do not know. Perhai the tramp (2) the (2) , but 1 do not think he was ever (A) to (2) with the (2)-. Kow tell what you would rather do than (2) with the (-'). 1 wonll rather (1) you (2) with the (2); or play (1-2) Willi little brother Tom; or hear my big siater Sue &ay htr le&aoa about 11), (2), (jfy E. V. lLiaR'S. No. 2.4CO. A Qneer.Fellow. I'm a curious looking fellow. Cap of biack, and mask of yellow; ltat ber slender, rather tall, father light weight with It all. 'Tis plain 1 was intended Tr, Ifal ia miint lit. For my days are quickly ended If I'm involved in strife. can net Ix-ar resistancelose mv u. ad hi once: I grow so Lo and violent, J keen) a rety duuee. And such undue excitement IUmuIis as you'd expect Fnds mv caieer Instanter, My constitution wrecked. Uriau. A New Fri.e Competition. With the lcmrtheninjf of the evenings some prize competitions of an entirely novel character may be t'Xpecu-d, and will doubtless be welcomed. As an immediate encourajement to the ingenuity of readers the season is opened with a puzzlo-niaklujr contest, in which a 1 are Invited to engage. The prizes are seven in number, and they will be awarded by the ediiorof "Knotty I'robloms" for the best seven lots of three puzzle each. This is the list: 1. A cash irie of ten dollars. Ü. A cash prize of five dollars. 3. 1 ire cau prizes of two dollars each. Sot more than one prize will be awarded any single competitor, thoug'i as many trials for a prize as are desired will be permitted. The favors colored will be published If suitable, and the awards will be made as early iu Jan., 1WJ, as practicable. A few specimens ot tho last puzzle-nuking are given this week. Can we not beat them. Answers. 2,440. b-M I T-tt B-O a K-r a-T 8 A-k 8-U 0 P-S 2,:i.0ne was a son of toil, and the other was a ton of soil. 2.442. A. Sham, ham, am. B. Skill, kill, UL 2,UX T A I TA Rli ACE I R I L A L ADDLE C A L ICE ELECTOR EB 2.444. Wasp, asp. 2.445. Onset, stone.notes, tones, Tone, note, Eton, ton. 2,44. Profitable. 2,447. Hann jh, Otto, Asa, Bob, Anna, Ada, Eve, Lil, Kan, -Pop." Old Friends. New York Sun. Magistrate (to prisoner) "Is this the first time you have been before me, Uncle Itastus?" Uncle Ilastus " Yes, sah; butyo' poo' ole father, who was jedce fo' fo'ty years. I wa orten tip befo'. lfe and nie was ole frien a, yo' lions h; Meed we wna.'' A htorm of Cnb. New York Sun. Toliceman (to citizen clinsring to lamp post) "Shall I hail a cab, friend?" Citizen "G-5rabbu8, no (hie), ofTshur: don't (hie) call auy more cubs; they're hail in' all rouo' now."

R. R. R. RADWAY'S Ready Relief

The Chenpcit and Best Medicine for Family Use la the World. SUMMER COMPLAINTS Looseners, Diarrhea, Cholera Morbus or painful discharges from the bowels, are stopped ia M't.vrj t twenty minutes by taking Railway's lidy Ii.!irf. No congestion or inflammation, no weakness or l.i sltude, no bad after erleeia will follow the uie of the K. It. Belief. Thirty to sixty drops In half a tumbler of water will in a few minutes cure Crumps, r-prains, Snir Stomach, Heartburn, Siek Headache, Diarrhea, Dysentary, Colic, Wind iu the Bowels, and all internal pains. Travelers rhoold slwav carry a bottle of RADWAY'S KHADY 1;i:L1F with them. A few drops In water will prevent slekne or pains from a change of water. It is better than French Brandy or Bitters as a stimulant. A Family Necessity. Sawta Fe. Kas., Au?. ?3, "J7. Dr. Kadway A Co.: Your valuable medicines are a necessity in our family ; we entirely rely on tho Ready Relief and Fills for what they are recommended, and they never fall to pive M!factim. illtf. UF.Or.UR LOIIMILXLIt. MALARIA, Chills and Fever, Fever and Ague Conquered. RADWAY'S READY RELIEF Not only cures the patient seized w ith this terrible foe to settlers In newly-settled districts where the malaria of ague exists, but if tho people exposed to it will, every rooming on Retting out of bed, take 2') or CO drops of the Ready Relief in a glass of water and drink it, and eat, say a cracker, they will escape attacks. Practicing with R. R. R. Montagve, Tex. Dr. Rad'cay J Co.: "I hive been usiuir your medicines (or tha last twenty jenrs and in all caees of Chills and Fever I have tiev r failed to cure. 1 never use anything but your Itcidy Relief and Pills. TIIOS. JON LS. FECITl-AXD, Ia., An. 8, 1887. Dr. Ritdrai: We are using your medicine for Typhoid and Malaria Fevers with the greatest benefit. What vour Ready Relief and Tills have done no one ran ti ll. JOHN &CHÜLTZ. Mr. John Morton of Verplanrk I'oint, N. Y., rrorrietor of the Hudson River Brick Manufacturing ompanv, says that be prevents and eure. r.ttacks f chills anil fever in his family and amou the men in his employ by the use of Radway's Ready Rkmf.p and Rills. Also the men in Mr. Frot s brickyard at the same place rely entirely on tha Ii. Ii. Ii. for the cure and prevention oj malaria. FEV Lit AND AUUL cured for 50c, There Is not a remedial spent in this world that will euro Fever and Arue and all other Malarious, Billons. Trpho'.d and other Fevers (aided by RADWAY'S PILLS) so quickly as Radway'a I lead y Relief. The Only Pain Remedy That Instantly stops the most exrrneiatin pnln, allays Inflammation and cores congestion, n nether of the Lungs, Stomach, Bowels or other glands or organs by one application IX mOil 0XE TO TWEN TT IIXUTI3 No matter how violent or excruciating the pain the Rheumatic, Red-riddn, lotirm. Crippled, Nervous, Neuralgic or prostrated with disease, may utfcr ITADWAY'S READY BELIEF Will Afford Instant lisc. Inflammatlm of the Kidneys, Inflammation of tho Bladder, Inflammation of the Rowels, Congestion of the Lungs, Sore Throat. Difficult Breathing, Palpitation of the Heart, Hysterics, C roup. Diphtheria, Catarrh, Influenza, Headache, Toothacho, Neuralgia, Rheumatism, Cold Chills, Ague Chills, Nervousness, Sleeplessness. The application of the READY RELIEF to the part or parts where the difficulty or pain exists will attord ease and comfort. Tain Stopped in Two Minutes. Tvxr.vn Park, . Y. Dr. Radway: I had the toothache for nearly a week and tried all kinds of medicines without any good, when, on gottin one of your almanacs, I n your Ready Reliel spoken of. X purchased a bottle and only put three or four drops in my tooth, when the pain was stopped in two minutes. J. S. WARNER, Gamekeeper. Fifty Cents per Bottle, Sold by Druggists. DR. RADWAY'S SARSAPARILLIAN RESOLVENT, Great Blood Purifier. Pare blood makes sound flesh, strong bone and a clear skin. If you would have your fhh firm, your bones sound and your complexion fair, use RADWAY'S SAK3APARILLI AN RESOLVENT. It possesses wonderful power in curinir all forms of Scrofulous and Eruptive Diseases, Syphiloid Fleers, Tumors, Sores, Enlarged Glaud, etc., rapidly and permanently. Dr. Randolph Mclntyre of M. HyaciDlhe, Can., says: "I completely and marvelously cured a victim of Scrofula in its last stao by following your advice given in your little treatise on that disease." J. V. Trunnel, South St. Louis, Mo., "was eurel of a bad ease of scrofula after having been given up as incurable." Dr. Piidway's Sarsaparillian Resolvent, A remedy composed of ingredients of extraordinary medical properties, essential to purify, heal, repair and inviirorate the broken down and wasted body. Quick, pleasant, safe and permanent ia its trcairaent and cure. Sold by all Druggets. ONE DOLLAR PER BOTTLE. DE. RADWAY'S Regulating Pills, Tho Great Liver and Stomach Remedy. Perfect Turfratives, Soothing Aperients, Act Without Pain, Always lieliable, and Natural in their Operation. A Vegetable Substitute for Calomel. Perfectly tasteless, cWantly coated with sweet gum, purge, regulate, purify, cleanse and strengthen. RADWAY'S PILLS ior the cure of a!l disorders of the Stomaeh, Liver, Bowels, Kidneys, ISia lder, jferTous Diseases, Loss of Appetite, Headache, Constipation, Costlveness, Indigestion, Dvpefia. E'liousuf, Fever, Inflammation ol the iioweisj Piles, and all derangements of the Internal i.scera. Purely vegetable, containing no mercury, minerals, or deleterious drugs. What a Physician Says of Rad way's Pills. I am selling your Ii. R. Relief and your rgulatlntr Pills, and have recommended them above all pills and sell a great many of t hem, and hare them on hand alwavs, and use thein ia ray practlco and in my own family, and expect to, In preference of all Tills. Yours respertfully, DR. A. C. MIDDLEBROOK. Doraville, Oa. DYSPEPSIA. Dr. Radwav's Pill are a cure for this complaint. They reatore'strength to the stomach and enable it to perform its functions. The symptoms of Dyspepsia disappear and with them tha liability ot the system to contract diseases. Radway's Pills and Dyspepsia. Newport, Kt., Feb. 27. 13.37. fevs. Pr. Radsvay &. Co Jeuto: I havo been troubled with Dyrepsia for shout four months. I tried two different doctors without any permanent benefit I saw your ad., and two weeks ao bouehla box of your Regulators and feel a trreot deal better. Enclosed tind sump, please send me your book False and True. Your Pills have done me more cod than all the Doctor' Medicine that 1 have taken, eto. I am, your respectfuldy ROBERT A. FA (JE. Dyspepsia of Long Standing Cured. Dr. Radway I hsve for many years been afflicted with Dyspepsia and Liver ( oninUiut, and found but little relief until I got your Pills and Resolvent, and they made a perfect cure. Tbeysrethe best medicine I ever had in my life. Your friend forever. Blanchard. Mich. WILLIAM NOON AN. Sold by Prupsrists. Trice 23c per box. Head "FALSE AND TUCK." Send a letter stamp to Radway i Co. , No. 32 War ren, corner of Chur-n street. New York. Information worth thousands will be sent you. To the Public. Be sure and ak for RADWAY'S and see that the name "RADWAY " is oa what you buy.

vf V N tV ?Vr ?

irxACOUAINTTO WITH TMS OOSAPHY C 1H( COCTWv WH OaTAJK MJCH INfCRMATlCJI rOM A tTUOV OF Trtl iupc'TkI CHICAGO, ROCK ISLAED & PACIFIC H Ita main linos and bra.r.ths lnclua CTHCAOO. prcRLA, MOLn.'r, i:cc:z rLA:;s, davts port, era noiJL-s. co-xcil eltjtts. ires. CATEiE. KANSAS OTTT, CT. JCL.?IL IXAV. LNT.xr.iu, Aicmcox cedau EAIIDS. Waterloo. mr:;rvpoLis. ad st. r-Aui ana scores cf Intcnncti.ate cities. Choico oi routca to and freni the r..cl2o C-aet. All trassiere la Uuioa depots. l ast trfclna cf lice Day Coaches, elcßnnt D'.zg Cars. taagniScent Pull man rahico Elvcpors, r.al (be'.-wce.i Chicago, 6tJoseph, Atcblsoa and Canoas C:t7) BccUalng Chair Cars. . Seat Tree, to fcoldera of through Cret-ckiM tickets. Chicago, Kensr.s t Kebraska R'y Creat Rock Uland Route. Exxdj West and Southwcht from r&nen city ndBt. Joseph to KELECn. HORTON.. EEIXBVTLLE, TÜLT.KA. rTERIJTCrCir, VvICUITA. HVTC1HN-30N. CALDVTXXL, cjitU joU-Ula KAN 3 A3 AKD SOUTilZRN NSSRASKA and beyond. lntlre paessnrer eQul;;taent of thm celcbrutoU Pullnjf.a n:finiii'actur8. All thfety anpliancea and xnodaru improvement. The Famous Albert Loa Route Is tie favorite between CTfcnpo. Sock lalrnd. . Atchison. Kansas City and UinnaspcUs and tit. PauL Ita VütcrtcATO branch t avert.es the gree. "WH-AT AKD DAISY CELT" cf Northern Io"sra, Souttwctter-i SlinaosoLa, and Last Centred Dahota to Watertovra, Cpirlt Lak. ßioux Folia and many otiicr torsa and c; Jos. The Ehort Lic via Beneeo and KarJtakM offers) superior faciiitlon to travel to and froza Indianapoüs, Clnrlacnti and ether Scutixra point. For Tickets. Map. Fcliifrs, crclcrirod uJormation, arply at asy Coupoa TizLct CCkcor address E.ST.JOrJ, C. A. HCLCROOK, ueai liOJ-Hfe-cr. Gl n'l XSL & rfisa. Wh is tvcAK, rr.vors. tri:ii.iTA Ti:i. wf i:i Ms FOLLY and IliMli; C has I Itll l.l ! away his M4.!to( HOItY. MIM anl 51 A MOO 1. a'irg exba istln? drains upo'i the I l". TAINS of I.I IL, lIEAIi lilt HAt lir, Dread'ul Drenms. WEAHMiss if Memrr, Itldill Fl'liXIAS in HiH ilVI Y. I,llllI.I.!Suro!l the r.M T.. and nli tne LFI'Ll'TS leedit. to F.AHLY mmYr.ril po'l.nps 0.M .M PTIO.V or nsAM I'Y. thimM c-ns'ilt atone the CF.LF.RKATEU Dr. Clarke. EMaMishM J1. I r Clarlro ban nde M'UVOl H DFniLITY. ( IHloMi er n Diseases of the (JEMTO rm.AUY urenns a Lifo t-tudy. It makes N diiVrcnre WHAT you tare trken or YVIlo ha fi lled to cure you. Jt1y im LI :s uiTorin? from diso je? peculiar to their sex cr.n consult with the assurance of speedy relief and cure. Send 2 cents postage for works on your diw ascs. icn l 4'centJ piT!n?i for relchmted Works on Chronic. ervmn and Dell rnte Dicrres. (VwFuimion, porTArmiiy or by letter, free. Consult the Iii Iicior. Tbonn(lsi ctiml, Ofttor and psirlor private. V8-1 hose coi.temp'ntincr Marriaca p-nd Ut Dr. ( Inrlie's celebrated U'd Male and Fe-mitlc, eaih 16c.. both V. (tamp). Refore confi'iinp yoiir case, consult Ir. t LA Uli K. A friendly ietU r or etil trsy save future ui!erinirani sMp.ire. an-! add poV.ea years to life. r-üook "I if- (secret Er ror,' Vic. Stamps). Msdieiue end writings sent evervwhe-e, eure from eipoiart. Hours, 8 to 8: hundavs. tto ix Address, P. D. CLARKE, M. D. 183 So. Clark St.. OUICAGO, III 3 m ill! For is years at 37 Court Tlice, now at 322 Market Street J nillpTTv Bet. Third and Fourth, iibu.:) I lliJjiij A rrt -liartT K:e4 aal I;h.It t)uI.Vd hTii.-iaa sod IDS k.Mt iuccess.'ui, si bis .iarui-e will P'ot-. Cures rll forms of PRIVATTI. CHRONIC and SLZUAL DISEASES. . 9 Spermatorrhea ccd Impotency, Mtl.ern iU of r t i.- lo Tnutli, rnvcl 1 la lurwystri. or o:ter can-n. sr.J rnxi'jruf stt. c f ic ! lowing rte-t. Net voi ..if .. Semir! f oit.-.n-i... IDk'-trncjH Sl. n nv lrnia) Dimit-.. n( t. LI. Dr-"." Lein" Fcj t -I l-r? . Pun IJ 'o j ar, A rmr-o U Srirt ef F.iai r. Coofu.luo of Itimt. cf frt VMl Tfver. rvn.ltnbf a-atlr eur.-d. SYPHlLi IS "i-1"'-' 'urr r ' Vt'" j t.iu; Gonorrhea, GLkEL P.rWIiire. OivUili. Frn , v. in-rlui: I'll- ol ü(a?r prrt dif,ii qui.:W curM. ll it fi' rvil.al thil ihr rirtan L I,T ' f1' '""I" In t rrtu'.n cli i f at ai. ! tivai u( th.-tuDdi no alt, 4imrfi,mtiii!l. rhtsl'"'.i.r.i kl"!r.r ü:li fart o.(l raceoo)cd f "c to mv care. M hen ti 1 l-cnwroimt im ulttüTitf fr trramut, inedVinet eaa beatot fmaic Li lu.'nlr by a ,.l or ez;irwi au'Wbrr-. Cnrrs Guaranteed ia all Cases nndortalten. l'o:iU-UUiu. --rnr.t'.iT or t VtttT f-a SOÄ tr!M. Ciiargea rcuoutuie Li cormpoultc-c itncUy coiXjarua A PRIVATE COUNSELOR, Of BS rtioa, Mit to nj atMmt, uil? ...IM, frr ttiiry (''l rrr'. 8ltould rai tv au. A4.r.M at asrs. VO,n lours man A. U. to I. ii. BuJaj a, 1 10 4 r. Jfc EXHAUSTED VITALITY. A Great Medical Work for Young an4 Middle Ayed Jct. KROW THYSELF. More Than One Million Conies So'd. n treats tt;vn nervon and phvinl rlebilitT, pre, manne decline, exhaii-t.-.l viulity, impair-! rinr and imi-iiritios oi the blrwid. and the un toH nÜ!-rus tN'ii-. i n. iit tiu riMii. i'ontaius ZÖ0 pair. sutiManml eiulKivvrtl l.in iiiis, lull pill. Warrant! the Itt popular iin-di.-al tr.Mii- putl:.hed ia thf Lnalisli laniiaee, I'riee only SI hy ina.l, rslri.l, and concealed If a plain trrsipor. Iliti.tra'ed sanv pie fre if von foud now. lu I ! i. by the lValoU ledieal l:ititin-, No. 4 Huli'nrh Urox-l. lloston, Ma-s., Win. 11. I'irker, M. !., Consulting Physician, to houi all ordei-s bhouU bo adJrese L GRATER" L-CO M FC RTIN 0. EPPS'S COCOA. BREAKFAST. Ty a thorough kii U'.lo of the natural lawj srhich porern the operations of dhriV.ion and outri tion, and h a careful anpiicstijn i the fine proper ties of well-selectixi Cocoa, Mr. Lps haa provided our hreakfoAt tables with a deiicauly flarorei berer age which miT save us many heavy doctors bills. It is by the imlicious uo of such ari'eles of diet that a constitution may be (gradually buiit up until stronf enouph to reMSt ffery U'n lcnry to disease. Hundreds of subtle maladies arn nnating aronnd u ready to a 1 Lau k berever there is a ras poitiu W mat escape tnanv a fatal shaft by fceeiiinK ourselrea weil fortined with pure blood and a properly Dourihe4 frame." Civil service Curette. Made simply with boiling water or mltk. 8ol4 only in half-pound tins, b orocers, lalcled ibaa: J AilLa Li f o A O-K, llomaopatliie Chemisu. London. Lnclaod. DlJ.Owcks Body Battery! win posirTl enre nhond. It hrnsia. l.o l M tlattt. Mbt Unn, ra rnlKlK. ktlaeaaara ot laa enlto t rlaurw Driaih special licit for Ladies for lrre(tilr Montbllea and KeittHl Complaint. Con. tains 10 1ccr-c of ureraib. :urre?it can be revnlsied like a b.tttery. and applied to any part of ihe bort or lirnba br bole famllT. Fit F F. art1 11 ti. t railed PnaapMlct. air. Mi' prlc. imimnniaia. m.rbri le in. and rmipie applicauoa V I 1 i V', Trifg S6 end 3. for th cure of disease. DR. OWEN BELT CO., 1S1 Stale SI.. Chicago. ptercinl er ttailmnd 1 rleffra pht. Tbe (mt V.VLLMLMi iiltÜs IANLotll.l.U Ullta Mtp x ne cnnniry torrow op In nir

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(4m

V . w -wasac

TELEGRAPHYF&?, I irsitaalrsal wark. W"will lencb tbor " ua Uly. and rnt tdi hi work In wihor t ain