Indiana State Sentinel, Volume 34, Number 17, Indianapolis, Marion County, 30 May 1888 — Page 3

THE INDIANA -STATE SENTINEL, WEDNESDAY, MAOS, 1888.

HE CORNERED THE OLD TOM I

AND THEN HAD TO VISIT A DOCTOR. Other Reading for Hoya nnrt Girl An Old Merchant A Chilli' Tra?edy Tommy's Joke Knew That Hoy Too Well. K RAGGED, nnkempt newsboy Jk pulled the bell of Dr. George F. M Shrady and nskcd the servant if the "doc. was in." Just then Dr. ' Shrady emerged from the parlor, and the newsboy made a rush at him with an upturned thumb. ". What's the matter, boy?" asked the doctor. "Pisen'd thumb, doctor," answered the youth. "How?" "Cat." "Il'm ! come in." The Kaniin marched into the ßtndy and bad his "piscnM" thumb duly doctored. Purin the process he explained that he had been chasing a rat. "I cornered the old Torn in an ash barrel" continued the newsboy, "an jes' as I was pullin' the black cuss out by the tail he goes back on hissclf, turns around and gives? me an almisrhty bite." "Why did you come to me?" asked Dr. Ehradv. "Oh"! I didn't want to go to any o' them common fizzLshuns." 'Tut uncommon physicians want'nncommon fees," said the doctor, eying the urchin; "how much have you got?" The boy dived into his nipped trousers pocketj fished out some cents and held them in his opened, dirty hand. Dr. Hirady smiled and told him to put them back. "Say, Doe," says the lad, determined to pay (something; here take a Düly Noos, and he flopped one on the table. Just as he got to the door of the Etudy he suddenly turned back and said: "Say, Doctor, I only got 'nother left; yer might ters as well have this," ad Hopped the second Daily Xuo$ on the table. Theu lie paddied off to the front door, hitcliinjr up his trousers, but a thought seemed to strike him suddenlv, and turning back he peered in at the study door and eaid, as he pulled a lock of his hair: "Say, Doc, lVe forgot ter thank ycz." Dr. "Shrady has had many rich patients, but this is "the first time "he has had a patient's whole stock in trade as a fee. An Oh! Merchant. Youth's Companion. The following storv is told of Jonathan fcturgess and Kobert Lenox. Jonathan, a rustic lad from Cape Cod, arrived on a Tessel in New York on Saturday night, a etranger and penniless. On Sunday morning he looked around for a church. He found the old Wall-st. house of worship mar Broadway. He stood on the steps while the gay throrg passed in. The grandeur of the place appalled him. Kobert Lenox, a prominent member of the church, was always interested in young men. He paw the rustic lad and vent up and Fpoke to him. "Are you a stranger in the city?" "Yes sir; I arrived last night." "So vou came at once to the house of God ? Vould you like a seat ?" "I would." The bashful lad was ushered into Mr. Lenox's own pew. The next morning he eought out a dealer in sail cloth. He wanted credit for a little canvas. "Did I not see you in Mr. Lenox's pew yesterday?" said the merchant. "I don't know who.se pew I sat in, but ft kind gentleman gave me a seat." "Well, lad, that was Mr. Ienox, and it is no common honor to be asked to sit in his pew. I will tru?t any boy with goods" w ho has had that honor conferred upon him." To the day of his death Mr. Sturgess Faid that his success dated from that Sunday. Skeleton of n Tlire-Act Tragedy. New York World. Mr. B. L. Far j eon, the I'nglish novelist, has rive children. The eldo.-t, a little girl of six or seven years, was recently taken to the theater fur the tirst time, and the performance made a. great impression upon her. The next day she was seen busily writing, and was fuund to have composed the following drama: Persons represented: King. Queen. Scene 1. Queen discovered sitting alone Bowing. She pricks her finger and savs: "Oh ! I wish I had a little girl with bläck eyes and golden hair." The queen expires. Scene F.ntcr king. King "Oh ! the queen i3 dead. I must go marry again." Exit king and that's all. lit Praying For. Washington Critic J Kitty is three years old and her brother, tw o years older, is not an angel by several degrees. The other night, after saying her Tracers, she said to her mother: "5'ow, mamma, isn't there something else that I should pray for?" "Yes, Kitty; pray that the Lord will make vou a better girl and George a bet ter "boy." Kitty iolded her hands and closed her eyes. "And, dear Lord," she whispered, "make Kitty a good little girl aud Amen." "Why, Kitty," expostulated her mother, "that isn't right. Vou should pray for your brother, too." . "I think not, mamma. I know that boy too well." In Pursuit of Knowledge. New York World. Little Alfred is a Brooklyn four-year-old and remarkably inquisitive. Recently a rray-haired professor of natural history from a westerr; college was visiting the family, ami n one particular evening a large company of ladies ami gentlemen were invited to meet him. Little Alfred was allowed t be in the room, and having been told that the venerable guest knew ail about about animals took advantage of a moment's pause in the general conversation to stand ii in his corner and exclaim in a loud voice: "Ft Ksor( professor), bow do they make tats (cats) ?" ."shouts of laughter followed this unexpected episode, in the midst of which the youthful investigator was hurried oli' to bed. An Orphan Asylum. (Port J rr in Oazette. Bobby and Flossie were playing "board-ir.g-house," with Flossie in the role of applicant. "Have you parents?" inquired Bobby, with great stiflncss of. manner. "Yes, sir. two," replied Flossie, timidly. "Sorry, ma'am, but we never take children who have parents." One of Tommy's Joke. Pbtlsdelpht Times.) How old are you. Tommy?" "Nine when I'm on mv feet, and six when I stand on tny head' "That's funny how do yon make it?" "Why, if you stand a 'J on its head it's a 6, isn't it?" An Itifrenions Hnbatltntlon. Scm York World.) Little Charlie usually counts the strokes of the clock to tell whnttime it ia. Not noticing the other day when it commenced

to strike he said to his mother: "Mamma, what time did the clock stike?" "Shame, said mamma; "Charlie must talk plain 'say 6trike.' " After a moment's silence he looked up brightly and asked: "Mamma, what time wa3 it when the clock hit?" Papa's Lingual Ac com pllahmenta. TroyT'.mes. "You seem thoughtful this evening, Bobby," said the minister, who was making a call. "Mr. Goodman," inquired Bobby, rousing himself, "what. ha-vocabulary?" The minister kindly told him. "I heard it this morning." lotby explained, "and I don't know what it meant. Ma said she had no idea whata vocabulary pa had until she heard him taking down the parlor stove." No. 23 7 4. A Kebai.

Something littlo Charlie did one pleasant May morning in order to read "Knotty Problem." No. 3372. An Unseen Corner. There comes unseen a merry sprite Where in the vales I luTe to wantler, Whose quiet scenes are hit delight Whoso beauties much I love to ponder. If tltere my thoughts aloinl I tell. This sprite, whom no one ha in keeping. Bound over field and brook and dell, And makes reply while 1 am speaking. I rail to her some friendly word. But this she only tuituirs, mocking: I laii;h outright 'tis ; ab.-urd, What though 'tis to good manners shocking. When silent I return alone, The sunset shadows o'er me falling, And reach at last my hillside home, the answers promptly to my calling. There is a proverb widelv known That say the child is ike its father; And 1 will here in candor own That I am of this sprite the author. Sea. No.23T0-A Numerical Enigma. Those fonj of vectaf le food Eat Lto 4 and call them good; 5, 6, 7 must surciy fieaii An insect we have often seen; I to 7 is one wlmie toil Gels its reward from well-tilled soil. ELSOMaN. No. 237" Robert Want to Know. 1. How ten pins or Pticks of equal length may be laid upon the table so ns to spell out the name of a great money-making establishment. 2. How nine of the pins or sticks may be bo rearranged as to name a manufactory of money-making material. 3. How the directions in which four of these pins or Micks point may be changed, and cause the nine to indicate au important moneyconveying document. No. 2,378. Triple Letter Enljma, In "common fare," In "fruit to spare," In "sharp" and keen, In "halting" mien. An oM-fashionei dainty I bring, I bring; The praises of Mai 1 aim;, I firm. Come gather the primal with muir and laughter, The nrrt, well-conditioned, will soon follow niter, ThAiwl will sputter and dance in the kettle; lu votaries claim it the truest of uctuLs. Teanza. No. 2,379. Curtailment. Open I am, and public, too. Conspicuous and plain 4o you. When curtailed I nm a small plate. To be. used at the Lucbarist is my fate. Aeain of my tail deprived a strange paradox I'm the top of the head of a man or a fox. Curtailed again, I'm ready, fit. There's a me of butter and I'ui to tap it. Again curtailed, I'm often heard To shorten a paternal word. Curtail me now is to cut me In two, A pair of letters will look at you. A. B. G 1X5 EE. No. 2, "SO. A Double Acrostic. WORDS OF SEVEN LETTERS. 1. A book or table containing a calendar, etc. 2. iVrtuiniii? to a eine. 3. A cure-all. 4. A plank at the head of a fhip to truard against i'-e. 5. Pulverized volcauic substances. 0. To etl'use . rituals and finuls, two well known makers of "knotty problems." Pat Kiot. No. 2,381. A Charade. If KUi.T at seconi laughs, as people say, 'Tis In a kind of t!tiraiivo way; Yet nii-T is seldom thwarted In its course I'.v si;i om., or by uny kind of force; A whoi.k was worn by Kiilithuten of ton W hen jueca Elizabeth was on the throne. Is'elsoüuj. No. 2,381. Decapitation. Deprive of its head "A flat-hot tomed boat," And now in its stead, "A chi:uney-csp'' note. Ancil.nt Mariner. Answers 2Xt T.ob-lin. 2,:i."! . Sba k pcare. U,:W I. :;.3.irj:', 1 pou nds. L:iil. fvowl, cowl, owl. , '-. v ecu-y. A ASP A S E ft AS SAU T I A A S P S S A S S N S S A S K 11 S S I N A T E I S T.E D S T I N T K D S N " S A E 1) T D E 2,364. Cnst-a-net. it, 365. Mill, ill, I. Our Grandmothers' Way. Toledo Blade. The old-f.nhioned courtesy of our grandmothers is being revived again, though in a modified form. At a recent reception at the white house a fair young girl was preaented to the president. As he took her hand she ducked down alout six inches with a movement which niijrht be termed the lightnine courtesy. The same little bob was repeated a moment later as she shook hands with Mrs. Cleveland. Some of the bystanders exclaimed: "How awfully country!" but were quickly subdued by au explanation coming from one of the initiated. The trick is the latest Knplish custom on being presented to people of note. The movement is a difficult one, nnd if universally udopted the fair society belles will find souie difficulty in !)crfctting themselves in the accomplishment, or, unlike their grandmothers, the early education of the modern y'trl iu that respect has been neglected. Courtesies and backboards wrrc lon.cj atro consigned to oblivion as oldfashioned and cut of date. Now, together with the old spinning-wheels, they are beiogbrought to light and favor once more. Heurtles Unit. f ninrhampton Keyublicaa.l Mrs. Smith "I left tli house a fewminntpj this afternoon, John, and baby destroyed those two ci'Jurs you left laying on th toot-rest." Mr. SmithThe ueihllin little thiu?! She ouuht to have beo;T punished. Those cigars cost ine twenty cents. Mrs. Smith "And your terrier pnppy completely ruined my new spring; bonnet. Mr. Siniih-"iIo! ho! hot . The frisky little rascal ! I tell you, Maria. thcr' mettle iu that PUP" Ho Was Acquitted. Nebraska 8 Uta JooraaL ' Police Judge "Prisouer, von are charged with having brutally assaulted this mua." ' "1 admit it, your honor, but there were extenuatinir circumstances. , . "Of what nature?" "Why this man asked me if a hn and a half laid an crir and a half in a day and a half how many -1 " That will do. You are dischargee!. Slckne In Europe. , , New Tork Son. Old Mr. Bently (reading the paper) "I aee that tl kinsr of IS pain ij sick." Old Mrs. Uetitly "Goodncsa, Joshua, I hope be hasn't gota cancer, too!" Old Mr. Ucatly "o, he's tecthirjj."

SOLID ADVICE TO A LOVER.

THE RIGHT COURSE FOR THE YOUTH. Uenry Gny Carl et on Olves Some Tal nable Pointers to the Impecunious" and Hesitating but Madly Infatuated J. Oliver Kane IT GIVES me the heartburn tö receive a letter like the following, which camo yesterday: Adams Texter, N. Y., ) May the löth. J DeabSib: lam twenty-two years of ace and am studying law in the office of Judge L'hapln, and my present income is somewhat limited, but 1 though 1 would write to you and a.-k your kind advice in a matter which has given me great concern and likewise unhappiness. 1 am in lore with a young lady here and I think she is in love with me. 1 met her first at the brass-bund picnic which went to Henderson last 4th of July. She swooned from the excessive heat and I carried her ho-ie, and thus it was our love bejrau. I have escorted her to all the sociables and to our debating society, and at the strawberry festival, which is coming" 00' next week, I hope to have the engagement announced. Uut before 1 do I write you this letter in order to satisfy myself that 1 am doing right by myself and by her. She is seventeen nnd a haJf years oid, and h:is blue eyes and blondine hair, and is a graduate of our high school, but her father has often said that she will not know her owu mind for several j'ears to come. I know that her parents want her to lead a frivolous society hie for several years and then to marry wealth, which I will never have. Now, I love her and 1 think that she loves me, only, on my present income, until I can practice at the bar and tight my own way to the summit of fortune and fame, 1 cannot hope to support her iu queenly style. I do not tee why, as her mother already has two hoarders, 1 coiild- not be one of them, even if I were her daughter's husband, and I write to a.-k you if you do not think that will be the best way out of our ditüeulty. Enclosed please rind 2-cent stamp, and, thanking you for your kiudncss, I am yours rVpy, J. Oliver Kaxe. P. S. I write to vou jn strict coutidence. This is a complicated case and one requiring a great delicacy of discrimination and nicety of judgment to determine, but 1 am certain that if you take my. advice in a large allopathic hunk it will reach the right spot, J. Oliver, and do you much good. Your certainty that you love her and your uncertainty that ehe loves you lead me to believe that you have been backward in coming forward. Of course I can readily underhand that your complicated Ftruyles with a course of subpu'iia, certiorari, mandamus, habeas corpus, dueoätecum, nolle pros., josse comitatus, replevin, nulU bona, de lunatico inquirendo, in hoc nigno vinees, E I'luribus Unura, Erin go bragh, de minimis non curat lex, quo warranto, no exigeat, and other delights of your learned profession, when combined with moonlight, alabaster cheeks and the melting sapphire eyes of a golden-haired girl, are apt to produce a species of mental malaria and sentimental indigestion well calculated to lower the tone of the system of any young and ambitious citizen of Adams Centre, N. Y. Nevertheless, it appears to me that ample time has been atl'orded you since that happy and yet lamentable picnic which you describe to have grasped her young aifections gently, yet lirruly, led rose-winged love a captive to your manly charms, and, in response to the hoarse masculine ardor of your devotion, learned from her twittering lips that she loved you in return. I have trembled, J. Oliver, many, many times since reading your sad, "soulful epistle, to think that perhaps, even after that mad 4th of July episode and the long course of sociable gayeties and silent kerosene vigils in which you have since indulged, your only own girly girl may be leading you through a labyrinth of bamboozle, toying with the noblest of vour emotions and merely dancing like a little careless glittering mote through the broad shafts of the sunshine of your tropical worship. Woman! O woman ! exquisite, adorable, red-lipped woman, inconstant as the changeful moon, and or Hut this is irrelevant, J. Oliver. I-ct us take it for granted that she docn love you and that vour two souls are like earth's lone hemisphere fused into one with u safety fuse. Let us assume that within a week after you have perused this sober and patriarchal reply to your inquiry, you v. ill again revisit the flower-decked scene of the picnic swoon, and in some mellow moonlighted hour when the veils of purple evening are softly dropping upon the scene and the blossoming branches above you and around you arc lull of the folding and fluttering of weary wings; when the early lire-fly jewels the gloom with its fitful torch; when the whippoorwill shrills from the distant copse ami the drowsy rooster clucks a good-night to hiä sleepy harem and composes himself to rutlled dreams there, under the broad canopy spangled with glory, you will take her so(t, unresisting hand in yours; you will murmur the tremendous question ; there will be a silence; slowly and coyly her dainty head, with its lovelocks tossed awry, will sink upon your breast, and then the young-eyed stars will eaze with rapture upon vour first, long and unutterable betrothal kiss. Ah me ! J. Oliver, that moment will be one for which you would not take S17. But this is not all. In your present frame of mind you lookforward to that as the end, -whereas to my cool and somewhat cynical eye it is but the beginning. From what you have told me of her parents, of their desires, ambitions and purposes, and of the calm and somewhat sordid way in which they seem' to regard your advances, I am inclined to think that your future will have a few clouds and perhaps a light sprinkling of wet rain. I regret to say that I cannot discuss this subject except in a brief, cursory and unsatisfactory manner,'- but it appears to me that your proposition to tike up board with the old folks'nfter your marriage is not one which will be conducive to unalloyed bliss. There is a certain busincMS element inserted in your cup of joy which may possibly ppoi I the flavor. After a year or two you may find that with your enlarging prospects you would like to change your hotel, vary your bill of fare, occupy a room with a southern instead of a northwestern exposure, try a new brand of Persian powder, or introduce some other little modification in your domestic arrangements to add to your comfort. Under ordinary conditions this i very easy, but where the tr.crrcuary interests are intimately commingled with the connubial you may find it dillieult. It jrives mo pain, J. Oliver, to inform you that upon the whole I think youra is a desperate case. You hold u ticket in a. lottery which has not been drawn, and us nearly as I can cipher it out you have but a slight chance for even an approximation. Hut perhaps I am anticipating. 1 earnestly trust that nt the cominz strawberry festival of which you speak all will go well. Dut it seems to me that instead of figuring upon future board bilU just at present you should concentrate your powerful energies upon first getting; the girl. Having loaded her up with all tho sour berries and frozen custard which her system can stand, you will certainly find her powers of resistance at their very lowest ebb, and while she is still in a partially comatose condition you may extort from her a pronuso to marry you and thus give , you something . really substantial to build upon. When you have accomplished thia and the splendor of a brandnew $2..rX) amethyst emblazons the third finger'of her little darling left hand, and when you have broken the news gently

but haughtily to tho old folks and " they have given you in return a largand obnoxious piece of their mind, you may write to nie again in strict confidence and I will give you further advice. At present your affairs are in an entirely too hazy condition to give an opinion. Get the girl, J. Oliver, get the gf rl and get thee gone. Henry Guy Cahletox. A CHALLENGE TO SULLIVAN. Ii ill 'yo Proposes to Out-talk the lioston ISoanerses. Bill Nye, the Staten Island Fet, yesterday handed to the II orMthe following document with a request for immediate publication and two copies of the paper to be forwarded to his address: To Col. John Lawrence Sullivan, Boston, Mass. Sir: I see that at your testimonial last evening, in Music Hall, you guarantee to lick the next man you 6tand up against. I also notice with pain that for some time you have been unsuccessfully looking for your peer, and like Goliath of Gath walking up and down before the regular army and begging in loud and ungrammatical terms ior some pentleman to come and tread on the tail of your coat. The only sling I know anything about is your liest weapon, and so I shall not name the sling. I want to meet you on equal terms, and so I propose only such conditions as shall be fair for both of us. I hate in see a man making a w reck of himself while waiting for some one to meet him, and so 1 have decided to challenge you. I have only been waiting till I could get trained down so fine that removing my spectacles and the cotton from my ears would make half difference in my weight, ami now that I have reached that point I yearn to get hold of you. I now challenge you, John Lawrence Sullivan, late of England aud France, but now of lioston, Mass., to meet me anywhere in the United States or any foreign monarchy where fair play will be assifred to both, either inasixteen.twentyortwen-ty-four foot rinjr, with bare knuckles, to talk into a phonograph to a finish, for ?-"0, (X0 a side, the gate receipts and the championship of the world. I select as my timekeeper a large fourpound Waterbury watch and name as my

seconus 2oih eoster and Lydia Ji.. i mtham. In case w e are broken tip bv the police, before the contest is finisued, the purse shall go to the one having the Lest ol it at the time of the interference. As my bottle-holder I select ex-Gov. St John, of Kansas, and as sponger I shall bringan acquaintance of mine who borrows mv umbrellas and sells the: l. it shall also be the part c f the agreement that the press be fully and freely represented, each correspondent or reporter to have his expences paid to and from the contest by the losing party, whether the place selected be in this country or in Europe. All kinds of talk shall count. Everything goes slang, blow, brag, bluster, old lectures, second-hand responses to toasts, italicised wind, old Fourthof July orations, contempt for other pugilests and impassioned appeals for some one to lick will score. Each man shall strip at less than 1SÖ pounds and be allowed a bale of tin foil and a box of bronchial troches. The free list shall be suspended, with the exception of members ol the press, the Prince of "Wales and 6uch of your favorite wives as you desire to favor with tickets. The tiiiie occupied shall be six days, cr to a finish, straighta wav or catch-as-catch-can. No profanity to be allowed and no language to be used which the press shall consider improper for publication. Each contestant shall be entitled to a copy of his remarks made during the encounter and may copyright same for publication in book form afterwards. I am no pugilist, by t, when my pugilism gets within the nach of a common con wrsationalist ami conservator of Gab, I think it is a shame that you have remained unchallenged so Ion,;. I may be no match for you, but if yon will meet me on the nbr ve terms and the boys will see that we have fair play, I will guarantee that I will make it interesting for you, and that so far as I am concerned it shall be no hippodrome. Hill 'yü. New York, May H', How to (iucM the Speed of Trains. (Kansas City Times.) There is not one person in one hundred of the millions who tr;ncl on railroads iu the course of a year who h;is any Idea of the speed of a train. A lar.'c percent, of even the regular trainmen of the country cannot tell with any degree of accuracy how l'at a train is running. Frequently engineer are despatched on a trip over a line of railroad with instructions to run at a speed of a certain number of miles an hour. The engineers do not carry a speed indicator, but have learned by various methods to gauge their engines i as to make only the slightest variation from their orders. 'i he majority of engineers use their drivingwheel as a gauge. They know its circumference, and by counting its revolutions within a certain time can tell very ueeuratelv the speed at which they are running. Another method is to time the run between mile posts, and still another is to make calculations trom the number of telegraph pedes passed in a certain time. These poles, in a level country, and where four or five wires are used, are spaced so that tl.ey are thirty to a mile. If only a single wire is used they are spaced from twenty-five to twenty-eight to the mile. The most accurate method, and the one most in use by experienced railroad men, is to count the number of rail joints the train passes over in twenty seconds. The rails in nearly all cases are thirty feet in length, and the number assed over in twenty seconds is the speed per louratrain is running. For instance, it a passenger sitting in a sleeper can count thirty clicks of the wheels on a rail joint in twenty seconds the train is runniiig at the speed of thirty miles an hour. Actions Speak I.onder Tliiiu Words. Goshen Democrat. The recent Ingalls-Voorheei controversy causes a pension bureau official to state that of all the congressmen of the North, Senator Ingalis of Kansas calls up the fewest number of pension cases in the bureau. In otiier words, his pension correspondence is the smallest, while Senator Yoorhees' is larger than any other member of congress, either North or South. Senator John A. Lovun used to have the heaviest pension list before the bureau, but kince his death Senator Yoorhees takes the lead. Next to Yoorhees, the senator who sends more letters to the pension otliee is an ex-confederate general, viz., Senatot Cockrell of Missouri. He lilcs more complaints and gets more pensions allowed tlwiii any other senator or representative, republican or democrat, excepting only Senator Yoorhees, nnd J. J. IngnlU less than anyone member of either house of congress from the North. Snyiiiu of Grcut Men. San Francisco F.xsmlner.l The Emperor Frederick "Man that is born of woman is of few days and full of business with Bismarck." lloulunger "France Is the universe. Faris is France. 1 am Paris. The (Var There remains but a single dia turbing element the peace of Kurope. The Kin;; of lt:ily"M;i?oah ia an admirable base of operation. It is to near the aJthiicc line." The Sultan "Behold how these brethren love one another!" (Gladstone "When my party is reunited in heaven I will again be in oiliee." Alexander of Battenberg "Darlin, I am growing bold." ' A Church Mouse. Jfew York 8nn.J "I want a warrant for the arrest of a hated rival," said a Western yomr man. "I may be poor, but no man can insult me and get away with it." "What'a the trouble?" asked the justice. "Disturbance. It was at the wedding ceremony. I won the girl, and lust as I repeated. 'With all my worldly goods I thee endow, there came from the organ loft in the voice of my hated rival, the word 'Hats.' I go on no wedding trip until this thin? is settled!" The Hon. S. L. Van pelt, an active democrat of Shelby ville for forty years, will retire from politics after the St. Louis convention.

BOCK'S ANNIVERSARY.

How and Why the Popular Spring Reer Be. ceUed Itj filter 'anie. The jubilee of the introduction of bock beer was celebrated throughout Germany Tuesday, says the New York V. Evcrv German in town touched his lips with the favorite framing, exhilarating beverage, and more than one man is tying wet cloths about his head and drinking ice water this morning because he found bock a higher and harder kicker than he ever anticipated. ;- A German would , have been insulted yesterday if any one, had proposed to him champagne as a worthy substitute for his beloved bock. Indeed, there be those who say that therqal cause of the national antipathies between Trance and Germany is the intense jealousy that sprung up in the hearts of theFreuch w hen the children of Gambrinus discovered a beer that outranked the best product of champagne as a popular drink. Jiock beer was first brewed in Uavaria, on the Sth day of May, 1S33. The history, of its production, us related last night, Ly William Ileintz of the John Eichler brewing company presents inanv interestV.pg facts. "Cock," said Mr. Ileintz, "was first brewed to celebrajftjhe annual spring festival which the rople alonpf the Hhine had for years held on Mav 8. This day was selected becatiso the hardest winter ever known to the. valley of the llhiuc hail always broken iu force by that day. Snow has been ;kpown to fall as late äs May 7, but the day following has always been a a charmed date, and as a result became accepted all over that section as the first day ot spring.-. The name block was not given to the beer till after it was used in celebrating spiinjr. "Bock in Gorman means billy goat. The beer, being made for a special occasion, was made twice as strong as the common, everyday Lttjer. A person who can drink twenty g'nsses of common beer and carry it home without letting his wife into the secret, will be more likely to find shelter in a station house than in his own bed if he takes half that quantity of genuine bock. Tho people who drank bock for the first time did not know this, and w hen they had taken their usual everyday draughts a goes! many of them had their horns locked together .nd were butting each other around like bill v goats. "This caused a was to call thebeer bock, a billy goat beer, and the name was so apEropriate it became at once popular. Pock eer is, in this country, brewed at the opening of the Ix-er season. Every brewer in the country tries to get on the market first, and this causes it to come out here much sooner than the day on which it really ought to be brewed. George Ehret has the honor of being first this vear. Brewers only make one brewing of "bock as a rule. It is much more expensive than ordinary beer, as it contains twice as much malt and hops, and is put through an extra process of fermentation. It is really an annual treat by the brewers to their customers." A dozen or more prominent saloon keepers where a reporter of the Press sampled bock yesterday said the beverage was becoming more and more popular every year, and that now they sold their supply of bock almost as soon as they got it in. When the Locusts la a-Klooniin and the Chicken llairltln Out. When the locusts is a'b!oomln' and the chickens hatchlu' out, AfA the w.tsns is round s-sunin and the flics Is all about, And the corn is all a-pproutin'and the clover turnia' rcJ, And the skies is nil a-.'hinin in a darzle overhead, And the calacanthus blossoms is a-swavla' la the breeze, And a-winVia' to the plneys and a langhin' to tho trees, Oh! Its then we country peopio is a waatin' most to shout, When the locusts is a bloom in' and the chickens haUhin out. The cows is find the jrrass has come, they're steppin' round riht pry; The riirJen, too, is lookin' well eon.iderin' its dry; The pie-pkiut is about as good as common and the jx-as And bcaos is up and climbln' ; and the peaches didn't freeze, The calves is growin' finely and the colt's a pretty tljinn, And tn!: j tho season all la all Its like tho usual spring! Oh It's illicitly nice to watch thn things a-growln' all about, Wien the locusts is a-blooniln' and tho chickens h.itthla' out! It a'.u't so sentimental as it mar be later on Whou the leaves is all a-falliu' sad the harrest days are gone, Lut there's iu.-plration in it when the birds begin to sins When the catbird keeps a-trilliu' and the redblrd's tin the winj When the coolin' air that rises at the early dawn of day Shakes the sparkles from the grape leases in a misty, golden spray, And tltti flash louj their edges turns to silrer In the light, And thq snow-bulls nod as though they hadn't finished blcepin' quite. And the coral houeysuckle's lips are half way in a pout When tho locusts is olloomin' and tho chickens haUMn' out! Locish Speed. . May 10, 1S33. ?h WsMi't Invitetl. I was one of the 200 people lat nnjlit who uU'ercd from one of the most original and tl'ective hits of feminine malim that has ever Come within the scope of my observation, fays writet in the New York Graphic. It was at ail up-town reception. K very thins hai been dine on a scale of splciutor and effectiveness. ILe floral decorations were superb. The supper was served Ly Deluionico, anU the wine was plentiful and" dry. Uut there wasn't any music to speak of. At 10 o'clock the belles anl buds who hud been tilling up their cards With complacent satisfaction indulped in eipresbions indicative of astonishment. At 10.30 m thev were serious, at 11, in despair. fhen n clever young ftmateur played waltzes and the astounding explanation of the faux pas dime out in a note from the lender of the string Land engaged for the evening, lie said that, agreeable to instructions received that afternoim from iniladihe would delay his appearane until Wednesday next, to which date he understood tve reception had been postponed. A oup!e of VMocris in cciiiig dress started out to find the leader. They came Lack at Diidnurht with an xeeuratc description o; the bearer of the false mosnge. It proved beyond doubt to le a youiis rotnan of excellent position, known to the hste, but who for mme reason had not been invited to the house last ninht, Ity this stratagem,, she had managed to very etl'ettively nur the harmony of the occasion and debar her rivals from inspiriting waltz music. Queer, wasn't it? Some Tltlrd Americans. Cyrus W, FieM has an Kntrlish title, and can be Sir Cyrus whenever he wishes. Claus Sprvcklus is u niemlicr of the highest frnuUieh Hand nobility, his title being ;iven by the kin in return for a money loan. Mr. ' liilut of New York Union club fame has it patent of nobility from the pone. 'ir ticorge" Tullnati is the way Mr. Pullman can write his name.- in Italy, thanks to King Humbert. Mr. Murphy of Chicago is a marquis o the papal states. .Surgeon Warren Is Warren Bey, through the kindness of the khedive of Fjrypt. Mr. Uvrynn of Kan Francisco had the title of duke pfven him J ears a;;o by the ill-etarred Maximilian of Mexico. TeUithe Truth. Wsstrington Critic "Wife "What time did you get in last eight, John?" Husband "Two o'clock, niv denr." Wife NWh?re C"5 you, John?" Ius1mn1 "At werk at tny ofhee, my dear." Wiie "That's right, John; never till a lie. (To the pcrvantd' Mary, Dike Mr. Urown'a shoes o'JT the mantle-piece, and get his llitrht key out of the clock und put it in Ida puekek

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IMote the dinerence m the and those who do not uzz

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MORE BACKS are drawn out of shape by the old-fashioned sec-saw, rubbing, twisting, wrecking way of washing clothes and cleaning house than by any other means. You ruin your health, ' form, clothes, paint, and don't get the best results. Try the greatest invention of this Century in the way of soap James Pyles PEARLIXE. It does away with the rubbing, hence there is no wear and tear on body or fabric You don't have to bob up and down over a tub of soiled clothing and dirty water, inhaling poisonous odors and steam ; hence you save your health. Its success is marvellous. Millionsuse it. Millions more will use it. Economical Effective Harmless. Every grocer sells Pyle's Pearline. Beware of peddled imitations, thev'rn rtancrprnnc tmftvip vv.v

WE HAVE DECIDED if rm v r- -st it

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rather than risk the exponseof r.n cuction. GLEVELAKD DAYS and SHIRS ROHSESI

300

. . "' .:iu n iriT I in tfi 11 .t enroll. nu rnn uj iu i'ui xarms wittioat psmixrii:. herr if fully an-iimstel. sn1 in Hi hct .oiiM ronjii -on J. r Lu 1in f rwlTll v Mwl'ion- nH .fnrf i from 1 to . vrurp 1S. r.f the rh.x t Jivri'p.'; r 1 i livuiii-il rr-r.t. jurnopslia.T alwa,, ln t tLr ?ront. whe.-eror -iirn. At Tön. r-rr.rr Fir in "vs.. w 011 Uil 1" rir!y t Jh c'r8; "j" M sums t sir in 17, won Sivprpintikra 0-1 :n Ch-xt 'ir.d Kts - n J t-t!..-r- . .At fLirto Jt St.iek snd Horn Shjw. wn?1i HrM rrize. :t r,Qd .llri':iU.tn?;r:i'ul wrrpMakiT?'. rK Ktallion "1 rT bnd; nd at atae Show. l-.-;7. voti. f..r CWsud H'TI Staül'.r-. I:. M.rii i. P .T,rsr',V,olds l'aii"l 4h: onT;:nv..r,o:,K.i,l.i.tl;l.ls im Tro w. , . cn siars.ii in tbreernHcs. 'fheao Onn IJfl CTCIfC c i,-ix of !.o v.-v L-a faru'i't--. ml I THliiitblc Brxc.toceitiTwi!!io'ir ZuJ llt.'L J I LI U0 )! rrd nt arcat hart'-iin i'r! !rs, .fiT ,0 c';eo,lrPr,-"'tr-rt nrbm in Ainl. weit. 1 iirnl rr-i will 1 r.ren t rr-t.i !.ir:;PS, took Kunrniitt-cd im r-rrciitr d. For u;t iiUcjljirri. s-tJ t. 'our ii: um 1 j p:r pUwl. CEO. E. BROWN A CO.. AllF?fr . 'f aNE CO,.IU.p.'nfi

E. C. ATKINS & CQ. 1..it. y- " 1.;.-. " if

CHICHESTER'S EfiGLISKAD! AM OND BRAK'D U' rar.?Mm.y W &thc original-he only cfuljni

VA V).h fMB.J Y iWlii S Vy SAr RELIABtX.T to laoi cs ki 1 S)i run umr'jni; ofiiL)iici fin.i r II NOUKE K3 OTr-r? S 5.'5NTU''I Pi tVlwY BO. BQ I . ij CHUStSttS CHfWXAlCJ S I W8fTTS Tf5TIMCs'lJ A10 LAUGHED IN THE FACE OF A CORPSE. Tho GTiaktly Performance of a Younjf Vonian Rt the Morgue. When the news of the findincr of the body of William D. Cole, the niissinjj elevated railway pitcroan, was printed in the NVw York papers Monday, a vor.nir woman who sail .t-Le was his wift: called nt the morgues and akrd after him. Morpuekeeper White sail the body hadn't come around vet, nnd the yotiti'j woman leu. Wednesday the body came to the morgue. Cole, who was twentytwo years old, had been drowned in Little Hell ti.'tte while fishing on April -I. His remains wire unrecognizable excct by the bailees lotind on his clothing. The youn woman called n.iin at the murine and kuv A.'t M(rrtiokeeper Joe Fopirty. She neatly dressed in black. Tcarty led the way to where the body lay. The face was nearly eaten away by the fslv s. ".Show ine' thu teeth," aid the young woman calmly. Fogartv pressed back the lips and showed the Ut th. "That's him!" exclaimed tho yonnj: woman. Then rhc lauirhed. It was rather a hard lauch, but not at all hysterical. "I told him I'd lau.i in his face alter he was dead," paid she. "lie wits my husband. He treated me cruelly. I eaid I'd laugh in his face, and I do it now." Sho laughed fipain. She fcemed not nioro than twenty years old. Her blue eyes were cold. Joe l'oarty is uod to scenes of every sort of human weakness, passion and nofrow, but he confessed that this scene Fta cered him. He had never ecen its like before. "My God 1" be exclaimed. "h is dead! Don't you see he is dead? For tods take let by-fones bo by-gones! He is dead!" Dut the girl only lauehcd bitterly. Hie leaned over and peered into the dead face. Then she lauirhed aloud. But this lime it was nervously. "He is dead !'' repeated Fojarty, deeply ; "and he is your hnband!" "Ha!" exclaimed the woman, "I told him I would laugh in his dead fare." The laugh this tiino was almost hysterical. "This would be an awf.il thing to get into the papers," said Fegarty. "I don t care if it jrcts into every paper in tho land!" The girl almost shrieked this. Later on, bcinpr questioned, she said that they had not been married long, but that three times he. had broken up the home, and once, when she w as in a condition mont in need of sympathy and help, he had deserted her. "It was then," she cried, excitedly, "that I told him I would hmgh in his dead face. No, 1 don't want the body. Do with it aa you will." ITomce Goodyear Tf Fhllyvi'le was Imdlv hurt Tuesday evciiinp 'y tallinij trom a fr'ipht car, breaking bus hg an J being otherwise injured. CouHuruntioii Cured. An old physician, retired from practice, having had iiaced iu his hands by an Last lu lia missionary tlie formula uf a simple vegetable remedy for the speedy 11ml permanent cure of (.'oiiRumption, Bronchitis, Catarrh. Asthma und all Throat and Lung afiection, flNo a positive and radical cure for Nervous lability and all ncrroua complaints, after having tested its Wonlerful curative tiowfri in tlioiiRiiiHla of enses, has felt it his duty to make it known to his iu tie rin k fellows. Actuated by this motive and ft desire to relieve human uttcring, I will send, free of chnrce, to all who Usire it, this recipe ia German, French or Kn i h, with full directions for preparing and usin. Sent by mail by addressing, with stamp, niiimnz this paper. YV. A. Koycs, U'J Tower' lilock, ßvchwter, . Y.

M

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lieures of women who cio modern labor-saving devices. TO CTFEft OUR 1 -. sj a r.wi - hkswm i

At Private Sale at Creatly Reduced Fricea

ESTABLISHED iS57. 83 YEARS' BL'SIKESl Manufacturers nf IT'sh Gr.V.e AtkinV Celebrated Silver-tecl Sarswül Iili ai eice lontre. and d more work without thug thar any other miw r.iio.

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FINE SAVVC A SPECIALTY. Matie from the fneft Fdectcl Steel ; lest mcilu-dt TJsed, aad the most skillful workuou cii loyci ia their marnfut'tnrc. REPAIRINC PROMPTLY DONE J expert workripn 'e keep In slock n fv.'J lire rt LfATHER, RUBBER ND COTTON bELT!N3 AND V.ILl S'-TPUEi Write for riec-lLt &ul our lov- niotaiiocs. IN'DIAiVPOLlS, i';D. MEMPHIS. TEN',

wBWARE cf wcRTHLtsslMITATIONa .ASK CR05G15T FOR (rjlCHESTC S EMCLIi.1 D I A M 0 N D RRAN DJake no other Wm LrTTtiirntL.il mi 3 nf i V r O ft PARTICULA Wis LtTTfS Sr SITIKN M

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0Vf TBCM t PI tS HS KAVE lI0 C5 CS CS m tH d. ccrr f os on t.roiT prr.t fattt Fin l r.y. run il to.htrci .Vjnitir. T.lht Sas.urndl' S. Ir: I Uvk. Maroon, Vn ..a fa'u. Y :.r I Jite. ttrt.ic V.'koc .. "klrmm Oua Cu&i MX Job U d na el ::2 m tit lit siS 3 H s a 5 W 0 R BUCCY Tl fb CS!r. L wn SfM. SS. F.r,x Pt -t, hby Crrw;ri. Cü.-:.i!n I cl-v. I ui nuic. Front lonrt, S'nre-frra'.i, Srri ta l'o.rs ik' Mr. l-l. linn l-encrv ia lad rryl ;- J. vh tiui.f for tha UdiM to us u( U-e hus FOR OHE DOLLAR CD Cd es ULI CO Z3 o Ar tou Knz o T'.rt -'. t r: 1 If to. de n't i Out a p..it co-.raia.n ter or Srr.rjrw ncn ;oTeiiir i rMwrfi'trn rrm cam prt.-i t it mi eiiiS ei r .rr,1,4 to b n UUI ST, C(M I. K r; MVI "L r'41"'T and hca torn water ar.J tti. .e. 1-Bt4 tblt arma4 aa4 k niarr. Mrrrnt. I.ir '.jig it ara oar I and a j;S-'.-rd Sr ti. I.- r-'j, ta tmil it ta wrvr i Litis w Ik t ( Oils ar C Tllkt wlik t (OtTS. t.-.T i:iiipt arc tat La't ?t)V ned ta the Trt r-rcrr,ir 'A popu'.er IQ t-.a V-?. ar.d up wi.h tf.? tt:r.i Try Cm branrl ul ruilSI rt.T and too u ere regret iL Iba to U.a wue L. luriwient HOUSE PASFJT 1 COIFS FLQOH FAIKTS5 Paint tliat ttrwti dried bf-med tha t'rley t;jiM. frt, poil job. and then ?rrrf N-t t.nt uii f.r coir iv iLu.tt rmt 4 popuia and SUitaUia ahalai, wwraair ta 47 kar4 a rrk ar aif LL No truuut ha CS es lop.nrr. SSäViOST DRY STiCKT IT DC C3 GRATEITh COMiOin IN'J. EPPS'S COCOA. BREAKFAST. "Br a tbor.mh kn'xlo.lqe of te natural lai hicii povfiu me orK-ia'i'ii of lii. ilun na nntri tluu, und t a ran lul aT j ÜTitioii .1 tii tine pri'i'ir. ties ol wcll-acletted Cocuu, Mr. i lis piuv.ded our reakfa t tat-!'. Uli a tifii'-cu-iy fav..r.-,i t- Viratu which nuty ave in maur ln-avv lM-tor dill. It is by li.o juiiicious u?f ot Mich ann liK : di-l thai a C'tit it titioTt may le gTaoiutiiy 1 ;iiit rr until nrnj etu(iii;li tc lesi-"; v ry t.-n 1- tii-y t fi-fre-e. llundviils .f au' ilr malBiliM are rli-Mtin; i.r. ti 1 n roaay to aii:i k ln-ievT there in weak i iiit. W iua fMait- iDP.i'V a i;tt:d Fli.'i.t l.y k-.'pii!g currln- wi ll ftiitt-l 'ith r 're lN"tl aivl a j rit rly tuuriiln-J fi;:iii"-." f'ivii crvii e tin-'-IU'. Ma.le j-imply with bs.ilitv wttfr or mi". Sld Olilv in I.;i!.-iui.1 tir.M, tv 'iri i, I..l. !"! :h'is: JAMLs ld'l's A. CO., H'oniu-p:iihicC.'f;-t.s l:i.i'iU, I.I'l; JiiJ. CURED Gr SICK HEADACHE. W. I. i:iin urd3, ralmra. .. rttest 'I Imro lri prea t;ffcrer fron. ColivrnaUf Kirtr. I!nl if le. ttllti tiut Iricti many 111 ei I rlu-t, but tT3 n pör 1 T . aW .4aV J m f . It he only one hl gave mo relief. I find thai ono .ttl rtctw Letter than t lirfc ( any ot her ktn't. na.l il not ucalicu or rrlp-" 1 lepantl uj;r coatcU. Io-eMuall. i'ric 0, ' J Ctntü. soi.i i:vi:ijvv.rm:i:i:. OaSce, 44 Hurray Street, Ke .7 York. Ki:w.Ki. CTRAYKÜ OH Mi:Lt:N, MONDAY Nt'JHT. MAV O U, Rt Milt-svill llendi ivt couut, Irdlara, lipht t.i horse lour -i.r ol !. aixUfii l.s;idj n.ti, ta'fd fuce, ver Urtfr t-t, w::h niwpirtftin vt fit bind foot, ctirt'td in m,:: üind 1-c, fitht at-oi.t l nt poLndd. pet kf Uhird. almost lirpo. dip to riüc. rut irratle ulhrr Mays. A i:i.-rl re'.irJ w;!l be j.aM f.n rc-covf-ry of hrr.. or any information thitl uiay lead t4 recovery. Addrraa Kred h.carr. 18 DR. CHASE'S RECEIPT BOOK AND HOUSEHOLD PHYSICIAN. Tt New "JTrtnortal Ediuon" ty tha pratp-t autbnr ana tn-nrfactor th eer ltTd. 869 ppc. Im tn-ne sslos, 8' Trrrs to Aper. i.ii"n thai

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