Indianapolis Sentinel, Volume 34, Number 123, Indianapolis, Marion County, 3 May 1885 — Page 7

THE INDIANAPOLIS DAILY SENTINEL SUNDAY MORNING MAY 3 1885.

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TC3 OLD STYIX AltD THE NET7.

BT OUIOA. , Shall not the children laush IWore they reach th deep de-pond o" lue? r live ff o' povr there's such a ttt: space 1 or pit j time. Wi us childhood orer toon : booii aa wt'rc bcrn, a'lmost. Why aaencn the sjrace jouth atwakta'? Truly 'tia a boon -Omea not afrun. When 1 were yoaur. my boy, e lads ac lasse beslinfal II. and s'.ron. Alike la work an! -port could tied oar joy. 1 the dark, for us no day 11 ion: JKat ye poor --aaiina- never win t- yoant.

i me Diooa a aried op la je like leal la boat: I'rtU tiil all co.'or g gone. (JloMwetn j? . i On winter i 4

day. But a't they tesc h ye now li sreed o peif And envy o' the rlci nun's mean aad war, Instead o iwm co&:?nt. Wr Qarea herself id not ha roanji'd my lot wnea work wa o'er, An eittin' i the torch. I rnell'd theatocks. An toattera-wood a- sirowla' ty tbe door. Bat all ye creatures are drove ou like Hocks panua'. ißaria, bustWd. banlird sheep. And üuster'd. Jntsp lato yer darksoir. pit dUcoutent in' icKaeas Can't ye slep? Oorre dceer r - Up, aad stretch a Dit Yer Hu: lirabi la peace. St. JameVs Budget WIT A Mit FUSJiBANTKT. Woman's sweet disposition 13 always shown io her huibaad's long hair. ' t An exchange fays: "Itoand wa'sta are tili In fashion." We should hope eo. What would become of us if .'tireta to three orneredcr pentagonal waists? A scientist has found th.U a woman's ear can perceive higher notes thaa a rnaa'a. Tüla is the reason why the woman always wakes np fi:st when the taay cries ia the night Phwatdo they want to make Miither Prince a mmiatfaer for?" sa?d one of the Democratic politicians the other day. "I U n't be aye he irer lid a ;praj eraeetin' in his ioife.M Beaton Beacon. Miss Fisher I really don't think I shall take part aain ia theatricals. I always feel as though I were making a fool of mysudf. PlikJrs (wbo always 1 aye the wrong thing) Oh. everybody thinks that Ex. The Texan editor and father who penned the following paragraph must have had a tough time: "If in proportion to size, a man conld holler as loed s a baby, there would be no telephones needed in this country." A Scotch parson said somewhat sarcastic ally of a hard drinxer, that ' ha pat an enemy into his mouth to steal away his brains, but that tie enemy, after a thorough and protracted eearch, returned without aay thing," It is raid that Japanese women do not know the cs9 cf pics. This ouht to causa young mea to emigrate, bat with the usual recklessness of the sex they will go ri?ht oa bearing ectratcbes on their wrUta with mar tyr-lile heroism. Journalut to his wife I feel very bad this morning. I don't tee that It's worth while to go to my work, for my heal acne so nalnfully that 1 can not think. Wife Djn't trr 10 tbink any to day, deir. 8tay at home and Troik on your bcok. Arkansaw Traveler. ( neerier and cheerier rroir the dayr, nl ice storm are fewer and fewer. Warmer etch dy Krow the sau'i ulal rays, An1 ibe kklen grow bluer nl bluer. And tbe wife wita oaly a saawl to her biet Uaa c? 3d her bulla baloo, And erica no more for aneaihiu aacqaa Ana a lui-llaen ciicular lao Caccasian trsmp: "My colored friend, pleae lend m a quarter. I fonght,bled and auffered fenr jeirain tbe Uoion army to xaaka you a free man." Co'oted gentleman: "You did yotirdnty. sah; bat 'baut loaning . you dat quarter, don't keer. sah, to re wive da bitter memories of de wah." Arithmetic, in former day?, sail. "one anJ on a make iwr, But now we hve advanced ao far that will no: Co: taatityle And blushing bride and happy groom, Wh0!6 ioneiy uvea are acne, fay, with tbe pa toa'a full consent, that "one and one make one." Oae of the professors at the University of Texas is one cf the most absent-minded men in the state. Not long since a gentleman, who was only slightly acquaint? with him, asked him: Trofessjr. are you married?" The profrtsor was Absorbed in thought for a few momenta and then replied: "Yes, I think so, if I am not mistaken." Texas Sif tings. Jost as a lover had dropped oa his knees and began popping the question, a pet poodle, who thought the proceedings rather strange, made a dash for him. With remarkable nerve for a woman, the gtrl reashed oyer, seized the dog by the neck, aad, at the same time, calmly uttered: "(Jo on, Georce. . dear, I'm listening to what you are saying." A few days since a welding breakfast wai giyen by a sobatantial farmer blessed with i tive daughters, the eldest being the bride, when a neighbor, a yoan farmer, who was honored with an invitation, thinking, no doubt, he ought to say something smart and coBjplimentary upon the event, addressing the bridegroom, said : "Well, you haye gat the pick of the batch!" The countenances of the four unmarried ones, as may be imagined, were a study. Jinks I tell yoa there is nothing like looking after the pennies. Wny. some mea pay out 100 a year in street-car fares alone. Jest think of it. Minks Well, yoa ride, too, don't you? "No, sir, I don't; I walk. No matter what the wea'.her, 1 walk to and from my place of business every day. S3 you can see how much I save." "But you live a Ions distance oil. Don't you gat tired?" Oh, no; there are plenty of beer caloons to rest ia." Philadelphia Call. A gentleman living at Orinnell, Ia., is in this city to day and relates a story cancarnicgGenerel Ben. Bailer which we have ntvrr tern in print. Ben. was delivering a tpeech at Grinnell in the lat Presidential campaign, when some parties acsnded a tree overlooking the speaker's stand. Wh?n the General becan his address they lowered over bis head a string from which a SD3on dangled. Without showing ths slightest em barrassment, General Batier, as sojn as he saw the dangling tp-on, clutched it and plated it In h-s pocket, remarking, "Why, that's one I dida't get" There Tfer Two Sad Heart. A young man who has or, rather, who hd tremeudiorn affection f jr a certain fair pne whom he fondly hoped to make Mra we will tay Joces was visititg her ths oihsr evening, lonvtreatfon tlei, when presently he asked her if she woald not slag for fclrn. Her aenniescence was viry cheerfal, and she tested herself at the piano and sang with much fte'ing and fervor of expmiioa, WoaM he were here, for my h?art is eai." Then th rnng man remembered he had aoiberyUItto ray snd thoughtfully decatttd, ceyer to leturn. 1 he Hystery Solved. Detro.t Journa!. "Too bad I had to go out to see that ticket Her about tickets for next wees," heremarked to his wife as he settled hi anal f down affer a trip downstairs between ats. ) ice asair quite lipceJ my mind as we cams in. Were you annoyed, my dear?" Oh.ro! I didn't mind It in ths laiat thank vou I was quite busy working out a taental problem." "And what was that love? ' "Why they call the front curtain the -drop." "I tee. Did yoa succeed?" "Yes. I thick I got the correct answer.'' "And that was" "Because so many men go out for a drop V:htn it is down, my dear." CT3LIOIOC3 LrrrcLLiacxcrj ako jzj C1DBMT, Tbe Second Congregational church at Watrrtciy, Ccnn.. hars totfd 1373 toward tha fcsd cf S1.C00 to be rsiaed by the Connecticut CcnrritIonaliata for equipping a nero ctcUtQuit:m, Ga. " r. rl:!Joci-pcfc-ch raiisa field , : - -:zrj tl3r;2i crzii'J-a cf c;:.j: Citlic '-zilLI) b a tli cf

tbe pcislbie coU'ctioss from ths districts, bowleg how 1.000,000 caa ba raised In 18X5. The rectors and prominent laymen connected w;th several of the Protestant Bolasopal Churches Iq New York hare inaugarited a mission work: fashion d after the recent London Mission, which is designed to put the churches in more thorcaga sympathy wiih the working people. A dJsticguished Episcopal clersynun of Boston, in a recent sermon, allndicg to the distinctions maie tn the "li te of 6ilas Lapham" between the people of the 8oath Ead and the Back Bay, said the people who lived cn tho latd that God mad were jnat as gooi a these who lived oa land made by man. The retcrted eajiog of Dr. J. P. Newman, G ceral Grant's pastor: ' Great men caa gain nothing from relig oa, bat religioa can gain ranch from great men," is pronounced untrue by Dr. Newman, and he gives author ity for this statement: "Great mea caa gain r.'Tjrh from religion, bat rehgion caa gain noihirg from ereat men." Senator D W. Voorhees tells an interesting nory of the pardon of the Itsy. Heary M. Luckett, a Methodist minister formerly of Spricgfield, by Presideat Lincoln. The old gentlerxaa had been led by detectives to make overtures to the rebels for the eale of quinine and percussion caps, both of which were contraband of war. The detectives having led him astray, reported him, and he was court-martialed and ordered to bs shot Mr. Lincoln remembered him as an cA Springfield acquaintance as sooa as the mat ter was brought to his attention, and readily i&tntd a prompt pardon. Tb prayer book now In use in the Episcopal Church of America was prepared for use in this, country from the English prayerbcok in 1780 With ihs growth of the chcrch in extent and inflaenca the desire has come for various changes, not ?o ranch, perhaps, in point of matters as in moiifi nations of minor forms cf phraseology. In IScO preparatiors for a revision of the prsyer book were eet in motion, aad Un revised book has now been leaned. Its issuance, however, does not imply its accept pnee, and it may be that it will require yet another revision before a satisfactory result is reached. The new book will now go oat to the various churchmen in the country for consideration, and it is likely that tha mat ter will come up for consideration in the forty eighth annual convention of tha diocece of Chicago, which will be held in Chicago in tbe Cathedral May 2G The editors of the revised edition have been the Rt Bsv. W. C. Djane, Bishop of Albany ; the P.sy. W. Ii. HnnliDßton, of New York, and the Hon. Hamilton Fish, of New York, the latter on behalf of the laity. VARIETIES.

What a man wants All he can get. What a won:aa wants All she can't get The wheat crop of India is estimated to ba floe with a prospect of a full harvest U only c-.sts $2 to dress a family In Porto Ilico for a whole j ear. It is expended mostly in hats. A woman nerer really eels that she has too many thumb nails until she Is tacking down a carpet. "Only a match box," remarked Fo? at tie theatre Ihe other nieht; referring to the ttats where the young lovers sat. A New Jersey woman broke herhabind of the Labte of usiog naughty word by te;iily murmuring "chestnut ' erery ti jiq he A cl?rpyman in Paris, Ky., stopped his pisyer to lead an unruly boy oat by the ear, a iid then went on: "As I was goingjDn to ssy, Oh, Lord." Doctors are more numerous in Vienna than in any other city in Europe. There are ten times as many in proportion to the population as in London. A man dined at a Kansas City restaurant yesterday, and, after finishing his dessert, deliberately shot himself. There are some thirgs too humiliating for human endurance. What la a ship without a sail? Adieu, my love, adieu. What l a monkey without a tall? A dude, my love, a dade East Orezoaian. A Chicago woman scar 3d a burglar away by pointing a hair brush at him. Some men who haye been boys caa never look at a hairbrush or slipper in the hands of a woman without wanting to run. Chicago has a good many sins to answer for, but the gentleman who snatched a contribution box from the kind deacon who was paesing it around for another purpose Is a disgrace even to Chicago. In Patagonia they flee a man two goats for killing his wife. The law is very strict on tie subject, too, and if the fine isn't promDtly paid he is compelled to marry again. That makes him hustle around for the gsat "It's criminal to kisV Said the beautiful ml?. And the youth, with effrontery sublime, Kii?ed the naid and said, "There! If 1'maiaoeed I declare It will be for a capital crime." Boston Courier. A certain distinguished Cincmnatlan says the proper way to kiss a girl is to plant it in the middle of her hand and shut her fingers down on it for safe keeping. It may not be as sweet as the real yum-yum yariety, bat it certainly takes the palm over all the ordinary brands. A writer eays that "Europeans in India rarely suffer from snakes, ths boats protecting their fest, which is the part of the baiy most frequently struck by serpaats." In th e country the b jots would have to come cp ever tbe mouth in order to alFjrd a protection against "enases." Norrlstown Iler aid. An Illinois law student was caught ia the ac of vigorously arguing an imaginary ciss before a taw horse and twelve sticks of cord W! o'l the latter representing the juro's and thefcrmerthe jade. He "allowed" that he cever appealed to a more intelligent lury, nor ever argued before a mora impartial judee. bicre tho downfall ot the last French E npir, M. Brisson'a is the twenty second rrlinistiy which has endeavored to conduct affairs in it at country. Mr. Cleveland i oar twenty recor d President, so that the Frenc'a Ka public bss bad in fourteen and a hilf years th ea roe number of administrations that the Ul lied S:ate3has had in 1C. years. Some people are born cheeky some achieve cteekand some have cheek thrust upoa them, but when it comes to a whole face It is fee rid in tha fellow who will let his girl go to ihe roller-rink alone, pay her own admission and the rental for skates,, and a half hour later he cornea np, skates all the evenicg with her and then takes her home and wants her to kisa him at the gate. First Tocsorial Artist "That man, Tresidei t Cleveland, will make a good many mhtskes. von'llree now." 8?condTonsorial Artist "They lay he's pot plenty ot. horseseme, and that's a good thing to have." 'TI at's all right, but what good does that do a rr an who don't know what's poin on in the world? He can't keep posted. He's got no od e to tell him all that baopens every where." "And why ain't he?" "He shaves himself." Perseverance. I believe dat in mos' cases success am waitin fur de man dat's always rasslin' wiv ear cumstanccs: 'kase I bab ofea notlat dat de dog wat chaws de longest oa de ham bone ginerally gits de marrer. The Figure Nine. Multiply 0 by any other number, and add the particular f guxe in the quotient, aad tke result will be 9, viz: 9 9 o 0 0 9 9 9 9 times times times times times times times tirrts

1 Ü 9, 2 are is. 3 are CT. 4 are 5a. 5 are 45. 6 are M. 7 are 63. Sara 72. 9ct2 n. 13trs tx

1 aad 8 are 9. 2 and 7 are 9. S and 6 are 9. 4 and 5 are 5 and 4 ara 9. 6 and t are c. 7 and 2 are 9. 3 tad l are 9. 9 cad ara 9.

9Ua

THE HÖHT. It la net doubted that men have a boras la that plat wkere emch oae baa eatabliahed hi bearia ana tbe sam of hla possession and fortunes, whence te will not de?art If notäia c.tlli hin away: whence if he baa departed be leemi tob a wanderer, and if be returns be ceases to wander.

- uonaiuon irm civil Law. Then stay at norne, my heart. rest i a Lwru im Mien in ine neat; O'er ail mat flutter their wicrs aad fly, A hawk la hovering la the sky." Loazfallow, YOCNQ FOLKS. Spring Answer. Tell rne. sweet crocus.-I loa? so to kaow, How did It m to yoa nuier tne mow tvere yoa af raid of the dark aa 1 the cold ? llow did yoa anow when to creep from the mold? "Oh f had never a thought of harm! Under my coverlet colt and walte, Foltfel so warmly away from the Harm. All tbe Iouk winter teemed only a niat! Till 1 ielt Low tLe enrth's heart under me b.at. And sprsn? up to the suaihlae, stroaj aad Blue-bird, dear blue-bird, and hare yoa come back? flow could you fly without compass or track? Will yoa not grieve if some days should be drear. Leaving a summer that lasts all the year? ".Bright were the bowera of the orange and lime. Yet dearer my home ia the apple tree now Daily and nightly I dream of the time Wntu my soft fledglings shall rock on the bough. I needed no compass or chart cn ray way, I beard a voice call ise. and could out obey!" Little red 'iu Irrel, hieb up on the tree, Why do ou cuatter and acoldat me? How have the long months fared with you? Shy little EQUlrrel, O tell me true! 'Vtauc; ia a hollow I made my nest. Lined with the softest of haves and moss, Nothing it mattered to break my ret How tbe long branches misht writhe aad tos, But my nuts, and sweeter thaa mine were none! Were all gathered in autumn, one by oae." Say, little brook, why such riot and rout? W hat Is the noiie of your babbling aoout? You can cot surely have stories to tell, that up so lon like a monk la a cell! "Ah! bat the fetters that bound ma are barst, J leite! away in the smile of the stiei Down In the meadow, the spring dowers athirst. Wait lor my comtnj to open their eye. There's a call on the breeza that blows soft from the west. From my mother, the riverI tly to her brea&t. Mary A. F. Ilumphr;. Not Polite. Many things in which young people rsader themselves very Impolits: Loui laughter; xeadlDg when others are talking; cutting finder-calls in company; leaving meeting befoie it is closed; whispering ia meeting;. iteziKg at strangers; leaving a stranger without a seat; a Want of raversnce for superiors; reading aloud in company without being asked; receiving a present without some manifestation ot gratitude; makiog yourself tte topic uf conversation; laughing at the mistakesof others; jokingothers in company; correcting older persons than yourself, especially 3 our parents; to commence talking befoie otheis are through; answering questions w hen put to others. A Large Family. 3. Nicholas. "The yellow Italian bees are gentler thOi the brown wild bees; and it ia said that tbe Italian bee has a longer proboscis, and so can get honey from the red clover, which is eo abundant hereabout I thoaght they were better, for, when I was a very poor man, I bought an Italian queen bee in the big city cf Jfew York, and pid twenty dollars for her, and I haye never yet repentei of my extravagance. I have now sixty-nine hives ol pure Italian bee3, and they are all the descendants of my pretty queen. Allowing foity thousand bees to a swarm, which is a moderate number, it is not a bad showing for her majesty. Let me see. forty thousand by sixty-nine makes well, at least two and a half millions of living descendants, besides dozens of queens I have given away, with all their descendants: these, added to the multitudes that have lived and died In the mean time, must make, all together, not far from two hundred millions in twelve years." lie Isn't Qettlng Wicked Inside, Is He?" "V I ,1 If- 1 . isue ipnuK uay a geuuemau awoae irom a long, heavy sleepy and turning on the sofa where he was stretched, he glanced into an adjoining room. There was a pretty picture, and being an artist, John Clayton could well appreciate it. The afternoon sunshine filled the room with a rare light bringing out the rich colors of the tapestry.the quaint form of old furniture, and the beauties of statuettes, yates, and all kinds of curious and co3tly obiects accumulated there. But the room only framed the picture. In plain view from the sofa where the artiet bad been sleeping were his two children, Claud and Fanny. The boy, who had inherited his father's talent, had supplied himself with paint, palette and brushes. He hsd easily induced his amiable little sister to stand near by his easel where he could gravely study her sweet face and tangled, golden curls. As he studied her thus he tried not quite unsuccessfully to per tray her face and figure on a panel before him. I am doing your dre33 now. Fan," be es claimed, "an a you may talk if you waatto while I work." "Wasn't mamma a beauty when papa painted that picture of her over there?" ' ßhe is a beauty now," replied Claude, "if the doesn't curl her hair and dress in white." "Yes, she is iu3t as good as she can ba; bat sie doesn't Icok as joyful as that pictare. Anyway, Claude, papa isa't so handsome as he was when h's picture was painted, is he?" "No," said Claude, reluctantly. "But papa is happy." continued Fanny, "fcr he laughs so much. Oh! how he did laugh yesterday in here when those gsatlemen came to see him and they made lemonade. Why would not mamma let us come in and have tome?" "it was wine; and I am never going to drink wine, and you must not drink it, eitper." Why not? ' She will tell yGU sometime." Claude, do you know mamma says everybody paints a portrait of himself or her seil?" "Well, some people would make dreadfal work of it," (aid Claude, lightly. "They do, ehe says It is funny talx we bad rne day. She ea!d we were born with faces like blank canvas, and aa we grew onr own thoughts were the little pencils and brut hes that work away, making oar features and onr expressions. If we are pood and kind, the goodness at last came through and stamped itself on our face;. If people griw wicked, they don't stay beautiful a great while" "Weil, sis, I guess you must be pretty good inatde," laughed Claude, "for your nose and mouth are Lot at all wiskel yet, and yourikin is lovely." "Bat that day I told a wrong story, my eye looked muddy, mamma said." "Yes, they did, becacs, you se, you were ashamed to look up and let the light shine In tteru." The listener on the sofa wa3 being entertained by this chatter when Fanny in an awed whisper said: "Papa don't tell wrcng stories, but his eyes get real muddy and he does not look h&nasome at all some day; his face gets very, very red. He isn't getting wicked inside, is he?" "We must not talk that way," stam me red Claude, and John Clayton saw tha sensitive face flush and grew very sober. "Para eayi he is sick those days," he added, gazing earn eatly at his work, but doing nothing. A moment later he came down from his stool, saying 'I won't paint any more today ; let us go aid play in tha garden." When thiir brl-ht faces vanished from the ttudio Jchn Cltytca entered, tnd eroding tha rccra, ctocd rhtra cn caa hand he could

S'ehisown portrait and on the other a mirror. In that mirror, or rather its redacted image, ten years befora he hid piloted tils I inure that his children callel handsotus. To-day the mirror pictare was a suddea revelation. Age hid cot made this change; he wai only twenty-fire in the portrait oaly thirty five in the mirror. As an arttst he loved beauty, and this reflection of rel now, blotched skin and watery eyes, fille.l him withd:sU3t What was the matter? A silvery voice echoed in his ears: "Hs Isn't getting wicked inside is ne?" When Claude came back his Picture had disappeared. Oneday years after, it was given to Fanny by her father, who toll hr of a day she had forgotten the day he pledged himself to drink no more wine. LITTLtt FOLKS.

"Did you look at the sun, yesterday, Freddy?' laid Anna to a little four-year-old callcf, the day after the eclipse. "Yes, and a piece of it was tooked out." Ecene, a Sunday school : Young lady catechizing tbe children oa the plagues of Egypt. Y. L.: "And what bscome ot the plagues of locusta?" A pause. Thea sma'l boy at the bottom suddenly. "Pleae, miss, I know ! John the Bapist ate them." There was unexpected company in the parlor. Edna ran out to tell Ralph of the arrival. "Now, Italph," she said, "you must be very polite: when anybDdy speaks to you, you must ecy yea'm; an when they don't speak to you, you must say, no's'm." Clad 1 u Olory. Mamma (pointing to some unclathe i cherubs) Lizzie, if you are a good girl you will go to heaven andba like those little asgels Lizzie ( who has a 6tnct sense ot propriety) Well. I hope I'll he better dressed than fhev are. He Gave It Away. "Here," yelled a snaall boy who had bsen trading knives, sight unseen, "that ain't fair ' What ain't?" asked the other one. "Why, this knife's backspring is gone aa d'taint got no snap." "Course 'taint; I gave tbe snap away. What'd ye reckin' I was trading for?" A Very Delicate Hint. The editor of a leading humorous paoer, when a little boy, was very fond of gardei ing in a small way. One day when he was watt ring a plot where he had plantel some early seed, his father went out to see what te was doing, andtaid to him, "Johnny, why don't you waler ycur garden with aoapaud?" "It doesn't rain soapsuds from the sky, dosit?' "No; but then it doesn't rain dowers or cabbages, or hats or coats " "I know it; if it did. I would have a new pair of spring troaasra " SOCIAL UOdSIP. Coral jewelry Is coming in again. Love: Tbe toothache of the heart. Long distance makes close frienda. The heart is a magnet, with joy aad sorrow it pcles. A light-headed boy will often make heavy hf arted mother. Jetted bodices are fashionably worn with colored silk -kirts. A man short of religion can not make up ths decency with a long face. All that tread the globe are but a handfal to the tribes that slumber in its bosom. Society ia to blame for the evils it sutlers, became it fails to carry out its own moral cede. . One who is constrained, uneasy and ungraceful, can spoil the happiness of many others. Extremes in dress do not harmonize. A chap with holes in his shoes should not wear a new silk hat. "Bound waists are still fashionable," and the young men will see that the fashion is not changed for want of judicious pressing. Let ts begin our heaven on earth; and, being ourselves tempted, let us be pitiful, and considerate, and generous in judging others. When home is rnled according to God's word, angels might be asked to stay at uight with us, and they would not find themselves out of their element Spurgeon. I hold him great who, for Love's take. Can give with earnest, generous will ; . But he who takes lor Love's sweet rake I think I hold more generous still. Adelaide froctor. How fond the world is of that which is in aDy wise new! Thousands of people will bay the revised Old Testatsment who haven't oper ed the covers of their King James version in years. The newest trimming for hats consists of dried twigs, singly or in bunches, either varnished or gilded, and through which a tiny beetle or some pretty insect appears to ba creeping. Shut the Daor. Don't let the door stand opoa, but shut it with much care, Without a bang, without a whang, yes, shut it fair and square; Without a slam, without a jam, without a damn or jerk. For if you ve left it open, go shut It, aui don't shirk. No Christian manor woman, no well-trained chick or child . Will let a door swiuj Idly, to make weak nerves run wild. When chilly winds are blowing and soma one taking cold While the opea door is creakin; aad mutterin like a scold. Haste makes bat waste, remember, so plenty tale of time: Doa't leave the door half opea a fault aliaot a crime And it you've ever dona this, don't do so aay more; Whatever eis you fill to do, doa't fall to shut the door. Mary MetaoLcil. "Siniait The Ingksie Tbe new slang monosyllable in genteel society is smart," and is taking the place of 'aful," "quite too awful." -a fully ti:e." It is at present used strictly and only in the pesttive decree. We shall probably hear tbij ' smart'' word a good deal among our ' s:t art" youth of both texes daring theco n irg seaion ia Lawn tennfs cour?3. at c uSs, and e'.eewhere. At first sight it doesn't 8?eru bo felicitous as "tn too" or "aufally nica." Wt can imagine Miss McFlitcsy . making a ten-atrike and the chorus of the boys m attendance: "Smart!" No compira'iv ko superlatives, at present, young gentlemen. Ten Good -Thought. There is some help for all the defects of fort tine, for if a man can not attain t) the !tLj.th of his wishes, ha miy have his remedy by cutting cf them shorter. Cowley. They are beppy who? natures sort with their vocations. Lord Bacsn. Wick dre may prosper for a while, bnt a, the long run he that sets all knave at work will pay them L'estrance. Some men are ?o covetous, es if they wer to live forever; and others so urease, as if they weretodlethenext moment AriUol'e. If punishment rfabea not tbe mind aad rxakts tbe will supple, it hardens the cruder. Lc eke. What muat be shall bs; and that which is a necessity to him that struggles is little more than a choice to him that is willing. Seneca. The master is respected according to the discretion and good breeding cf hi3 servants. Cervantes. My heart like the world about me came forth to meet the sunshine, and thawed after its long winter. Jean Ingelow. Love gives insight and Insight often gives forbodic g. George Eilot The perton who has a firm trust in the Supreme Esing is powerful in his power, wise by hijTfiidom, hrppy by hü happiatta. Adln.

GOTH All GOSSIP.

The Tendency of the Age to Ynlgarism and Shaia. The Tarade, Pretence and Power or Parvenaa. Boston Herald New York, April 23, 1355. I know of nothing which more clearly discloses the marvellous social transformation of the times and the universal race for wealth which characterizes the struggling! cf to-day than the endeavor on the part of people ia humble positions in life to ape the conduct and mode of living of what I doa't oüsa lively call their superiors No man recognizes more thoroughly than I that rank is but the guinea's 6tamp, and "a man's a man for a' that," but for a' that there is a great difference between being well born and well bred and lowly born and ill bred; so great a difference that an explanation of it would be absurd to any man of common sense. I believe ia evolution, and America has no greater glory than the fact that the poor can here become rich, the Ignorant learned, the humble of consequence ;that the flat boatman of thirty years ago became, by his own unaided energy and intelligence, a director of affairs, a hundred times a millionaire, a builder of roads, the master ot transportation; that the humble barmaid' of thirty years ego, following and sharing the fOi tunes and progress of her husband, had the pleasure before she died of seeing her daughter lead society's merriest dance, and her sen take his place unchallenged among the princes of finance; that the miserable, drudging pedler of forty yeara ego, by persistent Industry and pensrerence, laid the foundations of an imperial fortune, so that his direct defendants to day are recognized, at heme and abroad, as fit to share the hospitalities of the first to interchange thought with the best informed, and to take part in the advancement and improvement ot their times. These possibilities, these certa'nties, are amcng America's chief glories, but that's not what I mean. In tbe mal, greely tussle for wealth and position the present decade is decade is developing a class of man for whom the gods must hold extremest abhorrence. That this takes hold of the whole structure of society is clearly evidenced by the fast that the record of this week shows the conviction of a bank president, the indlctoieit of a builder, the shameful disclosure of the administrator of an estate, and MALFEASANCE IN OFFICE, -o gross as to render the offenders liable to th gTavest censure of the press aad the most condign punishment known to the civil law. In oiden times what position required a man of atnrdy honesty more absolutely than the .1 midency of a bank? Years of satisfactory repute, a lifetime of unblemished character, honesty on all fours, with conscience. To be a bank president was toaivaleot to universal recognition as a nan of jrjdencs, discretion, comervatisra.ot absolutely unimpeachable integrity, wh word was aa good as his bond, and his bjr d as satisfactory as a law of the universe itself. liun your -mind through the thriving towns of New Eagldhd. Call back from the days of your youth tha main street in the place of your birth, with ita one bank. Remember the president of that bank. How universally hw was traited. How unquestionably his cjnclusioas were accepted as final. How readily Into his custody were given the fands of your pa-eats and your neighbors. I often wonder, when in court, at the extreme deferen ce paid by rxen of brains, intelligence and experience, to the nincompoops who at times tit upon the bench. We have had judges kaowa to be corrupt, judges whose practices in priva'e life were utterly undisclOstaole at any fa uily cucle; judges whose pressnse in one's home would have been coosiderei an affront to the woman who presided therein and to the children who clustered about its board. To-day w have judges upon the bench placed there by reaeon of political complication and for reasons of expediency, who are no more fit tr be there mentally thaa I would be fit to run the finances of the country ; yet in the presence of these men the ablest lawyers in the land, men of irreproachable character, counsellors of discretion and wisdom, bow and scrape and smirk and beg as a Hindoo does before his little god. I have often wondered why this was eo, and I remember omin to this satisfactory conclusion. These eminent lawyers began as clerks. It was their custom to carry papers to the court for signiture. Tl eir study was the law and its practice. What BUMP OF P.RVERENCE they had was developed In recognition of the l ower that exists in the land and finds its exponent upon the bench, and little by lit tie, as tbey grew, this bump grew and ! ?viloped, until, becoming men, thsv find themselves with all the prejudices, with ,a!l the habits and traditions of the ieeal flummery poten with them, and they can't help them selves. That's all. And as it is with the law, so this habit cf thought in resD?ct to the chiefs of finance; grew and prew upoa the people, until everywhere the man wnj ia at the head of a bank was re srrded as expo cent of honor and high toned basinesi morality. How have the mighty fallen! I was in court ore dry this week, when that partlcnlsily infamons econndrel. Fish, president of Ibe Marine Bink, w on tbe staiid. and this train of thaeht occured to me. There sits a man who has been trusted wi'h millions and millions and scores of milli'ins of otter people's property, and h s record eho vs that bis course was that of a swindi-r from first to Jast. His fac shows It Huexprcs eleu shows It His b!iiiog foreheal, lit lit tie pjlg eyes, Ii's concave nr?e, his Uriah Hcepishness cf b-arir.g everything, it seems to rop, aScut h'na woald indicate a man not to be trnned the least of all, a man esnclal!y to b? E&!c'd as president of a bank in the city of N7 York. He was rich, but b wan'el moo, and he sought to dove-fail his orri-ial p ii ticn as pret-itlpnt of a bank in which tbwere millions, with the bastne'S of Grmt X Ward, in which he was a special parur It hes becoro? unfashionable in New "o'k tota)k about the stairs of Grant A: Ward, ard jecple hereabout wonld be vry plvl f tey could chantre tb firm name t. Tih A: Ward, ficmeayail this will bcang?l Sotre t'.ty the facts will he permitted t- ee be l'pht. At pre?e"t f uncifr re iisiit Ire a policy cf reiicrcj, :i"7 alipte by Gran'fa cuordect r, a prlicy which It wonld havw hn well to imitate in the beginning of tha great nmrira troubles, for the teilte 9 an unrcly member and h ve-y apt to in olve t ecple who cm it freely in emrerrararht nd vexatioa oi spirit Without at present c ntertne into n Uscmioa of the Grant part of Grant vt Ward, aad with out seeking to provoke any dis:a-s!on a to what Grant meant by the letters re wrote t various parMes iu reference to cpvemroent ccntiacts. I utilize Mr"Fih aathpreat cccst'icnous illustration of a ba-1 aiai, hol Iireamcst important trust at the hai ot a great institntion, where hs was making mor.ev rapidly eDougb to satisfy any ordinary business concern, but, bein? di.satis fed with the mothods there poslo -ml being deeirous of enhancing hia already tremendous fortune, went deliberately into a fCHEMK OF SWIJTDLIXG wdich brought about the ruin o hnndrsds cf innocent parties and shadowed the great name of cur illustrious general with sorrow snd shame to, say the least Well, what's the end of it? Charged with crime, tried and convicted, he cow rests in prison, fro-n whecce he Is occasionally brousht to testify nprn the stand cf the meanness be practiced while at the bead of the Marine Bank. Is ttere anymore sacred trust in the world than that of an administrator of an estate of a dead friend, or of a dead anybody? How careful men are in the tslection of tz.3nta, how solicitous about the truthfulness, the

honor and tbe pecuniary responsibility they areof execntora and ot administrator!, and how essential it is that the greatest care should be taken by men who except these trust. Well, we have had upon th stasd this week a man of wealth and position, who nnblushincly testified that he depo li ted $50,

UW oi tne innaa ot an estate with this man Fish, ostensibly at 4 per cent. ter annum. which funds Fish, the special partner of Grant & Ward, transferred from the bank to the coffers cf Grant Jfc Ward, allowing this rran tnereior an extra i per cent per month. 24 per cent per annum, aad sometimes as hign as 2$ per cent per annum, for his own individual benefit Now, no man who neeis argument on this point u worth talking to All the argument in the world couldn't pen etrate a cuticle of a conscience so flabby as to require elucidation of tbe contemptible conduct of this man. Nothing is more com mon in the periodicals of tbe uay than jokes about plumbers and plumbers' bills and plumbers diamonds and all that sort of thing. I think you will find that all jokes of that kind have an origin, in fact there must be some thine in the course pursued by the mechanics and tradesmen in this day and generation which leads no to warrants, and makes universally understood a class of jokes like that It is precisely like the mother in-law talk. Ko one will dare eay that the women of the world are transformed into devils the moment their daughters carry. That is silly. But what does this universally accepted and indorsed joke about mothers in-law mean? It must have had a basis; it must exist or it would fall flat You never hear anything said about a father-in-law. Nothing about a brother-in-law is ever brought out on the stage or in the press. So I eay there must be something in the general course pursued by mechanics and tradesmen which makes thia plumber joke universally appreciated. Well now, let us see. Within a week a row of houses, eight I think, to all external appearances first class brownstone houses fell with a ci ash. Investigation shows that the build er has been in the habit of putting np houses all over the city with morter in which there was no sand, and which to all intents and purposes was as useless as so much mud. Just now PUBLIC INDIGNATION Is boiling over this particular man. This conduct of his was not confined to this particular row of buildings. He has put up houses all over the city, but more especially in that part known as the East side, where material development during the past ten years has been something phenomenal and utterly beyond ordinary comprehension. Almost all the houses in that section ara showy on the outside, tall brownstone.handsottely capped, finished inside with hard wood, cut in fancy shape, the üueea Anne style largely prevailing, bat the plumbing is bad, the drainage lnsumcient, the ceilings crack after a few months trial, the walls are so thin that piano playing can be heard from one eed of the block to the other. In other words, it is an era of sham. Builders, carpenters, masons, plumbers are no longer content to do honest werk on the plane of life where they find themselves. They see the universal tendency toward the geal of mammon. They recognizs the potentiality of money. They see how the gilded crest bursts forward in the eocial van, ana they too, absurd as it may stem, emulate the condo ct, ape the airs, and follow aa fast as their legs can carry themthis great procsssion to ward a common Mecca. They live in superb houses, they drive maznlficeat horses, their qulpages are really splendid, they sit in tha f tont seats of the synagogue, their wives and daughters have flaunting plumes an.l eiq site coloring, their diamonoa are quoted iu the marts. Have they tbe solid foundation of common sense, with the delightful permea tion born or a love of literature, of a dstra of self improvement? Oa. not rt a!L Tuey are like the houses they haye buiit, all for the outside, nothing solid, nothing substan tial, what Is the end: Sooner or later the end mnst come to theai, as it has to Fist. the banker, as it will cone to the falsa ad ministrator, as it is fast appro ichtng Baidersies the brgus builder, about whoea neck tne halter of tne iais fast tightening at readv, and, when ie in caught, will be nulled very laut It is ditik-alt in talking to a miied audience, without stepping oa somsbcuv's toes, or traversing the whim, caprice. prejudice or pet thecry of this, that or the ciher. Nevertheless, if a man has aa honeit end in view, which be seeks with dae regard to the proprieties, it seems tome he need never LeMiate to tay precisely what he imans. I want to call attention, if I cm. without bartme the feeling ot aay batchsr or taker cr caLd.estick: maker, to the fact ttat.toifcftb.New lor-city is concerned. at d l un ai tat tue is pretty much the same in ot.e t e as it 1 in another, the possession ci mbUL appears to kindle in the breasts of CCmtiiLli i tOple a irsini: ck d:? rL.vv that spreads a!, ofer the realm of ostenta tion and tteteis ou tb vere cf the ridicu lous to iht eiiteitK.Muent of that vast army of tieda'ci kLuwiJ as tbe world in general. The hai c!tuniet tarnout, judged by the display ot oti xi '1 til er upou the barnees of the IdM- at a the o'uamenthtion of the carrispeo. in ibis city belongs to a bra wer; a ver;. r ice fi;ow, wbo s'aried in life without a rioi'ar m h rnpidly risen the ladde of wealth, neglectful, hoaevtr, of his culture, ai d, in fact, of everything but bin pocket. He i ormcusly r:ch, and now a desire hs seized him and hi family to get into "societj." Wril, we have diseased society" before. There is ro burn thin4 possible, in a ct s:ucpo!i:an pace life this, as society. We are epiit up luto duzeus of circle?. There nre liiery sets by the tot: dene luir atioLal te's by the do.'.u ; fiLaLcial Beu. iTjlf sioualtets and hundia la of coineeiic sei, Mi.i the; e s arjajl iteiy ut one plane Xipjit uxn jeatber ay coi-idr-able i-titLber of p-'-pif. luru.i' iz what caa te called the eoci t " tf w Yortt. So wuea I fear a n au. iU tu v fn-a-;, t -e brewer, talk about fcttttrg it. to tuc;;vf J ir.etanly Icok at him t d vLa. Le n-tana by eo de) , nun I SLd 1k et! s S'jiety a num of oil fT rich i e , i-'. not artth brain estcielh, ret with m .raTia esptcia'ly, bat . toj le It- it at e a 015 0 ay, wbo ahow their bore e Hud tt.fir c trriog-e; wlu ra.k: abrut tteir fictur8 aud their matt houses, wh-j want ttffchow jr.u this, that and the eher, und to taiS cf its c-st ; who have but ooe idea in life, and that Is ut.tttr, glitter It ißn't eo much the so'i'ity and Intrins;c valce of the diamond as it is the glare aad glitte r of the paste W- ha?e batcoers h?re a his e gcrpeousneis of - urel d'.&ooautsnr ythtrs box man fever c ; ased to his f-isid Sceha, wbil the Wttiu:obe she expressly t: ok to tbe old Mormon's court with which to derze snd outshire hn wives aid concui ii.fa .1 ere corgrfj.stfd would pile its Inef.cival tir8 in tbe presence ot the ilki and fctit?'. tL pxec'oos strrt's nnd the jowele. i ntu fr ( tl countries, which :h? wivs r.cd 'hohters cf our butchers and greengrocers ftsttt acd and diplay in evtr possible p-nce cf public gathrii'g. iVjhaDs yon think I woald like to keep 'l.ete peop e where thty belonsj? Well, yea, I ubld. Cate? Oh. not at all. Don't be b.? rd. It they would DUt th-ir wea th to i i d ute, how much better off they'd be, If infie of tfceirheai contd bs etuced a tr tl and their manners could be toned down a Httle, they would be happier, more usefal, note ejrreecb'e and more entitled to re--.ct. As it is. they serve admirably as illustrations cf the tendency of the age vulvar (how. The iledical World reports a case, now under observation, in which the patient's hair, wmch tad become prematurely gray.is slowly rttuming to its orieinai color under the iütenel administration of pbophor zil cad I vertll. TheWordhas previously noed tim' ar restoration under the same treatment The Chinere regard an attack cf enilepsy aa tbe occupancy of a man's body by the fDirit of an animal, usually a pig or sheep. They try to keep such spirit by stnifio tha patient's moutn with grass, for if it leaves before the return ot the man's own noirit which must be accent during the fit tha man will die.

Metal Poison,

I an? a copperraith by trade, and dar In a scries of years ay arms (bein- tare whea at work) Lave allotted a wonderlul mouat ol netai poison. IIa ms a acromions teadsncy irora mj youth, the eraali particles of copper ani braaa would pet Into the sores, and by this roces the poiaoa was conveyed Into my blool till my wtole y stem became Infected. 1 was treatei wiih tho old remedies of xaerccry and Iodide poavium. Salivation followed, my teeth are a:i loose ia my bead, iny dieettlre orgtns Ceran2ed. and 1 baea been helpless in bed lor over a rear with mercurial rhernatisn. l!y joints were all sa? j'.iea. and I lost the nw of my artas aaa legs, aal bcsme Lelplefs as an Infant. i!y sufferings became eo intense that It wat irapoeslble for rae to rest. Toe docton alve l me to co to the city hof piUl lor trtatment. This I could not bear. A friena, who bis rrorcd a frlen 1 Indeed, urged rxe to try wift'i fcpeciSr, t-l'crm--it would cure rre. Other; discourage 1 tne but eecured a few tattle, and have now Uka two dozen bottles. Ine Srst eSect cf tae melVlne was to bring; the poison to the e nrfae. and 1 nroke out all ever in rannm? tores. They iva disappeared, ana my ekln cleared oö. My kDeea. which became ttce their nstiral have resumed their usual sire, and are nupple as or yore. My arms and bands are all right scaia.and can uie them without pin. The entire diseue baa left all parts of the body, save two u'cers ou n-y wri6ts, which are healinz rapidly. I ara weac from long confinement, but 1 have the usof all toy limbs. This medicine is bringin? es cat of the greatest trial of my life, and I can not find words sufficient to express tay appreciation ol it virtues, and the gratitude 1 feel that 1 ever Leant cf it t PET1 X)VS Gs. Jan. 0, 1Ss5, Malarial Poison. The drouth la Southwest Georcia last aprinr dried np the wells, aad we were cAmoeiled to ue water Irora the creek on the plaatatioa. Theresuit was that all were troubled with chills and fever. I carried with ne several bottles of Swift' Specific, and as long as I took it I had perfect health. As oon aa I ceased takln? it I, like tne rest, was afflicted with chills. Wnea I resumed its UFe, I was all rizht again. We have ued it la cur family as an antidote for malaria poison for two or three years, and bave never known it to fail in a single instance. NY, c. Fcelov. Buxater Co., Ga.. Sept. 11. 1S3I. Treatise on Blood and Fkln Disea mailed froa. IIIS SWIJfT bi'ÜClFIC COMPANY. Urawer 3, AUanta, Ja.. INDIANAPOLIS iil wm do ajx znzz cr TTrXTf iAND il&EZ7Lll:'& BLANK BOOKS 10' L'&U Show WorS SsDarlment V.Ti rxa veil zzrzi ::r rrisfrj Posters, Programmes. ' iwms m DGSGEE3. if&pfe d flip. jjUeg71 S 78 West Marks! Street, INDIANAPOLIS, EID. GRATEFUL COMFORTING. PPS' COCOA. BREAKFAST. "Sf a thCTCUgh kaowieoge ot the satcr&l lawt which govern the operations of digestion and nutrition, and by a careful application of the Una propertlee of well-melected Cocoa, Mr. Epp haa provided our breakfast tables with a delicately tavored beverage which may aave us maa7 acavy doetc' bills. It la by the Judicious use of ach articles cf diet that a constitution may bo srrtdually built up until atronj enough toretdft ?ver7 tendency to disease. Uundrla ol subtle maladies are Coiling around us ready to attacc wherever there Is a weak, point V,'e may escape crdts fatal shaft ty keeping oar-elves well far rtSed with Dura blood aad a properly coariihej rrtrne." Civil Borneo Oaiette. Mze flmply with boiling water or xnili. Bolt ily In haU-pohud tins by Urocers, U be: led thusi jABtrs Kl'FS & CO., Ilomoeopatnle Cbeoa. LÄOfE !M LI- -Ol. EN H ' .:" "'fc-cat. rT-rr.-.r. -uur ii;.Tf eMtrr9a.. ll.lr. root aal tr-.:!i. in f.v.' oi:nct wuh.l iu, 4ixlxllua, x Uii':T. Pi- i"i Ä rrat4t M A U A LLN E.-rtii tb Cast. DtraL-M v !f.'x trri t ro . -tieTt.T. Best Boiler Scalo Purgative. TO TEY IT IS TO TJSZ UO OTHZS. J. P. hlllLTUKSA PK 481 Office 21 Thorpe ISlocfc, Individual, County or fcuito rlfht of .manuiao ture for eale. t kk fSrsTTvr.L bftller naea this artlcla Boston's Horsa Cars. He was a New Yorker-for the 5rst time ia Ec4 toe. He had strolled through Tremoat and Wahirsca Etreeta and finally brought up at the East Boeton Terry. There he etool for five minutes or so. looking at the steady streams of bore rare pourin; through a!l the neishtcrtool, aal taea, he -poke: "Well. I ?'ve it np Jiostoa's elected by a hcaTy majority. New York ain't a patch oa It, nor Brooklyn either, on horse carti. Never tsvio many hore cars, nor ao many direat aluds of hi ite cars, runnicjr to so many difTc-reat points of the compass at once, in all my travels. And they all eem to run la circles, too! Ifonsofthea hoald jump oa the track it would blockade the whnie town." "They do Jump the track sorae tinea." taewcrel Mr. BeDmin Iu Hirent, the Metrooliiaa lUiirnad staner, wto froTa Lis pou near by bad liste ned to ti e New York man's eoliloquy: "I shall alwsys remember oae occurrence of that kind my self " Yes? How's that?" asked tha New Yorker, of fertng acinar. "It was this waV," answered Mr. Fargent "Since I have been tbe Urter here a rr raa o:Ythe tracK one Cay and Immediately blocked tha road. 1 rushed to help the men lift it on. and gave my tack a strain that beut meto bed for several months All the time my back was eo lame nd tender I couldn't rest ia thy poalilon. The doc tcrs called it lumbago, and tried to cure it; but tsey couldn't. Any way they didn't," - !ut yoti're here cow, yoa know," tali the Ne Yoratr. kUgpeHiTfly. "Hxactlv, " said etarier Farrtnt. "Eat wait a minute I went ia for piait?8 till I ha 1 tried all litte were In the market aad my dt?aaed mmce roc t in ved sore aa ever. That la. ail the plattere bU' oLe " -What one was that?" Eenioa's Cspciae, which relieve ! ms 10 a few ?ays. atd flnaMy cured me. I doa't understand; hew it did it bat It did." ülad to tear it" eaiö the haw Yorker, enter, ins-a car. Time was up aal ths starter blew his whlsUa,

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