Indianapolis Times, Indianapolis, Marion County, 19 July 1951 — Page 21
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By Ed Sovola
CALAIS; July 19° A swimmer needs a good kick In the trunks to start paddling across the English Channel, Yesterday morning, as I was leaving Rome on the overnight train to Calais, my spirits were high, Training conditions in Rome, although far from ideal, left me. feeling confident. The picture changed snd cleared when I stond on the water's edge. Rome was 50 degrees. warmer than Calais. In Rome the channel was a stretch of water separating England and France. In Calais the channel was a stretch of water separating sanity from insanity. There is no question about my swimming ability. Duriog a my lifetime I have stroked through at least 200 miles of water, all kinds, I've been in swimming pools, water holes, creeks, lakes, rivers, Miami Beach, drainage ditches and Santa Monica Beach. In my junior year of high school I swam 100 yards without stepping. ERE THE THING to do is go back on the beach and get it over with. I can’t swim the English Channel in this hotel room. It's now or never, since 1 don't have all summer to make up ry mind. * Gad that water is cold. T stuck my hand into the water an¢ I've heen shaking ever since. What the reaction would have been had I poked my tootsies in, I'm afraid to say.
= a
Another thing, you can't see the white cliffs
of Dover. There's a heavy mist on the Channel and the waves are from three to four feet high. It would be against the wind all the way. The grim picture of shattered buildings and cracked shore batteries shakes the cockiness in your soul. So I sit here in this miserable room wondering what the rewards would be. Besides pneumonia, what would I get? Would it be worth a paragraph in a newspaper in New York? Hamtramck? Joplin, Mo? v ow oo WHAT if T climbed out of the water and there wasn't a witness on the Dover side? In that case I might just as well take the Channel steamer and that, by the way, is something to think about. ’ When you consider this Channel swimming business a moment, you wonder how silly a human being can_get. He has no fins and vet he tries to duplicate a fish. Twenty miles of treacherous water isn't for pollywogs.
Africana By Robert C. Ruark
GRUMMETTI CAMP, Tanganyika, July 19 It has occurred that possibly you might be interested in what it takes, in addition to money In somewhat frightening amounts, to make a safari. For openers you've got to be slightly nuts to travel this far away from home and mother to shoot something that might . ny conceivably resent you to the . point of chewing, kicking, or
goring you to death. But we assume ‘I'm nuts, because I'm here. The equipment is slightly
staggering, because you must provide all you need to subsist comfortably hundreds of miles
away from anything larger than a thatched but. And if you are shooting,
guns or cameras—and we are indulging in both vices—there are so many varieties of targets that you need highly diverse stuff.
2. » :, 'e oe oe ”
GUNS, SAY! I'm wearing an arsenal composed of a 470-Westley-Richards double-barreled (rifle, for such truck as rhino and buffalo, which take a lot of kiNing. It knocks me about as far *ag it knocks the victim, and shoots a cartridge as big as a banana. x Then there's a 375-Magnum - Winchester for lion and the big, 1000-pound-plus antelope-like eland, and for slightly less massive critters like kudu and sable and roan, which are still as big as small horses. The middle gun is a 30.06-Remington for general utility shooting, and a Winchester 220-Swift for potting hyenas and smaller game and finishing off the big babies. All these guns save the heavy double have scopes.
AS THE BIRDSHOOTER in this IT am packing two shotglins, a Churchill 12-gauge double which is my heart's delight, and a marvelous little Sauer-16 which I stole from a friend of mine, after four years of conniving. As vice president in charge of cameras, Mama goes forth to war wearing a bristling array composed of a Leica with telephoto, a Rolleiflex full of color, a black-and-white Ikoflex, a magazine-
It Hap By Earl Wilson
NEW YORK, July 19 Fwell, while personal-appearing at on B'way, had a big temptation. A fellow sent word over that he was coming mn to see the show and bringing his wife. Tom, who spent 41; years in uniform, was dared by a friend to say: “And now, foks, I want you to meet a fellow who served with me in the South Pacific “Gen. MacArthur!” Ewell didn’t. think it was quite respectful and introduced the General straight, The General rose and, as the
Movie Actor Tom the Capitol
audience mostly rose, too, said: “Fighting generals achieve
their fame bv the fighting soldiers under them like the gen-
tleman on stage.” Afterward Ewell zaid, wearily, “I never thought I'd get to meet Gen. MacArthur, Tom Ewell and especially. never thought I'd meet him in a dirty seersucker suit.” “» 45 4
THE LONDON OPINION just came in, with a couple of summer thoughts: “Formula for a successful holiday: Take half the number of clothes you reckoned on, and twice the money you saved.” :
And: “wa philosopher is one who realizes that his creditors are even more worried than he is” Romo Vincent, comedianing at the Copacahana, says, “Marriage is a 3-ring circus: First the engagement ring, then the wedding ring, then the sfle-ting.,
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¢ » GENTLEMAN GEORGIE SOLOTAIRE, the international wit, leaving Polyclinic after a successful operation, said he'd been thinking abotit beautiful Hollywood and decided, “Hollywood is well laid out, and it should be.” Some of the terrible cooling systems around remind us of Jack E. (B'way Open House) Leonard, who on hot nights tells his audiences: “I like the air conditioning here. It must come through a hot water bottle.” : Later he wipes perspiration and says: “I wonder if somebody won't throw another log on the cooling system?” Current B'way observation: “Poor Billy Rose ran out of horseshoes.” ¢* % 9»
. THEY SAY that when Frank Sinatra was watching Ava Gardner and Clark Gable do a love scene in their new picture, Clark called over to Frankie. “Any suggestions?” rd y, “Yes!” said Frank. “Limit it to one take!” " Delora Buenn, the pretty Versailles chantootte. d Dorothy Parker this way: “Men ays make passes at girls who drain glasses.”
Be, ie in
Outside Indianapolis
pened Last Night
" Talks Wimsell Out Of Swimming Channel
What if at the 10-mile mark I got a cramp in my leg? And the left leg has been feeling peculiar the last few days, It must be the damp
atmosphere in Calais because my right shoulders |
is beginning to ache. I think my stomach is
slightly upset, my eyes, That's a strange condition for me to be in, Right up to ‘the time I looked across the Channel, 1 thought 1 felt strong enough to take on Sugar Ray: Robinson. Now I feel the need of a competent physician,
> ¢
I HAVEN'T inquired yet about renting a hoat
and getting the services of a good oarsman. That in itself will be a time-consuming chore. Finding
a boat and a good oarsman who spoke Epglish would be tougher. Probably would take days. Once we were squared away with the boat, the next problem would be food and drink. France is a great country for wines and brandles, but would Calais have Just the kind of brandy 1 needed? Sampling activities would take three days at least. I've overlooked the most important consideration. Before I left the States, I forgot to mention to my mother that I intended to swim the Channel. I feel that she should give her approval. After all, I'm her youngest boy.
* +o
The logical course would be to cable. is, if in Calais they have the facilities, Everything is badly torn up and I don’t remember many electrical installations. At this time of the year my mother probably isn't home. And if she, were home a cable from overseas would frighten her half to death. I better not risk it. The man at the travel bureau in Rome sold me a through ticket to London which included the steamer ticket. He nad it in booklet form before I could stop him. I'd lose the dough by swimming the Channel. Tan’t be wasteful. I could be packed in 100 minutes and on the dock in five. In three hours my elbows could be resting on stout timber in London. In the morning a train would take me to Braintree where I'm going to look around a deserted American air-
field. Have to be there. To heck with the ‘Channel. I know I can do it and that's all that matters. Wait for me, Captain. Hmmm--the zhoulder feels better already v
Equipment for Salari Slightly Staggering
load Cinekodak for movies, and enough assorted film to keep the Ansco people in the black for the next 10 years. > > >» THERE ALSO is a little weapon called a Land Polaroid, which takes the instantaneous shots, and which the natives find infinitely fascinating. The old lady runs a- free photographic studio wherever she goes, and has made more friends than a politician on election eve.
Other people may deal in trinkets: we whip out the Polaroid and’ deliver ‘unto the chief a personal photo, served crisp and hot in one minute. This is witchcraft of a high order. We have one bag full of hooks which we don't read, and two bags full of unfinished work which I don’t finish. We have a bag full of medicine for father's gout, triple sulfa for lion wounds, sleeping pills for unruly airplanes, $20 pills that cure everything from claustrophobia to kleptomania, aspirin, vitamins, quinine, conjunctivitis remedies, and a couple of quarts of insect repellant that arouses the beast in the meekest mosquito. oe oe oe *
WE HAVE a typewriter and a portable phono- |
graph which does not work because there igs no electricity but which a kind friend gave us at LaGuardia Airport as a going-away present. We have a safari trunk full of hunting clothes and a city trunk full of city clothes. We wear bushjackets with cartridge loops and slacks and sweaters and sneakers and boots, We have wooden boxes full of food, condiments, gin, beer, Coke, cigarets and ammunition. There are drums of gasoline and water. There are complete kits of spare parts for Jessica the jeep and Annie Lorry ‘he truck. There is the medical kit for Jessica and the lunch kit for the long hauls. We employ one white hunter, one head hoy, two gunbearers, one lion expert, one carboy, two skinnere, one cook, one cook’s assistant, one lorry
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The Indianapolis Times
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THURSDAY, JULY 19, 1951
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driver to keep Annie stuck in the bogs, two port- |
ers and two personal boys. I tell you, the going price of lions comes high. If we don’t find gold on this trip I may be taking another safari soon. Only this time I'll be working my way home.
Actor Dodges a Gag In Introducing Doug
QUICKIES: “A dimple is a pock mark with a press agent”—Dolores Gray; “He's the kind of a guy for whom Sunday is a big day because he can wear his shirt outside of his pants”’—Horace McMahon. LA o* “TOMORROW'S MY husband's birthday and I want to give him a big surprise,” a Hollywood actress said to a friend, according to our eavesdropper Seaman Jacobs.
“Why,” said the friend, ‘don’t you tell him your real age?” “ow THE MIDNIGHT EARL ... Ethel Me. an's
about set to make a movie in Hollywood, “Ca.. Me Madame,” 1952. Ridge Bond, the Tulsa boy playing “Curly” in “Oklahoma,” is No. 1 candidate to play the Russell Nype part in “Madam” when Nype goes to Hollywood. Milton Berle's behavior in the Rillv Rose-lnvre Mathews situation is much admired by B'wavites, Uncle Miltie emerges az sympathy-deserving. . . . Incidentally, Joyce can have 3 weeks on Jack Barry’s “Theatre of Romance’ TV show if she wants to work, and other B'wayites are rallying to her, also! de Ba
" "
WISH I'D SAID THAT: “A B'way friend is a guy who's always around when he needs you.’ Timmie Rogers. : * oD . ALL OVER: Beautiful model I.ee Carter admitted at Quo Vadis that the Earl of Dalkeith, cousin of the King of England and one-time suitor of Princess Margaret Rose, had invited her to ingland to visit him at one of his three castles,
of course, for 20th Century-Fox, ing
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. + + Joan Diener should have no trouble getting |
work when ‘Season in the Sun” closes. aa B'WAY BULLETINS: B'way sages believe Gen, MacArthur's acceptance of the baseball commissionership would hinge on a long-term deal. + + +» Willlam Gargan's recently inducted son will * get a medical discharge because of his back. . . .
‘Leora Dana, of the late "The Happy Time,’ is
flying ‘to the Coast to meet Kurt Kasner and possibly marry him. , . . Phil Regan's to go TV, + « « Bill Miller didn’t pick up the option he had for Billy Daniels’ services at the, Riviera during late summer. . . , Kay Starr and Vic Shoen were a midnitem at Hutton’s Eigen b'cast. . . . Copnie's takes on Philly disc-jockey Cal Ross. . . . Jerry Lewis retired his discoverer and long-time aide, Irving Kay, with a lifetime salary. . . Billy Eckstine's wowing Atlantic City with a canaryyellow Jaguar convertible,
A
> + 9 EARL’'S PEARLS . . . Rosalind Courtwright notes that actors who used to lay off in front of the Palace . . . now lay off in front of their television sets, 5 Peter Donald guesses Washington wants to
censor television so that ‘Faye Emerson and Dagmar will be complaining, “Long time no V." r++ That's Earl, brother, fs
Spots are floating in front of ‘Rein’s Raiders'—
Inance
PRISONERS TAKER Aggressor force teaches war lessons. .
AMP ATTERBURY, July 19—The 309th Finance Dis- - ‘bursing Section, one of the smallest units stationed here, is playing an important role in the lives of thousands of Camp Atterbury soldiers. x
Besides its mission of paying the troops, the *financemen ‘are | making a valuable conrtbution
to Camp Atterburyv's intensive training program. Known as “Rein’s Raiders.’
members of the 309th take the in eombat training operations during their
part of the enemy off-duty hours. Few trainees realize the men wearing green “Aggressor” uni-
forms with Roman-type helmets work behind a desk during the
day. They swear they're crack infantrymen. ; Capt. Niles J.° McIntyre, Camp Atterbury’s assistant
training officer and a veteran of eight months of combat in Korea, has high praise for the 309th and the work it is doing.
on rr n THE REMARKABLE succes of a handful of men--the 309th
‘This Is the Poor
Justice
By IRVING LEIBOWITZ
AY old man, reeking from booze, staggered up to the judge's bench and pleaded, al most incoherently: “Jedge, send me to jail. Put me on the farm for a coupia weeks." The sticky, sweltering court room on top the police station was the stage on which this one of hundreds of chronic eit) drunks was playing. for the moment, the leading rnle in the tragic routine courtroom drama repeated hour after nour ever: weekday.
This is “the poo~ people's court''—sn named by the pre siding judge, Joseph Martin Howard. The hapless drunk, without
funds, wanted someplace to go where he could get three “squares” a day and a place to
lay his weary, woozy. whiskyfilled head. u w un HE IS A SEGMENT of the “mass of broken humanity” which faces Judge Howarc daily. “We rarely get a rich man in here,” Judge Howard says
“The rich man has his skid row in Ris social room or his club The poor man's skid row is along East and West Washington Streets and South Illinois,
along the beat of the police-
man.” Justice works fast in the poor people’s court. And the drunks and prostitutes parade past the judge in rapid-fire order--more than 15,000 a year, Says Judge Howard: “They get as much justice as we have time to give them which isn’t much. We have too many cases to devote a whole lot of time to each defendant.”
an. AND THE JUDGE is the
first to admit that the poor people get a “bum deal” eomto a wealthy defendant. “A rich law violator has: the
by
has only 26 enlisted men and three officers—in Camp Atter. bury's training exercises {a credited to Maj. C. E. Rein, the unit's commanding officer, Rein's Raiders use Communist guerrilla warfars methods in their surprise attack on com panies of men undergoing train-
ing tests, Most raiding parties are made up of from 35 to 10 men. Once, five members of the 309th captured an entire company of 172 men during daylight. on oy 5 THE NO. 1 MISSION of Rein's Raiders is to test its opponents’ security, that is the
protection it offers against an enemy entering its camp “We represent the type of enemy most service companies
Man's Court’ —
For ‘Broken Down’ Humanity
finances to employ competent
counsel and can take advantage of all technicalities in the law. The poor guy takes what he gets” he explains. It seems, says Judge Howard, that the rich and fight as much as the poor folks but they usually manage to solve their problems at home All the poor people know how to do ig eall a cop.” ” ” » DOMESTIC held once ga week in
folks ‘fuss
relationz“ dav Is
the
poor
U'. A. Army photos
CAPTURED — Finance soldiers play Infantry role as enemy.
BRIEF BRIEFING—Capt. Niles J. Mcintyre (center) briefs Maj. .C. E. Rein (left) and Sat. Blattau.
in rear areas will meet in war-
time,” Maj. Rein said. "Their svstem of guarding tne. camp must be good-—or else. This
lesson was learned very vividly in Korea where Communist
guerrillas often were 100 miles behind the so-called front lines.” The 309th, a Reserve unit from Baltimore, Md. is an ideal unit to employ inc thcse tests because most of its members are combat veterans of World
War Il. Several of the veterans
people's court. It's a sad sight
The mentally ill who can’t af-
ford to go to-a private sanitarium are confined to the county jail with sex perverts
and persons charged with mur der, Go into the hot court on any weekday and this i= what are likely to gee and hear, A 68-year-old grey haired and stooped. shuffles up to the judge and canditily ad mits:
and humid vou
woman
Gls Take ‘Combat’ Role
fought guerrilla-type war ers usually run into stiff resistagainst the Japanesc in the ance on a return engagement South Pacific. “But we always are pleased Ro» » when that happens,” Maj. Rein THE RAIDERS may strike Said. "It shows that we taught before a company has a chance them a few tricks on the first to set up a camp. ‘Often they attack.” ambush convoys, splitting them The comment heard most
up and putting trucks and jeeps
“out of action” with grenades made of flour, If a company makes a bad showing against the Raiders, they will meet them later after a retraining phase. The Raid-
“GGot - a little bit too much to drink, judge I just fell down.” She's an old timer in court but the judge is lenient and
lets her go.
” u ” A HUSKY. dark com plexioned man with no record explains I hit annther feller, hut the
nother guy pulled a knife on me first.’ There iz doubt in the judge's
often after Rein’s Raiders have left a bivouac area goes something like this “I'll never make that mistake again.” That's
too
what the Army hopes,
mind so he places the defendant on probation Inevitably, before the day is over, one of the characters from “bum’s row” on 8S. Illinois St, comes up with an alibi.
I wasn't drinking that day vour honor It was the day before." This defendant has a drinksing record that totals 85 ar. rests It's Aa Iot but not anvs where near the record set by a character police call ‘Inhn Ford.” He has 1826 drinking arrests ” » a AFTER viewing for more than five vears the parade of
drunks, forgers, prostitutes and sex perverts Judge Howard be- \ lieves they fall into certain patterns. For instance, he believes that chronic thieves always lié, and drunks never lie, He explained that this wag a generality and did not apply to all cases, Court records, he said, show that there is some twist in the mind of the average law violator who repeats. For example, the sex pervert doesn’t nsually steal or rob, And the forger usually sticks to forging. 4 » n HE RECALLED the case of a 27-year-old man who was sentenced to serve one year for forging a check on a lecal de - partment store. The day he came out of jail, the judge said, he went to the same department store and forged an=other check for the same amount as the first. He was picked up immediately. This time, however, he was given a mental exam and was come mitted to a mental hospital. “Something happened to these ‘people: somewhere along the. line,” Judge Howard said, “and ; {His isthe. result.” : LE He added: ; : ; “All a judge can do down here is to be kind to those poo®
we PeOD ” ” : ,