Indianapolis Times, Indianapolis, Marion County, 11 February 1951 — Page 26

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Women's Section Three

he Indianapolis Times

SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 11, 1951

—————— mens, —————— re A eb

Times Photo by Lloyd Walton.

SHIRL! SWARTZ « « + chooses wedding invitations.

. Tea Honors

Miss Brown

Service Men's Center Opens

By KATY ATKINS HE SERVICE MEN'S CENTER is’ having

official opening for the men this week-end, though it has been open for business in the new building since the day it moved . . . because service is more important than the perfect angle of a piece of furniture. Dropping by one day I found Mrs. William J. Young and Mrs. Charles Weiss working in the library which was given by the National Society of the Colonial Dames of America in the State of Indiana. Helen Stevenson, Evy Cadick, Helen Green and Marie Wemmer were standing by for the furniture en route in trucks from the World War Memorial and other places. A lot of work has gone into the center and the heartfelt gratitude of the community fs due the Public Service Co. of Indiana for making the splendid building available.

Bridal Tea

WEEK AGO yesterday, Mrs. Julia Lilly

Darlington gave a tea in her Golden Hill home for her prospective daughter-in-law, Martha Brown. An exquisite lace cloth -and white flowers in the dining room gave a bridal air to the party. Spring flowers throughout the house were lovely.

Not long ago Mrs. Darlington entertained her duplicate club whose. members had a shower for Martha, It is a long-standing custom of this group to honor daughters, nieces and daughters-in-law. They are great rhymesters, these women. Presents are almost always accompanied by verses which have been saved in a book and provide much pleasure as the years Bo DB = §ifice Martha was the first girl to be both niece and daughter-to-be, Peg Coppock produced two poems, one for her in each capacity. Incidentally, she included some statistics on the second generation. Peg has five grandchildren which gives a clue to the coming third generation. This group has been meeting twice a month for many years and has close ties. The members very often go off together for a house party at a state park or to someone's summer cottage in spring and fall. They are, in addition to Mrs. Coppock and Mrs. Dar-

lington, the latter's sister, Mrs. Paul Fisher; Mrs. Jesse Fletcher, Mrs. Anna Marie Sayles, Mrs. Alfred W. Noling, Mrs. Ralston Jones, Hrs. Mitchell Crist, Mrs. Fred Heslar . and Mrs. Harold Tharp.

With 10 members, they can usually count on eight for two tables of duplicate bridge. Occasionally, because of

{Continued on Page 29 Col. 6)

. with Margaret Blair

Guide for Brides: No. |

Bride Sets Financial Pace

For Her Wedding Day

By MARY BROOKS, Times Special Writer

THE BRIDE-TO-BE, who dreamily murmurs,

“I want a

church. wedding with all the trimmings,” seldom knows whereof

she speaks.

She hasn't given a practical thought to the “trimmings” (formal clothes for everyone else concerned and all the other

traditional “musts”). Nor has she fully considered the cost of entertaining the all-inclusive list of guests (in small communities often totaling 300) that “must” be invited. All because she dreams of herself floating mystically down a church aisle, a lot of near and dear relatives will have to dig into their pockets

=

or bank accounts. Also pity the bewildered bridegroom who is often led into thinking the initial cost is just as bad as the upkeep—a defeatist attitude you won't want to encourage right off the bat,

S80 before you leap, look the whole situation over carefully.

Formality Varies There are varying degrees of formality. And you, the bride, set the financial pace for the occasion by your choice of costume plus the extent of your wedding invitation list. Remember that the less formal the wedding gown is, the smaller the guest list may. be. For this papa is quite likely to bless you forever. Also the bridegroom and his friends (ushers, father, best man, etc.) will be secretly grateful if they don’t have to beg, borrow or steal -cutaways, full dress suits, etc, with all attendant paraphernalia. Make the occasion as painless as possible, Less formal pomp needn't rob you of your opportunity to be a picture bride.

Consider Living Scale

If your family scale of living is simple, let your wedding also be on that scale. The bride who is marrying

Need Seen For Expansion Of Marriage Counseling

“A STITCH in time” is as important to a distintegrating marriage as it is to a garment coming apart at the seams. And marriage counseling. is becoming more and more the vital stitch in time, according to Henry Graham, general secretary of the Family Service Association at 1003 N. Meridian St. In this respect he agrees Johnstone whose six articles on marital problems, “How "to Live . ‘With Yourself,” apr

peared in The Times this past week. “More marriage counseling service is needed,” Mr. Graham says.

fashion-pluss,.

» into a more well-to-do family than her own should be particularly careful to stay within her means. Financial aid should never be accepted from the bridegroom or his family. Under most circumstances the semi-formal wedding has become the most popular. This means a shorter wedding dress with a short or no train, and a short (fingertip) wedding veil.

Daytime Weddings If the wedding is in the daytime, men (including guests) may wear dark or oxford gray business suits (instead of cutaways, with striped trousers) and four-in-hand ties, In the summer they may wear Palm Beach suits, or dark blue or gray jackets with light flannel trousers, Dinner jackets (tuxedos) are worn instead of white ties and tailcoats, for the semiformal evening wedding after six. With women’s evening fashions so variable in length, guests may come in dressy after-5 gowns aor dinner gowns of almost any length and decolletage. The semi-formal wedding thus solves everyone's fashion problems the easiest way, leaving you, “The Bride,” with as many trimmings as you want.

Questions, Please J. L. IS a teacher. “I sponsor a girls’ club of 35. Must I send separate invitations to each? How is the invitation to the minister's wife addressed ?”—J. L. It is more correct to send an invitation to each member of a group, such as your girls’ club. However, under the circumstances one—read aloud at a meeting—for all, might be considered acceptable. The minister's wife receives an invitation addressed to her, since her husband does not require one, naturally.

TOMORROW: Simple.”

“Keep It

“Along with expansion of counseling facilities,” he adds, “we need something else, too + + » the early referral of situ-

ations before marital conflict gets so solidified we can be of little help.”

Inseparable Problems

HIS AGENCY, supported largely by the Community Chest, is a leading source of such counseling. Started 115

years ago as a relief agency,

it has shifted emphasis dulring the years to family relationship problems. These include both parentchild and husband-wife prob-

Society. .28, 30 Clubs. ..vsv 3% Fashion. .... 29 Food sevens 39 Gardening... 34 Teens ...... 38

June Marriage Ceremony ‘Starts’ In February

By LOUISE FLETCHER, Times Woman's Editor

A MARRIAGE CEREMONY may be read within the

short space of 20 minutes . . . but months of prep-

aration often precede those brief minutes.

Even though June is four months away from February's ‘low-spirited thermometers, already June brides-to-be are knee-

deep in wedding plans.

One of those June brides-to-be is Shirli Swartz, daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Leonard L. Swartz, 4142 N. Meridian St. Her engagement to Frank B. Throop, son of Mrs. Frank A. Throop,

57 E. Maple Road, was announced Dec. 23 at an open house .and eggnog party given by her parents. Back last Monday from an apartment-hunting junket to New York City, Shiri and

" her mother began eyeing the

Jong list of things to do before the Big Day arrives. ‘ On that day, before mid-

June, Shirli will exchange vows in St. Paul's Episcopal Church. The New York apart-

ment will be their home next

year while Frank completes his Cornell Medical School training. Shirli herself, now attending Butler University, plans to finish work for her college degree in New York . «perhaps at Barnard.

The First Step

IKE MOST briaes-to-be

plunging into the business of organizing a wedding, Shirli’s first stop was with a bridal consultant ,

Bride-to-be, bridal gowns and Mrs. Patti Fitzpatrick, bridal

consultant.

Robert Hull explains bridegroom's wardrobe

service,

lems. Frequently, he says, the two are inseparable. ‘Half the problems with children are tied up with marriage conflict.” “Our average marriage counseling case comes to us after five and a half years of family battling . .. We know, by actual test, that the earlier we get a situation, tHe more we can aid in helping a couple get along.” > Many persons are unaware

that such a service is available. But the FSA has 17 professional social workers to help its clients. While aout half the clients gome of their

own volition, a good 50 per cent are referred by other social agencies, doctors, clergymen, lawyers and others.

Group Counseling COUNSELING fees range from 50 cents to $5 an interview. (These fees, plus-a small endowment and some individual contributions, are the association’s only income aside from the Community Chest support.) . In addition to individual counseling, the association does group counseling’ in “family life education” courses. To date this has been for

°

in her case, Mrs, Patti Fitzpatrick of Ayres’, There she and her mother outlined the type and size of ceremony Shirli wants, while Mrs. Fitzpatrick jotted down details on a huge record card. It has to be huge because ultimately it contains descriptions not only of bridal and attendants’ gowns and accessories but also those af the couple’s mothers and the going-away costume, Then came inspection of bridal gown styles. (For that, bride-to-be and bridal consultant really ‘‘get their feet on the ground.” Both kick off their pumps to walk about on the sheet-swathed floor where frothy clouds of tulle and satin are displayed.) That, Shirli discovered, is only the beginning. But she also found that a modern store offers many services to smooth the steps to the altar, There's the matter of a visit to the engraving department to choose invitations, announcements and cards . . « and stationery carrying the new name.

7

Par

Next stop is likely to be the Bridal Gift Service bureau where the engaged girl registers her preferences in wedding gifts. This includes choice of patterns in silver, crystal and china, colors in household linens, perhaps even preferences in furniture styles. (At Ayres’ there is also a home furnishings consultant to help with interior decoration problems.)

For Bridegrooms T THIS stage, the bride-to-be can make umpteen excursions into

the departments handling

items for the new household. She pores over display cases and gives price-tags the onceover,

Sometimes she is amazed at the variety of services a store offers .. , all the way from providing wedding cakes for the reception?to setting up a new Charga-Plate for the about-to-be-married couple. One of the advice bureaus came as a complete surprise to Shirli. It's the Bridegroom's Wardrobe Service in the menswear department,

There the future bridegroom

—— With A Long List Of Plans That Must Be Made

may obtain pamphlets on bax gic bridal home furnishings as well as basic men's wardrobe needs . . . plus advice on what he should wear for any type of wedding ceremony.

Down the Aisle GQOMEWHERE along the

route come the prob lems of arranging for the church, the minister, the florist, the reception. Letters must go out asking friends to serve as bridal at~ tendants, Gifts for attendants

must be ordered. There may: be new luggage to buy along with the trousseau. here's even the matter of kitchen, pantry and household supplies to consider. And, of course, there are the wedding rings to choose + + + rings plural since Shiri will have a double-ring cere~ monye There are scores of things to be done before the wedding march sounds. No wonder Shirli is a little breathless as she says, “I don't see how ANYONE could plan a wed~ ding in less than three or four

months.” a

Shirli and her mother, Mrs. Leonard L. Swartz, plan the marriage ceremony, with Mrs, Fits

patrick taking notes.

Furniture? . . . Shirli cherishes an admiration for the French

provincial style.

already established $roups such as PTA's. Until about 18 months ago, Mr. Graham says, the classes were ‘one - night stands.” George Thorman, joining the association staff then, helped

set up the present family life

" education program. Through

this the association provides leadership for groups interested in several-session courses—the groups paying whatever fees they can. Some local churches, maternal health and community

centers also have offered marriage and familv relations courses. Howe} and

Technical High Schools have

.

marriage preparation courses, Mr. Graham says, as has

Butler University.

‘Strong Nation’ A COURSE on effective living given at Jordan College by Gene Chenoweth includes sessions on marriage. Local clergymen also do some in-

dividual counseling in the course of their work, Mr. yraham reports. And, of course, psychiatrists (16 of them in the Indianapolis area) do much individual

counseling. More is needed, Mr. Graham insists. He cites an 85

per cent increase, durifg the

What crystal pattern goes and china?

And For Early Discussion Of Marital Problems

with my silver

past three years, in applications received by his agency. Half of those were for mare riage counseling. One reason for the Increase, he points out, is an increase nationally in concern with family relationships. “Publication of articles like those by Mrs. Johnstone indicate growing concern about marriage problems,” .he de clares,

“People are realizing that marriage prohlems can be helped. ..and that the stronger families ‘are, the stronger the nation is."—4By

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