Indianapolis Times, Indianapolis, Marion County, 3 December 1950 — Page 13

DEC. 3, 1950 |

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To Local Marriage

Sex problems, scoring

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Counseling Service -

By OPAL CROCKET SEX DIFFICULTIES, not in-laws, are the major fr-

1 ritant in Indianapolis marriages.

79 per cent, topped the list

i of conflicts mentioned by the 400 persons seeking marriage counseling at Family Service Association in 1949. i Only 10 per cent of the clients blamed in-laws, ae-

‘cording to Henry M. Gra“ham, general secretary of Family Service. More than one source of dificulty was listed by many of the applicants. Financial problems ranked second, being listed in "68 per cent of the cases. “The most frequent problem was sex adjustment between the

partners, Next came extra anarital affairs,” Mr, Graham ‘said. :

» . ” POINTS of conflict men- * tioned by clients follow: ONE: Sex—T79 per cent.

ii TWO: Financial difficulties— |

88 per cent. Two-thirds of these i were problems of family budgeting or debt situations. Oneinvolved .real financial need. THREE: Childre n—56 per ‘eent. Four-fifths involved difi» ferénces concerning disciplin‘ing children. In one-fifth the { problem was of unwanted chil- ' dren or wanting children and not having them. ¢ FOUR: Employment—53 per

cent. The most frequent prob- | lem was dissatisfaction with | the job or frequent changes of |

% job. ‘Next in frequency were :. problems of the wife's working,

“Jand third, unemployment prob-

lems.

%4t FIVE; Drinking—38 per “cent.

‘Occasional drinking created

[3 more problems than alcoholism.

SIX: Health —21 per cent, These problems were evenly di‘wided between physical and

1 mental health.

‘go wrong. He {row watches me

A white in the face.

‘ord to me any-

3

Ask Mrs. Manners—

I

SEVEN: Housing — 18 per cent Dissatisfaction.with hous ing involving poor physical facilities and doubling up of families, EIGHT: Education—15 per cent. Differences in education of husband and wife. NINE: Forced marriages—14 per cent. TEN: In-laws—10 per cent. Ee AT Gi AT THE BOTTOM of the list were differences in religion, | arguments over housekeeping standards, and domination of | husband or wife, ranging from | 5 to 8 per cent. “Nine of 10 couples among the 400 marriage counseling clients had children and in 85 per cent of these at least one | child showed effects of strained parental relationships,” Mr. Graham said. He mentioned the initial emotional effect on the child when a home is broken and the effect, particularly on boys, after the father leaves. “Boys need a male figure to identify with and pattern after. That's how boys learn to become men,” he | said, Another effect is a child's at-

tempt to copy misbehavior of | | misbehaving parents, ruining its | | character as well as its mar- |

i riage. Broken homes may cause children to become withdrawn, or make them overly protected | or overly aggressive. Often | they're emotionally and physi- | cally neglected. Frequently they're enlisted to take sides in

To Wives of Soldiers:

‘He, Too, Is

“DEAR MRS. 5. MANNERS:

I am ashamed to write this letter. My husband has been in the Army nine months. Where 1 work there is a very nice looking married man.

always talked to me a lot,

He asked me to spend a week-end with him. Before 1 Knew | 3 /‘iewhat was happening I said I would. But, Mrs. Manners, as soon as ‘ 1 never I have al“aways lived a decent life, but I was

IY said it I was sorry. ysvent and never will.

‘about ready

{nen he gets real

“more, but if he Bells lies and

.says I almost went with him I

“vould feel like a heel.

Should I stop working there or .istay on? I've been there a long

“time.

~ I don't know if I should stop “speaking to men or go ahead and

ibe friendly.

* 1 have learned he dates lots of | gone at work and I think he be-|

ieves he can get anyone he wants.

I never said a word about this

‘to anyone but you, BROWN EYES.

Your husband is lonely, just like you. He's probably around girls just as willing to go out as the married man .is willing to take you out.

He's a lot of things yon |

_ aren't, too. He's away from

~ay

4p

.. home, away from familiar sur“iroundings, family and friends. He’s training to fight or maybe fighting already. He’s wonder-

«Ang if-his Job is safe, if his wife.

iis true, He likes to think—and

10 MAKE A WHITE CHRISTMAS THE WRITE CHRISTMAS

Lonely

But IT am in a spot.

He|

he needs to think—that you're in the home you made together, working to make come true the dreams you dreamed together. You know the wrong kind of life isn’t for you. thought of it made you unhappy. Think what a week-end would do to your conscience and hope

husband. Think what it would do to him, a man who needs all the hope in the future you and the rest of us can give him. You'll be lonely, asked ont and tempted wherever you go. | If you can’t join your husband, keep your eyes om your typewriter or wherever they belong at work, and sew yourself up with worthwhile projects at night. There are all kinds of things you can do, Red Cross and hospital work included.

for the future. You'd tell your |

OPEN TIL

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To Curb Your

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the conflict; Plained, -“FHE RATE or eOass patching up marriages was 60 per cent. “It could be much higher if people came to us

Mr. Giaham ex-

average length of marriage at

nine years; the average idura-*

and, a half years.

in present day parent-child relations, switch from the unwise period

; of bringing vp children by the

book, making them mark and cry it out no love or affection.

‘toe the showing Parents

P. M. DAILY SAT. 10 630 P.M.

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sooner,” Mr. Graham said. The |

{

i tio of marriage conflict at the | time help was sought was five |

“Common sense has incheased |

. now realize love and affection

and demonstration of them is

in what children need,” Mr, Gra-

ham said. “During the past 10 years there has teen tremendous in-

terest in” inter-family relation. | | ship. the time help was sought was |

People recognize they have problems. Once they recognize them, they do something about them, as.the 85 per cent increase in applicatjons.at Fam-

ily. Servic: alone in the past |

three years proves,” Mr. Gra-

{| ham concluded.

_There -has been a |

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x Difficulties Are Most Frequently rh y Couples Here as Cause of Marital Discord

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Peanut Production

By Science Service

WASHINGTON, Dec. 2 — Pea-

Hits Record High |

come close to 11,400,000 tons in ithe shell this year, the highest

{nuts, peanuts, peanuts. More pea- on record.

inuts. In fact, the department of! agriculture reports, there will be ‘enough peanuts grown around the world in 1950 ‘to set an alltime record. 3 This is despite a lower-than-usual peanut output by U. 8. farmers, who Teduced their acrejage by 9 per cent this year at {government - request. The result {was the smallest peanut erop isince 1941 in the United States— {885,700 tons as compared to 937,-

1900 tons last year. But in the rest of the world, {booming crops were grown to satjisfy the demand by humans and {livestock for peanuts. All told, the office of foreign agricultural rela-

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