Indianapolis Times, Indianapolis, Marion County, 31 March 1949 — Page 18

PACE 18 | nh Happened Last Night—

Wit and Rumor | Top N.Y.Humor

Devil's Ahead in Husing's Heavenly Baseball Yarn

a s—————

- oo - |

“By Earl Wilson P NEW YORK, Mar. 31—My own little aphorism, from|

my own poor little brain: “No wise man ever gives advice—

ps p

he sells it.’ {

~ - Hn TED HUSING tells this baseball story: Time, 1990 A.D. The Devil phones Heaven, challenges Joe McC arthy, | manager of Heaven's ball team, to an out-of-this-world

series. “Why,” says Joe, “you wouldn't

Earl's Pearls | Max Asnas, the du Maupassant, should have to

p chance with my club! I've . iy all wan, N. Y. Yankees — oo pay money into Gehrig, Ruth, DiMaggio...” i the counterman . “1,” says the Devil, “have: the ” union's health umpires.” fh fund. “I pay to rr make them

I LIKE THAT crack by screen writer Henry.’ Ephron who says one Hollywood scenarist’'s mother lives in a small town. “He doesn't send her -a letter all. year, then on Mother's Day he sends her a telegram and scares hell out of her.

healthy,” he says A a “go they can « fight me.” Miss West Mae West mentions that all the world loves a lover, unless they're sitting in front of vou at the theater.

#owo" from Hot Spring 15 pounds’ My Ranting Readers: Bill Jighter Whitehorn—"Going to a friends » wn house to view television saves a WF’'LL miss Harry King, the

white-whiskered 91-year-old pan-

lot of barfare.” ” handler who just died. He made

j ‘Earl's Girls people smile while taking their . money v His favorite speech was: “Would

vou be inclined to help a young fellow who's looking for work and is afraid he'll find it? » » o

WHO'S NEWS: Vicki Evans, who's making dough in West Coast theaterson her Mitchum case publicity, will tour the

tank towns. . .. Radio rumor has ‘Pon A meche getting the spot vacated by Alan {Young on the |Jimmy Durante program. . . . | Milton Berle and

f

4hat purty,

Connie Haines, {jptanist Stan flirty singer at the Copacabana. Freeman have . =» written a song

TALLULAH Bankhead’s new called “No Fair { Bi enthusiasm is a cab driver whom Cryin’” to be Miss Boyar she invited to a party at her published by apartment. She's’ fond of him gShapiro-Bernstein. . "Peggy because he looked at her guests! joyce and b. f. Jan Falk are goand said, “This is something out jne to Europe next month—he to of ‘The Snake Pit'” and loudly gweden and she to Paris—they’ll confided to them that he believed | ..t in London. . Monica her name should be “Tallulah Boyar opens at Le Ruban Blou

Crackhead.” ~ ~ ” FRED ALLEN Henry Mor- The Midnight Earl gan’'s “sponsor’-—will appear on B'WAY BULLETINS: Sally

Morgan's NBC program for the next few weeks. Sunday night Allen had the gag of the week About the woman who had a job in a wine factory stepping on the

grapes. She got fired ‘when they found out ‘the sat down on the She was getting $2500 a

Job. week. . . . Stars in Miami gave a big benefit at the Beachcomber

Rand has dragged her fans out of the Clique Club ahead of time after a dispute with the management, which’ll rush in a new show,

~ » » ONE OF New York's biggest for fellow performer Emil Boreo landmarks suddenly looks a iot who may never work again... 4 different. ghor's back Frank Palumbo will soon an

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| Berle's TV

Berle's mother was the camera- with stealing a car from a public Treicher of 315 Swiss francs IIA. “Tomedian to the last, garage, explained today that he {about $80) and escaped In an | Jack Carter ad libbed as he was got “tired w aiting for. a bus.” ' automobile. ® - -

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oh THE INDIANAPOLIS TIMES

VA Notes Two Gl Leave Changes

"Rules Also Apply

| 3 $3

Science Medal

senior, has been named 1949 win-

the highest

s | } To On-Job Trainees iT ont Rabi The Indianapolis Regional ord in science |Office of the Veterans Adminis-| subjects during

his high course.

[tration today announced two ma-| school {jor changes in leave policies for| | veterans studying in schools be{low the college level and on-the-|

[job trainees under the GI BIlL | ONE: These ‘veterans will be| lentitled to apply for 15 days'| {leave at the end of their training] in addition to leave granted dur-| {ing their training. | TWO: The institutions in which | these veterans are training will have complete responsibility for| Howe track queen the granting- of leaves with aigre Barbara Cox maximum of 30 days in a year. seniors; : This responsibility will not extend ||gs, to the 15-day leave at the end gpg lof training, the VA said. and Bernice Reed and May Ask Leave Hatfield, frosh candidates. The Under the new policy a veteran queen will be crowned at the may apply for leave at the end of [Southport meet Tuesday on the training is he has a sufficient home field. - amount .of “eligibility” remain- — TT —

gible for competition for five scholarhips sponsored by Bausch & Lomb Optical Co. in the University of

0

Bob Bohn {Rochester,

| —

candidates Lola Brady, Jane Goken, Nina DalJuniors; Connie Simmons Janet Callon, sophomores,

Miss Thora Gentry, graduate nurse in the Indiana University. Medical Center, arranges a display of ceramic dolls of her own manufacture as part of the two-day annual hobby show of the university training school for nurses. The show, in the Ball Resi-

Bob Bohn, Howe High School

iner of the Bausch & Lomb Hon-| lorary ‘Science Award Medal. for]

i

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dence on the Medical Center campus, will close tonight.

or ing to cover the leave. down the aisle to wed 5

“Institutions will be required to

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Philly Click Club. . . . Thanks pretty Joan Mann yesterday. He to the stars—and to the audience said, “IT don’t.” who nelped the blind at the Judge Ed Brand, the marrying Lights On” benefit The judge of, Hollywood, discussing John Croshbys had a daughter.... how bu#y he keeps, said, “Hardly

report unauthorized absences only to the VA in addition to time off in excess of 30 working days in a calendar year. Such .reports are necessary, the

Crooner Bill Lawrence, the new a week passes that 1 don’t marry wonder-boy, landed the Perry a Westmore regional VA office pointed out, so Como summer replacement and LE ~ that appropriate reductions may ) Bar Buzz be made in veterans’ subsistence W

starts June 3... . Auto insurance

are headed down. been alllowances, The regional office

has a emphasizes that all schools and

premiums FD LUCKENBACH

# = » squiring Fran Keegan, who now i . : . ALL OVER: Joey Adams aspires to'television ... Marilyn training institutions, including crashed Hollywood -—he opened at Maxwell leaves this week to do colleges, were to continue report- . Ci ing all interruptions in training Slapsie Maxie's last night . personal appearances for “Cham- —

Mrs. Stan Garfinkel is the chick- pion.” . . . McCarthy and Farrell est thing yet. She wears a pearl open at the Roxy Apr. 15. Glad to Oblige

attached to a velvet band on her Rocketeer John ‘Griggs offers - PARIS, Mar. 31 (UP)—Hans forehead. (Looks lovely, too.) this philosophy: “Two can live Treicher of Paris had some nn x » as cheaply as one can play gin money to deposit and asked a Shorties rummy.” ... That's Earl, brother. stranger to direct him to the bank. The stranger obliged by PHIL. BAKER says he looked WINS ‘REST’ IN JAIL escorting him there. But once

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so bad when he subbed on Milton show that he suspects 31

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