Indianapolis Times, Indianapolis, Marion County, 5 October 1948 — Page 11

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* IT'S BETTER than A‘ mMartnT SL 6 p. —_— "Bet. In your makelp.” True

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ter than the 15 minutes’ shut-eye you get after the alarm goes off.. Better than a, free lunch the

day before/pay day. . Terrific,. . ’

For a quick pick-me-up that ‘makes you feel

"Ike a million (and alfmost every word is true),

there's. nothing ‘better than a penny scale that

coughs up thosé cards with character and weight *

readings,

~ gets -ealed “general” as often as

Lovely Ladies

- of the nearly nekkid

With’ all due respect to the makers of the ma- + chines, I must say I don’t hold much with the

“printed numerals that indicate I weigh 168 pounds,

166 pounds, 172 pounds. 3 Once I took my hat off and gained two pounds. Another time, after filling my lungs with a great quantity of air which almost created a vacuum In the mile square, 1 lost a pound from the previous reading of 170.

Who Cares About Weight Anyway? BUT, WE'RE not interested in weight, ate we? Who cares to find out he's 15 pounds underweight while dressed in an overcoat, long underwear and pen and pencil set “Who cares to find out he's.15 pounds overweight while dressed in an: overcoat, long uhderwear and pen and pencil set? It isn't worth a penny to find that out. t'is worth a penny, however, indubitably it is, to find out “You are quick to excuse faults in others, but you Insist on perfection in yourself.” That reminder comes on the back of a picture of Lucille Ball. How about that? A man would be a conceited jerk to believe the

" reading off of every single tab. Truthfully, of the

100 pennies I spent to get 100 character readings, I only had about 98 that hit the nail on the head. If you ever try 100 you'll see what I mean. The tab which I must be truthful about, with myself as well as you, read: “You have clear, forceful vision and empty dreams have no ‘place

in a have a character readwstinckaciuet:

ports the machine 99 39 per cent accurate.

"CHARACTER" For one "ved cent

downtown scale you can

Troe weight oun ‘Ones

NORFOLK, Va., Oct. 5—Vice Admiral R. O. Davis is a bulky, hard-headed, hard-working. ‘hard-driving ex-cruiser ¢ommander, who flies his flag at =ea, and who hasn't had a vacation since the war ended. Vice Admiral Fred Kirtland is a bulky, hardheaded, hard-working, hard-driving ex-battleship commander, whose flagship, the USS Alabama, steamed 175,000 miles in support of landings from the Gilberts to the Marianas, and in raids up through the Battle of the Philippines: Sea. Brig. Gen. W. A, Worton is a short, chunky ramrod-backed Marine, a hard-bitten pro who distinguished himself at Iwo Jima. They. form what, Admiral Davis calls a “commonsense command.” It is tough and practical and back:-breaking. Jt has snipped all tag-ends and Irish pennants from its operation. It has already achieved perfection in. the unification that Washington talks about and fails to deliver. Army, Navy, Marines and Air Force work for Admiral Davis, who commands the amphibious forces of the Atlantic Fleet. He qualifies for this job by virtue of having run amphibious training. from 1943 on— and we won a highly amphibious war.

Rides Desk Like a Warship

FRED KIRTLAND is Admiral Davis’ chief of staff, and is in direct charge of the base at nearby Little Creek. Kirtland rides a desk, +as boss of training, but he rides it like a battleship, and his vast grounds at Little Creek are operated like a war. He trains the experts, and hands them over for use by Gen. Worton, who schools the huge batches of men. Unless you are up on your military insignia, you can't tell whether an officer at Little Creek is an Army aviato¥, a Marine infantryman, a Navy gunnery expert or a Seabee. Admiral Davis “admiral.” One sample section of his flagship, the USS

WASHINGTON, Oct. 5—The white marble walls have been scrubbed until they are snowy. Fhe clerk in the-long-tailed coat has washed his hands in a patent basin that feeds so much water and no more. Oyez! The Supreme Court of the United States now is in session. Dignity oozes from the red velvet curtains. The nine not-so-old men in their long black robes are teetering back in their specially built-to-fit swivel chairs and I guess maybe I oughtn’'t to smile. But I can’t help contemplating the idea of their honors thumbing through some old issues of Esquire. magazine, observing the artistic merit ladies drawn by Senor Alberto Vargas. Nor can I keep from mind the picture of the Justices reading carefully that widely banned book, Memoirs of Hecate ‘County, in search of . feelthy passages, if any. What I mean is that life for a Supreme Court Justice is not all dust-dry statistics, legal tomes, and multi-million-dollar anti-trust .cases. Their honors get into some interesting stuff, too.

Signs $15,000-a-Year Contract TAKE THE CASE of Senor Vargas, the South American artist. He charges that when he couldn't read English well, and certainly not the fine print, he signed a contract to draw the ladies with the. legs for Esquire at $15,000 per year, He urges the Justices to look upon his undraped lovelies, appreciate their high artistic merit, and award him a good many thousands more. The magazine counters with the argument that heautiful legs are a dime a dozen and so are pictures of same. Claims the Senor.was well paid... For all I know the Justices are worrying about this problem now. “They've -also-got-to-settle. before. this. term. is. up whether the Hecate County book is fit to read. This is a kind of novel with a lot of big words and long sentences (if you'll pardon my being a literary critic for a minute) by Edmond Wilson,

The Quiz Master

Why do telephone wires hum?

Phone wires hum, electrical science rs

because the wind vibrates them and produces

sound waves, as do the strings In. a musical |

instrument. SPS When did Gene Tunney fight his last bout? On July 26, 1928," when he knocked Tom Heeney out in the 11th round of tthe an in New York City,

| _machine.

icklzoenanmplataly serious when the occasion demands it.”

empty dreams in my weaker moments, Not very often; understand, but on occasion my ‘clear, . forceful vision” is clouded by some silly idea like going out and buying a Hew Lincol Chevrolet (same price) or mentally counting the! million I'm going to make. May I suggest you don’t take more than a 100 pennies on a character-reading jag. The Jency| number of duplicates that occur have a tendency to make one self-conscious. At least, they should if you have character. It's significant that tabs with the same movie star have the same character reading. The tab! with. Claudette Colbert's picture on’ it informed me thusly: “You are the sort of person who sticks to his high ideals, even in the face of great diffi. culty.” The first one indicated I weighed 168; the

second, 162. Wasn't a very accurate investment

as far as weight was concerned. Weighing a trim 164 when William Poyell's pickure came tumbling into the metal cup ( nd time around I was a flabby 172), the inspiring bit of printing informed me “Your sunny attitude toward life is a constant inspiration to your friends.”

Neither of My. Two Friends Told Me

MY “sunny attitude toward life” was darkened momentarily when I realized that neither of my two friends ever told me I was an inspiration. I had to go to a machine, a cold hunk of iron, to get the facts. A man’s best friend could very well be a dog My work at one time was interrupted by a sidewalk character who demanded I tell him the why and wherefore of my activity. Remembering that about 28 pennies before this vile creature appeared, the cardboard with Don Ameche’s puss on it stated, to-wit: “Your even temper and selfcontrol have won many a battle,” I. refrained from kicking him in the shins, Instead, I gave “him a penny and begged him to take part in the fun. With a hiccup that was more prompted by bourbon than my generous offer, this mature ragamuffin hopped on the scale, The penny tinkled through the vitals of the “What's the prize?” asked therman of the street. “How tone no peanuts come out?’ « ode didn't take time to explain further. The pe oh Wrelghing. a wobbly 138, “pulled” tha" Lg

tangular piece of cardboard out ‘and managed “tos

thrust it in my hand. - got no glasses.” “You have clear, forceful vision and empty dreams have no place in your makeup.” - Before I had time to kick him in the shins he was screaming, “That's me. That's me exactly.” On the third ‘That's me,” I kicked. My composure was restored with the insertion of 39 more pennies. The one I liked best was “You have a joyous. outlook on life, but can be

“Read what it says. 1 ain't

True. Every word was true.

ora used |.

Taconic, would list a Navy commander, a Marine ]

major, an Army major, anc Army captain and a Navy leutenant jaygee. Davis and Kirtland are in the position’ of a man who may be called on to fight at any moment, while waiting delivery on a crate of machine guns,’ “We have kept the best of what we had and what we know,” says Davis. “We have eliminated the useless, and improved the useful. We have at

least fashioned a pistol to fight with while we wait| '

‘for the machine guns. It is better than trying to do it barehanded.” Davis is impatiently contemptuous of intersérvice squabbles if it impairs the security of his nation, and has succeeded in running an ideally integrated-command-—a command which turns out little. items such as two Marine divisions, fully trained in the most modern manner to get on a ship, take a beach, take the objective, hold it, and climb on a ship again, to come back a winner with fewest possible casualties.

Scornful of Wonder Weapons KIRTLAND is scornful of what he calls “the universal weapon,” a radar-guided, jet-powered, atom-héaded, germ-filled, gas-breathing wonder missile which will fly-in the air, go under the sea, cross water, clmb nountains, and perform uso, ~shows-for-troops.-He has an idea that you will keep on Winning] wars by taking troops and planes. and supplies in great quantity to the place where they are needed, use them to maximum ability, and then fetch them home again. This is not yet fully possible by air power alone—or by atom power alone, either. It has been Marine Gen. Worton’s experience that sea power and air power are no good unless you can put some troops ashore to take, hold, and rebuild an objective—a premise which receives full agreement from the admirals. Together, the three are laboring to build a cohesive force which can be used right now—not tomorrow, riext year, or 10 years hence. And thay will do it if it breaks every back on the place, including their own.

By Frederick Cc Othman

whose main job is reviewing books for the New Yorker magazine. This may be more of a reflection on me than the author, but I found’ it uniformly dull. Not so the guardians of public morals. They claimed that the chapter about a lady with golden hair and a brace on her back was smutty. And they demanded that the Supreme Court restrain Doubleday & Co. from selling any more copies, I can only presume that the Justices sent their clerk with the clawhammer coat downtown for nine copies of the memoirs. When the Justices get these read (and I don't envy them), they must turn their attention to the. barmaids of Michigan.

Says Legislature Is Cockeyed THE LEGISLATURE of that upstanding state passed a law saying that stirring martinis is no Joh for females. The Michigan lawgivers banned ladies from working in saloons and, well, you know -the ladles. They said the state Legislature

was cotkeyed, and also that saloons didn't lower the morals of barmaids, but that barmaids raised the tone of saloons. . The high court, fortunately, does not have to| ponder the propriety of ladies working behind the beer spigots of Michigan. All it has to decide is wéther the Legislature has the right to bar: the girls from the bars, The 300 other cases before the court seem to} be of more interest to lawyers and financiers than| ‘fo me, although there is one involving a rich widow who was swindled by a city slicker. Every-| M body admits “that, including the slicker. - Now Uncle 8am wants his share of the ill-gotten gains. ~Claims they are taxable income. One other thing: That wash Bowl Hientiotied in the opening paragraph. Nobedy has wash basins. like . the. Supreme. Court... Turn. .on,.thel. hot water and you can’t turn it off. Just as it is about to overflow the bowl, something inside clicks, an the high court's: wash water stops| gushing. w

77? Test Your Skill ???

Why are there so many small islands scat tered around the South Pacific? Because there is a big mountain range on the | floor of the ocean. The small islands are the | peaks of the largest mountains. *

* Iz it the male or female Emu that does the

hatching of the eggs? ‘Incubation is performed hy the male, which sits ‘from u to 56 da days. |

{ ’

»

tag

Sally McGook, Grooms

Picture Stary by Victor Petetion

®

4. A § dba a

ANOTHER BAW: Ths Goiad Bats “span “athtuly rk ae

yawning aristocratically is ‘Blakeen Coronet, affectionately nown as Sally McGook.” Sally is one of the pure bred dogs which will compete Sunday in the 33d annual all-breed dog show sponsored by the Hoosier Kennel Club in the Manufacturers Buildin

State Fairgrounds. Gettin comes of good stock and su andt, 5115 Maple. Lane.

shown by Mr. and Mrs. Dan

“TAKING A TRIMMING==There: Tost 5 roend foe this primping in the powder parlor. It never would do to have stray ends of hair ruin a perfect coiffure so Miss Alandt smoothes the rough edges. Sally has completed her points for championship subject to approval - by the American Kennel Club. She is owned and will be

g ready to show really is something of a chore, but Saly mits to her tubbing administered by Miss Catherine A

Henderson, 1517 Mill Ave.

ym Si A its

THIS IS. NO JOKE—AIlthough a snowy white, Sally will get doused: with a gen-

erous supply of powder be

fore she goes in the ring. This is called chalking and lends.

an unnatural whiteness to her fur. At the show, she will be joined by three of her play-

mates, -all French poodles owned by Mr. and Mrs, Henderson.

Their ‘other entrants

are Mary Land Jo Ann, and Mary Land Jacqueline and Inky Dink, all puppies.

~Leprosy.ls.Among. Incurable Diseases Found Rampant in Warm, Rainy Carolines in Pacific ‘By GEORGE WELLER, Times Foreign Correspondent

Japan. Bequeathed Islands, Also Sick Headache to U. S.

lap people, still uninfected with Island’ was placed under “quaranleprosy..to Oroluk, an uninhabited ine

atoll northwest of Ponape.

he In dianapolis CHOON mrss TREE STURIDAY DETORERE 108m gn er

-Doggy Affair As

WATCH. THE- CUTICLE, PLEASE—Sally. obijaction. when Miss Aland got around to the pedicure. The file is no gag. When Sally's ‘nails need a trimming, this is the file that does the job. Naturally ‘nail ‘polish is ‘taboo, but it would add an interesting touch. The two-and-a-half-year-old poodle will be entered in the open bitches class. The show, one of the seven largest in the entries from 22 states, Canada and England. The doors will be open from 9 a. m. to 6 p. m. and more than 3000 spectators are © expected to attend.

But atolls always have less wa-

y 1 DC . { h oe ”

rg

Re

MILADY'S- SOUDOIR. dna Hpically. Totminine room, Sally Tuxuriates-in: the — “uf her pure fur. A French poodle, her hair naturally twists into hiker little-curls.” These must be combed out for proper dress. ing at show time. Meanwhile, more than 750 other dogs. are being groomed by their masters for the largest show i in Hoosier Kennel Club history,

DR EV SN x gover

voiced a bit of

Midwest, “has

FINISHED PRODUCT—With ‘justified ‘pride, Miss Alandt. stands back and surveys-her handiwork. It has been a long, hard job but it will B& worth the effort if Sally runs off with top honors. She should give all comers a real battle.

Rita - Johmon Able

To Take First: Steps

for several. months... ...... an Op The best way discovered of re-!

Rr

take her first steps since she og A

a lleving patients was to tap their [ter than cloud-catching “hi, isPONAPE, Caroline Island, Oct. 5—Leprosy and encephalitis are). nds.” While pom ugh ie snce thus decreasing pressure two incurable diseases of the warm, rainy, Eastern Carolines in-

{fish, it lacks the cocoanut palms oa the brain. bettie By She AirieaN iminjtration 1 from Is Spanish, German that are the staple of island life. Several Pohapeans soli that 3 on tiny inlet at the mouth of Ponape’s reef rimmed harbor is | An Shideme of Smeephalitis the mystery disease also swept the smallest leprosarium in the Pacific. Until recently it had five SWeP Fonape last fall an ®ithe island [under ‘the Japanese.

eee en spring. This disease still mystifies , o - lepers; now it has eight. All are ["pingejap's lepers will probably | rE. T ‘and’ a team ' of ysiesian La en} gr

from Pingelap, a poor and dirty ps pmioved to the new leper col-|ists were dispatched here from island in the Eastern Carolines. ,.y of. the trust territory at!the naval hospital at Bethesda, LhaL. the disease may recur by! Pingelap is dirty because. it's Tinian’ In ‘the Martanas, ‘which Md. In Pohape the: disease caused pa -mycast . ; ”, f osis, a rare form o

short of water and rain catch- opened this month, ; agonizing headaches and some, ney surgery ments. The inability to wash fre-| With the successful transplant- paralytic effects, fungus of the lungs, has also been clot “on her she was

fered a brain concussion Sept, 6 when struck on the head by « Bair dryer a her home.; , i The actress was ‘unconscious for nearly ‘three weeks and her

pg

quently, the Navy believes, may ing of the bomb-blasted people of The carrier of the disease, is found here, Popane'a warm. and|gterbe the cause of the odd concen- Eniwetok to Ujelang in the Mar- unknown, but it is believed it may, [ain climate is an ideal germ uiq he ox

tration of leprosy there. Yaws is|shalls, a plan is under consider be the mosquito, Upward of 70 go home also common. » ation to move. the parched Pinge-icases broke out Hye, and the Ba pe pa