Indianapolis Times, Indianapolis, Marion County, 20 May 1948 — Page 19

By Ed Sovola

ae + TEA a Fa Getting off instructions and up we’ went. -No problem * at all getting out to the Speedway. vid | At 900 feet the problem of getting to and; from the Speedway became ridiculously simple. | Automobiles along 16th St. moved nicely. The!

a. Q RGR ‘ Sa pa at w Jax Ld CL pu i ) . - . iv Sh . er LL THURSDAY, MAY 20, 1048 li GE 19 | home inetd 4 with tongue in cheek, IT looked at State Troopers Lt, Earl Smith and Capt. Kermit Lewis

as they expounded the first three letters of the

ings with Mes . « + to hang! ow price. ti-colors.

alphabet in conjunction with trafic, “All right, gentlemen, I believe you. There shouldn't be any jams in or around the Speedway. The many times I got fouled up and had to walt 10 ‘minutes to move ‘three feel ‘along town Rd., I'll ¢ ' up to bad dreams.”= . Smith of Capt. Lewis, in. We were going to look e air and check the communiWith my huge traffic pattern of nin thoroughfares flying in the wind, I ¢ into the State Police airplane. _~¥rom the looks of the map, the number of stations and personnel that will handle traffic

parked vehicles in the infield presented an orderly

picture, - Lt. Smith the ship toward 30th St.

The map showed that on Memorial Day there Rd. and Northwestern Ave,

the ‘critical area and the Pagoda which the nerve center of the big day. Of course, the plane will. be available for instantaneous checking

tion,

race -day,-a. man. should be able to drive at 20.

miles per hour from the Circle ali the way into Grandstand B.

Different on Race Day Jrith “UNDERSTAND,” began Capt. Lewis,” we don't have the plan in operation today. There's only a skeleton force working.” Over the noise of the engine I shouted that I understood perfectly. Race day it would be different. "THe Map couldn't be wrong. Afterall, there was 16th St, Georgetown Rd. 30th St. U. 8. 52, Lyndhurst Dr. and others that were marked in deep blue. Deep blue, I gathered, meant that traffic should flow over them fast, Lt. Smith and Capt. Lewis were up in the

gauge thinkers say no immediate forseeable war;

THE BIG PLAN—These three sky policemen (left to right], Lt. William Hague, city police; Lt. Earl Smith and Capt. Kermit Lewis, State Police, will have all the say-so from the sky to traffic operational centers on the graund during the "500." : ’

Just Ducky

NEW YORK, May 20—The stock market bulled up over the week-end and an economist says he can't spot a depression for ages and the Russians have hauled in their horns some and the heavy-

OK. So if everything is lovely for the moment, give or take a few strikes, could we please have some back on the wondrous widgets that all us rich, happy, peaceful people are busting a gusset to buy? Like automobiles. How much does a car cost? I dunno. I remember when every lush, full-color shot of an auto, especially photographed to make it look longer, wider and lusber, used to sport a neat little figure saying $925, FOB Detroit, or whatever. The radio with the built-in dog kennel knocked you for so many dollars, so many cents. It said so in the body type. The department store ads in the newspapers still give you a ‘thorough rundown on most items, but the national ads in the slick-paper magazines have developed a splendid aloofness from sordid cash, ever since the post-war made desirable things scarce. Are they ashamed of the price rises, or what? Or do they assume that everybody’s so filthy rich that cost is merely incidental to purchase? r

Aloof From Price Tags I JUST WHIFFLED through a national weekly magazine, ‘figuring I might like to buy me a Cadillac or a washing machine—if I just knew how much money it would take—and the only articles I could find that wore a financial description were some clocks, watches and bathing drawers, Everything else was beautifully anonymous in the price-tag department. In addition to the delicate refusal to talk ough with the huyer, most. of these descriptive

‘hapsodies ‘are 41f rashed out in fine print—such -

8 if you wish the special fluid wheez-o-lectric underdrive, also the vital steering wheel, there ‘will be. a slight extra charge. How slight? Tell me now, daddy, I'm old enough to know these things. Co "

rr —— ee

Two Little Pats

“WASHINGTON, Wi 20-11 betories my sole

emn duty today to report on the gallant Senator, who was cheated by. a beautiful lady from Des Moines of two small pats, No smiles, please. h were special,’ serious-pats. = : The subject hefore the Senate Finance Committee was butter vs, oleomargariné, The lawgivers had been warned by the National Grange that there’d been too much levity surrounding the butter makers’ battle to keep the ancient federal tax on oleo, Soberly the Senators regarded Mrs. Stella E. Barker as she sat down in a black dress with the new look.

Having identified herself as a homemaker, Towa restaurant proprietress, clubwoman, and a lady who prefers butter when she can get it, she dumped on the table a brown-paper package. A similar package, she said, had gone to every Senator. Sen. Scott W, Lucas of Illinois, ‘said e didn't get one. “You shall have this as soon as I am through,” ald Mrs. Barker, ripping open her box and exracting from it one silver knife, two white plates nd one pound of butter and one of margarine, i) identical packages. The Senators were fasclated as she stripped the tissue from the cubes

f butter and oleo, and sliced a piece of each.

fDaintily she placed a slab of butter on one plate; chunk of margarine on the other.

What, No Bread—

“DID YOU BRING rany bread?” inquired irman Eugene D. Milliken of Colorado. “No, sir, I am sorry” replied Mrs. Barker, peering at him from beneath her black straw pallor hat and shuffling the platés, as though she or operating a shell game, which-<in a way— : was. At least she defied the lawmakers to , Which was butter and which was oleo. “1 On’t know, myself, which is butter,” she added.

—— ee ————

the Quiz Master

EE eh eee

* will be a lot less squawking.”

—and-raincoats--and--ears-and-

- Mae?

It was simple. A flew a plane on race day?”

Lt. Smith lost the controls Yor a second ang|

Capt. Lewis shuddered even more than the plane No good, It was then that the troopers told me. the CAA has forbidden all private and commercial planes to fly over the track May 31. Lt. Smith began to crawl toward me, forgot for a second that the plane had dual - trols. I thought I was going to be tossed out the ship. I thought we were going to crash. “I'll keep my mouth shut,” I yelled. Phew-w-w, Come to find out, Lt. Smith wanted me to sit up in front so I could see better and so he could work with the radio equipment in the -back. That's better. . Capt. Lewis wound the plane around the track while Lt. Smith checked the communication system.

Lt. Smith, In less than half a minute the gate was checked and a report made. Wonderful.

The captain gave me a few pointers which

every person at the race should know. In the first place, don't argue with a traffic officer. The over-all picture may not fit in with your particular plans but in the long run, you'll get out quicker. Another important thing is, don't

special-routes.-You-may-have.{o.drive. a...

request little farther but you'll save time in the end. The theory the law enforcement agencies will be working on is that if a road is not working, it should and will be if all motorists follow directions, “We intend to keep everything moving,” said Capt. Lewis. “If we are successful in that, there

—. True, captain. Race day I'll be at sea level seeing how it works from a bumper’'s-eye view. I won't argue, squawk or ask special favors. Just get me home. The plan Jooks good from 1000 eet,

When the man is singing me a torch Boog! about this is the finest tire that ever blew out, or this is the niftiest little bottle of gin that ever Yed you to slug a copper, I sure would appreciate a slight ‘clue to the cost. They hawk their shoes and piston rings, but they never say a mumbling word about how much you got to have with you to take them home for keeps. Say I am in the market today for an outboard! motor. I have just seen a lovely color presentation of the wonders of the new Evinrude. Does it cost six bucks? Six hundred? Nobody tells me. Is it a secret? to talk dollars with a customer?

Stripped-Down Prices Quoted

AND EVEN in the instances where a price is actually quoted, they give it to you in a sneaky

Is it bad taste

way, often basing it on the stripped, or bare-|}

essential model of whatever you're buying. Say it’s a nickel-trimmed, fur-lined dilidropper. They say it so much, and then they put a little cross by the price, and down in the agate print it says: Subject to so-and-so-much tax. After that they shove in a little asterisk, and some more fine print says: “There will be a small additional charge for fhe ball-bearing undergrommick and the stainless steel whisboffer. It so happens

that I buy no-dilldrepper-uniess it- comes complete k and whisboffer. How much,

with un What does it set me back? The modern refrigerator has built-in radar, technicolored ice cubes, and separate machinery for distilling applejack, plus orchid-growing compartments, but whether they go for a buck or a billion is never told. What's the damage? What do I gotta give to get one? I seem 10 remember that when the manufac-| turers were competing in a tough customers’ market they slapped a fixed price on everything| from sheets to Shinola, and we had no haughty | mysticism about how much was. it, then. I assure you nobody is going to bruise my delicate sensi-| bilities by introducing the dollar sign into national | marketing, And if they introduce it low enough,!

| | [

By Frederick C. Othman

ken to taste both,” said Sen, Edward J, Thye of Minnesota. - “Gladly,” responded Mis. Barker, Nandlmg the two. plates up. to the chairman, . “No,” boomed. Sen. Milliken, brushing them aside. “I am going to hear the evidence, but J am not going to eat it.” Sen. Edward Martin of Pennsylvania, regarded the chairman sympathetically. He observed that Pennsylvania apple butter suited him. Sen. Lucas reached over for both plates and (sniff, sniff) smelled them cautiously.

Leave the Butter, Eat the Plates

“A COUPLE of good hot biscuits would be of help to the chairman,” sald Sen. Alben W. Barkley of Kentucky. “Perhaps we should leave the butter and eat the plates,” Sen. Milliken replied. This debate left Mrs. Barker unfilustered. Thus far, ‘5 ‘mean. Calmly she toyed with her butter knife and calmly she told the Senators that too many restaurant owners foist off oleo as butter. She sald a survey indicated that in San An. tonio, Tex. 18 restaurants out of 20 sampled, served oleo instead. of butter. Fifteen out of 20 in Louisville, Ky., did the same and seven out of 20 in Atlanta, Ga. Only in Los Angeles, she said, did the investigators get butter 20 times in 20 tries. When Mrs. Barker finished her testimony she rewrapped her mangled packages of butter and oleo and handed them to Sen. Lucas. “I am sorry to cheat you out of two little pats,” she apologized. “Two little pats!” exclaimed the courtly gentleman from Havana, Ill, “Madam, I assure you it is my loss.” ’ Mrs. Barker didn't say anything. Just blushed, prettily, I think, is the word.

??? Test Your Skill ???

What is the correct name for the National Cathedral in Washington, D, C.? ¢

The Oathedral Church of St. Peter and St. |

Paul. When completed it will be among the 10 ‘Igrges eccleciastical structures in the world.

> & o : ‘/ What discovery enabled Nobel to endow the famous peace prize? . The’ discov

“They want us to check the main gate,” called|

| | ~

Six thousand?|

permit Sem, Milli TEE

A / , [ ; oh ae

im-mm—-Ouch-Ah, Cut it Short With Lots of Tonic

That's Better,

(Picture Story by Victor Peterson)

TIME FOR his neck like a turtle as he sits in the barber's chair waiting to feel the first bite of the clippers. To many youngsters, the. process of getting a haircut is an ordeal. In this series of pictures, the candid camera mirrors. a wide. variety of facial contortions as- Skipper gets

his first short shear for summer.

HELPLESS ANTICIPATION — If you have forgotten how your early haircuts affected you, take a good look at Skipper. The scissors snip and hair falls. Some of it will cred down his back and itch. More will fall over his eyes and Skipper will rub them hard. Still more will get in his nose and he'll blow and blow THI BOY Growing up. vr

HIS FAVORITE SCENT — Just about the best smelling stuff in . the world is- what Skipper thinks of the perfumed hair oil Mr. Leo. sone

“here rubs on the shorn locks: The fist-grader at School 77 feels he

”

just about is ready, to smile again. Another.ordeal has passed. *

A TRIM — Addison (Skipper) Johason Jr. pulls in

used to such squirmers as’ Skipper.

Jt all is part of being talks about, But the end i

~ HURT OR TICKLE—As the clippers buzz along his ear, Skipper grimaces and tries to duck away. The 6-year-old son of Mr. and Mrs. Addison Johnson, 25 N. Webster Ave., knows this is just the start of a 15-to-20-minyte session of clipping and cutting. Like any veteran barber, however, Criss Scarpone, 6127 E. Washington St., is

. HEY, THAT HURT — Skipper let out a howl when he irked away from Mr. Scarpone and the clipper caught to give a. hank of * hair-a tug. In later years, Skipper will find that a barber's chair is | one of the best places in the world to catch those 40 winks everybody Ii d :

OU «mnie ONO sight. ore agont m fr \ Raireut wil Be i A pe

_ OH, IT WASN'T HALF BAD — His hair slicked back, Skippet’ gives himself a big smile as he looks in the: mirror, With Shingo haircut only something in the future, he says with bravado that really isn’t anything to it. “Just get in the chair nd :