Indianapolis Times, Volume 45, Number 267, Indianapolis, Marion County, 19 March 1934 — Page 5

MARCH 19, 1934

It Seems to Me By Heywood Broun IHAVE done those things which I ought not to have done, and in addition to being a miserable sinner I am a pretty bad reporter. Miami had an interesting sociological phase into which I have not delved at all. Next to Los Angeles it is the favorite winter home of those who identify themselves on Jury lists as "retired.” If the world is moving—and I think it is—toward an economic structure in which nobody much works before 18 and 1 after 50, these

havens of the sideliners will present interesting and difficult problems. I doubt that many laborers in drains or ditches would protest vigorously if Florida tapped them at the half-century mark and said. "From this time on you get the same wages for doing precisely nothing.” But all painters, many physicians and quite a few newspaper men would complain bitterly. I would raise hell myself. BBS Feic in Corners Happy IHAVE not seen, in New York or even in Miami many chimney corner warmers who seemed

Heywood Broun

to me deliriously happy. Horseshoe pitching appears to be the traditional recreation of all retired members of the middle class. I can not see myself as getting a full day out of that. Retired capitalists live a somewhat more varied twenty-four hours, and yet even in their eyes I catch a note of restlessness. F P A has announced on many occasions that if he had a million dollars he never would write a paragraph. The controversy is quite academic on both sides, but I wholly disagree with him. One of the penalties of being a columnist is that you put yourself in the fire-horse class. I’d drop poker, a winning streak at the track and a run of No. 11 in an instant to thump the keys about anything which commanded my interest. I'd have to. In fact, I think a good form of contract would be for the columnist to get paid only for his days. On such occasions he has a right to say: "You ought to pay me for Friday, bass. That was hard work. You don’t think I wrote that on purpose.” The most prominent member of Miami’s retired men's club is George Ade, who for a time was a reporter. I believe Mr. Ade does a little work in freshening up his "Fables in Slang” for syndicate purposes, but he is in the main retired. Very little has come from his pen in the last ten years. I have no inside information as to whether or not Mr. Ade is happy, but I do hate to see him quite so retired. a tt tt Room for More of Mr. Dooley IT is none of my business, and yet I feel grieved to find any man who was so essential in American letters going A. W. O. L. The last time I ran into Peter Dunne I almost was tempted to wiggle an admonitory finger in his face and say. “You have a right to do some more about Mr. Dooley.” Time has dealt more kindly with the observations of the philosopher of Archy Road than with the patters which were spun by Mr. Ade. Certain phrases out of Mr. Dooley still stride sidewalks of memory and need not give an inch to any man. The years have rolled over Ade s medium, although not his subject matter. I mean the ideas are still vital, but the turn of the phrase, according to the American idiom, is hopelessly out ot date. Asa matter of fact, I gravely suspect that George Ade's slang was never more than a device. He had no such knowledge of the Arherican language at any time as has been mastered by Lardner. Mencken, Winchell. Runyon and Hemingway. I do not rank Runyon as yet on a par with Lardner in the art of the short story, but on ear alone he leads the pack. But even if it w T ere not quite true Ade did have the reputation in his day of being in the thick of the current. Today he is so retired, so aloof from life and so naive that he has asked me what horse I thought would win the current race. To be sure, even if George Ade never v.Tites another line he is sure of a place in any definitive history of American literature and the American theater. People w T ho think that there was no satire m our musical comedy until Kau’man and Ryskind have quite forgotten "The Sultan of Sulu.’’ tt tt tt Ade’s Great Prizefight Beat AND both "The County Chairman” and "The College Widow” have inspired at least a hundred hits in the last twenty years. Mr. Ade told me sadly that when an effort was made recently to sell "The College Widow” for talking picture rights it was discovered that the story already had been done a dozen times under various names in Hollywood. Mr. Ade seems to be pretty chipper, even though he did report the championship fight between Corbett and Sullivan. He beat the town by half an hour by jumping into a cab after the knockout. All the telegraphers at the ring were so engrossed by the contest that they left the copy pile up by their wires and sent nothing while the fight was on. The ring was more romantic then, and Mr. Ade told me he actually saw many men in the New Orleans arena who wept literal tears because the reign of John L. Sullivan was ended. But what I liked best was his story of James Whitcomb Riley and the undertaker who called himself a mortician. Riley always hated the man. “I know he'll get me in the end." said the poet, "but until then I just want to keep away from him.” And Rilev died, and his body was committed to the mortician who left it in an outer room. When he returned the door was bolted on the inside. A Negro helper was assigned to go up a ladder and through the window. Halfway up he paused and asked. "Who’s in that room ’cept Mr. Riley?” "Nobody,” said the mortician "Then who bolted the door?” They could not answer the question and the Negro came down quickly from the ladder. Eventually th. took off the hinges, but the mystery of Riley and the inner bolt has not been solved from that day until this. (Copyright. 1934. bv The Times)

Your Health BY DR MORRIS EISIIBEIN-

SINCE the outbreak of amebic dysentery, from a source in two Chicago hotels, the whole country has become aware of this disorder, which formerly was considered a tropical disease. Instead of being caused by an ordinary germ, this condition is caused by a large type of organism known as the entameba histolytica. This organism gets into the large bowel, and once there sets up symptoms that are exceedingly serious. Moreover, the organism may spread to the liver, particularly, or to other organs of the body and there set up secondary places of infection which also are a menace to health and life. Although this condition formerly was unheard of in the northern portions of the United States, more recent evidence indicates that from 5 to 10 per cent of all the people in this country are infected. o a u THE organism which causes this disease multiplies in the bowel and gives off daughter cysts. These cysts are passed out of the body with the excretions. and if they reach food or drink are swallowed in the natural way. They pass through the stomach and small intestines and then get into the upper portions of the large intestines. Here they divide up and multiply organisms which invade the walls of the bowels. Ordinarily, the entameba histolytica which infects mankind comes in food or drink that has been contaminated. in the manner suggested. one AFTER a person has had the disease and recovered, he may carry the organisms in his bowel for long periods of time. and. as a carrier of the disease, constantly is able to transmit it to other persons. These carriers, who apparently are healthy or who have mild symptoms of the infection, are the ones most concerned in transmitting the disease. Occasionally, however, the disease is transmitted by impure water supply. It was thought in the past that these methods of transmission were of comparatively little importance in this country, except in the rural districts where persons deposit their excretions on the soil, and i-here wells and springs are the chief sources of the water supply.

"THE LIFE OF OUR LORD" TI/ , _ The Manuscript Kept Written by (_ HARLE S DICKENS Secret for 85 Years

CHAPTER THE ELEVENTH PART TWO WHEN that morning began to dawn, Mary Magdalene and the other Mary, and some other women, came to the Sepulchre, with some more spices which they had prepared. As they were saying to each other, "How shall we roll away the stone?” the earth trembled and shook, and an angel, descending from Heaven, rolled it back, and then sat resting on it. His countenance was like lightning, and his garments were white as snow; and at sight of him, the men of the guard fainted away with fear, as if they were dead. Mary Magdalene saw the stone rolled away, and waiting to see no more, ran to Peter and John who were coming toward the place, and said "They have taken away the Lord and we know not where they have laid him!” They immediately ran to the Tomb, but John, being the faster of the two, outran the other, and got there first. He stooped down, and looked in, and saw the linen clothes in which the body had been wrapped, lying there; but he did not go in. When Peter came up, he went in, and saw the linen clothes lying in one place, and a napkin that had been bound about the head, in another. John also went in, and saw the same things. Then they went home, to tell the rest. But Mary Magdalene remained outside the Sepulchre, weeping. After a little time, she stooped down, and looked in, and saw Two angels, clothed in white, sitting where the body of Christ had lain. These said to her, “Woman, why weepest Thou?” She answered, “Because they have taken away my Lord, and I know not where they have laid him.” As she gave this answer, she turned round, and saw Jesus standing behind her, but did not then know Him. “Woman,” said he, “Why weepest Thou? What seekest thou?” She, supposing Him to be the gardener, replied. “Sir! If thou hast borne my Lord hence, tell me where thou hast laid him, and I will take him away.” Jesus pronounced her name “Mary!” Then she knew him. and starting, exclaimed “Master!”—“Touch me not,” said Christ; “for I am not yet ascended to my father; but go to my disciples, and say unto them I ascend unto my Father, and your Father; and to my God, and to your God!”

Accordingly, Mary Magdalene went and told the Disciples that she had seen Christ, and what He had said to her; and with them she found the other women whom she had left at the Sepulchre when she had gone to call those two disciples, Peter and John. These women told her and the rest, that they had seen at the tomb, two men in shining garments, at sight of whom they had been afraid, and had bent down, but who had told them that the Lord was risen; and also that as they came to tell this, they had seen Christ, on the way, and had held him by the feet and worshipped Him. But these accounts seemed to the apastles at that time as idle tales, and they did not believe them. u n tt r soldiers of the guard too, when they recovered from their fainting-fit, and went to the chief Priests to tell them what they had seen, were silenced with large sums of money, and were told by them to say that the disciples had stolen the Body away while they were asleep. But it happened that on that same day, Simon and Cleopas Simon one of the twelve apostles, and Cleopas one of the followers of Christ w % ere walking to a village called Emmaus, at some little distance from Jerusalem, and were talking, by the way, upon the death and resurrection of Christ,

The Theatrical World —— Morton Downey Triumphs in Own Well-Staged Revue at Palace; Lyric Offers Zasu Pitts and Slim Summerville in Love Birds BY WALTER D. HICKMAN “

BY WALTER D. HICKMAN Morton downey always will be remembered here for the way in which he is singing “The Rosary” in his revue, “Melody and Madness,” on the Palace stage this week. This number comes near the close of the revue and is done

with so much feeling that it becomes a class i c. Mr. Downey’s voice lifts the melody to new heights. A male ensemble placed behind a transparent drop gives Mr. Downey magnificent support. This delightfully serious moment vanishes when Mr. Dow-

Miss Evans

ney and his assistants begin a most pleasing presentation of “The Rhythm of the Raindrops.” This is the closing number and uses the entire company, the Britton comedy band, Miss Ruth Ford, a character comedienne and dancer, a finely trained and well appearing dancing ensemble. Mr. Downey also sings “Three Little Pigs” and “Did You Ever See A Dream Walking?” Mr. Downey has great energy and is in excellent voice. Here is one of those fine, clean revues which is a compliment to the American variety stage. The is a comedy hokum organization. The members break violins over their heads, throw several gallons of water over themselves and finally tear down all the scenery. There are many laughs while this band is tearing up the stage. It is something entirely different in the way of stage bands. Miss Ford gives a number of comedy character impressions, such as Rosie going to the movies and the girl who thought she had a grand opera voice. The dancing ensemble wears beautiful costumes and is splendidly trained. The act has been staged in splendid taste from beginning to end. The movie is “The Show Off” with Spencer Tracy and Madge

Rags and Riches U. S. Workers Expected ‘Touch’ From Shabby Visitor, but He Only Wanted to Pay Income Tax!

A GRIZZLED old man in a ragged, dirty overcoat and soiled slouch hat shuffled wearily down the hall in the federal building.

He looked toward several federal employes talking near the stairs and shyly walked over to them. "Could you tell me where I go to show the officials my business affairs?" he asked in a hesitant tone. tVhen he was asked what specific department he was looking for, he shook his head and produced a soiled red ledger. Under the heading of "Business

when they were joined by a stranger, who explained the Scriptures to them, and told them a great deal about God. so that they wondered at his knowledge. As the night was fast coming on when they reached the village, they asked this stranger to stay with them, which he consented to do. When they all three sat down to supper, he took some bread, and blessed it, and broke it, as Christ had done at the Last Supper. Looking on him in wonder, they found that his face was changed before them, and that it was Christ himself; and as they looked on him, he disappeared. They instantly rose up, and returned to Jerusalem, and finding the disciples sitting together, told them what they had seen. While they were speaking, Jesus suddenly stood in the midst of all the company, and said “Peace be unto ye!” Seeing that they were greatly frightened, he showed them his hands and feet; and invited them to touch Him; and, to encourage them and give them time to recover themselves, he ate a piece of broiled fish and a piece of honeycomb before them all. But Thomas, one of the Twelve Apostles, was net there, at that time; and when the rest said to him afterwards, “We have seen the Lord!” he answered “Except

Evans. It has been reviewed in this department. Now at Loew’s Palace. o tt tt Double Bill at Indiana THE mov’e bill at the Indiana this week includas two feature movies—“ Once to Every Woman” and “She Made Her Bed.”, The better of the twe movies is

“Once to Every Woman,” a melodramatic story of a great modern hospital, the Hollywood conception of such an institution, which has the acting services of Ralph Bellamy, Fay Wray as a nurse; Walter Connolly as a doctor and head of the hospital, who discovers he is too

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Miss Ellers

old and his methods the same; Walter Byron as the not so desirable doctor, and Mary Carlisle as a nurse who is more interested in vigorous young doctors than she is in ailing patients. The dialogue could be more human and natural than it often is, especially some of the things Miss Wray has to say. There is a lot of suspense in this movie when the doctors perform one important surgical operation after another. Extreme melodrama is injected when poison is left in handy reach of a patient who does not want to live. That's the Hollywood touch which erases all realism. The story indicates that once in the life of every woman she falls in love with a worthless man, but tosses him over and finally lands a good and worthy one. That's the experience Miss Wray has in this story. The. other movie, “She Made her Bed,” has the services of Richard Arlen as a patent medicine man, Sally Eilers as the wife of an auto camp owner and Robert Armstrong as her philandering and worthless hubby. His hobby is to tame lions. Melodrama is piled upon melodrama. The story just doesn't make sense. There is one tremendous object lesson in this movie. If a lion gets in your home

Transactions." were listed a group of figures classified by months. Each month's total ran into four figures. Told that he probably would be asked to file an income tax return, the old man was directed to the internal revenue department. "Wheel” exclaimed one of the employes, "I thought that old man was a panhandler and that he was going to ask me for a dime to get something to eat.’*

THE INDIANAPOLIS TIMES

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I shall see in his hands the print of the nails, and thrust my hand into his side, I will not believe!” At that moment, though the doors were all shut, Jesus again appeared, standing among them, and said, “Peace be unto you!” Then he said to Thomas, “Reach

and your house gets on fire at the same time, just lock your baby in the ice box. Under this insane Hollywood formula, the second you open the ice box, your baby will be cooing and smiiing and his beard will net even be frost bitten. Oh, hum—that’s too strong for me. Now at the Indiana. a tt tt Comedy Week at Lyric 'THIE Lyric returns, for this week’s stage presentation, to a six-act vaudeville routine. Ames and Arno open the show with some music and a great deal of clowning, jokes and not-so-fancy dancing. After a slow start, their offering improves.

George Lyons plays the harp, but more than that, he makes that littleknown instrument almost talk. After playing one balladtype number he goes into an un-harp-like arrangement of “St. Louis Blues,” which he plays in ,a rhythmic man-

ner. Arren and Broderick take some digs at grand opera in their vocal and piano numbers. The girl is particularly good at mimicry and old-fashioned slap-stick antics. She sings, in a nice falsetto voice, “Mighty Like a Rose,” and suddenly displays that she has been standing on a pair of roller skates, on which she glides from the stage. The male member of this act is very good on his instrument. the piano, playing his ANNOUNCES CANDIDACY TOR REPRESENTATIVE William Jennings Layton Seeks Democratic Nomination. William Jennings Layton. 410 South Harlan street, today announced he will be a candidate for the Democratic nomination for state representative from Marion county in the May primary. Mr.' Layton, a barber, is married and has one child. He is a member of the Barbers’ Union and an active worker in the Sixteenth Ward Democratic Club. He will make his campaign on a platform of strict economy in public office, and tax reduction. LEGION DINNER CLUB WILL HOLD LUNCHEON Hilton U. Brown Post Group to Meet Tomorrow. The first luncheon of the weekly dinner club of the Hilton U. Brown Jr. post, American Legion, will be held at 12:15 tomorrow on the seventh floor of the Board of Trade building. The luncheon club committee of the post is composed of Herman Bobbe, Ed Holmes and Harold Brown.

The Angel at the Sepul chre, by Gustave Dore

hither thy finger, and behold my hands; and reach hither thy hand, and thrust it into my side; and be not faithless, but believing.” And Thomas answered, and said to Him, “My Lord and my God!” Then said Jesus, “Thomas,

last number exceptionally well. Burt and Hickey pull some fast ones as they jabber furiously through their scene, not always keeping their humor too clean. The Alexander and Santos company has nice variety and skill in their work. One girl plays the piano and saxophone, two others sing and dance, and the two men put on some of the funniest dancing seen in recent years. In the first part of the act, one of the men, dressed in a girl’s ballet skirt and a man’s formal coat and shirt, does a ballet dance with his partner which is a scream. His toe-dancing is exceptionally well done. In the last scene of the act the two men do a nice acrobatic dance routine, one girl sings, one plays a clarinet and the other the piano, blending into an unusually pleasing effect. The Tom Lomas troupe, which closes the stage show, is a fair band of acrobats. The eliir.ax of their stunt is when they all strut forth on the stage attired in large grotesque masks and walking on stilts, varying in height, from five to almost fifteen feet. The picture on view this week is a side-splitting comedy featuring Zasu Pitts and Slim Summerville, and called “Love Birds.” It concerns the activities of a school teacher who yearns for peace and quiet and a chicken fancier whose whole life is

Mr. Summerville

SIDE GLANCES

! X Tin L > i-..- —-7-7 ' XX* |(sT| hPSX I- X -i I I X ; 1 1 6 jmN /' ■'2f\ !'l "hr l- ' j ' .x 3 e 1934 BY NEA sen VICE, INC. 1"

, “No, Tm not hurt but the farmer had a very valuable cow—”

because thou hast seen me, thou hast believed. Blessed are they that have not seen me, and yet have believed.” Copyright for North and South America, 1934, by United Feature Syndicate, Inc., all rights reserved). (Continued Tomorrow)

wrapped up in his feathered friends. The picture is one of the best that these two comedians have made and the story is a great deal better than the usual vehicle provided for such antics. There is a lot of hokum and slap-stick and the mannerisms of each of these two clowns go to make the picture a hilarious one. It is comedy week at the Lyric this week. • Now at the Lyric. (By the Observer.) tt tt tt WILL ROGERS in “David Harum” is in its third week at the Apollo. It has been reviewed in this department. The Circle is presenting Fredric March in “Death Takes a Holiday,” tvhich has been discussed here. MARRIAGE‘OFFICE BUSY ON ST. PATRICK’S DAY Patron Saint and Cupid Lead Twen-ty-four Couples to Altar Here. St. Patrick and Dan Cupid apparently collaborated in influencing forty-eight persons to tie the knot on St. Patrick’s day, Fred Lay, marriage license clerk, disclosed today. He issued twenty-four marriage licenses Saturday, despite thg fact that office closed promptly at noon in accordance with courthouse regulations.

By George Clark

Fair Enough By Westbrook Pegler AND now. mv friends, the boys are coming down the aisle 10 the ring for the greatest natural match ever presented between two champion American heroes. Mr. Roosevelt hops up the steps In his corner, smiling confidently. My goodness, hear that crowd cheer! I certainly hope you can catch these cheers for Mr. Roosevelt. He looks fine. Mr. Roosevelt certainly looks great. And now. here he comes, ne's coming down the

aisle, he's climbing the steps, lie's in his corner. Colonel Charles A. Lindbergh is in the ring and he is standing in his own corner with a soit of scowl on his face and the crowd is going wild over Colonel Lindbergh. Yes, sir, my friends, what I mean, believe you me, this crowd certainly is wild over Lindy, but not quite as wild as it is going over President Roosevelt. Believe you me, my friends. I wish you could be here with us at this arena for this titanic conflict between the two great mammoth goliath American heroes, President Franklin D. Roasevelt and Colonel Charles

A. Lindbergh. The President is smiling and the Colonel seems a little sore about something. As you all know, the President is giving his entire end to charity. The President doesn't figure to make a dime out of this fight. He is one man in this wor'd who doesn't seem to care about his own future. He probably figures that if such a terrible pasi like the one he went through there in those years when he was paralyzed and couldn't lick him. then he probably figures the future is bound to be a push-over for him. And he doesn’t want anything out of this but the cheers. tt tt it G. O. P. Emits Boos COLONEL LINDBERGH certainly seems sore. The President rushed over to shake his hand and give him a big smile, but the colonel just dropped his mitt into the President s hand like a cold poultice. No life in it. Then he sort of scowled and turned away. I’m beginning to hear a few boos around the arena just now. They seem to come from over in the Republican section, way back there in the steerage. The Republican national committee is sitting there in a body, my friends, and the booing seems to be coming from back there. There’s some booing coming up from the ringside rows, too. The forgotten man is booing a few boos for himself. I can’t make cut whom he is booing—but it isn't President Roosevelt. I don’t like to believe he is booing Colonel Lindbergh, but he is booing just the same, and he isn’t booing the President. The forgotten man has just hopped up, my friends, and hopped up the steps into the President's corner. He shoves Jim Farley aside, Big Jim Farley, the President's chief second —the forgotten man shoved him aside and grabbed the President’s right hand and shook it so hard he nearly yanked his arm out by the roots. And the crowd is going wild with excitement. General Johnson is up in the President's corner, too. The general grabs a water bottle and he reaches down, he reaches down and bam! Oh, boy, the general just reached down with the President’s water bottle and crashed it or somebody’s head. I can’t see just whose head he busted that water bottle on, but it was somebody that was booing the President. I think it was a steel manufacturer. No, it was an automobile man. No, wait a minute. Yes, it was a big aviation company promoter. Not a flier, but a stock promoter. General Johnson certainly socked him a pip, my friends. They are carrying the promoter out through the crowd. The crowd is cheering and the Republican national committee is booing again. a a tt And the Battle’s On COLONEL LINDBERGH'S manager is whispering in his ear. His manager is a high-priced corporation lawyer. He is whispering away as they wait for the bell. The Colonel is certainly cross about something. He just nods his head and scowls. He has a lot of seconds oehind him, all wealthy looking men in high hats, from the big aviation companies. I wish I could give you a picture of the working press rows at this great titanic conflict of the outstanding American heroes. From here I see Uncle Louie Howe, the President’s secretary, waiting as fast as he can on his typewriter for a syndicate. Then I see Mrs. Roosevelt over there. She is uniting away, too, describing it from the woman’s angle. Then I see Mrs. Dali, the President’s daughter, and she is writing away as fast as she can. And the Rcosevelt children, Sistie and Euzzie, are covering the contest from the children’s angle. They are doing their writing in spelling blocks. Sistie is eating an ice cream cone and getting it all over her. There’s some more booing. That’s from a delegation of unemployed writers. They are sore at Uncle Louie and the Roosevelt family for muscling in on the writing business. But, wait. They are not booing any more. General Johnson and Jim Farley jump down off the ring and sign them all up for government jobs as secretaries and the unemployed writers now are cheering. Now they’re in the center of the ring for their instructions. The President is smiling and Colonel Lindbergh still is frowning. Lindbergh has a big w r ad of paper in his bathrobe pocket. It looks like aviation stock from here, but I can’t quite make out. Now the referee is in the ring, and wow l wow! w T ow! wow! Who do you think the referee is in this titanic struggle between the mastadonic American heroes? It’s the common man, my friends. The common common man is refereeing. Bell. There they go! (Copyright, 1934. by United Feature Syndicate. Inc.)

Today's Science ——- BY DAVID DIETZ =— —

'T'HE chances are that it is impossible for any youngster born since the World war to visualize a world without automobiles. Yet the coming of the motor car lies within the memory of the present generation and most of the pioneers of the development are still among the living. "It is probable that no invention of such farreaching importance was ever diffused with such rapidity or so quickly exerted influences that ramified through the national culture, transforming even habits of thought and language,” wrote the Hoover research committee on social trends in discussing the automobile. The General Motors Corporation has just celebrated the tw'enty-fifth anniversary of its founding and in honor of that event, Arthur Pound has written a history of the corporation under the title of “The Turning Wheel.” Dcubleday, Doran & Cos. publish the book at 53.51. It is illustrated with drawings by William Heyer. many of considerable historical interest. a a a of science, the automobile is still guided and nourisned by science. Attention is called to this fact in a chapter of The Turning Wheel,’' entitled "Research: The March of thv Open Road.” “When the history of America is written centuries hence, it wall be noted that in the first quarter of the twentieth century, nusiness began to subsidize scientific research,” Mr. Pound writes. General Motors, Mr. Pound tells us. made its first move toward the creation of a research laboratory in 1911. In 1920, General Motors increased its research activities by taking over the Dayton Engineering Laboratories Company and making it the basis for the organization of the General Motors Research Corporation.

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Westbrook Pegler