Indianapolis Times, Volume 45, Number 23, Indianapolis, Marion County, 7 June 1933 — Page 4

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The Indianapolis Times (A SCRiri’S-UOWAED NEWSPAPER ) HOY W. HOWARD Fresiclrnt 'i U.COTT POWELL . m Editor EARL D. BAKER Business Manager Phone—Rlky 6331

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fine ijiyfit nn<l the I'tOplo Will find Their Own Raw

WEDNESDAY. JUNE 7. 1333.

A HALF-WAY TAX BILL A BETTER and fairer tax plan can be passed by the senate than the one in the administration bill reported out by the finance committee. In contrast to other parts of its strong new deal program, the administration's tax plans have been weak from the beginning. None of tlioif- official plans has held to the Democratic platform pledge of a tax system based on the principle of ability to pay. It is true that the President turned thumbs down on the defeated general sales tax when the Republican old guard and certain Democrats tried to revive the fight in the house. For this. Mr. Roosevelt deserves credit. He has saved us at least from the worst form of an insidious, disguised and indirect tax which rests heaviest on the poor and which Is most difficult to repeal, once it has been fastened on the country. Os the four original alternative plans submitted to the house by the administraton, . the three which did not include the general rales tax were based on an increase in normal income and special consumption taxes. The normal income tax burden falls with most w eight on the salaried middle class. That class should be made to carry u heavier load only after the rich have paid more through surtax increases. The proposed consumption taxes, whether on breakfast necessities or gasoline, of course, hit the poor man hardest, the middle class next, and the rich least. This system, in other words, is an exact reversal of the platform pledge of taxing on the principle of ability to pay. Fortunately, the expose of Morgan's failure to pay income taxes provoked so much public resentment that the administration junked most of ihe house plan in favor of a half way reform now reported out by the senate committee. This new administration bill would raise $227,000,00(1 as follows: Tax of 1-10 of 1 per cent on capital valuation of corporations, plus a 5 per cent tax on profits over 12T per cent, to yield $80,000,000; a 5 per cent tax on dividends, collected at source, to yield $70,000,000; addition tax of !* cent a gallon on gasoline. to yield $62,000,000; administrative changes in'income tax laws, to yield $15,000,000. The administrative changes to plug some of the holes through which the Morgans and others have escaped all income tax payment are admirable. The additional tax on gasoline is inexcusable. It js a sales tax already pre-empted by the states and already worked to death, as shown by the house report on double taxation. Automobile taxes of various kinds already amount to more than $1,000,000,000 a year. State gasoline taxes alone are more than half a billion dollars. In addition, there are the duplicating city and county gasoline taxes and the triplicating federal gasoline tax of $138,000,000. The consumer is paying. These combined taxes account for 48 per cent of the retail price of gasoline. On the wholesale price, these levies amount to a sales tax running in different parts of the country from 135 to 240 per cent. Under these circumstances, to propose additional federal gasoline taxes is absurd. The provisions for 5 per cent tax on dividends, the 1-10 ofT per cent tax on corporation capital values and excess profit tax, are all good as far as they go. But to raise enough revenue and to carry out the Democratic platform pledge of taxing according to ability to pay, all those taxes should be graduated upward progressively as in the case of the normal income tax. Not only should the excess profit tax be graduated, but it- should begin with profits of 8 or 9 per cent rather than 12 T- per cent. Finally, the surtax on individual incomes, especially in the upper brackets, should be increased. THE GOVERNMENT AS EDUCATOR SENATOR CARTER GLASS is one of the scholars of the senate. It is, therefore, all the more surprising that he should insist upon viewing the senate in the guise of a police court and resenting its assumption of the role of a national educational institution. Mr. Glass holds that the senate is wasting its time because Mr. Morgan has not been, and probably will not be. proved an overt criminal. Unless it can get the results expected by a police magistrate, the investigating committee should, presumably, close its deliberation. It docs not seem to have occurred to Senator Glass that the senate has in its power to give the people of the United States the most cogent and relevant bit of education in economics which it ever has received from the national capital. This is the real significance of the Morgan investigation, as it is also of the trial of Charles Mitchell. Whether some prominent banker entrains for Atlanta in the company of a United States marshal is of far less fundamental import than the possibility of giving the American people a decisive impression of the menacing character of an economic system dominated by finance, capitalism, and speculative cupidity. The dominion of speculative finance was the core of the “old deal" which threw us to the dogs. It is the primary obstacle to the realization of a “new deal” which possesses any promise of adequacy and permanence. The question at issue is whether the United States will be governed from the White House or from 23 Wail street. If Mr. Roosevelt actually is supporting th? Investigation of the financial barons, this shows that he is a realist, on whom we may pin some substantial hope. If the investigation of Mr. Morgan and tl|s

other moguls of the speculative hierarchy iSj to be fully educational and ultimately ameliorative, it is necessary that the country shall not miss the main point because of dramatic and colorful details. We resolutely must avoid the personal devil interpretation Neither Mr. Morgan nor his partners are friends They are, at worse, no more than the custodians* of a fiendish economic system. And most of them probably are profoundly unconscious of its nuuevolent character. Such revelations aS Mr Morgan’s failure to pay an income tax. the list of favored individuals on his stock-bargain fist, the concentration of financial control, and the dominion of the private bankers over our basic public utilities are all of real significance. As much should be made of them as their intrinsic merits warrant. But the real core of the whole matter is the fact that Mr. Morgan and his like have achieved a directive control over the American economic order and that their ideals and practices are more fatal to any successful continuance of the capitalistic order than the assaults of a dozen Moscow's from the outside. If capitalism is to survive, primary attention must be devoted to assuming a large and adequately renumerated consuming public, to giving permanence and stability to productive enterprise, to adjusting production to consumptive needs and abilities, and to guaranteeing the mercantile classes a sufficient and relatively steady market. The service of human needs for a reasonable profit to the entrepreneur must give the dominating motivation. Unless a sufficient quantity of needed goods can be sold steadily to the masses, the capitalistic system must, sooner or later, fold up, even though there be not so much as a revolutionary whisper abroad in the land Finance must be reduced to its logical position as the humble but essential adjunct of sound business. It is because the system of control which Mr. Morgan symbolizes either ignores or fiercely opposes every tenet and practice upon which the rehabilitation and perpetuation of a chastened capitalism depends that it must be rooted out, if we are to have any new deal this side of collapse and disorder. Mr. Roosevelt asserts that his “new deal” is based upon the notion of the co-partnership of all economic affairs. A regime conceived in instability and dedicated to the speculative profits of the few at the expense of all the rest of human society offers no hospitality at any point to the conceptions and practices of a copartnership in industry and prosperity. This is the real import of the Morgan inquiry, and this is what must be driven home if it is to possess any true educational significance for American citizens.

ABSURDITIES OF OUR PROBLEMS of the most encouraging things about the world’s present difficulty is the fact that all its major problems are in the highest degree irrational. They need only to be stated to have their inherent absurdity made obvious; and the more they are stated and examined, the more likely i* becomes that mankind will recognize their absurdity and do away with them. There never was a time before when natural forces make nations neighborly as strongly as they do now. World-wide communication is an accomplished fact. Distances have shrunk to mere fractions oi their old length. The increasing complications of world finance and trade have made all countries inter-dependent. Anew network of treaties has been set up to preserve peace. Events have compelled the dullest men to realize that war costs more than it can be worth. Yet in the face of all these facts, one of our very greatest problems is the problem of keeping the peace. The world is drifting toward war in spite of the fact that it has more reasons for staying at peace than it ever had before. ’ It is the same in the economic fidd. We have developed the art of production to the point where poverty need no longer exist. We can make more of everything than we possibly need. The masses of mankind can enjoy more luxuries than the wealthy could have a few generations ago. Yet, poverty is increasing and we suffer from a shortage of nearly everything; and as Edward A. Filene, the Boston merchant, has pointed out, poverty has increased most rapidly in those nations whose ability to produce wealth has been augmented most. Similarly, world trade today ought to thrive as never before. The facilities for it never were so great; the need of the various nations for the things produced by their neighbors never was so great; the financial arrangements whereby the flow of goods is made easy never were so well developed. But world trade dwindles, year by year, and most nations have been busy cutting it down still further by means of tariffs, import restrictions, quota laws and the like. These problems, when examined carefully, simply don’t make sense. It is too much to expect that we shall presently find a way to start moving with the tide instead of against it?

, SOCIAL INSURANCE T“\R CHARLES H. MAY’O. famed Rochester surgeon, says that medical science has lengthened man’s life expectancy fifteen years in the last half century. Expectancy of what? of fifteen years more poverty, fear, and insecurity, or fifteen years of serene security? Science has served amazingly in reducing the bodily hazards that menace life and health. Now statesmanship must serve as zealously to reduce the social hazards that beset us all. Nebraska just has adopted an old age pen- * sion law, and thus becomes the twenty-fifth state to provide a minimum of security for the aged poor. Old age pensions should be extended to every state by means of federal aid. Assurance of security should, however, go further. In most of the old Age pension states, the benefits begin at 65. Industrial hazards threaten the workers at every step from youth to age. There should be a system of insurance covering the three main social risks of the workers of American industry—old age dependency, unemployment, and sickness. Accepting the call to this larger task, the American Association for Old Age Security

just has announced the widening of its program covering these three hazards, it declares that' “unless provision is made against the other major hazards of modem life, the old age pension laws can not fulfill their true function." Surprising success has rewarded the campaign for old age pensions. American workers will hope for even quicker victories in the campaign for other social insurance. ADVICE TO THE MARRIED TN the ruling handed down recently by an advisory master in a New Jersey divorce case, there is a little food for thought which a lot of married folk profitably might ponder over. A husband, in this case, sued for divorce because Iris wife occasionally caused him humiliation by drinking more than was good for her. The advisory master chosen by the court, after pointing out that the wife had reared a family for her husband, asserted that the humiliation she caused him, “when weighed against the privileges, joys, and comforts of the rest of his married life, made forbearance a marital duty.” There is a little truth which every happily married couple knows very well. No two people can live together for years without hurting one another occasionally. Most married folk, however, know something of the duty of forbearance. If they all did, the divorce courts would do a lot less business. FRAGMENTS OF CONTROL An Editorial from The Wall Street .Journali TTERE is the issue now involved in the bill for the control of industry—whether it is t;o set up control or is to be only a pious admonition to industry to frame codes which a recalcitrant minority may defeat. Evidently twelve members cf the senate finance committee, including seven members of the President’s party, believe the country will fare better under a pious admonition than under two years of real governmental control of industry. If they have their way, this measure, which begins by declaring the existence of “a national emergency productive of widespread unemployment and disorganization of industry" will end by applying to the emergency no more than a weak palliative treatment, consisting chiefly of a temporary relaxation of the anti-trust laws and a section setting up labor conditions which in themselves will go far to discourage the making of voluntary trade agreements thereunder. In all'probability the house, if not the senate itself, will decide that such fragmentary “control" is not worth while. June 15 is the date set for the payment of both European war debt installments and in-' come tax installments to Uncle Sam. The difference is, of course, that the income tax installments will be paid. Lots of old-fashioned political practices have disappeared under President Roosevelt's “New Deal,” observes a Washington correspondent. Probably they were lost in the shuffle. Chicago world fair is exhibiting George Washington’s false teeth, which he was instructed to soak in liquor if they became too white. The hard part about it, however, was that George had to remove them first. “Indiana Farmer Plows Up $7,000 in Field" —Headline. It's gratifying to know that there is at least qne man who can make farming pay these days. A young wife’s most anxious moment, says a woman's page writer, is when she bakes her first cake. Yes, and for her husband when he eats a slice of it.

M.E.Tracy Says:

IN these days of automobiles and airplanes, walking seems rather slow to most people, yet a man still can make money at it if possessed of sufficient speed and endurance. Dan O’Leary, who died in Los Angeles recently at the ripe old age of 90, did little but walk during his mature life. He is said to have covered more than 300,000 miles on foot, nearly half of it in races or exhibitions. Few automobile, motorcycle, or airplane owners ever will see as much of the world as did Mr. O’Leary, and those few will not see it so thoroughly or understandingly. The man who walks, even at high speed, has time to look. Better still, he has time to think. Walking was the first mode of transportation, and it will probably be the last. Men were built for it, which means that they can not abandon it without sacrificing something of great value. Unless psychologists are all wrong, mental vigor and bodily health go together, and walking is an easy way to preserve the latter. 808 TTtTALKERs usually live long, which is not VV true of all athletes. Walking represents steadiness rather than strain. Besides, as most walkers testify, it stimulates interest in life. Men and women who can walk never are at a loss for means of getting somewhere. They can go even if the car is in the shop or the price of a railroad ticket is lacking. They can take paths and short cuts closed to mechanical vehicles, thus enjoying scenes which are beyond the reach of those in apparently better circumstances. The concrete road and steel track have their disadvantages, and these disadvantages go much deeper than the obvious physical limitation. People who travel in ruts, think in ruts, losing that flexibility of mind which is an important factor of true intelligence. They become afraid of getting off the beaten path, cease to pioneer or adventure, even in a small way. and eventually settle down to a routine, narrowing existence. Walking has a definite connection with character. It develops a certain feeling of independence and creates an interest in those things which require personal observation to understand. BBS THE man who walks to and from work knows a great deal more about his neighborhood than the man who uses an automobile. This country was explored largely and laid out by walkers. Trails that have become great highways originally were blazed by men on loot. The spirit and self-assurance back of it ail are chiefly responsible for the more vital elements of our civilization. The fast vehicles we have developed serve an excellent purpose, but. like everything else, they can be at .sed. Civiliz: cion must not enslave itself to its own creatures or pursue the theory that progress is a matter of substitution, when it is a matter of improvement. The human body is not only the finest, but the most essential, machine known to man. Whatever else happens, nothing must be allowed to interfere with those habits and cusoms necessary to its care and preservation*

THE INDIANAPOLIS TIMES

(Times readers are invited to express their views in these columns. Make your Utters short, so all can hare a chance. Limit them to 250 words or less.) By Charles M. Iligman. Without qualification or reservation, no responsible person seriously contends that prohibition can be enforced. The highest authority we have on the subject: namely, the Wickersham commission, gives the j nation to understand that the eleven-year effort in that direction has wholly failed. Let the Anti-Saloon League and its henchmen have whatever satisfaction they will get out of the report, and let the fanatic “drys" and “die-hards” celebrate their dubious victory to their heart’s content. The reasonable and open-minded and conscientious citizen deduces from the findings of this report that national prohibition has proved to be and always will be an ignominious failure. In this country one can start out with the proposition that man not only is sovereign as a unit in our social scheme, but sovereign as to himself. This means that he has inherently the privileges of ordering his own private life. This principle is technically called the “ethos” of our American democracy. Inconsistent as the eighteenth amendment may be with the original fabric of the Constitution, harmful as its effects have proved to be, socially and economically considered, one would be willing to honor it and abide by it and suffer under it with the rest of our fellowbeings if the move for its enactment had been inspired honestly at the time, and if its ratification by the states had been the deliberate act of the people of the United States. But it is charged on good authority that the eighteenth amendment was conceived in fraud and clandestinely and surreptitiously ratified by the states. It was shystered through the legislatures by the dry minority at a time when the public mind throughout the nation was steeped in grief. No decent man would hold another accountable on a contract, signed, or silently acquiesced in, while standing at the bier of his be- ■ loved child, distracted by anguish and grief, oblivious and unsconscious j of secular affairs. The fanatics took j advantage of the American people in a similar state of mind. In stealth and with a sinister secrecy the Anti-Saloon League inspired its minions in both parties to j aspire to membership in general as- ! semblies in every state, and there- | upon promoted and subsidized their \ candidacies —all with a view to springing the ratification coup in the assemblies to meet in 1918—)

THE tissues of most human beings demand a certain amount of rest, a change in position, and general exercise to keep them in the best of condition. The introduction of new ways of living or of changes in physical habits is likely to be associated with various disorders affecting the body. French investigators recently called attention to certain forms cf neuritis and pains in the joints of the left arm likely to be associated with driving a motor car with the window open and the arm on the sill. This is especially likely in the summer when motorists drive for long periods, keeping the window open during a rainfall or during the coolness of the night. Another investigator has de-

A NOTHER three men killed in il the Indianapolis motor race. The public has come to regard these smashups as a mere matter of course. The crowds, as pictured by the news reels and explained by the press stories, are as avid for these dangerous thrills as the Romans were for their no more gory spectacles. And of all the ruthless, senseless waste of human life. The utter stupidity of such useless foolhardiness! Although we have speed laws that prevent any one’s doing more than sixty miles on an open highway, we keep building racers that will do 110 or more. Just for the fun of seeing accidents, one presumes. , I don’t know just where it would

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The Message Center

New Pains Afflict Automobile Drivers

Look — We're on a List, Too!

Starvation Pay By Miss R. B. TT is amusing to read the periodical outbursts of William Green, president of the American Federation of Labor. Last week he warned the American people of starvation wages paid by some manufacturers and business houses of the country. Friday he summoned labor leaders to meet in Washington next Tuesday to see that labor received its share of wage adjustments and hours of labor. I formerly was employed by an international labor organization located in Indianapolis. I was furloughed, due to the depression, and of course I am in position to know that some of the girls and also some of the married men with families are paid a wage that hardly enables them to buy the bare necessities of life, let alone receive a living wage. It only goes to show how sincere the so-called labor leaders are, and to my way of thinking, the less attention the President and congress pay to these four-flush-ers, the better off the country will be. fixed and packed to deliver the ratifying vote. No fair-minded person will ever contend that the adoption of the eighteenth amendment was the deliberate act of the people. The majority of the people are not now and never were in favor of the amendment. It was forced on the people by the worst chicancery known. The American people never will tolerate a law in which they had no voice in the making, and which has the vigorous disapproval of twothirds of the masses. The people in their indignation are determined to disregard it and transgress it with impunity. By Charles M. Zink. Why repeal the eighteenth amendment? There is plenty of beer to “guzzle,” and it is not so difficult to get good hard liquor at the drug store. Repealing the eighteenth amendment is a dangerous precedent and threatens the rigidity of the Constitution of the United States. Nowhere in history is there any record of tampering with the Constitution by repealing any amendment, once it was adopted. If the eighteenth amendment is repealed, and a precedent thereby established, it would only be a step to promote a scheme next to repeal the nineteenth amendment, and only another step to the fifteenth amendment or any other amendment that 1

BY DR. MORRIS FISHBEIN

Editor Journal of the Ameriran Medical Association and of Hygeia, the Health Magazine. scribed a condition which he calls “driver’s thigh,” or fatigue and pain in the muscles of the right thigh among those who spend a considerable time at the wheel. This condition is likely to be mistaken for typical sciatica or sci-atic-neuritis, but, according to Dr. J. Hoets, who described it, the cause lies in the long-continued pressure on the sciatic nerve in the Icv/er third of the thigh by the sharp edge of the seat as a result of pressure on the accelerator pedal. The trouble is more apt to occur when the springs of the seat have given away, and may, of course, be prevented by changing the adjustment of the seat so as to

A Woman’s Viewpoint

BY MRS. WALTER FERGUSON

be safe or sensible to permit such speed anywhere else except on a specially built speedway. And will it ever matter even if we finally get one that can do 1,000? To develop speed in airplanes has a point, at least until the congestion is so great that we must have traffic signals in the sky. But for the ground—where are they to be used? B B B 'T'HOSE of us who have lived past our youth realize the necessity of life sacrifice for human progress. No great building, no bridge span, no outstanding enterprise ever is accomplished without its bloody toll. The martyrs of industry, miners under the earth, riveters on steel skeletons, workers on engineering

some “group" or “bloc" may wish to foster. It would seem reasonable that the women of this fair land of ours would ponder and think seriously about this question, in view of the possibility of disfranchisement, by the nineteenth amendment being threatened in the event of the precedent of repeal is established, by repealing the eighteenth amendment. And once the precedent is established, it is not beyond the range of possibility for some group who dislikes the Negro race to foster the repeal of the fifteenth amendment, on the theory that slavery never should have been abolished. Now that we have beer and whisky in Indiana, it would seem reasonable to keep all amendments in the Constitution. Repeal none of them. Don’t make a “football” of the Constitution of the U. S. A., but hold it firm and steadfast.

So They Say

The bigger the target, the easier it is to hit.—Ferdinand Pecora, chief counsel for senate committee in investigation of J. P Morgan & Cos. No woman in the world is worth shooting. The penalty is too great. —Judge George W. Martin of New York. The average American likes to think of himself as an -incipient capitalist.—Sherwood Anderson, novelist. The striking fact about what has been done since March 4 is not the wide grant of authority given to the present; it is the close harmony between President and the people.— Henry Morgenthau Jr., head of Farm Credit Administration. Economic considerations alone should condemn the proposed bargain with the brewers and distillers to trade off the eighteenth amendment for liquor revenue.—Dr. F. Scott Mcßride, general superintendent of the Anti-Saloon League of America. They tell me the Rockefellers aren’t doing any too well these days, either.—Kid Williams, former bantamweight champion, now a taxi driver. Airplane passengers today are very matter of fact. For the most part, they look out the windows for points of scenic interest or write letters or sleep.—lda Novelli, air liner stewardess.

get rid of the usual tilt backward or by placing a cushion on the seat so that the edge of the seat will not come in direct contact with the leg. Similar cases have been described among those who ride in the back seat for long periods of time, because the back seats now are made extremely deep, and there may be pressure from the edge of the seat on the lower third of the thigh. The incidence of foreign bodies In the eye, particularly when driving with the windows open, is so great that every motor car should carry first-aid equipment, including among other things a saturated solution of boric acid to be used in washing the eye and pledgets of sterilized cotton for use in removal of foreign bodies from the surface.

projects, these also die for their country. But they die in a great cause. But how shall we justify the useless waste of life we permit at these motor races, these air exhibitions, ail this stunting that seems to have become a part of our national being, and which we appear to enjoy as those whom we call barbarians enjoyed their human sacrifice in the arena. It may be true that nothing is accomplished without daredevil hazards, but such hazards have no meaning, and are a crime when they serve no useful purpose. A civil'zed public should forbicf these dangerous risks that have for their chief incentive the gold purse rather than the last engine.

-JUNE 7, 1933

It Seems to Me “BY HEYAYOOD BROUN-

\JEW Y’ORK. June 7.—1 hate to find myself in the position of j urging a curb upon faculty agitator. | Free speech and academic freedom • always have seemed to me impor- , tant issues. And yet I feel that j the proper educational authorities | ought to ask for the resignation of | President Frederick B. Robinson of ! tho College of the City of New York. I do not think this action should be taken merely because Dr. Robinson is a member of that small and I curious group which is so articulate ;n the celebration of the magnifi- | cence. the glory, and the necessity of war. He has a right to his opinions. unfortunate and unusual though they be. It is, perhaps his privilege to import to the colic ge campus outside agitators of his own kidney. To be sure, no one well can assert that it is a healthful or an inspiring sight to see the cloistered halls of learning all cluttered up with generals and vice-presidents of the D. A. R. even on a special occasion, such as Jingo Day. After all, if these people do not like the pacific sentiment of City college, which truly reflects the attitude of a vast majority of New Yorkers, why don't they go back where they came from? 808 \Minerva Yields to Mars alien busybodies and trouble makers tend to cast discredit upon the fair name of the institution when they insist upon spreading their propaganda for preparedness and other devices for inciting war within the peaceful hails and playing fields dedicated to learning. Not only has Dr Robinson given countenance and official sanction to these agitpoops, but their very presence has moved him into strange manifestations of personal warlike virility. He has forgotten the duties and the dignity of his position and taken up arms against all who disagreed with him and his board of foreign missions. Upon the last occasion of presidential perturbation it is true that Dr. Robinson was not in full regimentals And that he had forgotten his sidearms. But as a complete devotee of preparedness, he had provided himself with an umbrella and waving it around his head and uttering strange cries he charged upon a group of students in good standing and began to lay about him. For the glory of his guests and the R. O. T. C. Dr. Frederick B. Robinson became a dervish ready to give his life and his second-best umbrella to the proposition that bloodshed shall not vanish from the earth.

Forgot to Remember ' \ FTER the blare of bugles had I**- died away and Dr. Robinson j could shake the drumbeat from his ! ears, he might have been expected j to show a little gratitude to those | younger and wiser heads who took his umbrella away in a gallant, though fruitless, effort to prevent a college president from making a complete fool of himself. But, on the contrary, he bore a grude. and C. C. N. Y. now lives under a terror. Dr. Robinson has announced his intention of punishing every undergraduate who took part in the pacifist demonstration which roused him to fury. Twelve or more already have been suspended, and the end is not yet. Even more violent measures are to be used if the wild advice of an associate in the faculty is to be followed. Major Herbert M. Holton, assistant professor of hygiene, suggested that the athletes of C. C. N. Y. should organize a vigilance committee to root out the pacifists in the college. In other words, the football players are to be set upon the students. Already this spirit has borne fruit. I spoke at a meeeting just outside the college grounds the other night, and before getting up on the stepladder, I -was warned that barrages of eggs were being thrown from the roof of a neighboring building. B B B Not Even a Yolk I SPEAK without bitterness, although I was honored by no eggs. It may be that the siupply was exhausted or that the sharpshooter felt that spattering my old brown suit would be carrying coals to Newcastle. The hygienic professor’s suggestion of a Nazi band to take over control of the college also seems a little unnecessary. For several years it hardly has been possible to pass the Gothic arches of C. C. N. Y. without suddenly finding the academic calm of the college shattered by the sound of police sirens. Instead of the conventional Phi Beta Kappa key. Dr. Robinson seems to have attached a whistle to his watch chain. If Frederick B. Robinson has a suppressed desire to be a second lieutenant, I think he will do well to visit a psychoanalyst and have it brought up into consciousness. But until his complex has been resolved, he seems to me a gentleman most unfit to teach the young idea to shoot. (Coovrieht. 1833. bv The Timesi

Triviality BY EUGENIE RICTIART My cat, like a golden chrysanthemum, Lay curled asleep in the brilliant sun. You called to him, and he lightly came, Glowing and friendly to hear his name. Y”ou said. “What a very strange name for a cat! How did you happen to name him that?” Glancing away indifferently, I answered the question you put to me. By the merest chance it happened so. He’s named for a boy I used to know."